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Translations: Gintama 503 by Bomber D Rufi , Bleach 588 (2)
translation-needs-proofread

Gintama 451

Long title is long

en
+ posted by Bomber D Rufi as translation on Jun 26, 2013 22:28 | Go to Gintama

-> RTS Page for Gintama 451

Winning the lotto is like sex with a high class whore. You pay your money and then take your chances.

Hi wa mata noboru only.


(Top text- What you are awaiting….is it darkness? Or light…?)
(Red top text- The theatrical film ‘Gintama the final act, Yorozuya for eternity’ gets a lead color page right before the movie opens!!)

002
(Bottom text- Sorachi-sensei and Shimabukuro-sensei are in process of giving out 1000 brilliantly crafted signatures!! // For more info check out this weeks ‘Gintama’ and ‘Toriko’s double book in book features!!)
(Red arrow: The manga continues on Page 29!)
GINTAMA
SORACHI HIDEAKI

003
(Top text- It’s a must see!! ‘Gintama the movie: Final act, Yorozuya for eternity’ will have official movie programs on sale as well as ‘Rank 3 film’ supplied album pages! Please feel free to take a copy, so that you may take your memories of the movie back home with you!!)
(Side text- Jumbo dreams mean jumbo ordeals?!)
Lesson 451: Human life lasts only 50 years, Contrasting Human life with a life of Geten it is but dreams and Mohicans.
Mohican: Don’t move.
It only takes one of you doing something funny,
For the rest of you to end up being used for target practice, dig?
These are all the tellers and customers.
Awwright, we only need one of the tellers to take us to the loot.

004
{Why the hell is this happening?}
{I had all sorts of Mohican related delusions…}
{And now that I’ve found my way back into reality, I take one step to claim my prize money…}
{Waiting for me at the finish line is…}
{Mohicans robbing a bank?!}
{I’m not really even sure if these are real Mohicans are fake ones. So what the hell do I do now?}
Gintoki: Well this has gone to hell in a handbasket.
And you…aren’t you a cop? Shouldn’t you be sorta ashamed that you’ve got a front row seat to a crime in progress?
You Po-po are sooooo awesome. If it were me I’d be hiding my bright red face in fear and just a tad bit of shame.
{Shut the hell up! You’re the one who decided to come in here too! I’m not just a ‘Po-po’ now anyway!}

005
{In my pocket I’ve got three hundred thousand hidden…}
{My whole body’s like a friggin’ worm on a hook!! I’m a bait cop dammit!}
{If those burglars notice that I’ve got the lotto ticket on me…}
Mohicans: Hoshit! We’ve unexpectantly hit the big time over here!
{No. The worst case scenario would be if this guy noticed.}
{Yeah, I’d better not make any moves. Last thing I want to do is endanger people’s lives…and my 3 hundred thousand…}
{But should I ignore a police officer’s duty and sit this one out still the storm passes..?}
Mohican: I guess while we’re waiting for the safe to be opened, we should do a little collection out here too.
We’re gonna be doing some body searches here.
You got money or anything valuable on your personage, then it becomes our property.

006
{Geh!!}
Gintoki: Oh c’mon dudes. You’re really gonna pinch every penny that these bank-going citizens have?
I’ve heard of petty theft but this is ridiculous.
Mohican: Hey. Who just opened their pie hole?
{D—don’t start saying unnecessary crap dammit!!}
Gintoki: Sorry, I tried to stop him, but he’s just got this sense of justice that won’t be controlled.
(Handwritten- He’s right over here.)
(Sfx- Gachaaah *clack*)
{M—MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!?}
Gintoki: That’s what you get for being smart dude. Since you went and said all of those things, you ougtta cough out all of your cash.
{WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO DOOOO?!}
{If I take out my wallet they’ll see the lotto ticket for sure!}
Mohican: I advise you let us see what you’ve got and quick….for your own safety.
{I—If that’s the case…}
(Sfx- Doooon *thmmm*)
Hijikata: H—hows this then?

007
Mohican: A—A POLICE OFFICER’S IDENTIFICATION!?
N—NO WAY!! YOU CAN’T BE…?!
Hijikata: The Shinsengumi’s Vice captain, Hijikata Toshirou.
T-too bad guys, turns out your master plan neglected the part where you get busted by the cops.
Maybe you haven’t noticed it, but the bank is gonna be completely surrounded by Shinsengumi units soon.
(Handwritten- Awwright! Here comes the tail!!)
(Handwritten- We’ve sure got a lot of time to kill when we’re off duty.)
Hijikata: And once they’re assembled they’ll all burst in here once I make the signal and cut you guys to mincemeat.
If you like breathing I’d suggest you drop your weapons and surrender. I promise things will go a lot smoother for you that way.
{Please you guuuuuuysss!! You have to believe meeee!!}
Mohicans: S—shit! Who thought the Po-po would all come here!?
What are we going to do?! We don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell against all of those trained swordsmen!
{Here we goooo!!}

008
Gintoki: Calm down gents.
(Sfx- Zatshh *shfft*)
Gintoki: They’re not just gonna come in and slice up the joint that easily.
After all you’ve got hostages….namely us.
{WHO’S SIDE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE ON?!}
Gintoki: If you line the hostages up like this, then they won’t try to come in and attack you guys.
So basically you’ll be able to do whatever the hell you want as long as we’re in here, right?
Mohican: Y—yeah, I get it.
{You’ve stopped being a hostage dammit!! What stance are you talking from now?!}
Gintoki: Let’s say you guys wanted to get away before the po-po smash this place in….well now would be the time.
However taking all of these hostages would prove to be somewhat of a handicap.
So what you’d need to do is take a single hostage to get your desired effect. Though just anyone isn’t gonna cut it.
To cut a long story short, you need a hostage the police are gonna give a damn about.
Mohican: Like a police officer!!!
{HOLD THE FUCK UUUUUUUUUUP!!!}

009
Gintoki: And you can just leave things after that to me here. I’ll make sure to take care of everything.
(Sfx- Zatzahh *Sfffts*)
Mohicans: THANKS SO MUCH!!
{WHY ARE YOU THANKING HIM?! AREN’T YOU GUYS AS THE BURGLARS THE MAIN OFFENDERS HERE?!}
Gintoki: And don’t worry about a thing here Hijikata-kun…
I’ll make sure…
To take GOOD care of everything.
{T—that asshat…!}
{HE FIGURED ME OUUUUUT!!}

010
{Heheheh, smell ya later you damn rotten police thief.}
{Don’t worry, I’ll take 300 yen out of my Three hundred thousand to buy flowers for your funeral.}
Hijikata: Wait!!
Wait a second!!
He has…
Three hundred thousand yen!!
Gintoki: Huh?
(Sfx- Burororo *vrrrrrrm*)
Gintoki: What the hell are you doing?
Why didn’t you get all noble and shit when YOU had the three hundred thousand?!
Hijikata: You forced me to do this when you decided to hand me over to friggin’ bank robbers!!

011
Gintoki: Don’t mess with me dammit! I dropped this in the first place so…
Hijikata: And the old lady gave it to ME after you irresponsibly lost it! I don’t give a shit what you did before that!
Gintoki: I had no idea that the cops employed cat burglars!!
Hijikata: If you wanna call someone a cat burglar, go after the old lady! I just happened to get it from her!
Mohican: Hey, hey. No fighting.
Our bank robbery got screwed, but lady luck is still sitting in our lap.
Now which of you gents has the three hundred thousand? Mind spilling it?
{That’s right…they don’t know it’s a lotto ticket…!!}
Hijikata: Uh…yeah.
See his grandma is totally like this rich old bat.
If she were to ever kick the bucket, this guy stands to inherit her entire estate. So he just sorta rolled into the money.
R—right?
Gintoki: Y—yeah? I had a grandma like that and stuff.
{He’s still protecting the lotto ticket!!}
Mohican: Where are her assets then?
(Sign- Hozumi bank.)
Mohican: Listen up guys…just keep your mouths shut and hand us the cash nice and easy like.
You do anything funny and you’re gonna get turned into Swiss cheese, got it?
(Sfx- Uiiiin *veeeen*)

012
Gintoki: If you ask me, I think it’d be better If you just went ahead and just started shooting.
Hijikata: NO ONE ASKED YOU THOUGH! YOU DO UNDERSTAND THOROUGHLY WHAT’S GOING ON HERE RIGHT?!
{Of course I don’t dammit!!}
{Where the hell do I find an old lady who has a ton of savings?!}
{Just go and do something!!}
{I—I know that if anyone can do this it’s you!! I believe in you and your grandma!!}
{I really don’t want to use this..}
{For the three hundred thousand…}
{But there really isn’t a point to keep the lotto ticket.}
Teller: Um…how may I help you?
{I—I guess I have no choice…}
Gintoki: Umm...you may not be able to see this right now, but I’d really like to keep from using it.
(Sfx- Mozo mozo *shfft sfft*)
Gintoki: So quietly hand me three hundred million yen.

013
(Sfx- Dooon *thooom*)
Hijikata: DIDN’T YOU JUST ROB A BAAAAAAAAAAANKG?!
(Sfx- Hyahahahahaha)
Hijikata: WE’RE ACCOMPLICES TO BANK ROBERRY NOOOOOW!!!
Gintoki: Don’t talk shit about me!! I had no other choice!! At least unlike you I took good care of the lotto ticket!
Hijikata: With the face you were making and your hand in your clothes, you looked like you had a pistol!
Gintoki: You should be thanking me for saving your shitty little life and protecting the lotto ticket, assbreath!!
Hijikata: So essentially we just avoided robbing a bank to rob a bank!!
To protect a three hundred million lotto ticket we just burgled three hundred million yen!!
Mohican: Bro, you’ve got a good arm don’tcha? You managed to get three hundred million yen without any weapons on you!
(Handwritten- ‘Cause lets be for real, that inheritance story was garbage.)
Hijikata: These guys were able to take apart that story with just a glance!!
(Sfx- Faan faan faan *weeeooweeoooweeoo*)
{You there in the truck! Pull over!}

014
??: Th—the police!! You guys were ripping us off weren’t you?
No..that was definitely you guys.
Gintoki: Hey! What crime have I committed…
(Sfx- Basaaah *wifft*)
Gintoki: Ah!
(Sfx- Peshihh *plssh*)
Dude: Uwah! What’s that?
A lotto…
(Sfx- Gaaaahhh *craaaaaaash*)
Dudes: GYAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
Hijikata: You saw nothing.
You didn’t see this lotto ticket, hear me?!
Dudes: GYAAAH!! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
(Sfx- Kiiii *reeeeeeeeh*)
Dudes: AAAAAAAGH!!!
(Sfx- Dooooon *craaaash*)

015
Gintoki: Gee, I thought you were a friggin coooooooop!!
What’s with you using your entire body to aid escaping criminals?!
Hijikata: Hey don’t talk shit about me! I was just trying to get the ticket back!!
Moreover you should be pissed at yourself for letting this almost fly off!!
Mohicans: You guys sure saved our asses!! Youv’e got guts!!
At this rate, we’re all gonna get away scot free!
Gintoki: Great! Just GREAT!! Now we’re striking up a sense of camaraderie with these idiots!!
At this rate they’re going to start including us in all of their jobs!! We’re basically bosom buddies!!
(Sfx- Kiiii *screeeee*)
Mohican: Oh shit guys!
They’ve got a roadblock up ahead! We’re completely surrounded!
(Handwritten- Stop at once!!)
Mohican: What should we do?!
Gintoki: What do you mean ‘What should we do?!’ Forget friends, you guys are treating this as if we’re the bosses of this outfit!!
Hijikata: Now or never…
(Sfx- Zushaaaaah *sdsssssssh*)
Gintoki: Hold on!!!

016
Gintoki: And where the hell are you going alone with my lottery ticket?!
Hijikata: Is this the time to be saying selfish shit like that?! If we don’t do something we’re going to get hauled away with those guys!
If we’re gonna run, we gotta do it now!
Gintoki: Fuck you! This is mine and I’m taking it!
Hijikata: Wait! Wait! We’re going to rip it!!
(Sfx- Mishiih misshihhh *ggrrind grrinnd*)
Mohicans: RIP THROUGH ‘EM!!
ALL RIGHT GUYS! WE’RE JUST GONNA RIP RIGHT THROUGH THAT WALL!!
Guys: No…
THAT’S NOT WHAT WE MEAAAAAAAAANT!!!

017
Mohican: Awwwright!! We’re through!!!
As long as you guys are here, nothing can break us down!!
From here on in, if we do our parts then even the police can’t beat us!
(Sfx- Kuwaaaaaaah *roaaaaaar*)
Mohicans: Hijikata-san, Sakata-san, if we make it out of this alive lets meet up and get slammed!!
Hijikata(?): LIKE HELL WE WILL!!
WE’VE PRETTY MUCH COMMITTED A PERFECT BANK ROBBERY!!
FORGET ABOUT THE LOTTO TICKET, IF WE’RE SEEN HERE OUR LIVES ARE OVER!!
(Sfx- Dota bata *thmp tup tup*)
(Sfx- Kuwaaaaaaah *roaaaaaaaar*)
Hijikata: What do we do now?! The cops are all converging on us!!
This is an illusion…!!
Thanks to this thing I’m having delusions!!!
Old lady: So stop furrowing your brow and staring at account books for a bit.
Try putting this scrap of paper in your pocket. By just doing that I’m sure your view of the world will change.

018
Hijikata: Ever since I got my hands on this my world has completely changed.
If I hadn’t gotten this, the world wouldn’t be as screwed up as it is now.
Gintoki: A single sheet of paper has caused a complete about face huh?
We’ve still got plenty we want to do right?
So let’s just go ahead and end this.
Hijikata: Yeah…it’s about time we opened our eyes.
The dream of three hundred million…
That’s in our hands…
Isn’t something worth showing off…
It’s good enough just being a dream.
It’s too late to regret anything.
Gintoki: I don’t.
Cause I’ve got three hundred million here.

019
Hijikata: WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE THOOOOOSE?!
Gintoki: I gave you the lotto ticket, so I just figured I’d make do with these.
Hijikata: OH HELL NO! THEN THE ILLUSION WE’VE BEEN CHASING IS YOUR…
(Sfx- Gachaaa *clack*)
(Sfx- DOOOOOON *THOOOOM*)
Okita: Ahh…so that’s how it was.
So that money wasn’t stolen…
But the money you took from the burglers to give back huh?
(Handwritten- Sakata-san, Hijikata-san, lets hook up in prinson!!)
Guys: Y—yeah that’s right.
Okita: Sorry about the mix up then. But you gotta admit, your whole conversation sounded kinda sketchy…like you two were the thieves.
Well we did capture the culprits, and the infiltration investigation has been all taken care of.
We’ll take responsibility for the three hundred million that got burnt up.
Huh? You two got somewhere you gotta go?
Guys: We’re going to buy lotto tickets.
(Side text- Humans are always dreaming….)
GINTAMA LESSON 451………….END.




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Alias: Bomber D Rufi
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