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Translations: Gintama 507 (2)
I am currently writing a story/script but I don't have any idea what I should name it so if possible can anybody read over the short story I put, please give me any of your thoughts.
Anything that comes to mind is fine even if its one word. Feel free to judge it to. Anything helps.
The time period is during the Victorian era.
A boy by the name of Veles who is seventeen is slowly watching his hometown fall apart due to the lack of income his hometown has. One day his best friend Ira tells Veles that they should leave home to find a better life. There will be nothing here for us in the future if we stay Ira says but Veles believes their is a way to save his beloved hometown but he doesn't understand how it can be done. His parents understand that if he stays here he wont have a future so they tell him its best if he leaves to start a new life somewhere away from his home. Just as planned he leaves home and heads toward a large city named Rivington with two friends. His adventure begins finding out there is more than just life outside his small hometown which he has left. He finds out there are many cities and towns just like his however a dark shadow has appeared over the past fifteen years causing only the large cities to still stand while the small towns have fallen apart. Being told by a noble himself he finds out that the Noble families of each city are also the cities loyal protectors each given a mythical creature to perish any evil that threatens their home. Veles finds out he to is a noble from his hometown by the birthmark on his chest he is given the mythical creature, the dragon. What awaits Veles and his friends on their journey, what is this evil, and is it the only thing to fear in this dark time.
Thank you for your time.
I would go for main char name, "Veles". But you as the author know more details on the story more than i do
you seem like your trying to create a story that feels cryptic and covered in secrets. you could simply name it something just as cryptic and it will set the stage for your story that way the readers already start to feel like asking questions as they open the book and begin reading. im not sure what you mean by shadow but im inclined to think that its some sort of force that causes all but the strongest towns to come to ruin. if thats correct why not name it something that describes the danger? maybe something along the lines of "Shadow of destruction" or even "dark crusade"
hope that helps at all