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Translations: Bleach 600 (2)
translation-needs-proofread

Gintama 499

Glasses are part of the spirit.

en
+ posted by Bomber D Rufi as translation on Jun 27, 2014 00:44 | Go to Gintama

-> RTS Page for Gintama 499


You'd think after 499 chapters of Gorilla trolling action that we'd have some masochistic love of being fooled..... then again, maybe we do. Maybe we do.

Hi wa mata noboru only.


(Side text- This time despite it being 10 years running, a truth about the Gintama world is revealed…?!)
GINTAMA
(Sfx- Chun chun *tweet tweet*)
Tae: Well then do your best at work.
Have a good day!

002
{Doesn’t this seem…}
{A little weird?}
(Side text- Has the world gone weird? Or is it just Shinpachi?!)
GINTAMA
Lesson 499: Glasses are part of the spirit.
SORACHI HIDEAKI

003
(Sign- Glasses repair.)
Old guy: ….So…
What kind of glasses do you want?
Shinpachi: Something like these….just normal I guess.
(Handwritten- The lens on these broke.)
Shinpachi: All of the stylish places are really expensive, and my glasses are the type of things that are drawn in one go.
Old guy: I see. Well my shop isn’t fashionable at all I suppose.
Shinpachi: Ah! I’m sorry! That’s not what I meant!
Old guy: No, it’s perfectly fine. Rather than concerning myself with what the eyes see, I believe what can’t be seen is most important.
Glasses aren’t simply accessories. They are the stand ins for the eyes of their owner.
They’re a second set of eyeballs.
For example the likes of my glasses are…
In any case, just try these on sir.
Shinpachi: Wah!
These are perfect!
You just looked at me and was able to tell?!
Old guy: It’s not something I have the ability to do…it’s all thanks to the second set of eyes I have.

004
Old guy: Are normal glasses good enough for you though?
Shinpachi: I—I mean normally as long as they allow me to see things that’s good enough right?
Old guy: You sure?
Shinpachi: Y—yes?
Old guy: Absolutely positively?
Shinpachi: Yes. Absolutely positively.
Old guy: Then how about giving these glasses here a try? They may look useless at first glance…
Shinpachi: They certainly do, yes.
Old guy: But they’re Cur *sed glasses. Hailing from another country, these will allow you to see objects even if they are a distance away.
Shinpachi: Cur *sed glasses….
Old guy: With these you’ll be able to ascertain any truth clearly and perfectly no matter how far away it is.
Shinpachi: Clearly perfectly….no matter how far?
Old guy: Yup.
All of creation…
Will be absolutely, positively clear.

005
{Yeah, everything is absolutely positively clear…}
{But I’m seeing spiritual things that I really shouldn’t get an absolutely clear look at!!}
{They’re not Cur *sed glasses…}
{But Cursed glasses aren’t they?!}
{I’m seeing all kinds of creepy crawling things!!}
{On people’s backs there are people with really poor complexions clinging to them!! What is this!?}
(Sfx- Pipihhh *beep*)
{Protector spirit.}
{It’s analyzing those things!! These glasses have the ability to analyze them?!}
{It’s just copy and pasting the information from Vikipedia?!}
{Guardian sprits are ghosts who possess people to protect them. It has been westernized as the Spirit doctrine known as ‘Guardian Spirits’. Vikipedia extract.}

006
{Are Guardian Spirits really supposed to look like that?!}
{These glasses will never become fashionable!}
(Sfx- Gachagachaa *clack clack*)
{These cursed glasses won’t come off!!}
{That accursed old man!!}
{I won’t forgive him for selling me this crap!!}
(Sfx- Hyuuuuuh *wiffff*)
{The shop is..!}
{No way…that glasses shop appeared by coincidence when I was lost…}
{So what if it wasn’t of this world to begin with…}
{What should I do?! What can I do?!}
Shinpachi: Gin-saaaaaaaan!! I need your help!!
Gintoki: What the hell man. You’re so damn noisy early in the morning…
What’s the deal?
Did you see something?
(Sfx- Zooooohhh *doooooom*)
(Sign- Talk and I’ll kill you.)

007
(Sign- Talk and I’ll kill you.)
Shinpachi: N—no. N—nothing at all.
(Sfx- Paku paku *Shiver shiver*)
{There’s a super spirit here tooooo!!}
{The spirit haunting Gin-san is no joooooooooke!!}
Gintoki: What the hell is wrong with you? Do you want me to kill ya or something?
Shinpachi: S—sorry. Please don’t kill me.
{What the hell is that thing?! What kind of spirit is that?!}
{Forget about a spirit, that’s basically a monster isn’t it?!}
{I haven’t been able to see it up until now, but has a monster like that been with Gin-san for 499 lessons?!}
Gintoki: I’m stupid busy this morning. I don’t have an arm or leg to lend to you. Hell I don’t even have enough for my damn self.
{Um but it seems like you’re using about six there!! The guardian spirit is helping you prepare for your day!!}

008
Gintoki: You need to get your ass to work on the double too. There are events going on in town that we need to participate in.
(Signs- You should have something to eat.//Do you want a medium serving of breakfast? Or large?)
{Are you his mom?! Moreover am I seeing the reason why it’s with him here?!}
Gintoki: Ah, the miso broth moved.
{The phenomenon of the miso broth moving is the guardian spirit’s doing?!}
(Sfx- SHuuhh *sfft*)
(Sfx- Goh *thok*)
Gintoki: Ngh! I suddenly need to take a dump!
{This is the truth behind the morning call of nature?}
Gintoki: Hey…someone didn’t flush the toilet after unloading their kids at the pool.
{THE GUARDIAN SPIRIT FORGOT TO FLUSH THE TOILET?!}
{I—I had no idea…}
{Both of the guardian spirit’s existence…}
{And the extent that they support a person’s daily life!!}
{B—But…it feels like theirs is a world that I shouldn’t go casually revealing…}
{Even knowing this, to think Gin-san has such a fearsome guardian spirit backing him…}
{It’s no wonder he’s so strong!}
{I wonder if it’s one of his ancestors…or perhaps a God from times past…}
(Sfx- PIhhh *beep*)
{Guardian Spirit Asuraman// Sakata Gintoki’s guardian spirit. He acquired him when he was younger and bought a gashapon. He was the spirit of a Ginnikuman eraser.}
{HE WAS THE SPRIT OF A GIN ERASER?!}
(TN- Ginniku-Kinniku. A popular wrestling manga in the 80’s where kids could send in their own designs and have them used.)

009
{What the hell is the spirit of an eraser?!}
{After winning seven of the same Asuraman erasers he abandoned six which turned their malice into a spirit who schemes to strike him down for revenge as soon as he lowers his guard.}
{That’s not a guardian spirit at all! It’s an evil one!!}
{It’s special ability is using its eraser to erase certain things.}
Gintoki: Hey! There’s no toilet paper here!!
{What kind of gentle revenge is that?! Moreover why does Vikipedia have it down too?!}
(Sign- If you bring him any, I’ll kill you!!)
Gintoki: Are you there Shinpachi!?
{I’m sorry Gin-san, your guardian spirit is running interference.}
Gintoki: Kaguraaa!! Can you hear me?! Wake your ass up!!
I need some toilet paper on the double!!
(Sfx- Gararara *clatter*)
Pikachu(?): SHUT THE HELL UUUUUP!!!
Forget that crap and bring on the booze! Let’s get hammered!
(Sfx- Hikku *hiccup*)

010
{WHO THE HECK IS THIS OLD MAAAN?!}
(Handwritten- Upsy daisy.)
(Sfx- Hikku *hic*)
{Guardian spirit: Alchuu. Kagura’s guardian spirit. A spirit of a P*kemon popular with children.}
{WHAT THE HELL IS ALCHUU?! WHAT KIND OF RIP OFF IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE?!}
{Wanting to ride on the P*kemon boom despite her poverty, she made her own Pi**chu stuffed animal, and with the collaboration of drunkard’s vomit a miraculous monster was born.}
(Handwritten- Aaaaagh!! My Pi**chu!)
Gintoki: ORRAAAGHH!!
{I’ve seen that drunkard somewhere before!!}
{Now that I take a good look at him, his face is pretty damn familiar!!}
{He made an oath to be a guardian who is never separated from the alcohol that birthed him.}
(Sfx-Gubi gubi *drink drink*)
{Alchuu is just a friggin monster isn’t he!! He can’t fit in one’s pocket…he’s just a tragedy filled monster!!}
Gintoki: Kaguraaaa! Paper!!
YepstillgonnacallhimPikachu: Shut the hell up wouldya? Dammit, these guardian spirit users are a filthy bunch….wait a damn second, I’ll call my master.
(Sfx- Hikku Hikku)
Pikachu: Master, a shochuu on the rocks.
{NOT THAT MASTER!!}
Pikachu: Master wake uup~ The shochuu is all out!
HOOOORKH.
{The heck kind of method is that to wake someone up?!}

011
(Sfx- Gabaaah *fwaaap*)
(Handwaritten- Uwaah! It stinks!)
{Is this why she always wakes up in a bad mood?!}
Pikachu: Master…there’s no more shouchuu….
C’mon, give me some alcohol…
Alcohol…alcohol…
Pikachu: Al…al…
Kagura: Uugh…I’m sleepy…
Pikachu: Al….
(Sfx- Uro uro *shake shake*)
{As alcohol is his energy source, he will often demand al, al alcohol feverently from his host.}
Kagura: I wanna pee
Pikachu: Al..
{So the one saying ‘Aru’ (al) is youuuu?!}
(TN- I usually render this as ‘yes’ in the translations, but Kagura’s sentences usually end in ‘aru’.)
{That isn’t a copula of hers?! It’s just a drunk man’s ramblings?!}
Kagura: Hey! Is anyone in there (al)?
What is this? There is no response (al).
{Ah, I forgot about Gin-san in there.}
(Sfx- Suuuhh *wffff*)
{Guardian spirit Kami knights.}
(TN- The kanji reads ‘God’ (kami) but I’m sure it’s probably ‘Paper’ (kami.)
{WHY DID YOU BECOME A SPIRIIIIIT?!}

012
{Sakata Gintoki’s spirit born from the grudge of being stuck in the bathroom every morning without toilet paper and shouting out and not being heard by anyone.}
{Not having toilet paper is enough for you to become a spirit?! And you do this sort of pointless thing EVERY morning?!}
(Sfx- Furaaah *fwaap*)
{He wanders in search of Matsumoto Kiyoshi in order to gain the toilet paper he seeks as well as walk Sadaharu. He is the guardian spirit of giving Sadaharu excellent walks.}
{YOU’RE THE ONE WHO TAKES SADAHARU OUT FOR A WALK?!}
(TN- Matsumoto Kiyoshi is a chain of drug stores in Japan.)
Spirits: Take care.
{TAKE CARE MY ASS!! IN THE END YOU TWO AREN’T USEFUL AT ALL!!
(Sfx- Wai wai)
(Sign- Kabuki cho athletics meet.)
Shinpachi(?): Kabuchi cho athletics meet?

013
Gintoki: It’s the old bat’s plan to get everyone in town to be more friendly towards each other.
And it goes without saying that we’re obligated to participate.
For God’s sake. Doesn’t that old bat understand that we’re all at the age where watching old dudes and cabaret girls run around is just torture?
{If it were old guys and cabaret girls, I’d be fine with that, but…}
{The only thing I can see…}
{Is the war of the demon world!!}
Kagura: We’re on the white team…and the red team is across from that.
Ah! Red is good isn’t it?
{I can…}
{See the that the entirety of the red team is sporting a ravishing blood red color!!}

014
{The guardian spirits are glaring right at me…}
{It seems that they’re going to launch into a secret feud for the sake of their hosts’s victory sight unseen!}
Dude: Hey…look ain’t that the white team guys?
Have they come to cast a curse on our red team so that they have an advantage?
Naw man, just knock that off. Don’t you guys know that those are the hosts of Asuraman and Alchu?
What? Those guys? They’re…
The protector spirit of many kills Asuraman…
And battler admiral killer Alchu!!
{What?! Those two are actually celebrities in the guardian spirit world?!}
Spirit: Yeah man, they line up proactive spirits and then mow ‘em down.
During the Ooedo Super lottery, it was those two monsters who brought victory and a box of laundry detergent to their hosts.
(Sfx- Charin charin *ring ring*)
(Handwritten-It’s number 4)
(Handwritten- What, just detergent?)
{While you guys were doing that, a guardian spirit deathmatch was happening right behind youuu!}

015
{So then everything that happens in our daily lives are actually the after effects of what the guardian spirits do!?}
Dude: Hey…lookit him.
That glasses dude is walkin’ around buck ass naked with no guardian spirit.
{Eh?!}
Spirits: We could curse the shit out of him with no problems guys. You up for it?
{Crap! That’s right!! I don’t actually have a guardian spirit!!}
Spirits: This is for our masters on the red team, so don’t think too badly of us!!
(Sfx- Kuwaaaaahhh *Roaar!*)
{Waaaaaaait!! Don’t be hasty!! It’s just an athletics meet!!}
(Sfx- Gaaah *Graaab*)
???: Hey.
I happen to be acquainted with that guy.
(Sfx- Meki meki *grind grind*)
???: I might have a host around,
But I don’t recall giving you asswipes permission to mess with my buddies.
Spirits: Y—you’re..
The hero of the abandoned lunch box war struggle….Mada…

016
Hasegawa: Get outta my sight, small fry.
{Protector spirit Madao//Guardian spirit of sun glasses.)
{Wait…you’re a guardian spirit tooo?!}
{A guardian spirit of sunglasses?! That’s what you’re the guardian of?!}
{Living as if he’s dead a monk like spirit who has practiced austerity to the point of death. At first glance he appears to be a living human, but his true essence is the sunglasses he wears and the human part is the spirit. Without the sunglasses he is nothing.}
Hasegawa: Are you okay Shinpachi-kun? You were in a tight spot there just now.
{Nooooo I should be asking YOU if YOU’RE okay! When the hell did you become a spirit?! Moreover the glasses are your true essence?!}

017
Hasegawa: You should be careful..the spirits have a killing intent that’s stronger than usual.
If you slip up you could die at this athletic meet.
{Um, but it appears that you already died!!}
Hasegawa: It appears the winning team gets a 50 million yen payout. That’s enough to get everyone worked up.
{Um if the people here knew anything about it they wouldn’t get even a thousand yen out of this!}
Hasegawa: Have a look at that.
Dude: Hngh..
Dude2: H—hey Yosaku! You okay?
Yosaku: My stomach suddenly…
Dude2: Hold on…nghh!!
Dude3: Kichinosuke!! Hunngh..
Nnngh..
Nnnnh…
Shinpachi: That’s…
Hasegawa: The effect of the guardian spirits….
A host and his guardian spirit have a resonant fate. If the guardian spirit is predominant then the host will stand predominant. If the guardian spirit is in trouble then the host will be in trouble.
Shinpachi: Ah…when did the guardian spirits start fighting?!
They’ve started a fight over who will lead their host to victory and gain the prize money!! The fight’s already begun on this side too!!
(Sfx- Kuiiih *dooof*)
???: Hey! The guys with stomach aches are retiring one after another!!
Shinpachi: What’s happening here?! Nothing’s even started and everyone is getting annihilated!! What about our team…?
(Hsfx- doshiiiaaah *dhooom*)
Pikachu: Awwright, now that prize is pretty much ours.
{They’re starting internal striiiiiiiiiife?!}
(Side text- Next week is the 500 chapter of serialization, but as usual it’s chaos!!)
GINTAMA LESSON 499…………..END.


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