Workshop Critique my Manga Please

[dmoura]

Hello,

I have just recently finished my 1st chapter of my first ever manga.

I am looking to get feedback about what I can do to improve the manga and also get an overall opinion on it as well.

The plot is about an orphan named Edward Teach who is an apprentice to a blacksmith who makes specialty weapons. As the story unfolds Edward is thrown into the middle of a rebellion/war, all the meanwhile Edward is learning about his owns powers and what really happened to his parents.

Email me at [email protected] or message me and I'll send you the PDF

Thanks

Dustin

 

[mackapig]

I'm gathering your looking at the fantasy genre. To me your plot seems plain (sorry if it seems harsh) maybe if you kinda add a bit of mystery towards Edward or a secondary character. Maybe have a mysterious hooded man attack the blacksmith Edwards working for which is link to Edwards parents plot. There it creates the suspicion that Edward has something that he wants and now Edward must protect himself, others and find answers during the rebellion. Becareful on the 'powers' area, you want something original to show off. I recommend a weapon forging ability that allows him to craft weapons he imagines. (how funny would it be to see him make a spoon into a greatsword). Idea seems great but you just gotta add that spark that makes the reader fall in love after the first few chapters. (Honest opinion)