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Leen
August 03, 2006, 02:55 AM
I've been wondering about this issue for a while already so I like to hear from your point of views about it. Do you prefer to be single all your life or do you like to be married to someone and settle down? Single doesn't mean that you have to be a virgin or whatsoever. You can still live together with your boyfriend or girlfriend or ages. It's just that you don't get married. Some people remain single for the rest of their life living together with their desired partner. Some of them adopt children and all that but others prefer to marry someone they truly love and live happily ever after. What do you think? What's the pros and cons of being single and married? Which will you choose?

So far, I've only collected a few reasons as to why people remain single or married. Feel free to add in more or comment on them.

Single
Pros
-freedom
-no commitment
-like the status?? :p

Cons
-community might see you as an old book shelf?
-you can't get married? XD
-dying alone is bad news?

Married
Pros
-committed spouse
-have your own family and life
-something to show to the world that you are "wanted" by someone.

Cons
-commitment to husband, children
-no freedom
-more costly??
-no safety? Spouse might betray you?

Discuss. :)

Predator
August 03, 2006, 03:04 AM
:blink
You sure know, how to bring up heavy issues, don't you! XD

Well .... I think that marriage is needed only as a tool of insurance. Married people can have the property after their husbands/wifes death, in some countries even the pension (money paid, when retired). That's a Pros.

If you get bored, you need to go through the bother divorcing. That's a Con.

I wouldn't bother making marriage, just to get a social status like that. It's as hypocritic as the politeness, when you don't care.

siegfried
August 03, 2006, 04:23 AM
if you are living with a opposite gender how can it be called being single?you cant leave your partner when you feel like it so it can be considered as a commitment too.

I am 21 and I can say I am not ready to get married or to a serious relationship but I sure want to find somebody I truly love in future.I dont think being single forever is enjoyable.

ensngre
August 03, 2006, 04:48 AM
Well, of course, the pros and cons of both being married and being single differs from person to person. Some may think that commitment to husband/wife and children is a con, but I would think of it as a pro; if I marry and get children, I want to take care of them. I want to get committed. It doesn't matter if it becomes tough, they're still my family.

And, alas, as opinions are always biased, I'd say that dying alone isn't such a bad way of going out. You've probably taken good care of yourself your whole life, and should be pretty happy with just yourself.

That's only what I think at the moment. Tomorrow, it might change, as it probably will and have before. Tomorrow, maybe I'm feeling lonely, and definitely doesn't want to die alone.

Well, that's only my two cents' worth. :notrust Slim but really complete list you've got there.

The Boff
August 03, 2006, 06:02 AM
Im very torn in this issue. if i ever get a girlfriend that wants to marry me im gonna be in deep shit....
cause for me its more of a religious issue, and im not christian. im very no no on the whole christianity thing
so im not so fond of standing in a church and saying stuff like "yes i promise BEFORE GOD to love and honor..."
since i dont believe in god i would just be talking bullshit. and i dont want that, especially if this is a girl that i want to spend the rest of my life with. so im torn in this matter... im perfectly fine with spending the rest of my days with one person but
not a church wedding with all the god stuff.

Adam_xx
August 03, 2006, 06:18 AM
Single = Enjoyable.
Married = Not as much, but I'd do this.

Brede
August 03, 2006, 06:29 AM
@Boffen: can't you just register and 'marry' at the Marriage registry (or wherever that registers marriages) then? without the need of an elaborate church wedding and stuff.

i can't say i'm ready for the big M yet. then one day, a wise friend of mine pointed out that that's simply because I haven't found someone I want to marry yet. He (yes, this advice actually came from a guy) insists that I would think very differently once that special person appears. like siegfried posted, it would be nice to find someone to share your life with. But i don't believe in marrying just for the sake of marrying.

The Boff
August 03, 2006, 07:10 AM
@Boffen: can't you just register and 'marry' at the Marriage registry (or wherever that registers marriages) then? without the need of an elaborate church wedding and stuff.


yeah thats probably what i would say to my partner but that could bring loads of problems.. so
im just hoping for a girl that shares my opinions...

yeste
August 03, 2006, 08:05 AM
When I woke up this morning, somehow I never could have guessed that I’ll be discussing something this serious today!!!! He,he but that’s why it’s so great to wake up, you don’t know what’s gonna happen to you today!!!! The raw is late so WTH you just might hear what I have to say on this…

I must say that I find your list of pros and cons a bit different from what I had in mind, and also the definition of the single status is by my standards somewhat questionable…But nevermind that, I know what you wore saying so here’s how I see this…

The issue here is should someone get married for the right or the wrong reasons, or not get married at all!!! Let me clarify this, I know people who really got married for the right reasons, the things they believed in, and I’m happy to say that for the great number of them it worked out just fine!!! But, I know people who got married for the wrong reasons… such as pressure from the community/family, for the fun of it ( my favorite one! Never worked out for anyone!!! ) , and that one that’s been seen in history sooooo many times – getting pregnant!!!

What I see are the right reasons for getting married… well when two people are great together, complement each other, over all they just fit somehow… have a great deal of understanding for each other and are sure in the fact that they can’t spend the rest of their lives without their partner!!!!

The wrong ones… don’t feel like discussing them…

And finally, we come to the question… Even if all the reasons are there, should you get married or just continue living with that significant other….Now, this is tricky!!!

To me, it all depends on what your idea of marriage is… If you think this is a way of showing your commitment and love and the other traditional things that marriage stands for, than you should have no trouble doing it, but if you see these values as fake or too idealistic/not possible in real life, then don’t do it… Just continue living with someone…And follow your believes!!!



I know that different people see this subject in different ways, so my advice on this is you should do what you want, and not be pressured by anyone/thing!!! It’s a big deal that can turn out to be a great mistake or great happiness, so you’d have to consider your feelings on the subject aswell as the feelings of the other person involved!!!

Just a note here….Eileen, I’m kind of confused with the no freedom argument in the cons of married… Can you please clarify this somemore… What types of freedom did you have in mind? :p

LadyHatake
August 03, 2006, 08:09 AM
yeah thats probably what i would say to my partner but that could bring loads of problems.. so
im just hoping for a girl that shares my opinions...

Just remember: If she truely loves you, she'll respect your views on religion and will do a civil ceremony rather than a religious one ;)

I think that, one day, I'd like to be married. After I'm out of college and have gotten a stable career. Marriage is alot of work, you have to be able to balance your own needs with that of your spouse, and later you have to balance that with children, too. To me, marriage is a commitment of oneself to the person they love most, and that's something to take seriously. Just being able to live with that person and share your lives is one of the biggest statements of love there is.

I'm a big romantic at heart, so of course I want to find that 'one guy,' the one who's for me and only me. I won't marry just to be married, like others have said. I'll wait for that one guy I can't live without, because I don't want to divorce. But I have plenty of time for that, and like I said, I want to be able to have established my career before I settle down. Gotta have some fun when you're young, right? :)

The Boff
August 03, 2006, 08:35 AM
Just remember: If she truely loves you, she'll respect your views on religion and will do a civil ceremony rather than a religious one ;)


yeah hopefully, you intrested? :eyeroll :XD

LadyHatake
August 03, 2006, 09:00 AM
I would, but GK already asked ^^
You are rather handsome, though. :D

chaosenigma
August 03, 2006, 09:07 AM
I think that, one day, I'd like to be married. After I'm out of college and have gotten a stable career. Marriage is alot of work, you have to be able to balance your own needs with that of your spouse, and later you have to balance that with children, too. To me, marriage is a commitment of oneself to the person they love most, and that's something to take seriously. Just being able to live with that person and share your lives is one of the biggest statements of love there is.

I'm a big romantic at heart, so of course I want to find that 'one guy,' the one who's for me and only me. I won't marry just to be married, like others have said. I'll wait for that one guy I can't live without, because I don't want to divorce. But I have plenty of time for that, and like I said, I want to be able to have established my career before I settle down. Gotta have some fun when you're young, right? :)


This is pretty much exactly the way I see it. I definitely want to get married in the future once im financially stabilized. Not just to do it, but because of the symbolism the act represents, which means that you are fully committing yourself to your loved one. In body and soul, through anything and everything.

Like LadyHatake to an extent, I'm idealistic when it comes to love. If you are truly with someone you wish to be with, then marriage should by no means be considered a burden. To me when I see spouses signing prenups and the like, it doesn't represent total trust and devotion to your loved one, because you are leaving the option of splitting up in the future which is what marriage is supposed to eliminate.

Maybe a little idealistic for some, but thats the way I see it.

The Boff
August 03, 2006, 09:51 AM
You are rather handsome, though. :D


:redface :hug

Tamerlane
August 03, 2006, 11:39 AM
This is an interesting topic that I have a few things to add (not to mention that I am at work and bored to tears).

First of all I could not imagine being single for the rest of my life.....it would just seem so lonely and rather cold. I strongly believe that human beings in general crave love and affection for a reason, and to fullfil that desire they want to be with someone, and sometimes marriage offers more stability in that aspect. Dont get me wrong here there are a ton of reasons other than stability to get get married, I wont go thru them all here....it would take forever. x_x

Of course the trick is finding someone that matches you well enough that you want to spend your whole life with them. But once you have the fortune to find that person, I think that marriage is a wonderful way to show commitment to one another.

:amuse

(all my opions are rather biased though since I am getting married next year) >_>

ruby_06
August 03, 2006, 12:09 PM
I'd prefere to get married because mostly when we get old we will need someone who can take care of us and help us when we need him/her, but being single is not bad but only for a specific period of time, then you naturally will find yourselves wanting to be committed.
And also both have their problems but if you really respect and love the other party , then both of you can solve the problem.Being married doesnt mean there will be no freedom , well ofcourse it wont be as when you were single but you can get to hang out with your husband/wife anytime and it will be romantic.
So that is why i prefere to be committed than single,as in the future it would be lonely i agree

Ichimaru Gin n Tonic
August 03, 2006, 08:08 PM
Hmmm... Single or Married? Meditate on this I must.... Ok, let's give this a shot.
For me, being married means spending (hopefully) the rest your life with someone that can put up with you and everything there is about you like your bad habits, temper, weird traits, etc. It also means sharing, your laughs, your tears, your income (unless your pre-nupt says otherwise), your space, and of course, your freedom will be limited. Do I want all of that? You bet I do!
You wanna know why? Wouldn't it be great waking up next to someone that you love every morning and knowing that person loves you for who you are and what you're going to be and you love that person for the same reason?

thejackass98
August 03, 2006, 11:57 PM
heh well this is kinda interesting well me belives that in being married as a way to unite 2 different lives into one and even if being married you can have all the freedom you want but you have to share it to a certain point.. and for me being single you can still have kids....heh love childs but it still may give you a feeling of loneliness (which i dearly hate) so i would like to get married in near future but still got shit load of time as a free man :tem heh my greedy self can never let me die alone.... if i die some ones comin with meh




(all my opions are rather biased though since I am getting married next year) >_>


congratulations :smile-big

Leen
August 06, 2006, 10:59 PM
:D
The freedom that I'm talking about being a single is the freedom of going shoppings for 24 hours with no worries and so on. That's a freedom that marriage cannot guarantees someone. People have less freedom when they get married. They have obligations, duties to perform and commitments to stick to. However, being a single grants you endless freedom and youth that a married perso cannot experience. That's the freedom I'm talking about.

Other than that, marriage does have its good sides. At least you can proudly tell the world that "I am HIS" or "I am HERS." Marriage is a sign that this one person in the world had vowed to share his/her life with you no matter in whatever circumstances that you might be in. Be it sickness, wealth, etc, at least there would be one person in this world that will be there for you, that will care for you, that will help you go through that phase of your life. Single's partner however can just leave once the deadline is over. Once the hype of getting a new girlfriend/boyfriend is over, he/she can just dump you like that without thinking twice. This won't happen with a marriage since the opposite sex had taken a vow and that vow is meant to be kept "Till Death Do Us Part".

So...um......it is still hard for me to pick a stand in this issue.

HisshouBuraiKen
August 08, 2006, 08:41 PM
Gotta go with married (and not just because my wife's lurking about). The inner peace you have from knowing you have someone who loves you unconditionally and will always be there for you far outweighs the benefits of "unlimited freedom". I imagine that to most guys, "unlimited freedom" means "I can jack off whenever I want and leave the towel out." XD

Verena
August 15, 2006, 04:31 PM
I will die a spinster!

But before that will have a number liasons, with which all end in tragedy. Perhaps have child and raise it as single mother... hmmm. Then when I grow old I will by an old haunted house, prolifically perm my hair and wear all black. After that, I shall buy a load of tortoises and become the Mad Tortoise Witch/Lady.

Only then will I allow myself to die x3

Lol, that was plotted out by a friend of mine some time ago.

Nah, marriage doesn't appeal to me. I'll probably be a career-driven person.

kadoman
August 19, 2006, 03:26 PM
:D
The freedom that I'm talking about being a single is the freedom of going shoppings for 24 hours with no worries and so on. That's a freedom that marriage cannot guarantees someone. People have less freedom when they get married. They have obligations, duties to perform and commitments to stick to. However, being a single grants you endless freedom and youth that a married perso cannot experience. That's the freedom I'm talking about.

I hear what you're saying Leen. Fact is however, we each, in our everyday lives, have obligations and duties and commitments, whether these be in the workplace, with our extended families and friends, or our spouses. Many people (not aiming this at you) are under the misguided impression that marriage is 'give and take' and therefore 'restrictive', when the truth is that we must 'give and take' with everyone we work with and know. Give and take is a part of life as much as it is a part of marriage.

The bonus of giving and taking in marriage (or living together) is that you do it because you want to; because you love someone enough that you want them to be happy and you'll do what it takes to achieve that - and they do the same for you.

The other side of the coin to being single is that once you reach a certain age, being single is a very lonely existence. I know, because some of my friends who are now approaching their 40s and who put off marriage to concentrate on their careers, now cannot find anyone who they are compatible with (all the good one's are taken, they tell me) and long for companionship, nevermind love. All their friends are married with familes and have no time for them anymore, and they feel isolated and unloved.

Don't mean to sound like the wet blanket brigade there :tem and certainly that is not everyone's story! Some people are perfectly happy never being married. But I'm just presenting the flip side to the 'freedom' of the single life, which often has an expiry date.

Predator
August 19, 2006, 04:13 PM
... the flip side to the 'freedom' of the single life, which often has an expiry date.


True



Many people (not aiming this at you) are under the misguided impression that marriage is 'give and take' and therefore 'restrictive', when the truth is that we must 'give and take' with everyone we work with and know. Give and take is a part of life as much as it is a part of marriage.


Fact



All their friends are married with familes and have no time for them anymore, and they feel isolated and unloved.


Contradiction to overall context, especially the "no restrictions part".

...............
Well, that's how it is. Marriage is a formal agreement, same as any other piece of paper people sign.
People can doo pretty fine, give and take without any restrictions and duties without formality.

For instance, look at this MH community. We all give and take, but nobody calls this a marriage. Only because they can go and leave no trace, leaving only memories and posts behind. :p

You brought to light another side of the dice - children.
Even if marriage isn't "a weightbomb", children sure are.

Blargh ...... I disgress. :shakefist

Rampages
August 19, 2006, 05:40 PM
Don't mean to sound like the wet blanket brigade there :tem and certainly that is not everyone's story! Some people are perfectly happy never being married. But I'm just presenting the flip side to the 'freedom' of the single life, which often has an expiry date.


Wet blanket brigade ? How can I argue with that ? =P

I think some people want to stay single because they aren't 100% in love with their partner, or they just might be lazy and too busy with their lives like Kado said...well a lot of people want to get married too but can't because they don't find their lifelong partner...

LadyHatake
August 19, 2006, 06:42 PM
The other side of the coin to being single is that once you reach a certain age, being single is a very lonely existence. I know, because some of my friends who are now approaching their 40s and who put off marriage to concentrate on their careers, now cannot find anyone who they are compatible with (all the good one's are taken, they tell me) and long for companionship, nevermind love. All their friends are married with familes and have no time for them anymore, and they feel isolated and unloved.

This (for me) is a big fear. I don't want to live my whole life alone. I don't want to come home after work to a quit, empty house. I want someone there to welcome me home, and ask me how my day was, and I want to be able to do the same for someone else. If all of my friends were married, I know that they'd be with their families more often than not. I wouldn't want to be the one feeling left out and alone. But also, I don't want to be in a marriage where I'm unhappy or my partner's unhappy. Even if I'm only living with someone and am not married, I just don't want to be alone. I think that many people have this instinctive need to be with someone, and to just have someone backing them up unconditionally. Now, maybe I'm naive to believe this, but I do think that there is someone out there for everyone. It's just that you have to find them.

As far as people being too busy to love someone or be married, I think that if you truely love someone, you'll find a way to make it work. If not, you could be passing up something that's very important. Even if you are busy with your career, you should still let yourself have enough time to actually live your life.

But that's me ^^

Edit: Post # 600 ^^

Ichimaru Gin n Tonic
August 19, 2006, 10:44 PM
I don't want to come home after work to a quit, empty house. I want someone there to welcome me home, and ask me how my day was, and I want to be able to do the same for someone else. That's sounds like what i do almost everyday, good thing there's always my cats to greet me. :D



Now, maybe I'm naive to believe this, but I do think that there is someone out there for everyone. It's just that you have to find them.No you're not, i also think there's someone for everyone.



As far as people being too busy to love someone or be married, I think that if you truely love someone, you'll find a way to make it work. If not, you could be passing up something that's very important. Even if you are busy with your career, you should still let yourself have enough time to actually live your life.

But that's me ^^

Edit: Post # 600 ^^
I think this one is easier said then done. But if you are a very busy person and you can make time to be with your family or love ones, it'll really make a great difference in your life.

kadoman
August 21, 2006, 05:15 AM
But also, I don't want to be in a marriage where I'm unhappy or my partner's unhappy.

People often worry about this, but when you find someone you are compatible with, it honestly is something you never have to think about. The people I know who are in unhappy marriages, sadly, should never have married in the first place. But it's not as easy as it seems to make the correct decisions in life - in fact, it's one of the hardest things. Plus, people can change over time, for one reason or another. But generally, if a couple starts off harmoniously, and both people are reasonable people, they stay that way. When two difficult people get together, that's when you get tension.


As far as people being too busy to love someone or be married, I think that if you truely love someone, you'll find a way to make it work. If not, you could be passing up something that's very important. Even if you are busy with your career, you should still let yourself have enough time to actually live your life.

Asolutely agreed! And my poor friends have only realised this now, later in life! It's good you realise it early on! You sound worldly already Katy! :smile-big And you can find true love at any age! My hubby was your age (actually, a bit younger) when I met him and we've been together nearly 10 years now!

Leen
August 26, 2006, 04:15 AM
I don't know why buy maybe some people can really live as a hermit forever. Some people do like solitary life. And maybe some of these people are really happy to be alone. Why must when a person gets old without a partner, then they are called as "an old bookshelf??(Kado, right?)?? I don't like people have prejudices on people who don't get married and all that. That's not fair for them.

Why must we be married? Not trying to say that I'll remain single for the rest of my life, but I'm really glad to be alone right now, in real life that is, not e-life. I feel VERY happy being able to stay away from home, from every single people that I've ever known in my life. I don't have to worry about my actions here, I don't have to have any responsibilities towards them. I feel great staying alone in a whole empty apartment and for the past 17 years, I never have any intimate relationship with anyone. I like expiry date so that after that expiry date, I can move on. I don't want to drag something with me forever. >.> Marriage stops all that. Obligations come from your heart. If you can't even adhere to commitments all along your life, how can you be committed to your spouse? Can love really change everything?

Then again, I'm speaking from a 17-year-old teenager curious of adulthood. XD Points on marriage are great but at the end of the day, I still believe that it all comes down to a person's belief, preferences and interest. ;)

kadoman
August 26, 2006, 04:32 AM
I don't know why buy maybe some people can really live as a hermit forever. Some people do like solitary life. And maybe some of these people are really happy to be alone.

This is true, though, having said that, these people seem to form the minority in society.



Why must when a person gets old without a partner, then they are called as "an old bookshelf??(Kado, right?)??

Yeah, you got the gist of it Leen; people are said to be 'on the shelf', meaning they haven't been taken yet! :tem


Why must we be married?

I don't think we must be be married/live together. But I think there is something deep in our natures that compells us to seek out companionship. I have found, in my short experience of the world, that it is inevitable and that even people who resist the notion (as I once did) sooner or later, find themselves changing their minds.

I can't say why, but it seems to me that human beings can endure many hardships, but loneliness is something we cannot endure.


- snip - but I'm really glad to be alone right now, in real life that is,- snip -

Of course you are! :D You're still young and have much to do! Some people marry early. Some marry late. Some don't get married at all and just live together. And still some never find anyone, and while others are crushed by this, some are pleased. There is no hard and fast rule for everyone. But the majority of us eventually end up with someone.

And you change as you grow older too, and have more experiences in life - good and bad. I will tell you with certainty that how you think when you're 17 is vastly different to how you will think when you are 30. I'm expecting to think quite differently again when I'm 40. Oh, you're still relatively the same person (though not in my case, I'm vastly different for various reasons) but your opinion on things changes - I think that's that a good thing! It's how we develop as people!


Can love really change everything?

I never would have thought it possible but yes! it does! It really does. People who are in love will undego the most crazy personaltiy changes! :amuse And they will make the most uncharacteristic decisions - for better or for worse! It's really a powerful force, just like they say in the movies and manga! Everything you once thought just goes flying out the window when you're in love! :p It's a truly wonderful thing (except for when you lose it and then it became a truly painful thing! It's all part of life).

But you know, I'm just expressing my personal opinion from my own personal experience and that of my friends and family - and also, work collegues and people I have known or observed over the years and in different countries. Someone else might have an entirely different perspective based on their own experiences!

Rampages
August 27, 2006, 01:43 PM
I never would have thought it possible but yes! it does! It really does. People who are in love will undego the most crazy personaltiy changes! :amuse And they will make the most uncharacteristic decisions - for better or for worse!


So true...love is definitely a life-changing experience.

DesiSkull
August 31, 2006, 03:49 AM
hehe.. its true when you are in love, bunch of thing changes. some for good some for bad. it was said. Love is like Heaven but it can hurt like hell. most of us been there.
however we to put the effort to find the right one. and even if u find the right one outta nowhere. u have to put the effort in maintaining the the relationship. for right now. i prefer being single [besides im too young to get married now]. but as the life goes on i will like to get marry. i really want to know the joy of having kids, being with them, and living as a family one day.

cherryenchanted
March 22, 2007, 12:08 PM
Time can only tell, if to be a single or married...Since some events in life that you expect to happen may end up sometimes that you didn't expect to happen...

But I think being married would be more happier, since you had kids & as well as your partner...

As being single, could still be a happy life, but you can feel that loneliness...wishing you had someone that would take care of you and someone beside you, when getting old...

bakashijinsan
March 23, 2007, 01:46 AM
Single. And plan to stay that way for a few more years. Need to to do so much first before settling with a family.

ginousuke
March 23, 2007, 10:15 PM
Single also. Though some of my friends are married, but I'm not gonna rush myself. And I don't have any plan when I'm gonna get married. Depends on the situation. Depends whom I met.
It could be in 2 or 3 years. But who knows, maybe I meet someone tomorrow and get married next year :D
No problem. When the time comes, I'll figure it out myself.

Paper
March 23, 2007, 11:01 PM
single

my opinion:

being single is like being a mob boss out on the loose. you have access to all sorts o thrills and experiences, and you pay a few concequences if you've been out extorting people. being married however is like being a mob boss in prison. you alwasy reminisce about how good it was being free....

Nami
March 24, 2007, 04:26 AM
Prefabably single

- freedom
- not obligated to explain my actions to my partner
- if anything happens (e.g. partner or me cheats or whatsoever, it is much easier to change partners & move on with your life without the hassle of going through divorce- which is super messy and includes custody of children, spliitng of property, & wealth..traumatic & messy, just messy!)

but marriage is good
- if I have children - at least I know that they have a legal family identity (something like that)
- if i'm sure He's ThE ONE :)

LadyHatake
March 24, 2007, 05:35 AM
Prefabably single

- freedom
- not obligated to explain my actions to my partner
- if anything happens (e.g. partner or me cheats or whatsoever, it is much easier to change partners & move on with your life without the hassle of going through divorce- which is super messy and includes custody of children, spliitng of property, & wealth..traumatic & messy, just messy!)

but marriage is good
- if I have children - at least I know that they have a legal family identity (something like that)
- if i'm sure He's ThE ONE :)

I kind of feel the same, Nami. I know that I don't really want to get married until I'm 30 and have an established career and life. And I don't want to get married unless I'm absolutely sure that the guy is the one for me. I like being single because I can flirt around and have fun without worrying. Then again, I like being with a guy so that I can flirt around with him, too >.> But overall, single seems to work best for me xD I can spend time doing what I want and I don't have to worry about it affects my counterpart ^^

As far as children, I think that If/When I get married, I want three kids: 2 boys, and then a girl. That way the girl has two older brothers to look out for her ^^ But I just want kids when I'm older and I have a career that I can support them with. I won't have any children until I now that I have enough financial stability to be able to provide them with more than just the basics.

miyi
March 26, 2007, 07:39 PM
I actually used to believe in marriage, love at first sight, all that fantasy stuff. I changed my views a bit, and I'm no longer religious as I once was. Now I'm an atheist.

At least for me, marriage has a religious aspect to it.

If my girlfriend wants to be married, sure, I don't mind. But personally, I'm indifferent about marriage. For me it doesn't mean anything.

What I don't like about marriage is the idea of commitment. Why must I be restricted to just one partner? If the relationship doesn't work out, then it's reasonable to end the relationship and start new ones. Yes, it's true it sucks if you have children, but just because you're ending a commitment with someone doesn't necessarily mean you are less of a father as you once were. Of course you continue to fulfill your obligations as a father, which is to take care of them until they are an adult.

So for me, I don't mind getting married at all, but don't expect me to follow the rules and ethics of marriage since I don't believe in them.

Whether you are single or married, at least for me, it doesn't matter. What matters is whether you are happy. If you are single and not happy, then get a girlfriend. If you're married and not happy, then be single.

And if my girlfriend is as indifferent as I am towards the notion of marriage, then I don't mind staying un-married but continue to live with her, as if we were married. Why waste my money to celebrate something we both don't believe in, right?

And when you break off a relationship, I recommend not being a prick about it. It's not only you being affected, but your partner as well, so keep in mind of that.:D

Beam
March 27, 2007, 02:28 PM
Ive been single since the day i was born. Why? Well cuz thats how it is i guess

ILUVATAR
March 27, 2007, 05:02 PM
oh well, being single is fun that's for sure. doing anything you want without explanations etc. i am single and i intend to stay one for some more years. i am in the middle of a relationship with a girl right now but i don't think it will go too far.
being single has some fun in it but we have to remember that staying alone till the end isn't something funny. having someone by your side is a wonderfull thing. i have come to believe that in the whole world there is someone that suits us and we suit him. he/she is our other half, the one that will make us feal full and complete.
i had found that person once but i lost it. they took her away from me and i'll regret it for the rest of my life :wtf
stay single as long as you want and have fun, cause yes you can have lots of fun when you are single and do lots of crazy things. just don't forget that one day you might meet a special person and you will se how it is to feel complete. ^_^ don't pass by him/her. you'll regret it deeply believe me.

Singles
no commitments
few responsibilities
funny times were you might not have someone to share with
sad times were you won't have anyone to share ot talk to.

Married
many commitments and responsibilities
have someone by your side any time
funny and sad times were you'll have someone to support you or laugh with you
a bunch of kids to take care ^_^ tehehe

Azurel
March 31, 2007, 11:59 AM
If single means you can still live with your girlfriend/boyfriend, the question isn't single or married; rather it's married or cohabitation. The rate of marriages have been decreasing while cohabitation has become a growing trend.

Many many years ago, divorce was practically taboo but it became normal and thus, there was the divorce generation in which if your parents are not divorced, you are one of the few. I suppose the people of our generation no longer trust marriages because many of us are children of divorced parents or have seen the consequences of divorce from relative or friends who come from divorced family.

What's the point of marriage when you can happily live together unmarried? After all, marriage is just in name. I suppose when you are not married, it is easier to leave a relationship and move on, you won't feel the pressure to stay in a relationship that is not working. But honestly, life is unpredicatable. How do we know if he or she is the one? We don't. It's all about taking chances. Of course, we should choose life partners that are suitable for us in the first place or else your marriage won't last a month.

However, if we are discussing remaining single or getting married, honestly, I want to get married if I do find someone I love. When you grow old or when you're dying, you want to have your loved ones around. Being single is to have freedom and to have fun. But fun and friends don't last forever. At one point of time, your friends can't be there for you and then, you'd have no one else.

amar_kun
April 27, 2007, 07:01 AM
i wanna get married pretty much.. the prob is i just dont find the right person.. so for the time being, i have to stick to be a single..:wtf

by the way i found some pretty thoughful video concerning this issue on youtube.. you may wanna take look at this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsYOI1pDssI

seorang
April 27, 2007, 11:43 AM
Being married is like..... having a girlfriend for life!

woody_green
June 02, 2007, 09:05 PM
Single and proud! I don't wanna get married..

krazykone12
September 13, 2007, 12:32 PM
Marriage maybe when I'm 25 lol

Gold Knight
September 20, 2007, 01:42 AM
Hm, I'm kind of torn on this issue. Dependent to me. If you are with somebody and you are planning to have children, then might as well get married at some point - because it's just better for the kids, being in a good family makes them feel secure. If you are with somebody and you don't want to be parents, then it's really not that necessary. The only advantage to marriage as far as I can determine is that it officially labels your lover in society as YOUR lover. Period. XD (And even that's becoming less and less true these days, as affairs and divorces have been so common lately.)

Myself, I can go for marriage, but only if the person I am with wants it and if I really love her to the point where I believe I would be able to live with her the rest of my life, and especially if we're working on having some kids. But actually, having said that, I probably would just be as content NOT ever being married. But then, I'm a guy, and I don't really have jealousy issues. Guys do have an easier time as they get older at getting lovers than girls (lousy fact, but...)

Obxist
September 23, 2007, 03:19 AM
hello all i am single,.. and still not yet know what to do in the future, but i would love to have a kid,...



Myself, I can go for marriage, but only if the person I am with wants it and if I really love her to the point where I believe I would be able to live with her the rest of my life, and especially if we're working on having some kids. But actually, having said that, I probably would just be as content NOT ever being married. But then, I'm a guy, and I don't really have jealousy issues. Guys do have an easier time as they get older at getting lovers than girls (lousy fact, but...)

yeah the fact that guys will be still be popular is true,.. its somethings that only nature could explain >_>

CoyoteJack
October 04, 2007, 02:01 AM
I've been married for 6 years now (to genkigemini) and I can't imagine life any other way.

I used to always say that I'd never get married just because I'm so darn picky when it comes to being around people for prolonged periods of time. I can honestly say that I'm glad I was wrong. :D

I would never suggest someone rush into marriage though...you have to be sure about it. Too many couples push themselves into something and then regret it.

Gold Knight
October 04, 2007, 01:37 PM
That's cool CoyoteJack ^^ My parents have been married since they were 18 years old, for 42 years now, and they've had a very good time of it, so yeah, if you find the perfect partner, then life is definitely good... marriage or not. :amuse

I won't lie, I've always wanted to be a family man, so I probably WILL get married one day. I just have to meet the right person.

CoyoteJack
October 04, 2007, 03:57 PM
That's cool CoyoteJack ^^ My parents have been married since they were 18 years old, for 42 years now, and they've had a very good time of it, so yeah, if you find the perfect partner, then life is definitely good... marriage or not. :amuse

I won't lie, I've always wanted to be a family man, so I probably WILL get married one day. I just have to meet the right person.

My parents are the same way. My Mom was 15 (!) when she got married and they are married to this day (nearly 50 years) after having 5 children.

I'm all for living together first to make sure you know what you're getting into since it's always best to see a person at their best and worst (not just their best when you date). heh heh

Imperium
October 05, 2007, 02:09 AM
im single......................... but then again im only 16 and i actually heard somewhere that divorce rates are actually going up :oh

otakuami
October 23, 2007, 04:02 PM
I don't really agree with those pros & cons. I mean, while being single can be great because you don't have to worry about anybody else but your self, being married doesn't take away your freedom. It's the spouse that does it but if that's what you want that's ok, or you can get lucky and find somebody that doesn't bog you down. It's a given you don't get the total freedom as being single but you trade that for companionship. Marriage can be as great or greater then being single. I'd like to be married, I like the idea of having somebody worry about whether I come home or not.

Shojin
October 24, 2007, 02:56 PM
I'm single and enjoying it........ok not that much but its cool.

radical3113
October 26, 2007, 07:45 AM
im single and its good , i mean reeeeeely good but then again im only 20 my work is my life and i desperatly want a kid, but after going thru so many girls i often wonder if there are any good ones out there.............i havnt encountered any yet.

Bouland
October 29, 2007, 02:14 PM
24, single and planning on staying like this
too many anime / manga to watch, too many classes to level up in WOW (2- 70's, 2- 63's, 1- 40, alot of 20's 30's) too lil time :(

plus i hate resposibilities and dedicating time for a family, i rarely even see my own parents these days

at the end everyone has his own opinion

Zwivix
October 29, 2007, 03:50 PM
Wow, you guys are brining up threads that I didnt even notice.

Anyway I'm single and willing, I got my eyes on a girl right now, but we'll see how it goes.

Oh, by the way for all of you that knew that I had a girlfriend, well we broke up..:scry.

jim mayniam
October 31, 2007, 09:48 AM
divorced, actually...i feel that the institution of marriage is designed to fail; especially since these days its just another opportunity to quit something. it used to be frowned upon and almost unthinkable.

i could possibly just be a little bitter, though :p

MissYuki
June 28, 2009, 06:46 PM
I don't think I could ever be single for the rest of my life. I know there are cons for being married but I suppose once you find the one for you it wouldn't matter if you had a few doubts.

Onomatopoeia
June 30, 2009, 05:44 PM
Single.

I broke up with my girlfriend because I learned that I was moving out of the state. I'm not really good at long distance relationships.

- aMt -
July 01, 2009, 07:32 AM
"-no safety? Spouse might betray you" ._.

What it does not, just choose well.
Still there is little danger xD

--

I prefer getting married, it is projected as if you and your family when they die, their children are still alive, and led to his "seed ahead."

Googlez_kun
July 04, 2009, 05:16 PM
15 and single and it's good,because i can talk and flirt with every girl i want and that makes fun:D

and getting married with only 15...a bit too early i think^^

sindergi
July 04, 2009, 05:21 PM
single, never been married - just engaged

Kanako-chan
July 04, 2009, 06:09 PM
Single, still looking for the woman of my life.

Doragon
July 04, 2009, 06:16 PM
Single, because most broads here are dumb.

Mith252000
July 05, 2009, 07:31 AM
Hmm, single so far. Can't seem to find the right person. Oh, and I am 22.

blai
July 08, 2009, 06:23 AM
Dating, neither single nor together with someone, we'll see how it goes...

Prolly won't get married... but a steady relationship and kids aren't something I feel distant towards..

goldb
July 08, 2009, 09:09 AM
20 and single, not really looking for anything right now but let's see what appears

Grizz
July 09, 2009, 05:01 AM
Single, just having some fun for the meantime... you know just getting to know few... know what am sayin!!!!!

Black Lagoon
July 09, 2009, 08:21 AM
single, not really looking for anything right now but let's see what appears and just having fun for the meantime
Combination between @ Grizz and goldb @

Grizz
July 09, 2009, 08:28 AM
hahahah nice one BL.. when your single you might as well enjoy it while your at it, i think girls are so much trouble nowadays so, its best to take some time off and just consider other options, meaning other Hotties... know what am saying!!!

Black Lagoon
July 09, 2009, 08:40 AM
hahahah nice one BL.. when your single you might as well enjoy it while your at it, i think girls are so much trouble nowadays so, its best to take some time off and just consider other options, meaning other Hotties... know what am saying!!!

I know I know, as you said before let just have fun and enjoy life, moments and all that crap

Grizz
July 09, 2009, 08:47 AM
Single life is the best, especially when you go out clubbin and house parties.. you meet all these HOT girls...

Mugiwara_no_Jack
July 10, 2009, 01:28 AM
I know I know, as you said before let just have fun and enjoy life, moments and all that crap


Single life is the best, especially when you go out clubbin and house parties.. you meet all these HOT girls...

Quoted for truth.

Single, 22 years old and happy to be single.
I can get married when I am older ... enjoy the life as long as you're young and hot :D

Grizz
July 10, 2009, 01:47 AM
Quoted for truth.

Single, 22 years old and happy to be single.
I can get married when I am older ... enjoy the life as long as you're young and hot :D


Yea thats the spirit...

Mugiwara_no_Jack
July 10, 2009, 03:27 AM
Sounds a lil bit sarcastic xD

Grizz
July 10, 2009, 03:35 AM
No i didnt mean to sound sarcastic, but its true you need to enjoy life when your single because if you dont then by the time you get back into another relationship you'll be wishing you were single again.. and thats what i meant... we all have plenty of time to get married, i especially dont wana be stuck into some long relationship right now, then end marrying the girl and be miserable, i'd rather be single and explore other possibilities there is for me, besides there are so many potentials out there...

Black Lagoon
July 10, 2009, 09:16 AM
Quoted for truth.

Single, 22 years old and happy to be single.
I can get married when I am older ... enjoy the life as long as you're young and hot :D

yeah! a single man is like a bird flying in the horizon...
what i'm saying??
heat here is tremendous
I think it has affected me

Grizz
July 10, 2009, 09:22 AM
Affected youin what way??

Mugiwara_no_Jack
July 10, 2009, 09:36 AM
No i didnt mean to sound sarcastic, but its true you need to enjoy life when your single because if you dont then by the time you get back into another relationship you'll be wishing you were single again.. and thats what i meant... we all have plenty of time to get married, i especially dont wana be stuck into some long relationship right now, then end marrying the girl and be miserable, i'd rather be single and explore other possibilities there is for me, besides there are so many potentials out there...

Oh, OK my apologies I misunderstood that statement ^^

My statement before sound a little arrogant/cocky I guess ... Let me explain for all ^^
I don't want that I have to ask myself in the future if I missed something. So enjoy life and celebrate :)

Even if I would marry with 40 it'S enough time to get a fulfilled, long and good marriage. People get old, really old nowadays, there's plenty of time. It's not like I must be afraid of dying in my late 50's / early 60's. Not unusual to pass the 80's

Grizz
July 10, 2009, 02:05 PM
Oh, OK my apologies I misunderstood that statement ^^

My statement before sound a little arrogant/cocky I guess ... Let me explain for all ^^
I don't want that I have to ask myself in the future if I missed something. So enjoy life and celebrate :)

Even if I would marry with 40 it'S enough time to get a fulfilled, long and good marriage. People get old, really old nowadays, there's plenty of time. It's not like I must be afraid of dying in my late 50's / early 60's. Not unusual to pass the 80's


Yeah true true, you can stil married late and still be happy right, still a win win situation..

Kusachu
July 15, 2009, 02:20 AM
Well, I'm technically "single" since I'm not married, but I've been with the same person for 10 years. We just never got married, and I really don't even see the necessity of such a thing after so many years of monogamously living together. We don't have any kids yet so there hasn't really been a need to get married. It gets really fucking old when people ask us about it too. I like to say, "When we get tired of living in sin!"

I sort of have a grudge against marriages. They have absolutely nothing to do with love and everything to do with money it seems.

*shrug*

Mugiwara_no_Jack
July 15, 2009, 02:27 AM
Yeah true.
A marriage changes all.

Black Lagoon
July 15, 2009, 05:14 PM
but 10 years it's like you get married, and you think it would last longer??

Kusachu
July 15, 2009, 05:25 PM
but 10 years it's like you get married, and you think it would last longer??


Nope. It will either last until death or not either way. Though, we may marry for insurance purposes, and damn if that aint a shitty reason to get married! lol

I knew a guy who got married at 18, and I asked him why the hell he would do such a dumb thing, and he was all, "Well, we can always just get a divorce."

What kind of shit is that? All these homophobic people are putting up all this religious fuss about the sanctity of marriage and then what, like one in three marriages end in divorce? Where's the sanctity in THAT? Eff all that nonsense I say. :nod

Black Lagoon
July 15, 2009, 05:42 PM
and I knew one who got married at 14 and his wife was 9 years old! it sounds crazy but it's true, and if i'm not wrong they still married now for 50 years.

marriage become like a shitty step in life of most people, I hear that phrase a lot ("Well, we can always just get a divorce")...

:amuse

Kusachu
July 15, 2009, 11:15 PM
and I knew one who got married at 14 and his wife was 9 years old! it sounds crazy but it's true, and if i'm not wrong they still married now for 50 years.

marriage become like a shitty step in life of most people, I hear that phrase a lot ("Well, we can always just get a divorce")...

:amuse

Arranged marriage?? :blink I hope so. That's so, so wrong if it's not. If they aint old enough to bleed they certainly aint old enough to breed!! :o

Grizz
July 16, 2009, 04:31 AM
If my parents ever arranged a marriage for me without me knowing how the woman looks like or never seen her. i would curse them.. thats a bad thing to do..

Essence
July 17, 2009, 10:07 AM
Well i'm not particular excited for marriage, i want to date as much as I can and not be tie down by marriage and commitment to one girl. Besides marriage Really dont improve relationship in fact it can be boring at times. BUt anyway eventually whenever i reach an age like 40, i will settle down with a girl wether we marry or not. But for now i'm not even 18 yet so I got a long time on my hand before i ever reach 40, so i intend to be a flirt and player right now and not take my relationship that serious

sandrias
July 18, 2009, 01:03 PM
yes it right you dont need to merry someone but in my religion you cant life with the person together without a marriage

Kusachu
July 25, 2009, 04:04 AM
yes it right you dont need to merry someone but in my religion you cant life with the person together without a marriage

That's true of many religions, but has grown pretty lax over the years as many people are becoming lenient with religious beliefs, especially in the U.S., where many often claim a certain faith, but do not practice. Even my parents' generation used to turn their noses up at people who had sex out of wedlock, but it's so commonplace nowadays that marriage as an institution is something that is practically becoming outdated.

My boyfriend's mother was very clear that she thought he and I should live together for a while before we got married. That was when we were teenagers. But she is also a woman who was divorced from his father and had raised him on her own. So from her perspective, for us to be sure we were compatible was a wiser option than hastily getting married (and possibly having kids) and then finding out we didn't like each other that much.

HellooXD
August 17, 2009, 02:54 PM
I am still going to school, i single i have more freedom :)

Rei ~♥
August 18, 2009, 04:13 AM
I'm single. Done in College.
Better to have a stable career first before getting married.

Metal D. Reaper
August 19, 2009, 12:17 PM
still on high school and single but hoping not for too long lol :D

Moogle Mango
August 22, 2009, 11:23 AM
Single for now. It's slightly easier traveling being single. :p

igotthegoods
August 30, 2009, 11:06 PM
I just want to remind everybody here that the topic of the thread is not whether or not you are single or married. It is about whether you prefer to be single or married. Please don't simply declare your marital status. Tell us why it's great or why it's... not so great. ;)



Just to add on, those posts above with just 'single' has been removed.

Yuki_Judai
August 31, 2009, 12:40 AM
I'm still single because i'm still in high school ^^

~Brianma~
September 30, 2009, 06:37 AM
I am still single......


Dunno why.....maybe I am kinda shabby or mellow?..And any tips for me to be more successful with girls?

pirateninjahunter
October 07, 2009, 08:08 PM
I have a gf.


I am still single......


Dunno why.....maybe I am kinda shabby or mellow?..And any tips for me to be more successful with girls?

Try have many girls as friends. Then, tell them that you would like their help finding a gf.

Bugzee
October 09, 2009, 04:37 PM
I'm single. Done in College.
Better to have a stable career first before getting married.

Co-sign!!!

Tip: its much better being single when entering Uni then being in a relationship!!! TEMPTATIONS!!!!!!!!!

Anyarel
October 09, 2009, 05:13 PM
I'm just 19, I wouldn't like to be married now.
But I'd like to have a boyfriend, I never had a boyfriend for more than 3 months. =(

Sεn
October 10, 2009, 03:12 AM
Single, although ideally I'll get married once I meet the right person and I'm done with school.

dpsoul
November 07, 2009, 11:58 AM
I'm enjoying single-blessedness ^-^(well, i'm only 15 so what do you expect, hihi)Anyways, about marriage, hmm, i've never really thought about it. I'm neutral about the topic, it's okay to be single all my life and it's also okay for me to get wed, well, uhm, i'll just cross the bridge when I get there:D
Erm, well, if I'll get married, I'll make sure first that I'm stable/successful in my chosen career:D
If I'm gonna enjoy single-blessedness, then hello foundations,donations and scholarship grants^-^ I'll help many people and at the same time make more money for myself(legally and in good ways)

DARK
November 11, 2009, 07:46 PM
Single, because as a young adult I want to get my life settled before I get hitched.

bakagemi
December 01, 2009, 09:15 PM
I'd very much rather be single, because if you're single, you'd have less of a chance of someone dragging you down in your life. Also, you get more FREEDOM, and for countless people (not me), they get to flirt with as much people they like, without someone screaming at them in jealousy. See the benefits of being single, people with boyfriends/girlfriends and married peeps?

Paper
December 05, 2009, 11:33 PM
Single. Why? Because I value my freedom, plus I'd rather stay single than pay an insanely large amount of money for a divorce in the future. I don't really get along with people in general; people find me too frank, apathetic, and stern to deal with so I'm only able to keep friends who share the same sentiments. Women don't normally respond to my type positively since we're just seen as walking computers, and that's not exactly a bad thing by my book. Better to stay the way I am and be productive/efficient in my field than be a useless prick, tied down to a family that holds you back.

Yusaku Jon 3
December 24, 2009, 06:33 AM
Single. There really hasn't been that much to interest me about women personally since I feel like I'm financially unready and have some pretty stringent standards as to what kind of woman I'd want to be dating or married to. I had a few crushes in my youth, but lost the opportunity to follow up on them before they flitted away.

soDeq05
December 31, 2009, 06:50 PM
Single. I am going to get married when I'm 23
XD

Eternal
January 02, 2010, 11:12 PM
I'd prefer staying single until I'm finished with anything relating to school, studying, and finding a job. Then I'll consider who to get with.

bakagemi
January 03, 2010, 03:53 AM
I'm not thinking about marriage or getting together at all. I think it's a big waste of time. My thoughts only, though, so no offense anyone.

Ascension
January 06, 2010, 06:07 PM
I would like to marry my girlfriend in approximately a year or two. Did the superficial single fling thing for about 4 years. It was fun. Then found a great match. Couldn't be happier.

bakagemi
January 07, 2010, 12:27 AM
Wow...you sound real happy with your girl. Best of luck to you, man.

Xadyu
February 01, 2010, 08:51 PM
I'm currently single, somewhere at the end of this month I'm officially single for 2 years.

I've had crushes in that time, but nothing to serious, most of the girls I didn't even know. I'm not looking for a girlfriend at the time either, I'm not interested, mainly because I couldn't care less and because my life's kind of a mess now, I couldn't handle a girlfriend even if I got one, lol.

I'm not planning on marrying, never, I don't see why people should marry. It's all phony if you ask me.

megadud20
March 25, 2010, 11:35 AM
I wouldn't mind ending up single as long as I can be more adventurous and take advantage of things like traveling (which is hard to when settled down). I can take my time. I'm happy being single. People often think that I'll never find the person for me because my problem is that I am very picky of whom I want to spend the rest of my life with.

I want to make make sure I end up with the best possible wife EVER so that my babies will be very damn awesome in every way.
Hormone-wise, I have good control, so I think being seduced or forced into marriage, or ending up with someone of poor quality is something that wont work on me (or isn't likely to happen). I'm 21, very independent, and always working towards improvement.
Now here's the kicker: as a person who is always looking to improve, I would require my future spouse to do the same... This means she has to at least try being athletic in some way instead of being a fatty. The reason for this is more than just external; it shows uncommon traits that she is not willing to let comfort sabotage her reality (by becoming fat). I personally see this trait useful in many ways, because I can learn from her, and she can learn from me. In other words, I look for internal quality that'll transcend into the external. I won't settle for less.

My belief is that in improving myself up to a certain point, I'll be able to deserve (or attract?) someone with similar values who wouldn't settle for a different guy who doesn't have those values.

Does anyone here think the same way as I do? How about the opposite? I'd like to hear what you think.

Sakatsu
March 31, 2010, 04:18 PM
Eh, there is still too many downsides to being married for myself. I will remain unmarried as long as I want to.


Although I do like the financial stability thing, its pretty hard living with one income with a comfortable place where I live so having two combined incomes opens a lot of opportunities.

nanaDmari
April 01, 2010, 09:32 PM
Oh, my... I'm just too young to be married!
So... I'm single... enjoying my life...

and when I took the psychological test for my driver's license the guy said I was too demanding and rigorous... so maybe that's the real reason why I'm single XD

I'm also in favor of the financial stability before marriage...

shaheer
April 02, 2010, 08:59 AM
single , actually i dont even have time to find some one for me, studying engg is too hard, the free time i get i pass it leisurely, like sleeping or sitting in front of my Pc

DLord.Van.Buuren
April 02, 2010, 05:29 PM
through my observation generally most members are less than 25 years old i believe that none of them is married . well if anyone here is married then have all the good luck because you'll need it .

megadud20
April 19, 2010, 11:00 PM
single , actually i dont even have time to find some one for me, studying engg is too hard, the free time i get i pass it leisurely, like sleeping or sitting in front of my Pc

Story of my life
[hr]
I believe it's good that some of you are deciding until accomplishing things like finishing school, etc before settling down. Many of my friends who have gotten married before age 25, have a pretty hard time living together because of small imperfections that every young adult has. (Like not knowing how to cook, lack of money, immaturity, ect...)
Don't get me wrong, there are some cases where this is an exception, or where it can be beneficial for the couple (like a shotgun wedding). Pretty much, what I'm trying to say is don't rush things. Take time to enjoy things you wont be able to do later on (like school).
Nothing good can ever come out of marrying before your time.

But then again, what do I know? I'm just pro single...

alice&uncas
November 27, 2010, 03:34 PM
Single because I just love being single, I don't like being tie down, too much drama in my life, and trying to accmpolish more important things in my life.

steelwingcrash1
February 07, 2011, 08:23 AM
I plan to get married by 28 or 29. By then, I already have saved enough for financial needs.

Of course I want to get married. I need someone to take care of me when I get old.

Roflkopt3r
February 08, 2011, 04:25 PM
I plan to get married by 28 or 29. By then, I already have saved enough for financial needs.

Of course I want to get married. I need someone to take care of me when I get old.

I'm a single and I could never just say "I'll get married at age X". It's way too dependend on finding the right partner after all...
Given I'm sure I found "her", I'ld probably agree on marriage after I'm done studying, which probably will be in approx. 5-6 years (as I'll only begin this summer).
Not right after graduation, but after having found a first job and getting accustomed to it a little.

Well, as I said, it's not something I could really plan for so early in advance.


Single because I just love being single, I don't like being tie down, too much drama in my life, and trying to accmpolish more important things in my life.
More important? Sometimes I feel like I'm the last optimistic/idealistic person left on this planet, especially after reading such a post from a woman :(

steelwingcrash1
February 10, 2011, 08:33 AM
When I'm already attached to someone for long, as a man, it's only proper for me to plan things out for the both of us.

I should have plans, as to when we should get married. Of course, this is only tentative for us.

Mama Satsuki
February 15, 2011, 01:00 PM
I am currently single, not saying for how long (but it's been a while...), but want to marry.

I'm a sort of religious person (enough to believe in God and want a religious marriage, but no so much as to say Pokémon is devil stuff), so I wouldn't be able to be with someone without doing it so properly.

Marriage, for me, isn't just promising in front of everyone "to love you forever, till death do us apart". It is more like getting permission from God to be with someone I like. Hehe, like a song of Rurouni Kenshin "God doesn't forbid anything at all" (1/2, 2nd opening theme), so of course He would agree.

It is more like pleasing your father, showing him that you do, indeed, love this person and want to spend the rest of your life with them. If you ever agree with marrying someone, it should be for love; and if you love someone, why would you think that having them by your side forever is a bad thing? People who ever divorced, never loved equally in the first place. So marriage isn't something wrong in itself, it's what people make of it.

I want all that stuff people complain about marriage, about not having free weekends or having to wake up extra early just to get everything ready for someone else's breakfast.

Because, sincerely, waking up to no one in particular is rather sad.

Sure, I want to enjoy while I am young. Have fun, meet people. But it's not like marriage would hold me from doing any of that. Unless I marry some weirdo...

Lastly, I am a human specimen of the female variation... So, time is really an issue. I want to have children, so marrying after 30 is a big no-no.

Since, you know, I can't have kids before marriage. Not because of what everyone else says about being a slut or whatever (heck, they couldn't care less about this), but because... you know... there's also all that chastity stuff to go along -_-;...

shaheer
February 16, 2011, 01:26 AM
thought i needed to divulge my pos a bit after i gave a 2 liner few days ago.:)
i am 21 single(ya no gf :scry) well basically i am a chaste and i have responsibilities to bear
i am a Muslim so relations outside marriage pertaining to a deeper stay together is sth that i dont have in my mind.
so marriage or any thing physical yet single, doenst seem to be a near even in my life .

I am more into my work though, i am studying and i will try to aim for a PhD and a post PhD if every thing (from monetary to other probs dun show up) so thats another reason that i will be facing a fallow.
Though i dont know for sure, as my parents are more concerned about my social life than my post M engg life(i mean they want me to do M engg, B engg is a no go they say, and i kind a have the same sentiments)
and i do try to listen to their council.
So i am basically in a dilemma, not that its like every day i get up and count the leaves or matchsticks with a " will marry"," wont marry" lol am not that desperate to crack it. So far these things dont seem to be in friction as i am still doing my B engg, so i ll let that worry of till later :)
but one thing is for certain, it will be marry but not now(if i am not harangued lol, or change my mind)

steelwingcrash1
February 16, 2011, 07:44 AM
It would be sad for a guy not to marry. I mean we are all looking for life partners, aren't we?

Roflkopt3r
February 16, 2011, 03:50 PM
I'm a sort of religious person (enough to believe in God and want a religious marriage, but no so much as to say Pokémon is devil stuff), so I wouldn't be able to be with someone without doing it so properly.


That's sad to hear... uhm, not because I'ld want to marry you, but I think that personal affection is much more important than religious beliefs.
What's about someone who's certain in his atheism but a great person otherwise? Or, someone who is a believer, too, but for a different religion and thus wouldn't want to marry in a specifically christian wedding?

lawlett-kun
February 17, 2011, 01:32 AM
single.Extremely not popular(bad looks).ad very sad story.depressed.

XxLawlieTxX
February 17, 2011, 02:52 AM
Single- no particular reason why, not all that popular, a lot of people like me.
Online or not I can't find the one :/ sorta sucks yeah.

But I'm getting used to being alone n depressed (it's so lame but it's so true_)

shaheer
February 17, 2011, 03:16 AM
uhm, not because I'ld want to marry you, but I think that personal affection is much more important than religious beliefs.
well religious adherence also falls under personal feelings now doenst it. I dont see any problems to that, if some one wants to be a religious follower and does what he/she wants to do including abiding the marriage criterion i dont think any one in a liberal society should have any sort of objection to it
for example i am a religious follower, and my religion do accept having a muslim / christian /jew as a bride
but makes it clear that marrying a muslima is better. now its wholly my choice whether i should go by my religion or not go by my religion. because a girl that i want to choose as my life partner should have some basic things in common and religion being a mandatory one (for me)
if i am a muslim and my wife is atheist(for example) i would have some basic religious performance and prayers and dates and days and what not, in which her support is sth that i would definitely want
(just a rash example)like in Ramadan we need to fast, and take early meal (before dawn) i would expect my wife to help me (or vice versa) to prepare that and if i am late and dun get up and she did then wake me up etc, now i dont see how she can ever respect m y way of life to a degree to invigorate me to do things(which i consider mandatory in my religion) if i am forgetful. A family is a unit it should have wheels of similar nature
not one a car wheel and other a bus

if its my life i want to do what ever i want, then it should go both way religious and non religious

Mama Satsuki
February 17, 2011, 04:31 AM
That's sad to hear... uhm, not because I'ld want to marry you, but I think that personal affection is much more important than religious beliefs.
What's about someone who's certain in his atheism but a great person otherwise? Or, someone who is a believer, too, but for a different religion and thus wouldn't want to marry in a specifically christian wedding?

Well, for me at least, the only thing my decision would keep me from doing is showing "physical affection"; I can love, just not make it physical, if you know what I mean :hurr As far as love goes, it's not about lust.

As for different religions, I (me, not my church) don't think the God I believe in would blame me for doing two ceremonies in my marriage, or letting me convert to something else. I have this thing going on my head that everyone worships the same god/gods, and just give them different names :p As long as I don't have to start sacrificing lambs, I'm okay with it. It wasn't God, nor the church that made up wedding. It existed even before Christianism was invented. Adam and Eve didn't marry. The Hebrews were polygamous and had relationship with their slaves!

As for the atheist, it is not asked to believe in God to marry. It is just a contract bounding two people together. I am going for the chastity stuff because I don't want to just go handing myself away to someone who won't hold me forever. It is one of my last virtues (:p), and I don't want to simply give it away just for a few years of pleasure and nothing more but nice memories.

Now, if my significant other didn't want to marry under God (that means: in a church), whichever god it may be, that would be an issue. That, or he'd have to go his whole life without getting some horizontal tango with me :3c... but it wouldn't mean not liking him, or kissing and hugging. He just wouldn't be going for the full contract.

I just don't think sex is the only way to show affection. Or else I'd have a big incestuous family right now, with pets included :blink

Queenofmuffins
February 18, 2011, 07:47 AM
I am single, have been for a long time (excepting once or twice over the last few years) and plan on staying that way.

rudorofu
January 29, 2012, 05:52 PM
I'm pretty typical and traditional in terms of being a girl where they dream of having a husband, family and being fortunate with the things they have; yup, that would be me. Being single does have its pros like the amount of freedom you have in terms of your social life, especially with people of the opposite sex. Even so, I'd like to settle down and be married to one person even if, yes, it does mean being committed and having to spend the rest of my life with them. There are things that I've learned about the cons of being single, from my parents. When I think about it, it would be sad to die alone. That doesn't mean there wouldn't be anybody who cares about you, it's just that you don't have a significant other alongside you during your final moments which when I think about it, is quite depressing. So in short, I would definitely like to be married in the future.

Naomidee
February 07, 2012, 12:11 AM
I'm single. Not only do I want to be single, but I think I need to be. At this point in my life, I can't even imagine being married let alone having a serious boyfriend.

If I were to get married in the future, it wouldn't be until my very late twenties I think. Hard to tell when I haven't even daydreamed about that shit since I was maybe 16. XD Not with true longing or intent anyway.

M3J
February 07, 2012, 12:24 AM
Single because I like freedom, am shy around women, and just because it's financially better.