Gintama 277

Locked and loaded! Thank Kewl though, it was his edits that really saved the day ^^. Perhaps he should just do this instead :-P

....Who ever came up with the phrase 'don't trust Whitey' must be feeling pretty foolish about now....


(Sfx- Kshaaaaaa hisssssss)

(Sfx- Gari gari gari grind gnnd grnnnd)

(Sfx- Nigyaaaaa)

(Side text- Course, he loves cats!)

Katsuo: Sorry b'out them country folk havin' no manners..

Guess us up in tha city, and them back in the country are lil' different.

Every one of em's making an ill natured face.

That's why Ah'm a dog person rather than be up with them cats.

Dogs are honest and loyal. They look you in the eye, and don't spec' no handouts.

But ya'll, man ya'll don't want to start a decent relationship no how. Soon as things look better with someone else, ya'll gone.

I can't reckon what ya'll be thinkin' 'bout at all. Ya'll some scary creatures like that.

???: Katsuo-dono....

Are you sure that,

You should have such a conversation when in our presence?

(Bottom text- Volume 30 is now out in stores!!)

(Sfx- Kohon cough)

Katsuo: Mah bad there.

I ain't mean no harm or nothin' But cha know that my little Mel-chan is the cutest of them all.

002

Catman: It seems that most of the cats in this city originated from the countryside.

They'll make excellent raw materials.

We can probably raise the price on them by 20 percent with a shipment like this.

Kastuo: No foolin?

If that's the case, we'll get to catchin' more of these critters nonstop.

These guys got no owners, since they're just country strays.

Lotta people are real happy about this, while ain't no one making a fuss.

To think that they's the one who helped us get this far...

Anyway, I doubt they care too much about what we're doin down here.

We ain't got much funds comin' in other than this...

So we'll make a clean sweep of the city, and get that fat paycheck.

Catman: Where there is a black cat, there is bad luck, which is why they're disliked as they are.

However without bad luck there's no good luck.

Whether it's the messenger of the devil, or one of god,

Cats are at the center of both pathos, and are important living creatures.

You may view them as mere hindrances,

But to us, these cats are,

The messiahs that will save our planet.

We can't do anything flashy,

Can we work together from here for the sake of my planet?

003

(Sfx- Patan slam)

Gangster: Boss, what did you negotiate with him?

Katsuo: What's he talkin' bout a 'messaiah' for?

They just some horrible little critters, them cats.

(Sfx- Burooooo frooooom)

(Sfx- gataan Clatter)

(Sfx- Nyuuuu glaaare)

(Side text- The duo looks for Gin-san, who has become a cat....)


GINTAMA
Lesson 277: Living freely isn't crazy, it's just by your own rules.
SORACHI HIDEAKI

004

Cat: Hey did you hear the update on the balls situation?

It seems like they're not only after our balls, but a few who were taken were also never brought back.

Most likely the humans got hold of them.

Yeah Tagosaku and Gorou haven't returned.

There's a rumor about. If you're caught they not only take your balls, but your soul too.

You'll hear all about it if you step into town. Everyone's talking.

Speaking of which, I haven't seen Whitey around much, could it be...

Of course not.

He's just out with the newbie again.

You mean THAT newbie?

Man, something major must have happened to get Whitey off of his tyrant complex.

(Handwritten- You idiot! Use your full strength to kill it!)

I guess it can't be helped, someone has to teach him how to hunt...but it is surprising that Whitey's been out doing it every day.

He controls us with his strength, he's used it well, that tyrant...

(Sfx- Futagyaaaaaaa!)

Cat: Hey, he's not bad. That Gin guy's pretty skilled.

He's already tough, but if he and Whitey team up, we won't stand a chance.

005

Cat: I'd be good if they got caught...

Think about it....if that tyrant got caught,

We'd be free right?

Whitey: I guess that's all we can do for today.

No matter how much I hammer into you, nothing seems to come of it. If this keeps up, you're not long for this world.

(Sfx Hah hah hah)

Gintoki: Of course I'm no good at hunting!!

I'm much better when it comes to being a lover dammit! I can't just kill something and eat it like YOU!

How many times do I have to tell you that I was born HUMAN dumbass?!

You guys can chime in with me any time now!

Katsura:Whitey-dono! Would you like some salt? Or some ranch dipping sauce? Oh, and Gintoki, what would you like!?

Gintoki: Oh, salt's cool.

THE HELL?! HOW DID YOU GUYS CATCH ON SO QUICKLY?!

Whitey: Seems like they've got more talent for living out in the country than you do Gin.

Gintoki: And in WHAT WORLD DO CATS EAT AROUND BONFIRES?!

Kondo: Hey Yorozuya, come on over. We can all eat in front of the campfire.

Gintoki: I'll join, after you jump in and become ash!!

006

Gintoki: I'm so hungry that I can't sleep....

I dunno how long I can put up with this kind of life....

Will I ever go back to being myself again....?

I wonder what Shinpachi and Kagura are doing?

Whitey: I hate guys who whine too damn much.

Gin...

You're never going to become human again.

Gintoki: Geh. I didn't think anyone was listening to what I was saying...

Do you really believe this stupid ass scenario I'm in?

Whitey: If I DIDN'T believe in you, why would I waste my valuable time coaching you failures?

You know you should probably listen to anyone willing to give you advice. Especially those who have been through the same ordeal.

Gintoki: Wait....are you....

Whitey: About time you caught on.

Gintoki: N---no---no way...

007

Gintoki: You're.....

Actually Doraemo....

Whitey: NO JACKASS!!

The HELL is wrong with you?! For WHAT reason would Doraemon even be involved in this story?!

Gintoki: Well...I mean, he is a robotic cat from the future, and you have no ears just like him...they were bitten off by mice right?

Whitey: Where did you get such an outrageous story?! Do I LOOK like I have a four dimensional pocket full of goodies for you?!

(TN- Doraemon. Google it. :-P There's not enough time in the world for me to really discuss it here. Think Japanese equivalent to Mickey Mouse, only slightly more active.)

Gintoki: You're not Doraemon? Damn. Uh...then you have to be....uh..

Paamyeown?

Whitey: PAAMAN?! Are you calling me PAAMAN?! Why the hell would you bring up these cartoon characters in a situation like this?! Are you some type of chimpanzee?!

(TN- Same author as Doraemon, but this one is about Superman's assistant. Drop the SU and you get PAAman or PERman. He's got no ears, sort of like Whitey and the next guy Gintoki brings up.)

Gintoki: I'm wrong again?! Seriously?! Wow...

Are you...um...Freeza-sama?

(TN- Why Sama? O_o Does even Gintoki fear Frieza?

Whitey: ARE YOU BASING THIS ON MY FOREHEAD?!

Whitey: For crying out loud...I'm just like you.

A former human.

008

Gintoki: WHAAAATTT?!

You mean this isn't your final form Frieza-sama?!?!

Whitey: YOU'RE SHOCKED ABOUT THAT?!

Gintoki: You're a former human being like the rest of us?!

Wait a damn minuteeee!! How long have you been the top cat around here?

Whitey: How many years....

Lesse...just when did I become a cat anyway....

I ended up in this city about three years ago,

And became a cat thirteen years before that.

(Sfx- DOOON)

(Sfx- Gobaaaaaa Bloooorsssh)

Whitey: That's why I said it's impossible.

You'll never go back to being human again.

(Sfx- Patan thud)

Whitey: he kitty curse is simply something that cannot be undone.

Although the reasons and weights behind our curses are worlds different in any case.

009

Gintoki: So you've just given up on becoming human again?

You're going to live the rest of your life like this?

Whitey: This is my fault.

I can't run away from it.

I have to bear this burden.

Before I was a cat, I was worthless

And in a sense I still am.

Even now I remember how it was in the old days.

It was an abhorred existence which used power to bring anything down.

Really, the only difference between the me then and now is that I was on the bottom looking up.

Raised by Yakuza, I was no better than a hoodlum.

If the boss said to kill 'em, I considered 'em already dead.

I stopped trying to count how many lives were taken by my two hands.

So, if you wanna blame someone blame my boss.

Not like I could help it, I had to eat.

And killing was pretty much all I had the talent for.

Like an idiot, I kept acting as if I were simply a pair of limbs to be put to work.

010

Whitey: But then one day..

I met him.

Unlike me, he didn't have to answer to anyone.

I watched the blinding light of an animal living freely, doing as it wanted.

I dunno when it happened,

but at some point, watching him get food became a daily lesson for me.

In the days of taking lives,

At least when he and I were hanging out, I felt like I was free.

And it was beginning then that....

Killing people seemed...wrong.

I know what you're thinking...it's pretty damned ironic. I had killed whole families without feeling a thing.

Yet when I encountered this little life, suddenly all of the weight that I had been putting off became too much to bear.

'I won't kill anyone ever again.'

Is the promise I made to him.

011

Whitey: But the orders from my owner were absolute.

It was work that was near suicide. I have a feeling he knew that I wouldn't be useful anymore.

I planned to die.

And I would rather have my live stolen from me than to steal another.

That's what I thought...

012

Whitey: When I came back to my senses,

I was wading in a sea of blood.

Within that sea,

I saw a body that looked strangely familiar....almost like mine.

It was because of the promise I made to him that I ended up like this.

I had killed people again,

And even worse, killed him.

I can't expect something as convenient as an apology to make up for the lives I took.

But it's because he lent me his body, that I can live a little bit longer it seems...

So I decided.

I would never again take something that I couldn't replace.

He allowed me to live again in this form, so I will keep going....

013

Whitey: To protect what can't be replaced,

I have to use what he gave me.

Even if my ears are ripped off,

Even If I'm hated...

Even if I'm all alone...

Until this body rots,

I'll keep protecting what cannot be replaced.

Katsura: I thought so.

So those christened with the name of 'newbie'

Are cats you are trying to protect huh?

So that's why you continue to struggle to live in Kabuki-cho.

Why you continue to push your body to it's limits.

(Sfx- Kooouuu thooood)

Katsura: So you won't die meaninglessly...

014

Katsura: You instill fear into the other cats by acting like a tyrant...

So that they become street smart and don't make rash movements when it comes to dealing with the humans.

By acting this way, you hope to keep the cats from deterring outside the idea of fear.

And instead place all the blame squarely on yourself.

Whitey: So you do understand. Good, there's no need for me to preform this role any more.

I'm leaving everything to you now.

The Top cats around here will be you idiots.

Gintoki: WHAT?!

Why the hell are you suddenly nominating us!?

Hey listen! Rather than a Top Cat, you should try a Top Gorilla!

Kondo: THAT ISN'T THE PROBLEM HERE!!

Whitey: You guys'll be fine.

After all, those punks aren't going to listen to me for much longer anyway.

015

Whitey: You can have a look at what's going on in the city and figure that out easy.

With the humans out for our jewels, the relationship between humans and felines is only getting worse. I'm sure the other cats are getting damn tired of this too.

Katsura: Do not be foolish Whitey-dono!! We cannot even begin to compare when it comes to protecting the cats of this city!! Perhaps if we talk to them the others will reconsider!

There is only room for one Top cat in this city, and it's you Whitey-dono!

(Sfx- Ton tiff)

Whitey: I'm already over the hill.

I'm in no shape to be the Top Cat.

But there's still a few things that this old body has to take care of.

(Sfx- Totsu wiff)

Gintoki: Wait a sec,

You aren't going to let them....

???: 'Sup Whitey....

You havin' fun hangin' with your buds over there?

If it's a party,

Why not let us kick it up a notch?

016

(Sfx- Doooon)

Whitey: What the hell,

Are you idiots doing?

Cats: Heheh, Whitey...

You've been quite the big shot up until now haven't you? Busting our balls at every opportunity...

But that ends today.

Sure you've had us running scared up until now, but we're gonna lay everything out on the table and end this charade!

The uppidy humans are after us because of what YOU'VE been doing.

IF that's the case, we don't need a Top cat here anymore!! We'll live freely!!

(Sfx- Shaaaaaah hisssss)

Gintoki: A mutiny!!

Katsura: Stop this at once!! Don't you fools understand the reason WHY Whitey-dno has been behaving this way?! It's all for...

017

Cats: Shut your damn mouth!! We'll just put an end to all of you!!!

(Sfx- Shaaaaa Hissssss)

Cats: We won't let him OR his candidates leave here alive!!

(Sfx- Dododododododo rmmmmmmble)

Whitey: Get out of here.

I'm leaving you guys to,

Take care of the rest.

Gintoki: WHITEYYYYYY!!!

(Sfx- Dogashaaaaa Dshhhshshhhh)

018

(Sfx- Pota pota drip drip)

Whitey: Don't work over time.

I already said that I'm going to the neighborhood watch guys to turn myself in.

(Sfx- Pota pota Dripr drip)

(Sfx- Zuzuzuuu)

Whitey: If you want to help, give me directions there.

Cats: Wha---

All of them can't stop him?!

Just how long can he keep that kind of resistance up?

(Sfx- Zunnnn zuuun)

Cats: Do—Don't hesitate!! Pile on him!!

Gintoki: Damn!!

(Sfx- Baaa fwisssh)

Katsura: Wait Gintoki!!

(Sfx- Basasaaaa fwoooop)

019

(Sfx- Bassasaaa fwissssh)

Katsuo: UUhahahahah!! Got me a big 'ol bunch!!

Haven't got the slightest idear why they're here but who cares!! Get'm all!!

Cats: Damn!!

We were too noisy and the Humans found us out!!

(Sfx- Shagagagaaa fwisssshhh)

Whitey: Why the hell are you staring at me?!!

Get your asses out of here!!

Cats: W---Whitey!!!

(Sfx- Shurururu winnnd)

(Sfx- Bushsissssii grinnnnd)

Cats: WHITEY!!!!

(Side text- Whitey's been captured!! Gin-san, time to make a stand!!)

GINTAMA LESSON 277............END.