Hissori Releases

Translation: Gintama 109

Mon, 13 Aug 2007 08:47:11 +0000

Page 01

Chapter 109: Hana Yori Dango (Dumplings Over Flowers)
[i left the title in Japanese because it's a pun on the manga series "Hana Yori Dango" (Boys Over Flowers), and the pun is more noticeable in Japanese than English.]

Gintoki: Your shop is gloomy as always, old man.
Old man: Your face is gloomy as always, mister. Hehe.
(Shop sign: Dumpling Shop Konpeitou)

Gintoki: Nowadays, sweets shops have showy things like parfaits and cakes. / You have only dumplings... They're good, though.
Old man: I'm a dumpling maker. This is the only talent I have.

Old man: You still wear that wooden sword around your waist? / Nowdays, samurai are --
Gintoki: It's like a pacifier. If I don't have something around my waist, I can't calm down.

Page 02

Old man: Huh,
- it's a tough time for the analog group.

Gintoki: What's that?
Old man: It's a recently opened sweets shop called "Andromeda". / You can taste sweets from all sorts of planets there. It became popular in no time... The few customers I had were all sucked up by it. Hehe.

Gintoki: ...You really need a billboard girl or something, huh? Ah, I see her panties.
Old man: I have a billboard girl too. Ah, I see her panties.

Gintoki: That's not a billboard girl.
- It's a bedrock girl.
[Note: This is a pun -- billboard is "kanban", and bedrock is "ganban".]

Old man: Women aren't about looks. Look at the size of that ass, mister. It can give birth to healthy children, hehe. Ah, I see her panties.
Gintoki: I don't want to look at something like that.
Woman: Gin-saaaaan~

Woman: Here, have this.
- It's my service. <3

Page 03

Gintoki: I'm going home now, old man.
Old man: Wait, successor.
Woman: Ah, welcome.

Gintoki: Oh, a customer. Good for you, old man.
Woman: What would you like to order?

Andromeda owner: Dumplings.
- That's all you have anyway.

Old man: It's the owner of Andromeda...
- The owner of that new shop.

Old man: Oh, my, thank you for coming to our dirty shop during your busy day, Andromeda owner.
Andromeda: Sometimes I feel like eating at a simple shop like this. How's your business?
Old man: Thanks to you, we're penniless. Please send us a few customers, hehe.

Page 04

Andromeda: That's why I said you should quietly sell this shop to me and retire.
- Dumplings are old-fashioned now. There's no way customers would come to a plain shop like this.

Andromeda: It's my dream to make this entire area Andromeda's sweets street.
- There are too many crude, savage sweets on this planet. With here as my base, I'll spread true sweetness through this country.

Old man: No, this struggling dumpling shop has been passed down for 400 years. / I can't readily let this taste die out in my generation.

Andromeda: Hmph, the old, traditional taste?
- But shouldn't the customers decide which taste should really remain?

Andromeda: Why not have a contest with me? I'm going to have an event for advertising.
- Even if you stubbornly continue to run this dumpling shop, it's clear that you'll eventually be crushed.

Andromeda: If you win against me, your reputation will rise, and customers might return.
- To accommodate you, I'll make the contest about dumplings. We'll both make dumplings and compete for customers in the span of one hour.

Page 05

Andromeda: Of course, if I win, I'll take this shop.
- But your so-called traditional taste can't lose, right? / So how about trying this once in a lifetime gamble?

Andromeda: Or,
- do you not have confidence in that 400-year-old traditional taste?

Andromeda: Well, I won't pressure you. Do as you like.
Woman: Um... dumplings!

Andromeda: I don't want any. I can't eat something that rustic.

Woman: Daddy...

Old man: I guess this is an opportunity.

Gintoki: Does that mean

Page 06

Gintoki: We can eat dumplings for free?

Sign: Sweets King Battle

Announcer: Come here, come look, and while you're at it, please eat!
- A big contest between man and man, artisan and artisan, sweet and sweet is about to occur!

Announcer: The old dumpling shop guarding 400 years of traditional taste, "Konpeitou"!
- The popular sweets shop spreading unknown sweetness from the far ends of the galaxy, "Andromeda"!!

Page 07

Announcer: The two sweets shops, old and new, have made these dumplings using all their skills.
- Please, everyone, eat your fill of dumplings from the side you want to eat from.

Announcer: While I was talking, a line has formed in front of Andromeda...
- As expected of the most popular sweets shop in Edo right now!

Announcer: On the other hand, Konpeitou...
- doesn't have a single customer yet!

Woman: ...Daddy...

Andromeda guy: The result was decided from the start, wasn't it.
Andromeda owner: The shop's reputation will rise, and I'll obtain that land. Everything is good.

Announcer: It feels as if the result has been decided before the contest even begins...

Page 08

Announcer: Ah, what's this!?
- Three people!! It's only three people, but they are surely headed towards Konpeitou!

Andromeda guy: Kuku, only three people.
Andromeda owner: What a great, historical taste.

Gintoki: Mister...

Gintoki: It's really free, isn't it.

Old man: Yeah. This is probably the last time you can eat our dumplings.
- Eat to your heart's content.

Page 09

Announcer: Ah, it's time! / Well then, start the contest!!

Announcer: There's a rush of customers to Andromeda!! The plates are disappearing one after the other!

Announcer: On the other hand, at Konpeitou...

Announcer: Ahhhhh!!
- How fast! Somehow, only three people are opposing Andromeda!

Gintoki: You guys, eat so much you won't have to eat for three days!!

Old man: Mister...
Announcer: They're starving!! They didn't come to taste sweets! They only came to satisfy their hunger!!

Page 10

Announcer: The plates are piling up at an incredible speed!! / On the other hand, at Andromeda... This is...!!
Handwritten text: No, no, after you eat, return the plates here.
Announcer: They're being pushed around by so many customers, it seems that they can't manage the plates!

Andromeda: Umph...

Announcer: You can't tell anymore!!
- It's unbelievable, but with only three people, Konpeitou is competing equally with that huge crowd!

Old man: Mister!!
- I'm sorry, you like our shop so much as to go this far...

Man: Ah, it's no good, we can't eat here. Let's go over there.
Announcer: Ah, people are giving in and coming to Konpeitou because of all the confusion...

Gintoki: Don't come to the Sakata family's dinner table!!

Page 11

Old man: Heeeeeey, what are you doing, mister!?
Announcer: Oh, what an occurance! The people who came have been knocked out!

Gintoki: This is our dinner table!!
- I won't let anyone in!!
Announcer: Dinner table declaration!! An "our dinner table" declaration! It appears that he's not thinking about the contest at all!

Old man: Mister!! You shouldn't be saying that!! This is a contest!! If you have time to do that, eat more dumplings!!
Kagura: Gin-chaaan!! This goes well with rice!!
Old man: What are you doing!?

Old man: Why are you eating rice with dumplings!? You'll get full!!
Kagura: If I don't eat white rice, I don't feel like I've eaten a meal. Western food is crap!
Old man: That's why I said you're not here to eat a meal!

Shinpachi: Kagura-chan! I told you, it's bad to eat carbohydrates with carbohydrates!!
Old man: Why are you trying to stuff dumplings into tupperware for take-out!?

Shinpachi: If you put them in the freezer and microwave them when you eat, you can eat them later!!
Old man: Eat now!! There's no point if you eat later! What's with that poverty-like way of thinking!?

Page 12

Announcer: Since both sides are quarreling, they can't manage the plates!
- The side that takes control of the situation first will have an advantage!

Andromeda guy: Suitsu-sama!
Andromeda owner (Suitsu): Don't panic. I've planned ahead.

Sumo wrestlers: Move it, move it!!
People: Uwaa, what!?

Announcer: Ahhh! That's...
- Sumo wrestlers!! They're sumo wrestlers!!

- A group of sumo wrestlers has suddenly appeared and pushed through the crowd, taking over the table!

- They're eating dumplings at an incredible speed!
- It's like the dumplings are Maruboro!! A monster! He's a monster!
[Note: Maruboro is a cookie/cake-like snack.]

- Andromeda has 500 plates! Konpeitou has 450 plates!
- There's a 50 plate difference! This will be hard to overcome!

Page 13

Old man: Mister!
Gintoki: Don't worry.

Shinpachi: Up until now, we were having a meal.
Old man: Are you full!? That's not good!! I'm done for!!

Gintoki: Now it's time for work.

Kagura: Come on.
- Appetizer time is over.

Gintoki: Shinpachiiiii!
Shinpachi: Got it!!

Page 14

Gintoki: Eat
- to your heart's content!!

Announcer: Ahhh, what is this!?
- To make eating easier, one person is taking dumplings from the skewer, and the other is throwing them decisively into the girl's mouth with perfect control!!

- Combination!! This technique forms a perfect combination!!
- Fast! What unbelievable speed!

- The sumo wrestlers are eating undauntedly as well!!
- Equal!! They're equal!!

- Neither side will be outdone in this contest!!

Page 15

- But what's really fearsome is that China girl's stomach.
- Is it bottomless!? She's competing equally with five sumo wrestlers... No, she's above them... / Ahh!!

- She's eating rice!? Unbelievable!! She's eating rice in-between dumplings!!
Gintoki: Are you an idiot!? I said don't eat rice anymore!!

Kagura: Western-style food is crap!!

Kagura: Gwaaaaah!!
- My eyes... my eyes!!

Shinpachi: Kagura-chaaaan!!

Kagura: There's sauce in my eyes!!
Announcer: Ohhh, there's sauce in her eyes!! That's painful!
- It seems that she won't be able to stand up for awhile.

Page 16

- This is a perfect chance for Andromeda!!
- Ah, but they're reaching their limit too.

Gintoki: Shinpachi...
- Hurry and take Kagura to the hospital.

Gintoki: Leave the rest
- to the Sugar King.

Shinpachi: Gin-san, it's impossible with that stomach!!
- Besides, if you eat even more sweets... The doctor told you to stop!

Gintoki: Guys these days give up too easily.

Gintoki: Right, old man?

Old man: Yeah, indeed.

Page 17

Announcer: Ohh, he's still going! He's still going to eat!!

- After eating that many dumplings, his stomach should be at its limit!!
- But why is he eating!? Does he like sweets that much!?

Old man: ...Sorry, but
- we're stubborn, bad at giving up,
- analog people.

Announcer: Both sides are at their limits!!
- They're pushing dumplings down their throats by willpower alone!
- There's only one minute left!! The plates are completely equal!!

Page 18

Announcer: Ahh, after coming this far
- both sides have stopped moving!!

- What's the obstacle at the very end!?
Suitsu: What's wrong!? Why aren't you eating!? If you eat just one more, we win!

Sumo wrestler: Ugh...
- Just looking at dumplings makes me want to puke.

Old man: Fufufu, he's tired of them, huh.
- It's normal to get tired of eating hundreds of plates of the same dumplings.

Suitsu: He's tired of them!?
- I've tasted many sweets, and made use of them by creating various sweets. That he would get tired of my dish is...

Suitsu: That's impossible for my dumplings. They're different from your poor, rustic dumplings!
- Besides, your person has stopped moving as well...

Old man: If you create a thousand flavors in the world, / then I, who knows only dumplings,
- have no choice but to create a thousand worlds with dumplings.

Page 19

Old man: Mister.
- Have you come to my shop a thousand times? You're probably tired of it.

Gintoki: Nonsense. I'm not tired of it... I'm not tired of it, but
- My stomach is totally full, so I don't have a bag to put it in.
[Note: This is a pun. Bag = "bukuro", and stomach = "ibukuro".]

Old man: Put it in your balls bag.

Small text 1: Gin-saaaan!
Small text 2: Ow ow ow.

Old man: If there are things you understand for the first time after doing various things,
- You can also see things for the first time after stubbornly doing only one thing.
[sorry, I know that sentence is a mess, but I don't know how to word it concisely in English...]
Handwritten text: *kiss*

Old man: Right, mister?

Gintoki: ...Yeah.
- It really is tough being in the analog group.
[okay, so this "analog group" (アナログ派) term was brought up a few times, and I'm not sure if I should leave it the way it is, or change it to "old-fashioned" or something, so the meaning is clearer?]

Translation: Gintama 108

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 06:01:40 +0000

Page 01

TV: The Edo!!

Kusano: Good afternoon, this is Kusano Hitoyoshi.
- We have a scoop. The Edo's coverage team has succeeded in making contact with an important Joui Roushi.
(Text under Kusano: Kusano Hitoyoshi)

Kusano: Hanano Ana.
Hanano: Yes, this is the person I've attempted to cover on the spot this time...

Hanano: Among the mob of Joui Roushi, he stands out prominently.
- Elusive, ever-changing, helper of the weak, crusher of the strong -- the last samurai. / While wanted by the Bakufu, he is highly popular among the people of Edo.
(Text by Hanano: Hanano Saki)

Page 02

Hanano: Known by the nickname "Nobleman of Madness", he is K-san.
- He has agreed to let us cover him for one day under the use of a pseudonym, since he is wanted by the police.

Hanano: The truth behind the veiled activities of the Joui Roushi will now be uncovered.
- What do they see in this country's future? What are they trying to achieve? The Edo's exclusive scoop "Dawn of Japan" special!! The Nobleman of Madness one day report!
(Text in the middle: Dawn of Japan Special / Nobleman of Madness One Day Report!!)

Chapter 108: Delicious Sticks unexpectedly make you full

Hanano: Nice to meet you, I'm Hanano from Ooedo TV.
Katsura: Hello.
Hanano: Thank you for complying with our report.
Text on bottom: In accoradance with his request, we have altered part of his voice.

Page 03

Hanano: Umm, let me confirm this / You're the Nobleman of Madness, K-san.
Katsura: It's not K-san, it's Katsura.

Hanano: No, um... You said to please use a pseudonym...
Katsura: Oh, is that so. Put in a beep then.
Hanano: All right, we'll put in a beep.
Katsura: It's not beep, it's Katsura.
Hanano: Oh, forget it.

Hanano: Um... There's a mosaic on your face, so you probably won't be exposed.
Katsura: A mosaic? What? There's a mosaic on my face right now? / Take it off at once. It's outrageous to treat a person's face like pornography.

Hanano: No... you see, we're trying to pay attention to your needs.
Katsura: Don't bother. I'm telling you to take it off. Who do you think I am?

Katsura: I'm a master of disguise. Even now, I'm in a disguise. / I'm known as "Running Kotarou", so I won't expose my identity so easily.
Hanano: Is that so. I'm sorry. We'll remove the mosaic then.

Page 04

Hanano: Umm, well, let's move on to questions. K-san... I mean, Katsura-san
- Why did you comply with this one day report?

Katsura: First, I wanted people to understand what we Joui Shishi are.
- Many scorn and fear us as terrorists.

Katsura: It's true that there are those among us who are like thieves.
Ikumatsu: Here you go.
Hanano: Ah, thank you.
Katsura: But that is only one portion.

Katsura: The majority grieve for this country and want to change it somehow.
- I want people to understand that we are loyal and patriotic samurai.

Katsura: Second is

Katsura: Second is um... huh?

Page 05

Katsura: Oh, it's too hard to eat with this on.
(Small text: The mustache is in the way.)
Hanano: ...Katsura-san!? /

Hanano: Umm... your face... is completely exposed...
Katsura: Ikumatsu-dono, may I have something to go with the ramen, like tea?
Ikumatsu: This is a ramen shop, if you want to drink tea then go to a tea house.

Katsura: Ah, she got mad at me.
(Ikumatsu small text: Geez, bringing groups of people into someone's house.)
Hanano: No, it's not that... your face... oh, forget it.

Katsura: So where were we...
Hanano: Um, the second reason for your compliance with this report...
Katsura: Ah, yes, yes, the second reason... Umm...

Katsura: There is no second reason, one is fine.
Hanano: ...Ah, is that so.

Hanano: Well then, since you want people to understand the Joui Shishi's activities through TV, / you wanted each viewer to think about what he or she can do for this country... Is it okay to assume that?
Katsura: Ah, that's the second reason. That's what I wanted to say.
Hanano: Wait a minute... Please don't take my answer.

Page 06

Katsura: Elizabeth!!

Katsura: What happened!?
Hanano: What's going on? A mysterious creature has just crashed into the report scene!
Katsura: It's not a mysterious creature, it's Elizabeth!!

Okita: Kaaaatsura!!
- The game's over today!!

Hanano: It's the Shinsengumi!!
- What an occurance! It appears that they have discovered the report scene!!

Page 07

Katsura: ...And that's the start of a busy day.
- It's just the right time; we should leave now.
Hanano: Eh!? This was in your schedule!?

Katsura: Everyone, we'll be escaping from the second floor...
- The cameramen should come later so the pathway won't be blocked.
Ikumatsu: Heeeey, why are people rudely bursting in like this?

Hanano: Katsura-san, you seem very used to this. Is this a daily occurance!?
Katsura: Well, yes.
- They come at any time and place. Frequently when I'm eating or sleeping.

Katsura: They're trying to target me when I'm defenseless, but unfortunately for them, I have no openings. / Even if they attack me while I'm eating, I have "Delicious Sticks" on me. This is corn potage flavor.
Hanano: ...I like corn potage flavor too.
[Note: Delicious Sticks are a Japanese snack. Similar to Cheetos in consistency, they come in a wide variety of flavors.]

Katsura: When men are born into this world, they must live with preparations to die.
(Small text: We'll escape from here.)
- If you're prepared for anything, you can always remain calm. No matter what happens, you won't be afraid.

Shisengumi: Kaaaatsuraaaa!!

Page 08

Katsura: Uwaaaaaaa!!

Hanano: ...Katsura-san, you just said "Uwaaaaa" right now.
Katsura: It was a battle cry. I meant to say "Uoryaaa".
Hanano: No, you were clearly frightened...

Shinsengumi: Kaaaatsuraaaa!!
Hanano: They're coming from that side too!!

Katsura: Delicious Stick
- Corn Potage!!

Page 09

Hanano: We managed to escape somehow.
Katsura: Well, this is just a morning warm-up.

Hanano: What an intense morning. Just the feeling of Joui Shishi...
- Um... Katsura-san, can you not descend from the roof?
Katsura: I won't. When you become like me, you'll be discovered right away walking normally on the roads.
Hanano: Katsura-san? You said you were a master of disguise. That... doesn't match up at all.

Katsura: Look.
Hanano: Katsura-san, are you ignoring me?
Katsura: There are people walking on the roofs everywhere. Those are generally Joui Shishi. Heeey, good morning!

Hanano: ...Katsura-san, he's completely ignoring you. He's clearly just a carpenter.
Katsura: Hahaha, that Gosaku! He must have fought with his wife again.

Katsura: Sorry I'm late.
Men: Katsura-san, good morning!

Page 10

Katsura: There are cameras here today, but don't worry about them. There are mosaics on your faces.
Hanano: Katsura-san, what is this?
Katsura: It's a place for Joui Shishi to exchange information. / We report the results of our activities here.

Katsura: By the way, the snacks we have at this time are Delicious Sticks salami flavor. / Hanano: Salami flavor? I like that too.

Katsura: In short, the Joui Roushi's activities basically consist of this exchange of information.
- We exchange all kinds of information gathered from various places, especially about the state of the universe and the Bakufu's secrets.
Small text 1: No, I won't approve of that!
Small text 2: They're definitely going out!
Katsura: After exchanging this information, we gradually elevate the place of exchange. In other words, we exchange opinions with and try to persuade people in high ranks. With time, we will change this country from the inside.

Man 1: I said they're not going out!! There's no way Yada Akimi-chan would go out with a guy like that!
Man 2: Miyabe! Look at reality. Men hate Oshio Gakuto, but it's true that he's popular among women!
[Note: Yada Akimi is a parody of actress Yada Akiko. Oshio Gakuto is a parody of actor Oshio Manabu.]

Hanano: ...Katsura-san, is that the state of the universe? Those are names I've heard in celebrity scandals...
Katsura: Cut it out, you guys!!

Katsura: I quite like Oshio Gakuto! He's rather wild!! He resembles a young Hino Shouhei...
[Note: Hino Shouhei is an actor.]
Okita: Kaaaatsuraaa!!

Page 11

Men: It's the Shinsengumi!!
Katsura: Delicious Stick salami!!

Hanano: Katsura-saaaan!! Again!?
Katsura: That's how the meeting ends every time.
Hanano: This is also according to schedule!? Katsura-san, just how many times a day are you attacked!?

Katsura: For some reason, they always appear just as I reach the meeting place. Thanks to them, I can't exchange information well.
- They're such an annoying bunch.
Hanano: You're the most annoying!! You're clearly being followed! You brought the group from this morning with you!!

Katsura: Gosakuuu! Run away right now! They're coming!
Hanano: I said that's not Gosaku!!

Hanano: We managed to escape somehow. ...I'm really tired.
Katsura: The real show starts now.
- Next, I'll go meet an important person and show you my attempt to persuade him.

Page 12

Hanano: Important person!? Who is that?
Katsura: A man we must have.

Sfx: *ding dong*

Gintoki: I said I don't have the rent!!

Hanano: Katsura-saaaan!!
Katsura: Fufu. Gintoki, today I'll have you say yes.

Katsura: You have a destiny to fight with me.
Small text: Ahh, the door is messed up.
Katsura: Why not change this rotten world together?

Katsura: It won't be easy, but you and I can do it.
Gintoki: It's fixed.

Page 13

Hanano: Katsura-san, how is it going!?
Katsura: Well, it was an okay feeling. But I lacked a decisive blow.

Katsura: Hanano Ana-dono, can you get that out of my bag? It's my trump card.
- In terms of strategy, the one who shows his hand first loses. The one who saves his trump card until the last moment wins.
Small text by Kagura: Heeheehee
Sfx: *rummaging*
Katsura: Ah, yes, that.

Katsura: Fufufu. Gintoki, will you still retain that attitude after seeing this?
Sfx: *crunch crunch*
Hanano: Katsura-san, your trump card, the chocolate bar Delicious Stick, has been stolen.

Katsura: What!?
Sfx: *clatter*

Shinpachi: Oh, hello.
Katsura: Oh, hello...

Katsura: ...Eh? No, no, you don't need to make tea.
- Sorry, please don't mind me.
Hanano: What did you come here for!?

Shinsengumi: Kaaaatsura!!
Sfx: *clatter*

Page 14

Katsura: Ngooooo!! They're here again!? / Hanano: Katsura-san, hurry, hurry!
[sorry, I don't know how to phrase that "Ngoooo" in English...]
Katsura: I can't remove my head; there will be a hole in the door and Gintoki will get mad at me.
Hanano: Do you plan to live here forever!?

Sfx: *thud* *thud*

Shinsengumi: They're on top! They ran on top!!

Katsura: Hanano Ana-dono, next I'd like to take a leisurely walk in a place connected to me, and then cry over a close friend's unexpected letter. I want to go with that "Want to come to my house!?" kind of flow, but what do you think?
Hanano: What are you talking about!?

Katsura: Don't tell me, you don't have a letter prepared.
Hanano: Of course not! I have zero interest in your friend!
Katsura: Hmph, that's what I thought, so I prepared it. Please read it at a suitable time. I spent all night writing it.
Hanano: You wrote it!? *That* makes me want to cry!!

Hanano: I don't want to do this anymore! My body can't take it!!
Sfx: *smack*
Small text: Gyaaaaa
Katsura: This is the Joui Shishi's way of life; make sure to film it well.
Hanano: I've been annoyed since awhile ago! Those cameras are old!!

Page 15

Katsura: Hey, cameramen, you filmed my leap just now, right!?
Cameramen: Perfectly, Katsura-san!!

Someone: Huh?

Hanano: Kyaaaaaa!!

Katsura: Hanano Ana...
- Please tell the country's citizens what the Joui Shishi are like.

Page 16

Katsura: I leave it to you.

Hanano: Katsura-saaaaaan!!

Okita: Goodbye, Katsura.

Shinsengumi: Okita-san, look at that!!

Page 17

Katsura: Bye-bii~

Shinsengumi: Old!!
- He's too old-fashionsed!!

Okita: Hey! Don't move, woman.

Okita: You're Katsura's comrade, aren't you.
Hanano: No, I'm here on a report --
Okita: Don't lie. Come over here.

Hanano: No...

Okita: What's this?
Hanano: Katsura-san's...

Page 18

- To the Shinsengumi
- I know it's odd to ask this of an enemy, but please don't harm the woman in front of you.

- She's just a journalist; I forced her to come cover me.
- She has absolutely no connection to me.

- Although an enemy, as someone who also wishes to see the smiles of the people of Edo...
- As someone who lives faithfully as a samurai, I believe in you.

- Hanano Ana-dono
- I was impressed by your attempt to report the truth in spite of all the dangers you faced.

- Although in a different form, you are without a doubt a patriot who protects the peace of Edo.
- We are comrades. Please work hard in your job. I'll watch TV every day. Katsura Kotaro.

- P.S.

Page 19

- The Shinsengumi
- Should die after all.
Man: Okita-san, there's something ticking in the envelope.
Okita: What is this?

Sfx: *boom*

Hanano: His distinguishing feature is his long hair.
- This annoying long hair.

Hanano: If you see this face, call the police right away.
- Dieeeeeee, Katsuraaaaa!!

Translation: Gintama 173

Wed, 18 Jul 2007 08:50:13 +0000

Hi everyone, this is my first post here. I was encouraged by Silver_Sea to post translations here for Gintama, so here I am. :) This is the latest chapter, 173. Any corrections/suggestions woiuld be greatly appreciated.

Gintama Chapter 173

Page 01

Man: Hey, did you hear?
Man: That Takasugi guy had a fight with the Shinsengumi.
Man: It seems that he sent a spy into the Shinsengumi to disturb the troops, and tried to take Chief Kondou's head during the confusion.
Man: But it just ended with the Shinsengumi and Kiheitai fighting each other.
Man: Guys who don't know anything except how to wield a sword should just fight it out.
Man: We aim to achieve a supreme bloodless revolution, so of course the Shinsengumi is our enemy, but so is the military faction's Takasugi.
Man: But a spy, huh... We need to be careful as well. We don't know where the enemy's spies lurk.
Yamazaki: Um, excuse me.

Page 02

Men: Wh... Who are you!?
Yamazaki: Pl... please wait a minute.
Yamazaki: I'm not anyone suspicious.
Man: Who are you? State your name!!
Yamazaki: Umm... For samurai to carry swords in this age of sword prohibition...
Yamazaki: I suppose you must be the Joui Shishi who are moved to work because of the country's state.
Man: ...What do you want?
Yamazaki: Please!!
Yamazaki: Can you...
Yamazaki: Can you let me join the Joui Shishi?

Chapter 173: Life is an exam

Page 03

Yamazaki: The most dangerous job among spy missions
Yamazaki: is said to be an infiltration investigation.
Yamazaki: To slip into the enemy's interior, to eat and sleep with them, and to send that secret information to your allies.
Yamazaki: The profit can be large, but if you fail, the loss will be large as well.
Yamazaki: Therefore, the person who carries out this mission must be the most skilled amongst spies.
Yamazaki: While exposing his life to the enemy's naked blade, he must have the intrepidity to not let his face change color one bit.
Yamazaki: While in the enemy's camp, where not even a tiny mistake will be forgiven, he must have the sensitivity to carry out his job as accurately as possible.
Yamazaki: He must also have...

Page 04

Yamazaki: The overwhelming plainness that melts into everything.
Yamazaki: No one in the Shinsengumi possesses these traits besides Yamazaki Sagaru.
Yamazaki: To think that the Joui had infiltrated this town.
Yamazaki: The underground city Akiba Neo.
Yamazaki: It is referred to as the otaku's holy land. Edo's greatest mechanics town. With booths lined up messily along the labyrinth-like streets, it's true that this may be the perfect town to hide in.

Page 05

Yamazaki: The Nobleman of Madness.
Yamazaki: Katsura Kotarou.
Yamazaki: Somehow, I need to approach him and find the location of their headquarters
Yamazaki: And then arrest all of the Joui Roushi at once.
Katsura: I see.

Page 06

Katsura: All right then.
Katsura: Your interview will begin now.
Yamazaki: ...Huh?
Katsura: Take out your resume.
Yamazaki: ...Huh? Um... Do you have to pass an interview to become a Joui Shishi?
Katsura: It's a guard against spies. We cannot entrust our backs to people of unknown backgrounds in battle.
Yamazaki: What's up with that? Why do terrorists have an interview?
Yamazaki: I... I'm sorry, I forgot my resume. But my greiving heart for the country should not lose to anyone.
Katsura: No, I don't care about that, I need your resume.
Katsura: I'm going to ask this bluntly, but do you have any common sense?
Katsura: Normally, it's natural for someone bring their resume when job hunting.
Katsura: It's natural to come in a recruiting suit. What did you come here for?
Yamazaki: Job hunting!? I'm job hunting!?

Page 07

Katsura: This doesn't apply to just us, any company is the same. They all say the same thing.
Yamazaki: This isn't a company.
Katsura: Also, you sat down before I told you to. Usually, you should sit down when the interviewer says "Sit down."
Yamazaki: I... I'm sorry.
Katsura: Even though this society is said to emphasize education, every employer wants people with common sense.
Katsura: Work is something that anyone will remember eventually if they do it.
Maids: Welcome back, Master.
(Small text: If you pay a special fee, you can play with the maids.)
Katsura: I'm not Master, I'm Katsura.
Yamazaki: I don't want to be told that by you!! Why do I have to be lectured by a guy who conducts interviews in a maid cafe!?

Page 08

Katsura: Well anyway, common sense is essential for Joui Shishi.
Katsura: Revolutionaries destroy common sense. That is why revolutionaries must understand common sense more than anyone else.
(Small text: Rock paper scissors, look that way!)
Katsura: You need to keep that in mind if you become a Joui Shishi.
Katsura: Well then, the interview is over now.
Katsura: Hey, take him.
Yamazaki: Huh? I thought I was done for already, but... it seems that I might be able to do it?
Yamazaki: Even though he said it was an interview, it was really more like an introduction to each other.
Yamazaki: That's right, there's no way terrorists would have something like an interview.
Man: Let's go.
Yamazaki: Ah, okay.
Yamazaki: Thank goodness~ It seems that I've succeeded in infiltrating.

Page 09

Sign: Joui Shishi Employment Exam Hall
Yamazaki: Why do terrorists have to take an exam!?!
Yamazaki: On top of an interview, this time it's an exam!?
Yamazaki: It's no different from a normal job!! This is weird!! Really weird!!

Page 10

Yamazaki: This is bad. I never thought that becoming a Joui Shishi would be so hard.
Yamazaki: What kind of questions are going to be on the test!? I haven't studied at all!! What kind of studying has everyone done!?
Man: Hey, did you study? I'm in trouble, I didn't study at all. I'm totally going to fail. This is bad.
Yamazaki: He totally pulled an all-nighter studying!! A class always has a guy like him.
Katsura: All right, be quiet.
Katsura: Well then, the Joui Shishi Employment Exam will now begin.
Katsura: Close your textbooks. It's too late to cram now!
Katsura: You can't win against people who study regularly.
Yamazaki: What's with the textbook?
Yamazaki: What would you study?
Katsura: All right, look at this.
Katsura: Starting now, the questions will appear on the screen one by one.
Katsura: Use the panel in front of you to answer the question.
Katsura: You will have three minutes to answer each question. After the question, the correct answer will be announced.

Page 11

Katsura: An exam official will be watching in the back, so don't try to be cunning.
Katsura: Please do your best.
Katsura: So then
Katsura: Exam start!

Question #1: Write down the way to read this kanji.
Kanji: Shinsengumi

Yamazaki: What is this!?
Yamazaki: It's really easy!!
Katsura: Common sense is essential to the Joui Shishi.
Yamazaki: I see!! Even though he says it's a test, it's just a question to measure your common sense!
Yamazaki: Even I can pass this without having studied! The answer is simple, "Shinsengumi."
Katsura: Okay, time's up.
Katsura: The answer is here.

Page 12

Correct answer: Scum
Katsura: The answer is "Scum."
Yamazaki: What planet's common sense is this!?
Katsura: This is common sense among us Shishi. Other answers that will be specially accepted are "Idiots", "Trash", and "They've been appearing too much recently".
Random guy: Yeah, I got it right!
Yamazaki: Do the Joui usually call us that!?
Man: Che, a trap, huh.
(Man's answer: "Maeragumi")
Yamazaki: You just plain got it wrong, what did you pull an all-nighter studying for?
Yamazaki: This won't work, even if I answer with common sense I won't get it right.
Yamazaki: I have to answer like a terrorist.
Katsura: Now the second question.

Question #2: Write down the way to read this kanji.
Kanji: Shogun

Page 13

Yamazaki: Normally, the answer would be "Shogun", but these guys are terrorists. The shogun is the enemy's boss. Which means... This has to be right.
Yamazaki's answer: Pervert
Katsura: The correct answer is
Katsura: Matsudaira Ken.
Yamazaki: Why is a kanji being read with kanji!?
Katsura: This is common sense among Shishi. Other correct answers include "Hooligan" and "Daichi Mao's former husband". [Daichi Mao is an actress who used to be married to actor Matsudaira Ken.]
Yamazaki: Why are there people getting these questions right!? What kind of brains do they have!?
Katsura: Next is question three. Write the following word in kanji.

Word: Jackie Chan

Yamazaki: There's no longer any connection to the Joui! Jackie!? I don't know, this is just hard!
Katsura: The correct answer is
Katsura: "Nose".
Yamazaki: That's just because you're concerned about Jackie's nose!!
Katsura: This is common sense among Shishi.
Katsura: Other correct answers include "Chair" and "Saeba Ryou was really strong". [saeba Ryou is a character in City Hunter.]
Yamazaki: The last part is just your impression!! Don't talk about City Hunter!!

Page 14

Katsura: That's all for Japanese. The next questions will be on math.
Yamazaki: This is bad. I still haven't gotten a single question right.
Yamazaki: But for math, no matter how hard it is, if you use formulas you should definitely arrive at the answer.

Question #4: Ten Shisengumi and six Joui Shishi run into each other on the road.
Three Joui Shishi are cut down by the Shinsengumi.
Undauntedly, the Joui Shishi cut down two Shinsengumi.
In the chaotic fight, two more Shinsengumi are injured, but six reinforcements arrive.
Two Joui Shishi are cut down.

Page 15

How many noses does Jackie have?

Yamazaki: One, obviously!
Yamazaki: How much is Jackie going to be pulled in!? You don't need all that stuff about the fight!
Katsura: This question is quite difficult, so you'll have more time.
Katsura: Think about it carefully for one hour.
Yamazaki: That's unncessary!!
Yamazaki: No... Wait... There've been many questions with traps so far.
Yamazaki: If Jackie was in this fight...
Yamazaki: If in the middle of the fight
Yamazaki: ...Jackie's nose got cut off....

Page 16

Katsura: The correct answer is one.
Yamazaki's answer: Zero
Yamazaki: I completely fell for the trap!
Yamazaki: I read into it too deeply and let the correct answer get away.
Man: Che, a trap, huh.
Man's answer: 134
Yamazaki: Just what were you trapped by!?
Katsura: That's it for math.
Yamazaki: That wasn't math.
Katsura: Next is a question on foreign language.

Question #5: Translate the article below.

Yamazaki: What language is this!!? I can't read it at all!! What planet's language is this!?
Yamazaki: An illustration... That's right, an illustration!!
Yamazaki: This illustration must depict the content of the article... I have no choice but to rely on this illustration and translate by intuition!

Page 17

Yamazaki: No matter how you look at it, this is an illustration of a battlefield.
Yamazaki: One person is on the verge of death, and the other person is leaning down to hear his words. There's no doubt.
Yamazaki: There's something in his hand!?
Yamazaki: Paper!?
Yamazaki: No, a photo!!

Yamazaki's translation:
"Leave me alone and run away, you damn insect!!"
The sargeant's body quickly grew cold in my arms. The face of the demon teacher, who was so terrifying and hateful, now seemed kind.
"You're not going to listen to a superior's orders, damn insect!? Say 'I'm a damn insect', you damn insect!!"
"Teacher, I'm a damn insect. Just like a damn insect, I lived on after being abandoned by my parents. No one would mourn the death of a damn insect like me. Please let me do as I like."
"What a coincidence, damn insect!! When I took up arms, I abandoned my family. There isn't anyone who would mourn for me."
Then the sargeant slowly took out a bloodstained photo from his inner pocket.
"But you're different. Someone who would mourn for you... is right here."
In the photo was my mother from when she was still young and healthy. Next to her was the sargeant holding a baby.
"Say that I'm a damn insect too... son."
"Teacher is... a damn insect. A damn insect's... precious... damn father!!"
The sargeant smiled and then stopped moving.

Yamazaki: All right!!
Yamazaki: This should definitely work.
Katsura: Time's up.
Katsura: Now the correct answer...

Page 18

Answer: Isn't Jackie's nose really big?
Katsura: Is this.
Yamazaki: It was a photo of Jackie!?
Yamazaki: How long of an article do you need to describe Jackie's nose anyway!?
Man: You got it wrong, but I was moved.
Yamazaki: Don't look at someone else's answer!! I'm really embarassed!!
Katsura: Now this is the last question.
Yamazaki: The last one already!? Almost all of them have been about Jackie!!

Question #6: Write your motive for wanting to become a Joui Shishi in the Kamuchakka language.
Random guy: Huh!? Kamuchakka language!?
Random guy 2: That's impossible!! There's no way I can write in such a difficult language!!
Katsura: It's a hard question, so if you answer correctly you'll pass with this one question.
Random guy 2: It's impossible, impossible.
Yamazaki: It's over... Mission failed... The vice chief will beat me up.

Page 19

Yamazaki: I'll just answer randomly.
Katsura: There was one person who answered correctly.
Katsura: Exam number eleven.
Yamazaki: But I answered randomly!!
Yamazaki: Seriously!?
Yamazaki: So this means I can fulfill my mission!! Yeeesssss!! I did it!!
Katsura: Let's look at his answer as an example of a correct answer.
Katsura: If you translate it
Katsura: It says, "I came here on an infiltration investigation. I'll beat every single Joui Roushi bastard down to hell."
Yamazaki: Huh!?