Mission! School 1

(Do not use without permission, etc.)

<> - sound fx
[] - notes
[TL Note: ] - major note

(translated top to bottom, right to left)

Mission! School 1

p001

A New Serialization!!

Mission [in black, on top of Mission! in English]

School [in black, next to girl]

Officer: R-ridiculous...

GOOOOO <burning fx>

baki <house collapsing fx>

bachi <house collapsing fx>

Officer: Our entire platoon, wiped out in 3 minutes...

oooo <burning fx continued>

Caption: From "Role Player" Ohmi Takeshi, an <italics>unbelievable</italics> work has been produced...

Officer: Are they monsters...?!

gooooo <burning fx>

Hazuki: No, no, don't be silly.

Hazuki: It is <italics>you</italics> who deserve to be commended.

Hazuki: To actually face us and hold out for <italics>3 minutes</italics>.......

BGGirl1: su-.. [quiet acknowledgement]

BGGirl2: su- [quiet acknowledgement]

Officer: What in the world.......?!

Officer: What are you people......?!

goooo <burning fx>

p002

GOO <burning fx>

Hazuki: Just ordinary

Hazuki: young ladies.

A New Serialization!! [above Age Evolution 15]

Massive, random shots of sublime, Fantasy(Weirdness)-filled gags!! ["Weirdness" is the kanji in the orange bubbles]

A story on the battlefield, of Gun X Maidens!!! [actual term used is Ojou-sama, with connotations of the upper-class and nobility]

Super [in orange]

An academy of gags you won't get over [in yellow]

Mission [in black, on top of Mission! in English]

School [in black, next to girl]

Chapter 1 The Ladies Quietly Arrived!!

The man who gives lotion out as souvenirs

Ohmi Takeshi [in yellow, next to comic]

One Week After

A certain city in Chiba Prefecture

p003

Kuriyama Private High [name: Chestnut Mountain]

This is the setting for our story-----

Ishikawa: Haaaa--- So, a new school year......

Ishikawa: Ahhh really, [stylized text outside of balloon]

Ishikawa: what a pain......!

haaa-.. <sigh fx>

And here's our story's protagonist, Ishikawa Takuya.

Scholastic Aptitude : Below Average
Sports : X
Special Skills : None
Motivation : None

His hobbies are Online Games and 2chan●el, and he's a prospective NEET. [● is not a typo, it's a censor blot]

Ishikawa: What kind of intro is that?!

p004

Principal: Oh, good morning Ishikawa-kun.

Kuriyama High Principal
Kuriyama Hiroshi (56)

Ishikawa: Principal? What are you doing here?

Principal: Oh, taking a walk and enjoying the morning air.

Ishikawa: By the shoe racks?

Principal: Well, the scent of schoolgirl feet is best enjoyed from this place...

Ishikawa: The freshness of the morning air just rotted in one go.

SUUUU.... <inhale fx>

Ishikawa: Please stop that, you're the Principal after all.

Principal: Ridiculous!! Are you asking me to die?!

Ishikawa: Stopping is the same as dying?

Principal: Anyhow, I was actually waiting for you, since I had something to speak with you about.

Principal: It's a little sudden, but there are transfer students coming to your class.

p005

Principal: I wanted to entrust them into your care.

Ishikawa: I see, is that so?

Ishikawa: I understand. It's a hassle, but for the sake of improving my student record, I'll take the job!

Principal: ...I'm serious, you know.

Principal: Well then, there are 30 of them but, do your best.

zawa zawa zawa <chatter fx>

p006

Principal: Hey, hey, nowadays we don't have those sorts of reactions anymore.

Principal: It's like something out of manga from the 80's, ha ha ha. [below balloon]

Ishikawa: そのくらいしちゃいますよ。 *[incomplete][best guess: To go that far.]

Ishikawa: Can you really call this a transfer? Aren't you changing the entire class?

Principal: No, no, you and Meguro-kun are still left.

Ishikawa: Wouldn't it be better to just transfer us then?!

Meguro-kun

p-oonn <punchline fx>

Meguro: .......

wai wai <delight fx>

Ishikawa: Incidentally, that uniform----

Ishikawa: Hmmm, those kids are students from Saint Arsenal Academy.

Ishikawa: If I recall correctly, their school building was blown away in a gas explosion...

Headline: Enigmatic Gas Explosion

Ishikawa: Hmmm, since you were worried about them

Ishikawa: you must have decided to take them into our care.

Ishikawa: I see, as an educator, you just couldn't leave the situation be.

Principal: Not really.

p007

Principal: The payoff was great.

fasa... <flutter fx>

kira kira <sparkle fx>

Happy Face

Ishikawa: Money, huh?

Principal: That school is pretty wealthy.

Principal: 君以外のクラスの子はお金渡したらプリっと転校してくれたよ。　*[incomplete] [We paid your other classmates so that they'd プリっ transfer for us.][プリっ <- what's this?]

Ishikawa: なんですか。プリって。 *[incomplete][What? What do you mean プリっ?][プリっ <- what's this?]

Ishikawa: I haven't heard anything about that.

Principal: That's because I wasn't able to contact you during the summer holidays, since you were travelling.

Ishikawa: Then Meguro-kun's here for the same reason?

Principal: Not really. I just don't like him.

Principal: I didn't want to give him any money. [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: Poor Meguro-kun!

Hazuki: Ummmmm....

p008

Hazuki: Might you be Ishikawa-sama perhaps?

Ishikawa: Yes, I am, but......?

Hazuki: Ah, I thought so!

Hazuki: It is an honor to meet you. I am called Hazuki.

fuwari <soft/gentle fx>

Hazuki: I have been informed by the Principal about Ishikawa-sama...

niko <smile fx>

Hazuki: This lady is in your deepest debt.

Hazuki: Left and right, we encounter things we know nothing of.

Hazuki: Please, we are in your care.

kika <light touch fx>

Ishikawa: Principal...

Principal: Hn?

p009

Ishikawa: It's great, isn't it? That these young ladies are here.

So adorable, gorgeous and cute! [below balloon]

doku doku doku doku doku <spurt fx>

Principal: Each and every one of your reactions are straight out of the 80's.

kururi <turn fx>

Ishikawa: Reeaaally...?

Ishikawa: So you were all in the same class in your previous school.

Principal: Yes. I was the class president.

Ishikawa: Suddenly switching schools must be hard, huh?

p010

Hazuki: Oh, not at all..... we, raised in the confines of the academy's dormitories, have had no opportunity to learn of the society beyond its borders.

Hazuki: This too must be how the spirits who know well of this world feel... [spirits = kami]

raa- raa- <angelic fx>

raaa-..

Hazuki: But, I'm worried about whether we might cause Ishikawa-sama too much trouble...

Ishikawa: It's perfectly fine, there's no need to worry about that when we're classmates.

Ishikawa: You don't have to use "-sama" either. [out of balloon]

Mob: Ooh! Thank you so much!

WA- <squeal fx>

Girl1: We are blessed to have such a kind person as a classmate.

Girl2: Oh, absolutely.

Ishikawa: To be [right of balloon]

Ishikawa: Aah, joy!

Ishikawa: this close to girls [left of balloon]

Ishikawa: Farewell, my mediocre school life!!

p011

Ishikawa: If there's anything you don't know, whatever it is, you can always ask me!

waki <bg chatter fx>

ai ai <bg chatter fx>

Hazuki: You're the only one we'll ever depend on, Ishikawa-san!

Meguro: ......

Airmaster Meguro

Nishi: He-he-he, sound's great......

Meguro: Bwaah-?!

NU-.. <menace fx>

Nishi: If you wanna know how things work <italics>here</italics>, I can teach you all about it......

Nishi: Ohooo-, what a cute bunch [out of balloon]

giro- <leer fx>

p012

Hazuki: Well...... what happened to your hair?!

Nishi: どーもしねぇよ。 *[incomplete] [best guess: I'm not answering that.]

Nishi: Pay attention, someone's talking here. [on hair]

Ishikawa: Shh-! Hazuki-san, you shouldn't call attention to someone's physical deformities!

Hazuki: Ah, pardon me.

Nishi: I'm talking about a policy, not a deformity!

Nishi: Y'know, I'm called Long-Hair Nishi around here. [name: West]

ZU I- <loom fx>

Nishi: Rule's simple, the strong devour the weak.

Nishi: In other words, you women gotta listen to whatever we say, right?

Hazuki: Well......

Ishikawa: Hold it Nishi!!

gasha <grab fx>

Nishi: Hey, that wimpy sense of justice of yours will get you hurt, yeah?

go go go go <tense fx>

Ishikawa: It's not that......

go

p013

Ishikawa: I agree with that rule of yours <bold>completely</bold>

Ishikawa: but this is my <bold>Paradise</bold>!! And there's no way I'm turning it over to-----

Ishikawa: <bold>YOU!!</bold>

KI-! <glare fx>

Nishi: What a selfish guy!!

Nishi: Anyway, as I was saying.

subaaan <slap away fx>

Ishikawa: I'm weak!!

Just a little bit happy.

nyari <smirk fx>

Hazuki: --------So you raise your hand against us......

go go go go go go <rage fx>

Hazuki: As a leader, I have restrained my personal feelings despite your repeated discourtesies.

Hazuki: But I can no longer restrain myself when you strike my classmate right before me...

Meguro: Ummm, he actually hit me first but......

p014

Nishi: Aaah? [out of balloon]

Nishi: And what are you going to do if you can't hold back?

Ishikawa: That's dangerous! You've got to stop, Hazuki-san!

Hazuki: It's fine, Ishikawa-san.

he-he-he <laugh fx>

SU PAN <slice fx>

Hazuki: As a lady,

Hazuki: 'tis but my duty to teach him a few manners.

HUH? [no idea who this guy's supposed to be, but it's a running gag]

p015

bara <sliced to pieces fx>

Nishi: Wh-

Nishi: Wh-

Nishi: Whaaaaaaa?!

bara bara bara

Hazuki: If you intend to apologize, wouldn't now be best?

Nishi: Who's going to apologize?!

Nishi: You should be the ones to do it!!

Nishi: <bold>Wwwhaaaaaaaaaaa?!</bold>

Underling1: Owwwww!

Girl1: A-1 Suppression Complete.

gyuu <tightening fx>

Underling2: Hiiiii-!

Underling3: Mmmmph-

Underling3: Mmmmph-

Girl2: A-2 Complete.

Underling4: Ghiiiiii-!

Girl3: Complete.

Underling5: Gyaaaaaaaah

bikun bikun <twitching fx>

Hazuki: You do understand? Our rudeness is but a fitting response for your own crime.

Nishi: <bold>W-what are you people?!</bold>

Hazuki: <bold>Just ordinary</bold>

nikkori <smile fx>

Hazuki: <bold>young ladies.</bold>

Nishi: <bold>Y-y-you better remember this!</bold>

Hazuki: As you wish.

Ishikawa: .............

p016

Ishikawa: Hazuki-san, that was......

Hazuki: Ah-

Hazuki: Forgive me. To use a survival knife in a melee, and a hollow-handle at that, I've had thoughts myself of how inappropriate it is.

Hazuki: But strength and practicality aside, I really like this knife and......

Hazuki: I'm such a poser, I'm sorry [out of balloon, below face]

Hazuki: kyaa [out of balloon, next to hair]

Ishikawa: I wasn't going to ask about that.

Ishikawa: I have no idea what she's embarassed about. [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: What I wanna know is how you can do those things.

Hazuki: Wouldn't any school require counter-terrorism classes?

Hazuki: ?

Ishikawa: No matter where you look, no school in Japan has classes of that sort.

Ishikawa: Haa- [out of breath]

Ishikawa: Haa-

tatatatatatata <running fx>

Ishikawa: Principal!

Ishikawa: Principal!

Ishikawa: Priinciiipaaaal!

BA N <bang open fx>

Ishikawa: Those girls are incredibly weird but-------!!

p017

Principal: Now, see here, you didn't knock, did you?

haa <panting fx>

haa

haa

kira <sparkle fx>

Happy Face

Ishikawa: It's even weirder in here!!

Directress: Oh my...... have <italics>my</italics> girls done something wrong?

Ishikawa: Lady, just what S&M dungeon did you crawl out of?

Directress: I am the chairman of Saint Arsenal Academy's board of directors-----

Directress: and currently, this school's new principal-----

Ex-Principal: And currently, I'm the new principal's chair......

haa haa haa

Ishikawa: Is that right. <bold>Go die.</bold>

p018

Ex-Principal: And as said principal's chair, no matter how much money you offer, I'll never give this station up!!

Ishikawa: Is that right. <bold>Please shut up.</bold>

ki-! <glare fx>

Ishikawa: Actually, because of blah-blah and yada-yada, things are really bad!

Directress: Oh my. Our first day here, and things are already in such a state, hmmm?

Ex-Principal: Hobakujutsu for S&M...... [TL Note: Japanese (martial) art of rope binding and restraints...]

Ex-Principal: it's worth a try!

Ex-Principal: ha-! [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: How can you speak so cheerfully about this?!

Already just ignoring him.

Ishikawa: Nishi's gang tallies up to 200 men strong.

Ishikawa: No matter how strong those girls might be--------

Ishikawa: If it goes on like this, how will things end up.....?

Thugs: Waaaaaaaaaa [out of balloon]

p019

DO DO DO DO DO DO DO <engine fx>

Nishi: <bold>How dare you disrespect me?!</bold>

Meguro: Why me...?

Nishi: <bold>Hey, hey. Don't get cocky just cause you've got a knife!</bold>

Nishi: <bold>You think you can get away with mocking this many of us?</bold>

gaa <motor fx>

voon <vroom fx>

p020

Ishikawa: <bold>Aaah, look! This is how things turned out!</bold>

Ishikawa: <bold>And now they've taken Meguro hostage!</bold>

Ex-Principal: What's this...?!

Ex-Principal: <bold>I can no longer allow this! Let's call the police!</bold>

Ex-Principal: It's Meguro and yet, such violent play.....

Ex-Principal: I'm so jealous!

Ex-Principal: <bold>And let's drive these ruffians off as well!</bold>

Directress: <bold>Oh, <italics>my</italics> girls will be just fine---</bold>

Ishikawa: What do you mean they'll be fine?!

Nishi: <bold>Hey, hey, 'zat regret I see on that face of yours?!</bold>

Hazuki: It is, isn't it? I do feel a bit sorry......

Nishi: <bold>HA-HA-HA! That's right! That's right!</bold>

Hazuki: I guess the way I dealt with you was rather naive.

Nishi: Ah?

Nishi: What's she doing? [out of balloon]

p021

Hazuki: <bold>I should have made sure to completely incinerate the trash.</bold>

ZU BA <weapons out fx>

Hazuki: Well everyone, here's out first mission in this new world.

JAKI <guns being cocked fx>

jaki jaki jaki

p022

Hazuki: Let's act in a manner befitting ladies.

DOKAAN <explosion fx>

Girls: <bold><italics>SIR YES SIR!</italics></bold>

ndodododo <firearms fx>

DOON <explosion fx>

Meguro: Why even meeee?!

Punk1: <bold>Hiiii- Save me-</bold>

gan <random impact noise>

Punk2: Oh- My leeeeggaaah-!!

don <random impact noise>

gan <random impact noise>

Punk3: <bold>Mommy, mommy!!</bold>

gagagagagagaga <firearms fx>

bon- <bounce fx>

Ishikawa: W-

Ishikawa: w-

Ishikawa: what the hell......!!

Directress: Ufufu, amazing aren't they?

p023

Directress: Those girls' skirts are full of secrets. All sorts of things come out of them.

Directress: わあいメルヘン... *[incomplete][わあい fantasy...][わあい <- what's this?]

Directress: of 4th-dimensional skirts......

SHARARIII-N <angelic melody fx>

Ishikawa: NOT! [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: What I want to know is why these girls can do those things!!

Directress: That is simply because these girls are the most gifted young ladies.

Ishikawa: That doesn't answer anything!

Directress: What do you think of the world's current state of affairs...?

Ishikawa: Huh?

Directress: It is a world sullied by sadness, is it not?

Directress: A taint caused by the darkness that lies in adult hearts.

Ishikawa: No [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: You can talk about that even in a situation like this...?

p024

Directress: It is why I educate these children.

Directress: With a message of love and kindess, I raise them to be splendid ladies,

Directress: for the sake of attaining future peace, and a beautiful tomorrow......

DON DON DON DON DON <machinegun fire fx>

Ishikawa: Your words aren't fitting the backdrop at all, are they?!

p025

Directress: To establish an academy of love requires money,

Directress: and so I've gathered the daughters of influential men, and have them finance their own <bold>education (brainwashing)</bold>. [TL Note: she says education, but the kanji means brainwashing]

Ishikawa: Eh?

Directress: To preach a message of love requires strength,

Directress: and so I have endowed them with <bold>(military) might</bold>.

Ishikawa: Huh?

Directress: All for my dreams of <bold>World Peace (Domination)</bold>...... [TL Note: she says world peace, but the kanji means world domination]

Ishikawa: ぷりっと本音がでたー？！ *[incomplete][best guess: The ぷりっと truth comes out?!][ぷりっと <- what's this?]

Directress: But sadly, there are still many <bold>fools (authorities)</bold> with no understanding of love...... [TL Note: she says foolish people but the kanji means people in authority (i.e. gov't, law enforcement, etc)]

Directress: My academy ended up destroyed...

Ishikawa: Isn't that something any decent country would do?

Directress: This and that have been troublesome-----

Ex-Principal: Hmm [out of balloon]

Ex-Principal: I was moved by such a wonderful vision for education. This is where I stepped in.

un un <agree fx>

Ishikawa: You just rolled over for the money!

p026

Ex-Principal: <bold>Who rolled over for the money?!</bold>

BA- <slam fx>

Ex-Principal: <bold>I just empathize with her ideas (oddities)!</bold> [TL Note: he say logic/ideas, but the kanji means quirks/oddities]

Ishikawa: Is that right. Sorry then.

Nishi: Hiiii-!

zuzabora <backing into and scraping against a dead end fx>

Hazuki: S-save meee!

Hazuki: There is no need for such fear.

gogogogogo <rage fx>

Hazuki: I'll make sure to blow out your Medulla Oblongata with one shot.

Hazuki: If you move and I miss, it'll really hurt.

Nishi: <bold>How can you smile while you say that?!!</bold>

nikkori <smile fx>

p027

Directress: Wait Hazuki-san......

Directress: We are disciples of a god with a message of love.

Hazuki: Ah.....

Directress: Isn't it too rash to simply kill him so suddenly......?

Hazuki: I'm so sorry directress, I hadn't really thought about it thoroughly.

Ishikawa: whew-... [out of balloon]

Ishikawa: I knew they wouldn't take things too far......

Hazuki: I'll re-educate him about love.

Hazuki: Surely, that would be the way of a lady.

BIBIBIBIBIBI <brrzzt fx>

Nishi: Ngggh-

Nishi: Ngh-

Nishi: Ngggh-

Directress: Ah, yes yes, that's right.

bikun bikun <twitch fx>

Ishikawa: This is even worse-----!!

p028

Directress: Hazuki-san, let's try raising the voltage in a bit.

Hazuki: Yes.

haa haa haa

Ex-Principal: Aah...... how enviable....

moji moji moji moji <embarrassed wiggling fx>

Ishikawa: Sorry, but this is too much for me.

Ishikawa: Please allow me to request a transfer as well.

don <explode fx>

Directress: But why?

Ex-Principal: That's right! And we're at such a wonderful point too!

Ishikawa: What point?!

dodon <explode fx>

Directress: Hmmmm

Directress: Ishikawa-san,

Directress: have you noticed how neither the police nor the fire brigade have arrived despite all the noise?

Ishikawa: N-now that you mention it, it is rather strange.

Directress: You could say that I've arranged matters such that I have complete control over this entire area---

Ishikawa: ......And?

p029

Caption: Naturally, those charming paties will stay to the bitter end. This steadfast, abnormal, orthodox military unit has been activated.

Directress: So, even if someone like you were to <italics>disappear</italics>, it wouldn't cause any noise at all---

Ishikawa: I'm being so casually threatened-----?!

And thus, my mediocre high school life

came to an end.

Hazuki: From here on, we'll be in your complete care, Ishikawa-san.

nikkori <smile fx>

Ishikawa: <bold>NOOOOOOOO!!!</bold>