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Naruto 296

Chapter 296 twisted beyond recognition

en
+ posted by Iwanin as translation on Feb 23, 2006 22:23 | Go to Naruto

-> RTS Page for Naruto 296

I was bored and high on coffee, alright  :darn. Plus, this is my last chapter for the foreseable future (if you can *call* it a chapter).  :noworry

And yes, each line constitutes an actual speech bubble, so it's perfectly scanlatable. If you have an equally twisted sense of humor, feel free to scanlate this without my express permission. Just be sure to show it to me if you do,  :p

Chapter 296: Homoerotica + shameless plug!

Page 1.

Kabuto: If you're reading School of Water Business... (http://www.tamascans.net/projects/SOWB.html)

Kabuto: You know that the only way to calm a frisky male down...requires 1,000 strokes! *Kukuku*

Sakura: Naruto...

Page 2.

Yamato: OMG, she's going for the thousand strokes!

Orochimaru: A thousand strokes? From a girl? Oh, yuck!

Page 3.

SFX Bubble: *Farty sound FX*

Naruto: Oooga-booga!!!!!

Page 4.

Kabuto: But you know...

Kabuto: You may well do 5 or 10 thousand strokes and it won't matter!

Naruto (flashback): I'll bring Sasuke home no matter what*!

Naruto (flashback): It's a life-long promise*!

Naruto (flashback): Sakura-chan... I...*

Naruto (flashback): I'll keep my promise no matter what*!

Naruto (flashback): I don't go back on my words...*

Naruto (flashback) That's my "way of the Ninja"*!

*ALL ACTUAL LINES.

Kabuto: That's right... he's in love with Sasuke...!

Page 5.

Naruto: Sasukeeeeee!

Kabuto: Face it: he's gay.

Yamato: Stop, Sakura!

Yamato: Didn't Kabuto just spell it out for you! HE'S GAY!

Page 6.

Sakura: Naruto!

Sakura: I'll... I'll do my best!

Sakura: I'll give you 20 thousand strokes on a daily basis!

Sakura: So please... forget about Sasuke!

Yamato: Fuck*!

*Close enough to actual line.

Page 7.

Sai: She's making him come out of the closet...

Page 8.

Sai: I, however, am fond of closets...

Orochimaru: Shit*!

*No, this is not what he actually said.

Orochimaru: Man, I can't take it anymore...

Orochimaru: Going weeks without SasukeLUV's driving me nuts...

Orochimaru: Gotta hav'im play with my little snake...

Orochimaru: Oh, well.

Orochimaru: Gotta hold it for now...

Page 9.

Orochimaru: Hold your horses... Hold your horses*!

*This is actually a more literal translation than "patience". "Gaman" means to control your impulses - thus, patience is only one of its many potential meanings. YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP, PEOPLE!!!!

Orochimaru: Hold them for Sasuke-kun!

Kabuto: *Ouch*!

Sakura: *Sniff*...*sniff*...

Naruto: Not... Sasuke...

Page 10.

Yamato: You know, I'm getting tired of this myself.

Page 11.

Yamato: Hold it right there, four-eyes!

Kabuto: Oh, puh-lease. I may be gay myself, but gimme a little credit.

Kabuto: Who'd wanna stroke *that* thing?

Yamato: Sakura.

Page 12.

Kabuto: Yeah, but she's fucking crazy.

Kabuto: I mean, seriously..

Kabuto: First Sasuke and now Naruto? You think she's at least have the sense to fall for a heterosexual male. Sure, Naruto's got no sense of fashion, but he's still gay.

Sakura: Naruto...

Page 13.

Naruto: Sasukeeeee!!!!!!!

Kabuto: You just can't judge a book by its cover. That's the moral of the story.

Kabuto: 'course with Orochimaru-Sama, it's pretty damned obvious what *he's* into...

Yamato: I feel constipated!

Page 14.

Yamato: Gotta be quick!

Yamato: Hokage knock off jutsu...

Yamato: Talk-to-the-hand-bitch no jutsu!

Page 15.

Naruto: Sasuke?

Page 16.

Sakura: Naruto.

Naruto: Not Sasukeeee!!!!!

Sai: Good evening, Orochimaru-Sama. Lord Danzou sent me to be your man-slave.

Sai: Please use me as you see fit!

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#1. by njt (Last Boss ♪~( ̄。 ̄))
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
haha, that is twisted... beyond recognition... even for your standards :p but it's always fun for a good laugh :ossu

#2. by Galth (Puella Magi)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
Haha, this just HAS to be used for a scanlation!

Btw, finally decided to cut the 'pretend to be an actual scanlation' stuff ;) it's still the best one around so far :p

:ossu
#3. by Gold Knight (MH Senpai)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
Iwanin, you're despicable, man! XD
#4. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
Quote by Gold Knight :

Iwanin, you're despicable, man!  XD


I know - it's seishun. :D
#5. by lexiefaye (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
LOL. I needed that after 7 hours on various forums. Puts it all in perspective.

Favorite part = Page 6

Quote:
Page 6.

Sakura: Naruto!

Sakura: I'll... I'll do my best!

Sakura: I'll give you 20 thousand strokes on a daily basis!

Sakura: So please... forget about Sasuke!

Yamato: Fuck*!

*Close enough to actual line.
#6. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
Quote by Khaludh :

Btw, finally decided to cut the 'pretend to be an actual scanlation' stuff ;) it's still the best one around so far :p


Seishun >>>>> Kishi.
#7. by Hamsun (Intl Translator)
Posted on Feb 23, 2006
Great.
#8. by Yumi-Chan (Translator)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Waaaii~ Another great Iwa-sama translation~ :clap ^________^
#9. by dylec (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Quote:
Yamato: Hokage knock off jutsu...

Yamato: Talk-to-the-hand-bitch no jutsu!

Haha, this is hilarious.
This translation is sure twisted. ;D
#10. by Galth (Puella Magi)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Iwanin-sensei >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> T3h w0r1d!!!11
#11. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Quote by Khaludh :

Iwanin-baasan >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> T3h w0r1d!!!11


'who you callin' grandma, bitch! :mad

... *lol*... seems my insanity's sparked even more insanity. :smile-big
#12. by Miso (MH Senpai)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
:loool
Always the best....;)
#13. by Galth (Puella Magi)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Quote by Iwanin :

'who you callin' grandma, bitch!  :mad

... *lol*... seems my insanity's sparked even more insanity.  :smile-big


Hmmz, i thought it meant something like 'respected elder' and san/sama aren't the difference between male and female? if i said -(baa)san it would then mean something like -grandFATHER right? I was merely misinformed then *bows and changes the explanation text in the Chiyo introduction chapter by Inane*
#14. by Hermie (vs. The World.)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
*humps Iwanin ferociously*



<3
#15. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Quote by Khaludh :

Hmmz, i thought it meant something like 'respected elder' and san/sama aren't the difference between male and female? if i said -(baa)san it would then mean something like -grandFATHER right? I was merely misinformed  then *bows and changes the explanation text in the Chiyo introduction chapter by Inane*


(o)nii - older brother.
(a)nee - older sister.
oba- aunt.
oji - uncle.
(o)baa - grandma.
(o)jii - granpa.
baba - old hag.
jiji - geezer.

They were showing respect to Chiyo because of the "Sama" ending in "baa-Sama", not because of the "baa" (which is gender specific, too).  :)

And Hermie... no humping, please ... >_< ....
#16. by Galth (Puella Magi)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
Thanks for teaching me, Granny Iwa... jiji = geezer? That explains some things about Kuwa ;)
#17. by Mizura (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
XD XD X'D

That is the best translation Ever! Give up Sakura, Sasuke is gay! X'D

But Sakura's good at basic academy techniques. She could always attempt to henge into a male. Better yet, as a world-class medic, sex-change! @_@

Quote:
(a)nee - older sister.
I thought it was (o)nee? ?_?
#18. by Kuwa-Jiji (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
All these Iwanin-sensei and Iwanin-sama saying. They're idolizing you too much iwanin. <.<
#19. by Tanuki-dono (MH Senpai)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
*hides her giggling* Shame on you, I~wa~nin!
#20. by NaruJunky (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
it's hilarious ... well done
#21. by Leen (MH's Peacemaker)
Posted on Feb 24, 2006
:clap Wonderful translation!!!!!!! <3

Iwanin's the BEST!! :ossu
#22. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 28, 2006
Quote by Mizura :

XD XD X'D

That is the best translation Ever! Give up Sakura, Sasuke is gay! X'D

But Sakura's good at basic academy techniques. She could always attempt to henge into a male. Better yet, as a world-class medic, sex-change! @_@
I thought it was (o)nee? ?_?


Oh! My lapsus!

See, "Ane" and "Ani" are "older brother" and "older sister". But when using the honorific/term-of-endearment form, it's "(o)nii" and "(o)nee". It's these last two terms, ironically, which are applied to strangers.

In other words, while "ane" is litterally "older sister", nee-san is what you might call your older sister - and any relatively young female stranger (GRRRR! ;) )

So the wires got crossed as I was typing.

Anyway, I'm typing this today because I was off at nii-san's wedding and I barely got back. 'sorry 'bout that. :p
#23. by xallisto (Registered User)
Posted on Feb 28, 2006
from my understanding

- San is kinda like mr/miss - Although Dono probably fits better for Mr/Miss

- Sama is more like sir/madam

- Kaa-San mother

- Jii-San Father

- Baa-San Grandmother

- Ojii-San Grandfather

- Nii-San Brother

- Nee-San Sister

My Japanese is rather poor so this probably arnt 100% right

Edit - Stupid home page why does it direct to the 1st page of a thread when its marked latest posts
#24. by Iwanin (Translator)
Posted on Feb 28, 2006
Quote by xallisto :

- San is kinda like mr/miss - Although Dono probably fits better for Mr/Miss

- Sama is more like sir/madam

- Kaa-San mother

- Jii-San Father

- Baa-San Grandmother

- Ojii-San Grandfather

- Nii-San Brother

- Nee-San Sister

My Japanese is rather poor so this probably arnt 100% right


We're going to hafta do a FAQ page on common Japanese terms ;) . In the meantime, we should keep discussions like these to the "meet the translators" subforum. I'm answering this one in the Iwanin thread.
#25. by Anax (Schrödinger's cat)
Posted on Mar 9, 2006
Hmm, in Gungrave, Kugashira Bunji...
...calls Brandon Heat, "aniki", though he a) isn't his brother b) is a total stranger. Why not call him "niisan", like Konohamaru does with Naruto? And what's with "Aniki" and "Ani"? Is there an "Aneki" too? Tellmetellmetellme :nuts
#26. by xallisto (Registered User)
Posted on Mar 10, 2006
i think its because of the Gangasta like organisation there in they think of themselves as a big family with big daddy protecting them, i think thats why he calls him aniki.

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Translations of this Chapter

Date Chapter Language Translator
Feb 23, 2006 296 en KON
Feb 25, 2006 296 en HisshouBuraiKen
Feb 23, 2006 296 en njt
Feb 23, 2006 296 en ratfox
Feb 23, 2006 296 en Ryoma_Echizen
Feb 24, 2006 296 en Yumi-Chan
Feb 24, 2006 296 it Axass
Feb 23, 2006 296 de babel
Feb 23, 2006 296 es holahola
Feb 23, 2006 296 nl kadodo
Feb 23, 2006 296 fr lolomaru
Feb 23, 2006 296 fr MaggeuS
Feb 23, 2006 296 nl ShgnLW
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