Detroit Metal City
-> RTS Page for Detroit Metal City 37
Black text: After the live, in the Dezumu dressing room...
D: Hey, Tsuyoshi, on the stage back there, why didn't you crawl under my ass like everyone else? (*T/L Note: Just to let readers know, all the members of Dezumu speak in a thick Kansai dialect, which is prevalent in the Osaka/Kyoto area of Japan.)
D: Eat my shit!
C: That's Dezumu's "Death God Bowel Movement!"
D: I said, why didn't you get under my ass, bitch?!
D: Unless all the members are involved in the "Death God Bowel Movement," it won't be complete!!
?: Calm down, Togashi...it's necessary that Tsuyoshi has the proper preparation of the heart.
?: This isn't the time to be fighting amongst ourselves!!
D: Next, we'll finally battle against DMC. Summon up your fighting spirit...
D: When was the first time we encountered them...?
Black: Years earlier...
D: A map of blood created with the Death God's judgement! That is our paradise!!
D: Darkness covers the light, the sun scorches humans, demons come to life!
D: Back when Dezumu was still just a generic death metal band!!
D: Hey, look at this, Tsuyoshi!!
D: There's article written about us in this month's Bone!
T: You serious? Hold on a minute, Togashi!!
D: From that point on...Tsuyoshi had diarrhea, and I was constipated.
T: Ohhh, you weren't kidding! "The death metal band "Dezumu" that sticks with traditions!! Could they be the saviors of Japanese metal!?"
D: I wonder if they won't include something on our second single, "Friday the 13th," as well.
?: I wanna see too, Togashi!!
?: Me too!
T: Ohh, you were here too, Hasegawa?!
D: Hurry up and pinch it off, Jyouji!
D: Hasegawa had coiled shit, and Jyouji had long shits...
D: Now that our versus concert has been decided, we've got to do our best.
?: Hey, go wash your hands!
D: Yes. And at that moment, what aroused us more than anything else was...
?: It looks like Jacke Ill Dark's chosen the opponents for his World Destruction Tour.
?: You gotta wedge yourselves in.
D: We, Dezumu, exist as a band taking great influence from Jack.
D: Even garnishing flowers to that man's retirement tour would be an honor.
P: I see. I'll go and watch!!
P: But don't you think it's about time Dezumu moved to Tokyo...?
P: I think in Tokyo now, there's one very active metal band...
D: We, Dezumu, since long ago...especially since Tsuyoshi was in middle school, have always done our best here in town with our friends...
D: We created a metal movement right here in Osaka!
D: Ohhh!! Hold on a sec, pops, I think it's gonna come out now!!
D: However, one week later...
P: Pfft! After you guys leave, the saddest one is going to be this bar's toilet! (Even though you are constipated)
horizontal text at top: BIG SHOT IN THE METAL WORLD
big vertical text: Jack Ill Dark's opponent to be DMC
Jack's fixated his eyes on Detroit Metal City.
The legendary musician who has lived his life in the darkness of the metal world, Jack Ill Dark, has announced one final tour to commemorate his retirement.
This tour will feature different versus concerts against bands around the world.
(*The rest of the text is cut off)
D: WHAT THE HELL IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!
D: HE'S ALREADY DECIDED HIS OPPONENT?!
Guy: These are Jack's wishes, so...
G: There really isn't anything our office can say about the issue...
D: Do you even know what kinds of feelings and expectations our member shad about this versus concert...?
D: H-hey, Tsuyoshi, I understand your anger, but try not to get too riled up.
D: Even out of all of us, Tsuyoshi definitely has the strongest feelings toward Jack...
T: Grrr...it makes me wanna shit my pants!!
D: Wh-what? Diarrhea again?
D: We've heard of the name DMC before...
D: But I wonder what kind of band they truly are?
All three bubbles: Fuck, to the nth power
Box: It was shocking.
D: What the hell is he...
D: I can't feel a single drop of respect toward Jack...
D: coming from him!!
K: Upsa-daisy! Here we go!
C: GO TO DMC!
J: Could you please stop? I'm getting embarrased...
C: GO TO DMC!
C: DMC's dragged Jack into their People-Letters of Hell for a second time!!
C: It's their victory, hands-down!
D: Could we have done such a great performance at the time...?
D: There's no way we could have.
T: All we probably would have done was send Jack off to retirement with a hearty applause.
D: But now, tonight, they've truly displayed the passing from one generation to another...
D: It's simple. If Dezumu just continued like we always had, do you think we'd ever be able to surpass DMC?
D: At this rate, it'll become DMC's time...
N: Tomorrow I'm definitely going to tell the President I quit...
H: Hey, Togashi, can you wait to talk about this until Jyouji's back from taking a shit?
D: Man, he takes a long time.
D: I've been thinking since that day...
D: If we could somehow add something to Dezumu's destrucitve power...
D: I really can't think of anything else but THAT.
P: You're sure making a painful expression. What's wrong, constipated again?
D: No, I've just been brooding about the band lately...
P: Still troubled?
P: If you just perservere down the path you believe in, things should go well.
P: You know that half a year ago, my wife ran away from me, right...
P: That was because one night, I came home drunk and took a shit in her futon.
P: Now, I have pride in what I did.
D: That was, in other words...
D: Is shit...really something to have pride in?
P: Of course!
P: the very image of a bowel movement through constipation...
C: Little by little,
C: Woahhh, Togashi's screaming in a Munch-esque pose!
D: Little by little, I...
C: No, this is--
C: "A scream of shit"~
D: moved forward...
H: Today Togashi said he had something important to talk to us about before we started recording.
J: Ever since he went to DMC, he's been acting weird. Last night he was even knocking around some fans.
T: What the hell do you mean, scatolo-metal?! We don't have stomach problems because we want to, dumbass!!
T: Just when our second single, "Friday the 13th," was about to be finished....
T: Why did you have it changed to "Shitday the Poopteenth?!"
D: Tsuyoshi, listen to what I have to say.
D: Over the past weeks, I, who have always clung to the roots of metal, have been desperately thinking.
T: And you came up with "scatolo?!"
D: What we're doing is just generic metal!
D: Do you think we can make true metal just playing around like this?!
T: Shit like this...
T: isn't even worthy of wiping my ass with!!
D: What are you doing, bastard?!
H: Stop it, Togashi!!
D: SCATOLO-METAL IS JUST AS METAL AS DEATH METAL, ISN'T IT?!
T: THE HELL IT IS!!
D: Wait, Tsuyoshi!! Are you really going to run away?!
D: Diarrhea again, huh...
D: What are you two going to do?
H: We've always followed behind you.
J: So we'll stick with you, Togashi.
D: And so, Dezumu was reborn.
D: And thanks to our persistance, Tsuyoshi remained in the band...
D: Ah, Tsuyoshi, you're back!
T: I-I just ran out of toilet paper, that's all...
D: With that, our second single, "Shitday the Poopteenth" was released...
D: And stole the attention of many new fans.
D: And then, with our third single
Single title: "Greedily Saving up a Big One"
D: we topped 3rd on the indies charts, a feat even DMC hadn't accomplished...
D: And so, Dezumu took part in Satanic Emperor...
D: which brings us to where we are now.
D: It's about time
D: for our decisive battle against DMC.
D: Sorry for being so selfish up to now, Tsuyoshi...
D: But you should understand after tonight's battle.
D: The reason why I've done everything the way I did until now...
D: Everyone ready?
D: Let's go!
J: Hey, Negishi, hurry it up!!
N: My pants aren't dry at all!
N: Why does this always happen to me...
N: What will happen if I catch a cold from wearing these soggy pants?!
J: Dezumu is the most popular scatolo-metal band in Japan right now...
J: If we don't beat them tonight, the President will have a mouthful for us!!
N: If they hadn't been hogging the toilets, this would have never happened...
N: Why, even after being forced to come to a place I don't want to be, must I suffer even more punishment?!
N: Scatolo-metal my ass!
N: They stink of the putrid stench of total hacks!!
N: Metal isn't how you appear on the outside!! It comes from within!!
C: Woahhhh~! Dezumuuuu~!
C: Bowel movement!! Bowel movement!!
C: Bowel movement!! Bowel movement!!
D: We'll show you that there's shit incapable of being pushed around!
K: Dezumu, the place in which you live is not Hell...
K: but rather a sewer!!
[TRACK 37 - END]