Done [JP] Need help with sentences

[hakozaki]

Some info on the scene: Alessandro has just been rescued and Pietro suggests they bring him above ground to safety. Mary and Howard, however, want to continue their mission, because they think exterminating the vampires is the best way to keep Alessandro safe.

ETA: Since I don't want to spam the board with new topics every now and then, I'm putting the things I received help with under spoiler tags and post the new questions beneath.

Spoiler

I've made it a habit to write the text out in kana, because sometimes the reading can be rather archaic. Hope it's not too confusing. (If it is, how can I make it more readable?)

1.
それを現場 の判断 だけで
「それをげんばんのはんだんだけで」

勝手に 兵を退くなど
「かってにけいをひくなど」

小官 は納得 できかねます
「しょうかんはなっとくできかねます」



And later
2.
Petros: そんな屁理屈で
「そんなへりくつで」

兵を退いて弁明
「へいをひいてべんめい」

できるとお思いか!?
My best guess is: Do you think it is justifiable to argue about retreating?

いくら異端審問 局
「いくらいたんしんもんきょく」

局長といえど 厳罰 は
「きょくちょうといえどげんばつは」

免れ ませんぞ!?
「まぬがれませんぞ」
something about the Chief of the Department of Inquisition not being exempt from punishment


Any ideas?

Petros: スペンサー大佐
Captain Spencer

とりあえず聖下は 奪還できたのだ 　兵はここで退こう
We've rescued His Holiness. Let's retreat the army for now.

残る聖女は某が責任をもって捜してくるゆえ
As it is my responsibility to go search for the Lady Saint, who is still around here,

貴殿は聖下を上にを連れしてくれぬか
Would you accompany His Holiness to the surface?


Mary: ご自分が何をおっしゃっているのか
What are you saying?

わかっておいでなのですか ブラザー・ペテロ？
Do you know why we came here, Brother Petros?

聖下を保護したら吸血鬼を殲滅するというのが所期の予定でした
If you want His Holiness to be safe, we have to go ahead with our plan and exterminate the vampires.

...
I cannot accept you ordering the soldiers to retreat just based on the heat of the moment.

 

[serizawa]

Some quick and dirty suggestions:

1.
それを現場 の判断 だけで
「それをげんばのはんだんだけで」

勝手に 兵を退くなど
「かってにへいをひくなど」

小官 は納得 できかねます
「しょうかんはなっとくできかねます」

"I cannot accept (you?) ordering the soldiers to retreat just based on the heat of the moment."
(or based on what you saw at the scene etc. - change this part as you see fit for the dialogue)

2.
Petros: そんな屁理屈で
「そんなへりくつで」

兵を退いて弁明
「へいをひいてべんめい」

できるとお思いか!?
My best guess is: Do you think it is justifiable to argue about retreating?

How about something like
"Do you think that such puny arguments are enough to justify yourself for retreating the soldiers?!"

いくら異端審問 局
「いくらいたんしんもんきょく」

局長といえど 厳罰 は
「きょくちょうといえどげんばつは」

免れ ませんぞ!?
「まぬがれませんぞ」
something about the Chief of the Department of Inquisition not being exempt from punishment

Precisely. It would be something like
"Even though you are the Chief of the Department of Inquisition, you won't be exempt from a harsh punishment!"

Hope this helps...

 

[hakozaki]

Thank you so much for the fast answer. This helps a great deal!

I'm rather new at posting translation requests here. I have more problematic sentences. Do I continue to post them to this thread or do I make a new one?

 

[serizawa]

If they are from the same manga, feel free to post here. If they are from other manga, then I guess it's better to open a new thread.

 

[hakozaki]

Don't mind if I do then.

The following part is the conversation leading up to the first sentence about retreating the soldiers I had trouble with. Now it's more a "Did I get this right?" than a "Omg! I don't understand this at all!"

Petros: スペンサー大佐
Captain Spencer

とりあえず聖下は 奪還できたのだ 　兵はここで退こう
We've rescued His Holiness. Let's retreat the army for now.

残る聖女は某が責任をもって捜してくるゆえ
As it is my responsibility to go search for the Lady Saint, who is still around here,

貴殿は聖下を上にを連れしてくれぬか
Would you accompany His Holiness to the surface?


Mary: ご自分が何をおっしゃっているのか
What are you saying?

わかっておいでなのですか ブラザー・ペテロ？
Do you know why we came here, Brother Petros?

聖下を保護したら吸血鬼を殲滅するというのが所期の予定でした
If you want His Holiness to be safe, we have to go ahead with our plan and exterminate the vampires.

...
I cannot accept you ordering the soldiers to retreat just based on the heat of the moment.

 

[serizawa]

残る聖女は某が責任をもって捜してくるゆえ
As it is my responsibility to go search for the Lady Saint, who is still around here,

This seems fine to me.

Mary: ご自分が何をおっしゃっているのか
What are you saying?

わかっておいでなのですか ブラザー・ペテロ？
Do you know why we came here, Brother Petros?

I guess it's the same sentence. Therefore, it would be something like "Do you really know what you are saying, Brother Petros?"

Hope this helps...