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Thread: Since I'm not popular, I will try to smile at my own

  1. #166
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuteiken View Post
    Hm, it must be falling from the stairs in the kindergarten.
    Some monumentally long text I wrote to explain my feelings to my former crush also has been exciting to prepare. Pity it's not in English or I would share it here, since it's my masterpiece!
    I remember doing something similar when I was in high school. I sat at the dining room table to write this, it was taking me a while to organise my thoughts. Next thing I know, my mum comes in, takes the paper from me. She read it and told me it's not the way to go and that I should find the courage to tell my crush face to face. I contemplated her advice and ultimately chose to listen. Shame the feelings weren't reciprocated but I felt it was a valuable lesson.

  2. #167
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by goldb View Post
    I remember doing something similar when I was in high school. I sat at the dining room table to write this, it was taking me a while to organise my thoughts. Next thing I know, my mum comes in, takes the paper from me. She read it and told me it's not the way to go and that I should find the courage to tell my crush face to face. I contemplated her advice and ultimately chose to listen. Shame the feelings weren't reciprocated but I felt it was a valuable lesson.
    I wrote that thing on our school forum we both regularly checked in. There wasn't her name there, nor there was any mentioning of a love feeling. Not even an interest of a girl
    Told her that I wrote something specially for her and she read. And she got the message.
    No, she wasn't a genius. She probably already knew it from my demeanor up to that point. In fact, reading that countless times later on, I'm pretty sure she didn't understand one word out of it.

  3. #168
    MangaHelper 有名人 / Yuumeijin / Celebrity yukihime03's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuteiken View Post
    *Stops being modest.
    It has been a while since I last received such insight from an outsider. Not seeing my dearest friends hasn't helped my case, I guess.
    If it's that sort of routine, you might be clinging to whatever you have in life rather than whatever resides in your mind. Could either be a good thing or a bad one, tough call. Like good cop and bad cop. Mind always plays the demon role, due to the reason it doesn't give you a rest. Life consumes you within its flow and until you react, you can't even think of anything.
    I'll probably awaken the demon at some point again, it's that thing's nature. After that, it's all about "life-changing" conclusions I will arrive at as it was once. You will probably find those you look for in your mind very soon and replace them through time with new ones. That's the cycle of life for you
    Ah.. there's a reason I don't let this demon go out... The results have always been disastrous. I know I can't restrain forever, at least once a year I would have let it go, but if I can, I will control when and where it will go out.
    And about me clinging to what I have in life, it might be true. I've contemplating about this for a while now and I know I'm like this for a reason. It's hard to change this part of me though, since it's born out of years of painful experiences. One can't just forget and go on so easily.

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  5. #169
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by yukihime03 View Post
    Ah.. there's a reason I don't let this demon go out... The results have always been disastrous. I know I can't restrain forever, at least once a year I would have let it go, but if I can, I will control when and where it will go out.
    And about me clinging to what I have in life, it might be true. I've contemplating about this for a while now and I know I'm like this for a reason. It's hard to change this part of me though, since it's born out of years of painful experiences. One can't just forget and go on so easily.
    That's true, but that reaches a point where you can't fend off it anymore and there are no other moves to play with. Unleashing it on your own generally gives you the best result in terms of social relationships, but it hurts you much more that way since you bear all the pain yourself.
    I've come to think perhaps it needs to stay that way. One can try to give shape to the soul the way he/she feels like the best, but then, it wouldn't be considered a product of his/her nature anymore, so, can't have it both ways. Hopefully, if it's a hindrance, it will just crumble away by time.
    As the word suggests, this requires hope and faith in the destiny. The more suffering you go through, the more fragile that faith gets. The less ambitions you carry on, the less hope you will feel. Knowing this doesn't really make things easier, but it helps to at least keep some sort of vital patience.

  6. #170
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuteiken View Post
    I wrote that thing on our school forum we both regularly checked in. There wasn't her name there, nor there was any mentioning of a love feeling. Not even an interest of a girl
    Told her that I wrote something specially for her and she read. And she got the message.
    No, she wasn't a genius. She probably already knew it from my demeanor up to that point. In fact, reading that countless times later on, I'm pretty sure she didn't understand one word out of it.
    Must've been a masterpiece if there was no mention of feelings, names, gender, or anything of the sort. What was her reaction?

  7. #171
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by goldb View Post
    Must've been a masterpiece if there was no mention of feelings, names, gender, or anything of the sort. What was her reaction?
    At first, she asked me what I meant explicitly for a confirmation. Upon hearing it, she denied the possibility, then, a few days later, sort of accused me of failing to understand her feelings. So, we dated for a while on paper (since we never did anything noteworthy, it was just on paper for me), she came to detest my writing style as I kept writing few pieces for her and ended the so-called relationship.
    It was my fault to try getting into something with such a childish girl to begin with.

    Edit: Oops, just realized how filthy doing nothing noteworthy could sound
    I mean, we didn't even go watch a movie together, yet, we were apparently in a relationship. But telling about that to anyone was also forbidden by her request
    Last edited by Hakuteiken; February 01, 2013 at 02:17 PM.

  8. #172
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    So she was trying to deflect everything on you and making you feel bad for admitting your feelings? that's shitty.

    That's not a relationship, you didn't even hangout, as you've pointed out. It's a shame, her loss I guess.

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  10. #173
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    And her reason to break-up was exactly the fact that we were doing nothing together, when she wasn't willing to do anything with me at all
    I don't know. I lost quite a bit of time thinking about all that. It was standing on my way. Fortunately, it's all history now. Might give me a permanent headache with girls, though. I was already not doing a fine job in the first place

  11. #174
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Don't let that one experience ruin or get in the way of your pursuing other women in the future. Sounds like it was a real waste of your time there. As for being girls in general, it's something you just get used to; gotta get used to talking to them first.

  12. #175
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    That's a bit tough, since there are no common interests to begin with, between me and girls, I mean
    Not that it's impossible, but I seem to have lost the whole tiny amount of youngster motivation I had with that, that's what makes me a bit worried

  13. #176
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuteiken View Post
    That's a bit tough, since there are no common interests to begin with, between me and girls, I mean
    Not that it's impossible, but I seem to have lost the whole tiny amount of youngster motivation I had with that, that's what makes me a bit worried
    Don't rush it, no hurry. Just get comfortable talking and interacting, then that feeling in your nether regions will come back . How can you lose your youngster motivation? YOUTH!

  14. #177
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    Quote Originally Posted by goldb View Post
    Don't rush it, no hurry. Just get comfortable talking and interacting, then that feeling in your nether regions will come back . How can you lose your youngster motivation? YOUTH!
    Cause it was very weak to begin with Interaction was on a pretty low-level.
    Spoiler show

    I really need a Gai now

  15. #178
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    dude that's pretty bad, aren't there any in your classes?

  16. #179
    MangaHelper MH中毒 / MH Chuudoku / MH Addicted Hakuteiken's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    What classes? They are all finished, except the graduation project, which I'm doing on my own.
    Times of solitude..

  17. #180
    Bobbas Veltez 伝説メンバー / Densetsu / Legendary Member goldb's Avatar
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    Re: A very cool thread title about myself

    So you don't go out to bars or anything like that?

    Well I guess you'll have time to do so afterwards...

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