Gintama 354

Yup, as the title of this chapter says, it's just when you forget that BDR is around that I pop out with like eighty chapters of translations. Two Gintamas ARE 80 chapters of anything else, so that metaphor is not only appropriate, but true.



Shinpachi: Elizabeth-san's a spy?!

And her people want to take over the planet?!

(Sign- How do you write Renhou in kanji?)

(Side text- The TV anime is on the air!)

(Side text- The shocking truth is...?!)

Shinpachi: What are you saying?! This has got to be some big joke right.....?!

Why's the atmosphere become so serious over something like this?!

Katsura: You're telling me that things have developed into this?!

I remember everything....the phantom corps....white demons...

Renhou!!

That's Elizabeth's true form!!

(TN- The kanji for it THIS time is lotus mugwort.)

002

Fumiko: That's right. He acted as if he was your pet so he could observe earth.

The truth of the matter is he is a part of a unit gathering information for the mother ship..

Shinpachi: As a PET?! But no one has a pet that looks like that!!

He stands out too much!!

Fumiko: And your 'pet' is actually the leader of this group.

And now that his mission has come to an end, he's returned to the mother ship.

After deleting some rather 'troublesome' memories...

The reason why you suddenly can't remember what you've done with him over the past year is..

That he erased your memories.

Or perhaps it would be better to say,

That you've sealed those memories to combat the inconvenient truth....

Katsura: You're lying..
The time that Elizabeth and I have spent together...

Do you want to tell me it was all false?!

That it was nothing but an illusion...?!

003

Katsura: I'll never...

Acknowledge such a thing!!

I'LL NEVER ACCEPT THIS!!!

(Sfx- Dah dash)

Kagura: Zura!!

Zuraaaaaah! That is the toliet!!

Katsura: Ah, um..don't get too close...I can't go when I hear weird noses.

(Sfx- Jabaaaah dssssh)

Shinpachi: Could you not mix dramatic timing with emptying your bowels?!

Fumiko: What a cruel man.

To betray someone who believes he's a close friend....

He's tossed me aside in this fashion as well.

It's all for their plans...nothing can stop them....so he's been fighting all by himself.

However there's nothing I...or he could do to stop them...

Perhaps during this long year, the've been preparing themselves for invasion of earth.

It won't be long until earth falls into the hands of the Renhou...

But this is our chance to do something...

if we were to act now, we may be able to stop them.

(Sfx- kahhh fwaash)

004

Fumiko: Please, you have to help me..
And stop them..

(Sfx- Gogogogogogogo rmmmmmmble)

Fumiko: We have to....

Protect earth from the Renhou....

(Side text- Among the silent stars...)

GINTAMA
Lesson 354: A forgotten guy will come at the time he is least remembered.
SORACHI HIDEAKI

(Side text- The TV anime comes on every Monday at six pm, only on TV Tokyo! The special issue of 'Jump Next' has a Jump comics cover attached to it!!)

(Sfx- Zah zah zah zah zah tmptmptmptmp)

005

(Sign- His honor Metere)

(Sign- Has entered!)

(Sfx-Uuun veeen)

(Sfx- Shuuuuu vwooosh)

(Sfx- Doooon thooom)

(Sfx- Guuun fwppp)

(Sfx- Goooo fwooosh)

006

(Sign- My brethren....)

(Sign- At last the time has come.)

(Sign- How many years has it been since our home planet has lost it's light? How long has it been that we've searched to find a new place to call home?)

(Sign- All of us have lived as domesticated animals for this long long time.)

{But the time for our long suffering and observation has ended.}

{Although there are many planets around this grand universes, all able to support lives...}
{Earth is...}

{The one that he has deemed worthy for us to not only live but to thrive. And now it's within our grasp.}

{Our forces have already been placed upon this planet...}

{But now it is time to cultivate our seed and allow it to bloom...we will make our stand now.}

007

(Sign- We will eradicate the Earthlings!!)

(Sign- And then with these hands, return the Renhou to glory!!)

(Sfx- Babahhh fwaaaap)

(Signs- Banzai)

(Big sign- Glory to the Renhou)

(Signs- Banzai)

(Sfx- Zuzuzuu ssssshhh)

(Sfx- Zuuuu fssssh)

(Sfx- Gogogogogo rmmmmmble)

008

???: We've lost the target.

Their reaction has completely disappeared, leader.

???: Captain, this is...?

???: Oh..?

They've completely disappeared into the darkness.

So the name phantom corps isn't just a fancy title huh?

???: Is this the time to be impressed with them?

???: Don't worry~

Those guys are...

On that planet too.

(Sfx- Gashaaa Clack)

(Sfx- Zubaaah dooom)

(Sfx- Jakiiin clanng)

(Sign- The Milky way is unrivaled.)

009

Katsura: LET US MOVE OUUUUT!!

THIS TIME WE STAND FOR THE UNIVERSE!!

(TN- That horse looks badass.)

Kagura: Zura, that white base will not make it through the universe.

(Sfx- Hiiiiin neeeeeeeeeigh)

(Sfx- Dofuuh thok)

Katsura: Gegh!

(TN- Too badass for Katsura.)

Gitnoki: Well you never know. Maybe he could make it to space with that. Good luck buddy~

Katsura: Wait a moment, you fools!

With the Earth in danger, are you seriously going to just turn and give up? Are you not Samurai?!

(Sfx- Gufuu gllurg)

Shinpachi: If a Samurai is the type of guy who doesn't notice his pet scheming to take over the universe, I'd rather not be one.

Katsura: You...fools....Do you believe that phony over Elizabeth?!

I refuse to acknowledge her words! Elizabeth taking over the earth?! There's a limit to what can be considered funny!! Besides that, she IS Elizabeth's former girlfriend....

Fumiko: Do I look like the jilted lover type to you?

(Sfx- Dooon thoom)

Katsura: Ahhh!! YOU!!
010

Fumiko: Tell me, do I seem like a loose woman to you? Well? Do I?

Katsura: Of course you do, wench! AAAAAH!!

Fumiko: So why are you helping this 'wench' then?

(Handwritten- What are they doing?)

Katsura: I have no intention of helping YOU!

I'm not even doing this because I'm a patriot that wants aliens off our planet immediately!!

I'm doing it for my best friend!!

Even if you have a thousand doubts about her,

And a thousand proofs to back it up..

I have already traded glasses with Elizabeth!!

That is what a man calls friendship!!

I'm positive that there are reasons for this...

After all, he went out of her way to keep me from getting involved.

So even if it means flying around this universe and bathing in blood,

I will go to my friend's rescue.

Shinpachi: Um, you've already got a bloodbath going...

011

Fumiko: Hmph, a very straightforward man.

But he isn't as innocent as you'd like to believe.

For the sake of his plans, he even tossed aside his lover....that's how he is.

But that's fine. We don't need to have the same objectives to fight together.

You all will help us avert the world's destruction too, won't you?

Gintoki: Screw off. Don't try to involve us in this whole invasion scheme of yours.

More like, how the hell are aliens that look like you guys going to take over the world?!
Do you even know how to write the kanji for 'invasion'? Huuuuh?

(Handwritten- Invasion.)

Kagura: It is hard for even the Yato to do it.

Fumiko: Let's have a contest then, boy.

Unfortunately we can't compete under the sheets.

Gintoki: Who the hell are you calling a boy, bitch? As if I'd want to find out what postion a wench like you would like. Do yourself a favor and look into a mirror. Your peeks and ridges are probably like drums now, woman.

(Sfx- Shagaaaa fwsssh)

(Sfx- gii gii ree ree)

Fumiko: You're the one who needs to look into a mirror. There's an angel dancing over your head.

{Damn that's fast. She went from housewife to hussy in a heartbeat!!}

Shinpachi: No, what's fast is how you got over there to peep! Moreover, just what the hell is on her crotch that's so interesting?!

012

Fumiko: I prefer for men to ride me more than I like to give them a ride....

keep that nasty mouth in check, and I'll give you a ride straight to heaven.

Gintoki: Is that so? Well too bad....

(Sfx- Fuh fwip)

Gintoki: More then having them on top of me, I like to attack from behind.

(Sfx- Dan dan thok thok)

Shinpachi: WHAT ARE YOU GUYS USING THE PLAYGROUND FOR?!

{He caused the M in me to bloom in just an instant...}

Shinpachi: WEREN'T YOU JUST A PERVERT FROM THE START?!

Fumiko: I've got a better opinion of you Mr. Sleezy.

Gintoki: Same here. Welcome aboard.

Shinpachi: WHAT KIND OF AGREEMENT DID YOU GUYS JUST MAKE?! AND WHAT THE HELL KIND OF HANDSHAKE IS SO VULGAR THAT IT NEEDS A MOSAIC?!

Katsura: Hm. In such a short time, I've realized there's more to know about other races.

I think we could possibly talk to Elizabeth's people and perhaps come to an agreement for peace.

Shinpachi: You haven't even had a conversation yet!! And you're leaving your intentions bare for everyone to see!!

Katsura: Before we move out, we will first need to think of a plan.

013

Fumiko: Then, should I draw up a map that we can use for battle strategies?

Katsura: Yes, let us figure out what we will do about the uinverse.

Gintoki: What are you talking about, dude? A woman's body is a universe.

Kagura: I do not see a universe, just a forest.

Shinpachi: HEY ELIZABETH-SAN!! YOU CAN DESTROY THE EARTH NOW!!

(Sfx- Dodoooon THOOOM)

(Sfx- Gogogogogo rmmmmmble)

(Sfx- Gashaaan craaash)

(Sfx- Gara gara clatter clatter)

Shinpachi: YOU'RE KIDDING?!

I didn't think he'd actually do it!! ARMAGEDDON IS COMING!!

014

???: Commanding officer! We've destroyed the obstacle!

???: Cool, cool! Then let's prepare for landing!

(Sfx- Gagohhh thook)

???: Ngh!

(Sfx- Gofhuuu THUD)

(Sfx- Bara bara clatter clatter)
Mutsuu: What are you doing....

You're going to destroy Edo far before they can...idiot.

Shinpachi: Th---that's...!!

015

(Sfx- Zuboooh dooof)

???: Ahahahahahaah!

Hey guys!! 'Sup?! It's been a minute!! How many volumes was it again...?

(Sfx- Para para clatter clatter)

Sakamoto: Maaan, The Earth's got the best air, don't it?!

Shinpachi: Sakamoto-san!! Mutsu-san!!

Shinpachi: Why?! Why is the Kaientai here?!

Mutsu: Seems that we came just in time.

Shinpachi: Wait, just in time?! No way, do you guys know about the world invastion plot too..?

Sakamoto: Nope, It's 'cause we had to make it back in time for Taiga..!

We were hoping to appear when 'Jin' was around, and...

(Sfx- Gohh THOK)

016

Gintoki: All right, let's drop this idiot down the emergency stairs in some hospital.

Kagura: What era would you like to time slip to?

Sakamoto: You know, I'd like to go to the era where Ayase Haruka-chan is.

Gintoki: Cool, we'll send you to 'long long ago'.

(Sfx- Suru suru sliiddde)

Shinpachi: He's dropped far enough already!! If you drop him off of something else, he'll die!!

Katsura: Wait a moment, Gintoki! You...you're...

Sakamoto!!
Sakamoto: That voice...

Zura!! What's up man!!

How's it been going?! You taking care of yourself, dude?

Katsura: Have you?

I haven't seen you in some time, but you've really matured!

Shinpachi: THAT'S WROOOONG! WHAT IS THIS?! A GREETING SO SIMPLE A CAVEMAN CAN DO IT?! ARE YOU GUYS REALLY FRIENDS?!

(Sfx- Gah goh thok thok)

Mutsu: We don't have the leisure to give your idiocy an audience. Get on the ship.

(Sfx- Gahahahahah!!)

Mutsu: The universe is going to need you.

Katsura: Why do you know that...?

(Sfx- Shugoooooh fwhoooosh)

017

Mutsu: Oh no, the clouds have already started moving.

Hurry, you have to board before it's too late.

(Sfx- Gogogogogogo rmmmmmble)

Sakamoto: What are you talking about! We have to see Jin first...

Mutsu: SHUT UP ABOUT JIN!

(Sfx- Bagooo thoook)

(Sfx- Boh boh drip drip)

Lady: Oh no, it's raining. Here Ken-san, you can share with me.

Ken: S—sorry, landlady.

Lady: Ken-san, your right shoulder is getting wet.

Why not come closer...

Ken: It's fine. As long as it isn't you being drenched with rain...since it's not like the parents of an angel have accepted me.

Lady: Are you still concerned with what he said?

I wish you wouldn't concern yourself so much with what he said...he's already passed on. It's because of your support that the store has been able to flourish like it has....I've had all types of feelings I've wanted to embrace since then..

I know full well...

When he died, he not only asked you to watch over the shop, but to take care of me as well..

Yet you've never once responded to me...

Why are you so kind but taciturn towards me?

There's no reason to hold back any more....

How do you feel about me?

Can't you answer?

Why are you so silent? Answer me, please!

018

(Sign- Sorry...for some reason I can't seem to talk.)

(Sfx- Kuwaaaaaaaaaaah)

(Sign- Gyahhhhh)

(Sign- Gyahhhh)

Hanano: And as you can see, the city has been thrown into mass chaos!!

(Sfx- Gyahhhh!!)

Hanano: The sudden rain seems to change people's faces if it makes contact with them!!

They become unable to communicate with anything other than poster boards.

(Sign- What's going on?!)

(Sign- I don't know!!)

Hanano: Just what could be the cause of this?! What will Edo's fate be?!

Kusano: Hanano Ana, are you saying this incident is being caused by rain?

(Sfx- Gyahhhhh)

(Sfx- Bashaa splissh)

Kusano: Hanano Ana?

(Sign- And now we return to the studio~)

(Sfx- Zazaaah dooom)

GINTAMA LESSON 354...........END.

019

Katsura: W—what on earth is happening?!

Kagura: There are Eli's everywhere!

(Handwritten- There are one, two three...)

Mutsu: The seeds they planted are...

beginning to bud...

Once those clouds spread around the planet...

The Earth will become the Renhou's playground.

Shinpachi: Then you mean to say this rain is those Elizabeth-san's doing?

Fumiko: Moreover, how did you people know about our plan?

Sakamoto: Gahahahah! We're the Kaientai! If it's the universe you're talking about,

We've been all around these parts! So of course we'd know something like that!

After all, I'm the guy who brought those monsters...

To Earth!

(Side text- The culprit appears!)

(Sfx- GAHAHAHAH)