In these kinds of "ideology games", it all depends on which definition is used anyway.
It would make much more sense to concretely outline your vision for a system and then giving it a name than to just fight people over definitions.
Obviously, people calling themselves socialists in the US (usually) are fighting for a nordic model much rather than the UDSSR. The same really goes for Europe.
I have a personal definition of socialism and capitalism that i find very, very good (if i say so myself), even tho it is vague enough to have nothing to do with the actual definitions.
Capitalism: You want as little regulations as possible because you think that strong men should be able to accomplish everything within their limits, because that drives society forward.
Socialism: You reject the distinction between little and big men and instead push for a system that at least works towards fulfilling everybody's basic needs, which you outline very generously (not just food, also social needs, creative needs, so on).
In my experience, when talking to people, it makes much more sense to find out where they end up between those poles than fighting about definitions. Elseways you are in these "CHECK MATE, SOCIALIST! NORWAY HAS A FREE MARKET" kinds of discussions.