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Thread: Elfi: a war time tale

  1. #1
    Registered User 初心者/ Shoshinsha / Beginner
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    Post Elfi: a war time tale


    Panel 1 Open in the village of pangate, a run down place where slaves ore the main export

    Panel 2 over head of a children running in the street

    panel 3 a boy(sage) leading a girl(Elfi) and running from a butcher
    Sage:"come on...this way"

    panel 4 boy(Sage) leading the girl(Elfi) down an ally way
    sage:"we gotta go.. this way come on"

    panel 5 boy and girl standing at a wall
    sage:"oh no... a dead end"

    Panel 6 boy and girl looking and man off panel shadowing over them
    Man:"you kids just make a huge mistake"

    panel 7 boy(sage) protecting girl(elfi) who is now crying
    Sage:"dont worry Elfi i wont let anything happen to you"

    Panel 8 sage arms stretched out as to protect Elfi
    sage:"i wont let you hurt her"

    Panel 9 letterbox of devilish smile

    panel 10 man with one hand on girl(Elfi)
    man:"well kid, hows 'bout you give my the girl and we call it even"

    Panel 11 Boy sage running at the man(off panel)
    Sage:"get your hands off her!"

    Page 2
    panel 1 boy(sage) and girl(Elfi) sitting on hill outside of village

    Panel 2 Boy(sage) badly beaten

    panel 3 Boy(sage) hanging his head down, girl(Elfi) eating a peice of bread

    Panel 4 Boy(sage) looking up with a smile

    panel 5 Boy(sage) now standing up
    Sage:"come on, we be getting home"

    panel 6 Girl(elfi) now standing beside Boy(sage)
    Elfi:"yhea i guess your right"

    panel 7 boy start to walk away girl standing stil both silhouetted

    Panel 8 girl(elfi) chasing after boy(sage)
    Elfi:" wait!"

    panel 9 girl(elfi) grabbing boy's(sage's) hand
    Elfi:"promise.. promise you wont leave..."

    panel 10 boy(sage) blushing
    Sage:"i promise

    page 3

    panel 1: boy(sage) and girl(Elfi) holding hands on hill over looking (pangate)village
    Elfi:"and promise we will stay best friends forever and ever?"
    Sage:"i promise"

    Panel 2 close up on girls(elfi's) face
    Elfi:"cross your heart and hope to die?"

    panel 3 Sages face looking mischevious

    Panel 4 girl(elfi) angry/sad face

    Panel 5 boy(sage) kissing girl(elfi) on the nose
    Sage:"of course..."

    Panel 6 boy(sage) now away from girl(Elfi's cheek)
    Sage:"forever and ever.."

    Panel 7 2 years later...Sage and Elfi are now 14, sage, is packing his things, crying and bleeding, Elfi in the background
    Elfi:"sage?, Sage are you okay? what are you doing?
    Sage:"im leaving"

    panel 8 Sage now facing Elfi blood and tears rolling down his face
    Elfi" leaving? why? and why are you bleeding?"
    Sage:"i cannot stay here any longer, they treat us like slaves and they....

    Panel 9 sage, now hanging his head down with tears in his eyes
    Sage:"i dont want to see you hurting anymore.."

    Panel 10 sage looking at Elfi in the foreground and Elfi being in the background
    sage:"come with me"

    Panel 11 close up on Elfi (now crying) face
    Elfi:"my place is here, with our people and so is yours"

    Panel 12 Sage finishing packing
    Sage:"no, im sorry but i promise to come back for you"

    page 4

    panel 1 Sage silhouetted as he leaves the room in back ground, Elfi in the forground
    Sage:"Goodbye elfi"

    Panel 2 Sage leaving village(in background)
    Sage:"cross my heart..."

    Panel 3 4 years later...Sage is now 18 and a soilder for the army standing outside his village (pangate) now in ruins
    Sage:"Elfi, im home..."

    panel 4 planes fly overhead of the village

    so this is the first instalment of my story and if you have any suggestions, corrections, ideas, or want to help in any way with the story, send me a comment.
    Last edited by Joymofo; December 30, 2012 at 09:22 PM.

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