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Gintama 286

Not even losing to meteorites.

en
+ posted by Bomber D Rufi as translation on Nov 21, 2009 01:43 | Go to Gintama

-> RTS Page for Gintama 286

They seriously just need to name the series Gin's tama.

Locked and loaded. Scantlators are free to use this script, as long as the Translator notes remain on the scan (or on a separate page after it), and that kewl is credited with editing.

{The second round of this bout....}

{Is a no holds barred, Magic death match!!}

GINTAMA
Lesson 286: Not even losing to meteorites.
SORACHI HIDEAKI.

Announcer: This match will be two spell casters and two Shikigami. In short, a four on four match.

The battle will continue until one side is completely decimated.

(Lots of text- Yorozuya VS Shinsengumi! Both the Yorozuya office, and the Shisengumi HQ are recruiting!! Get your chance to join after the manga!!

A Compilation book 'Tama Hajime' hits stores on November 28th!! (Saturday.)

The latest volume of the manga #31 is out in stores!!

More info on the upcoming movie will be in the next issue, #53!!)

(Side text- A battle royal!!)

Announcer: This battle will use the 10-count system to eject someone from the ring as one way of tagging out.

The other way of tagging is to switch with your partner waiting alert in the corner by touching them.

And the competitors can not mix and match their Shikigami.

002

Douman: Heheh, Seimei...

You do understand that there cannot be two great Onmyouji in this world right? I will correct this error by erasing you.

As such I will also destroy this downward spiral of hate between our clans..

And sealing off the road of destruction....

Announcer: And now, let the battle begin!!

(Sfx- Doooooon Dooooooong)

Douman: I was still talking...

(Handwritten- I knew I should have made my speech a bit shorter....)

Supporters: DOUMAN-SAMAAAA!!!

Eradicate the Ketsuno clan bloodline, and usher in the new era of the Shirino clan!!

Kagura: You must win! Gin-chan! Sister Complex!!

Shinpachi: Do it for Ketsuno Ana's true smile!!

Douman: You lead.

Shirino-clan's second strongest, Souan.

Let them witness the true...

003

Gintoki: ORAAAHH!!

(Sfx- Dogoooo kiiiick)

(Sfx- Zushaaaaaa skreeeeeee)

Announcer: Whoa!! The Ketsuno clan makes the preemptive strike!!

Douman: 'The hell are you doing?! Where's your Shikigami dammit?!? NGH!!

(Sfx- Gan gan gan gan thwok bam thok)

Gintoki: What's the point of calling something out when fists work just fine?

If we just throw our fighters at you we won't lose to some frail kid like you!

Announcer: It seems the Ketsuno-clan has decided to make this a hand-to-hand fight before casting spells!

His sudden surprise attack has brought Douman into a real pinch!

004

Guy: Douman-sama!!

Tag me! You have to tag me!!

Announcer: Douman's reaching his hand into his corner in an attempt to tag out...

(Sfx- Gokuuunnn thowk)

Douman: NGAHHHHH!!!

Gedomaru: I thought I smelled something foul.

(Sfx- Meki meki grinnd grinnd)

Announcer: Oh what's this!! The Ketsuno-clan's Shikigami, Gedomaru is preventing Douman from switching teams!! There's no escape now!!

(Sfx- Guiii lifft)

Douman: Ngh...

Gintoki: Hey....you were Ketsuno Ana's former husband weren't you?

Ketsuno Ana, that ana, this ana...

But Let me tell you,

Do you think ALL KINDS of Ana

(Sfx- Dotsu THWOK)

Gintoki: just predict the weather, dammit!!?

005

Gintoki: YOU THINK LOTS OF ANAS HAVE STORM WARNINGS

AND PREDICT FLASH FLOODS!!?

(Sfx- GYAAHHHHHH!!)

(Sfx- Dosu dosu thwok twok)

Announcer: The Ketsuno Clan member has used his Shikigami to hold Shrino down, and has started poking holes in his...well Shirino!!! He's not getting a chance to call out his Shikigami!!

(TN- Remember, Shirino and Ana are both ways of saying ass...and there are lots of ass jokes here. So don't be the butt of the joke, and read the TN's.)

Announcer: Douman is fading fast!!

Gedomaru: Here's our chance Gintoki-sama!

Gintoki: Let's finish this!!

(Sfx- Chatsu clatter)

(Sfx- Gishiii grndd)

Gintoki: Ketsuno style secret technique!!

KETSUNO BOMBER!!

(TN- It really reads....ass Bomber. (Facepalm) Why do you do this Sorachi?)

(Sfx- Dooooooooon DOOOOOM)

Announcer: An explosive special technique!!

006

Announcer: Have Douman's chances for victory....

Disappeared?

(Sfx- Bokunnn poof)

(Sfx- Futsu fwfff)

Gintoki: GAHHHHHH!!!!

(Sfx- Doooou doooof)

Shinpachi: GYAHHHHH!!!!

(TN- Holy crap ow.)

(Sfx- Dosaaaa Thuuud)

Gedomaru: My bad, Gintoki-sama.

Announncer: What has just happened here?! Douman disappeared, slipping out of the Ketsuno clan's grasp!! And now Sakata has become the victim of his own Special move!!!

007

Shinpachi: What just happened?! Where is Douman-san?

Douman: Heheheh...

Fools. Did you really believe you had caught ME unaware?

Announcer: And Douman-sama surprises again!! When and how did he get to that corner?

Douman: Do you fools understand?

You have been picking a fight with one of my illusions this whole time.

I haven't taken a single step this whole match.

Shinpachi: An Illusion?!

Far from injuring me, fools like you can't even hope to touch me.

Guy: Uh...Douman-sama

Something's leaking from your ass...

(Sfx- Pota pota drip drip)

Douman: It isn't. I've always had this renal disease.

Shinpachi: You lie!! That's why you cant look at me when you say that!! The proof is in your wandering eye!!

Announcer: It seems that although Douman did use an illusion, his ass took serious damage.

Shinpachi: THEN WHO AN NEEDS ILLUSION!?!

008

Douman: While I'm applying Oronain ointment to my ass, take care of them.

(Sfx- Pan smack)

Douman: Smash those bugs into nothingness.

(Handwritten- I summon you!!)

Douman: I'm not interested in the insects he brought, just Seimei himself.

(Sfx- Bufshuuuuu hsssss)

Announcer: Things have taken an unexpected turn for the worst for the Ketsuno clan!!

It appears that Sakata is unable to move.

Gedomaru: Hang in there, Gintoki-sama.

Tell me what it is that you need,

And I'll try to help you.

Gintoki: My balls... rose up... Please lower them... If you could just get them back down to their proper throne...

Gedomaru: Is this the time to be talking like that?

How about I rub your lower back?

(Sfx- ton ton pat pat)

Gintoki: Oh...yeah, thanks....

009

Gedomaru: COME BACK TESTICLES!!!

(Sfx- Dogoooo THOOOD)

Gintoki: How much are you trying to lower them!?

Gedomaru: I thought if I used the same attack that I used the first time, it'd work...

Gintoki: That won't lower my balls, just my life expectancy!

Wait a sec.....

What's this?

My balls dropped....

ALL THE WAY ONTO THE FLOOOR!!!

Announcer: What's this now!! The Ketsuno clan's plan to lower the balls was overdone, and the fell all the way to the floor!

Gintoki: THIS IS A PROBLEM DAMMIT!! HOW CAN THIS EVEN HAPPEN?!

010

Gintoki: What the hell am I supposed to do with these?! Put them back!!

Announcer: I know it's painful Sakata, but we are in the middle of a match right now!

Gedomaru: I'm a little busy right now....Seimei-sama, can you please lend a hand?

Seimei: ...Yeah, no helping it.

(Sfx- Kushiiii swisssh)

(Sfx- Buooooooon fwooooom)

Gintoki: Whoa!

Announcer: Now Seimei is using his power from outside of the ring to return Sakata's balls to their throne!!

Douman: I won't allow it!!

(Sfx- kuuunnn difff)

(Sfx-Dodo thommp)

Gintoki: GYAHHH!!!

Announcer: Now Douman has jumped in to start outside ring interference!! The balls have once again dropped to the floor!

Seimei: Quit interfering Doumaaan!!!

Douman: I won't let you do what you please Seimeiii!!

011

Announcer: And now another fight has begun outside of the ring!!

A contest of strength between Seimei and Douman disputing over the testicles' throne as a symbol of comparing strengths!!

(Sfx- Fyooooooooo fwooooosh)

Gintoki: DON'T USE PEOPLE'S BALLS TO WAGE WAR AGAINST ONE ANOTHER!!

Seimei: Bastard!! Let them go up!!

Douman: Down you fool!!

Straight down!!

Seimei: Who cares about down, when they should be up?!

Gintoki: Owww!! Stop it!! You're crushing them dammit!!

(Sfx- Gaaan thuud)

Seimei: Dammit, we're not getting anywhere like this.

Douman, how about a proposal?!

Douman: What do you want, Seimei?!

Seimei: There are two balls right? I'll take the right one, and you take the left. That way we both control one of them.

Gintoki: WHYYYY?! WHY DO YOU WANT CONTROL OF MY BALLS?!

Douman: So you think we can settle this if we take control of each of the balls?

Gintoki: Wait...you're not thinking of FIGHTING with them are you?!

Douman: GO FORTH SASUKEEEE!!!

Gintoki: WHERE'D SASUKE COME FROM?!

Seimei: DO IT YUSUKE!!!

Gintoki: AND YOU NAMED THE OTHER FROM SAYU?!

(TN- Ah, the 'Sa' in 'Sasuke' is one way of saying left. While the Yu' in 'Yusuke' comes from Sayu, or 'Right and Left.' It is interesting to note that these two names are both WSJ protagonists as well.)

012

Announcer: And now, outside of the ring, one other fight is taking place!!!

Gintoki: OWWW!! DAMMIT, KNOCK THAT OFF!!!

Announcer: Who would have thought that a Ball on Ball battle by proxy would be taking place before our eyes!? Which will claim the throne in the end?! Right or Left?

Gintoki: PUT THEM BACK!!

OWWWW!! YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK THEM!!!

PLEASE LET'S JUTS ALL GET ALONG!! AFTER BEING APART SO LONG, DO YOU GUYS REALLY WANT TO BREAK UP THE SKET DAN'S HARD WORK OF BRINGING YOU TOGETHER?!? OUR HEARTS SHOULD BE AS ONE!!

(TN- I love it when Sorachi explains the joke for us. Sasuke and Yusuke are the names of brothers in Sket Dance. Which...is also in WSJ. Someone deleted the wiki so...no link?)

(Sfx- Gogogogogogo rmmmmmmmble)

Gintoki: Someone PLEASE stop them from fighting!!

(Sfx- Puchin sphsssh)

013

Gedomaru: This should be fine right?

(Sfx- Yurari wibble)

(Sfx- Dosaaaa thuuud)

Announcer: And he's doooooown!!

Sakata has been knocked out!! He probably won't be getting up from that any time soon either!

Kagura: Kin-chaaan!!

Shinpachi: Who's Kin-chan?

(TN- Kin from Kintama, or Testicles.)

Announcer: Let's begin the count down!

Shikigami?: There's no need for a countdown.

I'm about to smack this guy's head clean out of the ring!!

Seimei: GEDOMARU!!!

014

(Sfx- Gogashaaaa DOOOSH)

Announcer: Sakata's Shikigami has just barely managed to pull him out of harms way!!

The Ketsuno Clan has been saved from compete defeat!! Now Seimei can switch and enter the fray!!

Seimei: Hey! Wake up!!

Gedomaru: Gintoki-sama!

Kagura: Kin-chan!!

Announcer: Unfortunately, Sakata has lost consciousness! It seems he already won't be useful anymore, in various ways.

Seimei: Damn...

This happened because you were trying to help me out...

Gedomaru: We can still save him if we hurry.

Seimei: Yeah...I summon you Kuzunoha!!

(Sfx- Pitsu pat)

(Sfx- Dorooon poof)

Kuzunoha: Did you ring, Semei-sama?

(Sfx- Ufunn teehee)

Announcer: And Seimei has finally summoned a Shikigami!

However, she doesn't appear to be the battle ready type.

015

Seimei: Listen up Kuzunoha. I want you and Gedomaru to heal this guy.

You take care of Sasuke, and Gedomaru, you take care of Bossun.

Kuzunoha: Understood.

(Handwritten- Um, who's Bossun?)

(TN- To answer this question, let us venture back into Sket dance. Bossun is the nickname of the main character, Yusuke. I wonder if Shinohara is amused or infuriated that his former sensei would talk about his series this way...?)

Gedomaru: Seimei-sama.

Seimei: Don't worry about me...

I can take care of things from here.

(Sfx- ZAAAN doooom)

Announcer: What ho! Seimei has entered the ring....with no Shikigami of his own!!

Douman: Hahahahah! Big mistake Seimei!!

I know that you are the energy source for Shikigami all over Edo!! There's no way you have the strength to maintain them AND defeat me!!

An Onmyouji without any Shikigami,

Is the same as a Samurai without a blade!!

Shikigami: Do you think you can defeat the great Bontenmaru unarmed?!?

016

(Sfx- DOOOO thooom)

Shinpachi: Seimei-saaaan!!

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmmble)

(Sfx- Fushgagooooo dsssssshhhh)

Seimei: I can't see anything anymore.

Douman,

It seems I've gotten disoriented again.

But this time...

Work, Pride, status or even money.

or even this long connection

with you Shirino bastards...

017

Seimei: I can't see any of it.

(Sfx- Pikiiiin shwwwwinnng)

Douman: I-Impossible!! He stopped the Shikigami's attack bare handed?!

Th—That's!!

Seimei's strength...

It's suddenly burning within him....?!

(Sfx- Gogogogogo rmmmmmble)

(Sfx- Bishi bishi crack crack)

Douman: You---YOU!!!

Seimei you bastard!!

The power from all the Shikigami you have placed around Edo...!!

You're drawing all of their power back into yourself aren't you?!?

(Sfx- Gogogogogo RMMMMMBLE)

018

Douman: R—RIDICULOUS!! By doing this,

You'll really strip all of Edo's guardians of their power?!

Seimei: I no longer need eyes that see everything clearly...

There's only one thing that matters to me.

As long as I can see a genuine smile on her face,

I require nothing else.

(Sfx- DOOOOON THOOOM)

019

(Sfx- Shagoooooooooo FHOOOOOM)

Supporters: Wha---What is this insane strength!!

Shinpachi: Th—This is...

Kagura: Sister Complex's

True power?!

(Sfx- Gogogogogo Rmmmmble)

Seimei: Douman....bring it on.

I, Ketsuno Seimei...leader of the Ketsuno clan,

Will gladly award you with a display of my true power.

(Side text- The feelings of a brother...!! True power unleashed!!)

GINTAMA LESSON 286.............END.




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16 members and 15 guests have thanked Bomber D Rufi for this release

kewl0210, j_vincent_01, Arhazivory, Goral, Aki-kun, ibn., Keiko13, [MTT]Kamikaze, spartydragon, KaguraOkita, kamina, Autumncherry, Midori-chan100, kurosuzaku, KaosuNero, Gingurajusaant

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#1. by spartydragon (Registered User)
Posted on Nov 21, 2009
... Gin's Tama indeed. That made me cringe and I'm a girl. XD
#2. by kewl0210 (Translator)
Posted on Nov 21, 2009
Yeah... ok so I'll be checking this then.
It's really creepy, yeah...
#3. by kurosuzaku (Registered User)
Posted on Nov 21, 2009
.... And this is why Gin-san will never have kids =__=;;

Also a small error:
(TN- Remember, *Shirino and Ana are both ways of saying ass...and there are lots of ass jokes here. So don't be the butt of the joke, and read the TN's.)
*[["Shiri" and "Ketsu" = ass; "Ana" = hole]]
#4. by kewl0210 (Translator)
Posted on Nov 21, 2009
I sent him all my edits, I do them in PM rather than posting them publicly. But yeah, this should be all fixed up soon then.
#5. by Autumncherry (Registered User)
Posted on Nov 26, 2009
Ah! Seriously, this chapter scared me O_O Surely that isn't something you can fix >.<
#6. by Gingurajusaant (Registered User)
Posted on Sep 15, 2010
I wonder if in the anime, Kuzunoha did say 'who's Bossun?' in manga, who did say this question.

Also the the Onmyouji arc is truly a 'butt' of jokes and 'two-ball-hit.'

'Who's Kin-chan?' made me giggle but what made me burst into laughter was the Ass Bomber failure that hit Gin-san's balls and also Sket Dance references that ends with his balls crushed by Gedomaru's kanabo.
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