[Casaubon] attempts Cleaning Challenge #003

[Casaubon]

Okay I think I did pretty good on most of this except the cieling, which I don't even know wtf I did. Can anyone even tell me what your supposed to do on the cieling. My hand was hurting quite a bit by the time I got there so I guess I'll use that as an excuse!

also I know I cut off kain's ear

 

[vlado]

cealing is good and yeah the ear thing , but you are really good at this...do you like one piece???if you do you should join us at rush...pm shinwei silveril and or fnuck

 

[silveril]

err
the ceiling, the sky and the floor.. and the girl's skin; the pattern you use is way to dark ^.^" (if you have kept the psd, you can just replace the gray...quite easy in fact ^^)
as for the floor, you should make it fade (see how the gray fades away in the original raw?) to do so..:
• after doing the the gray layer, create a new layer over it.. put some white (with the brush) at where it should be white (duh) thus at the end.. then lower the opacity of that layer. then take the smudge tool, and smudge the white toward the gray part (always on the white layer of course).. to make it uniforme, smudge the white that's in the gray part from right to left with lower strength (like 20% or so)

for the ceiling; you should only use one type of pattern (like on the raw.. always check the raw to check which pattern u need to use ^^).. and same as for the floor, you should make it fade a bit (check the raw to see how it's suppose to be)

 

[Casaubon]

Okay I made the clouds and the girl lighter, but I think I might have made them too light. It was only one pattern down (using the dots and screens 2 pack thing) so I dunno. For the cieling If I made it any lighter it looked dumb, and Shinwei said in some other thread there was 2 patterns in the cieling, so I was just going by that. Mostly I just wanted to see if I did the fade good, I'm still not quite sure I get how to fade well.

 

[shinwei]

Hey, sorry my laptop's LCD cracked so I can't see anything very well. >< ><
I'm on a computer at work right now so I can't comment.

Hopefully someone can help you out soon. Fnuckale is back tomorrow morning, btw.

 

[Fnuckale]

Alright so now the patterns you made lighter are TOO light. The patterns you used in the first place were pretty good in fact, perhaps make them just a tad bit lighter. At any rate thats the least of your problems right now.
We'll go a frame by frame:
2nd frame: The greys next to the dude's hair weren't redone. His ear partly disappeared xD (thanks Ivo for pointing that one out).
3rd frame: The greys in the sky should fade around those clouds. Silveril's method is a good one, but don't decrease the opacity of the layer and it might work better for you.
4th frame: Cieling shouldn't be completely grey but have a grey pattern at the beginning that will fade out (Silveril already suggested how you do that). The greys on the columns should be redone. The dude's cape and those soldiers clothing shouldn't be COMPLETELY grey (fix that by erasing the parts you shouldn't have made grey with the eraser tool). I would suggest using the same pattern you used for the girl's clothing on the 5th frame for her clothing on this frame. The greys on the floor should fade out.
6th frame: The pattern for the girl's shoulder should be the same as the pattern for her face. Right next to the girl's chick you have a part you forgot greying. Greys in the girl's eye should be redone.
Two problems that appear for evrey frame are the bluury lineart (due to the page rotating) and the bad reframing (kinda thick and not straight).
The two big mistakes that make the page look bad are the lineart and the greys that are supposed to fade.

I'm sorry if all this seems a bit hursh, I just hope you can learn from your mistakes and get better overall good job and with such effort you SHOULD be able to produce HQ pages easily in the future

 

[Casaubon]

I'm sorry if all this seems a bit hursh, I just hope you can learn from your mistakes and get better overall good job and with such effort you SHOULD be able to produce HQ pages easily in the future

Haha, its okay. This was basically my first clean ever, so I'm open to all criticism. Thanks for the reply, since you basically found every thing wrong with it

 

[nytrogyn]

looks nice imo, just keep practicing, learn how to blend those clouds.