Help Request a Full Translation Check

[Epsilonium]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

Thanks a lot, I'll get to wrok on this chapter if this is all the mistakes the translator made, though it seems he didn't make too many mistakes and so I guess I can rely on him in the future.

On another note


ささやかな出会いが多重奏を作り出す… 吹奏楽グラフィティ、開幕!
Small meetings overlap to create an ensemble… Brass music graffity, Begin!

Does it really say Brass Music Graffiti, because that just sounds kind of strange?

The translator did not make too many mistakes on getting the meaning right. However, there are still some phrases awkwardly put or directly translated...I will be leaving it up to editors, because it will be just the matter of fluency then.

As for "graffity"...I am not sure what it is supposed to mean. It is directly translated, and it does sound like "graffity" in Jpn as well. Since it means so strange using the word "graffiti," perhaps you can just call it a concert.

 

[alessandriana]

Re: [shonen] Ushio to Tora Ch 1 by alessandriana

...someone? anyone?

;_;

 

[njt]

Re: [shonen] Ushio to Tora Ch 1 by alessandriana

A~~~nd finished.

You did a great job! (this really your first time??)
With that said, here are some suggestions and corrections . Let me know if you want to know why i used something and such^^

Shigure: 現にうちの寺にまつられとる槍なんぞは、妖怪退治の名人のありがたーい槍なんだからな！
It's because the spear our temple is dedicated to is actually the famous youkai exterminator's cursed* spear.

I'd use blessed here :3

Ushio:
あのな。。。オヤジ今年いくつになる？
Hey dad... how old are you going to turn this year?

Hear me out... How old are you turning this year?

Ushio:
そうか。。。　
４７の分別ざかりでその上
寺の住職という社会的地位もある。。。そんなオトナが。。。
You've got 47 years of experience... and furthermore you're the head priest of a temple... and yet that kind of adult is...

Right...
So you've got 47 years of experience, not to mention you're the head priest of a temple... An adult like that...

Ushio:
＃毎日毎朝ムスコにオバケの説教たれんじゃねーっ！！
preaching to his son every day and every morning about monsters!

should NOT be preaching to his son day and night about monsters!!

Ushio:
ありがたあい「槍」があるっつーがな！
Does this cursed "spear" really even exist?

You say this blessed "Spear" exists and all but!

Ushio:
みせたことねーだろがよ一回も！
I've never even seen it once!

You've yet to show it to me!

Shigure:
＃う。。。うむ
Y...yes

Ri...right...

Ushio:
このボケハゲ。ホラふくんじゃねー。
You senile old baldie. Don't brag.

Stop with the wise tales!!

Shigure:
だれがハゲだって？このちび！！
Who's bald!? You stupid chibi!

Who you calling baldy?! You shrimp!

Ushio:
ムスコを足げにするとはてめー！！
Kicking your son like that, you bastard!

Who'd of known you'd kick your own flesh and blood, bastard!

Random old couple:
はじまりましたな今日も
They've started again today

They're at it again

Shigure:
てめーとはなんだ！気にしてるコトを。
Who're you calling a bastard! Take care.

Look who's talking! Hitting me where it hurts with that hair comment of yours!

Shigure:
ちーび　ちーび！！
Chibi! Chibi!

Shrimp! Shrimp!!

Shigure:
ちゃんとやっとけよ、潮！
Shigure: Do it right, Ushio!

And don't do a half-ass job, Ushio!

Ushio:
うちの寺はけっこう古くて五００年くらいの歴史があるらしい。
Our temple is pretty old-- it's been around for about 500 years.

-- Apparently ~~

Ushio:
オヤジのホラの原因になるわけだ。
That's the reason Dad's always bragging.

That's the reason for dad's bogus stories.

Ushio:
こんなのしらんぞ。なんか入っとるのか。。。なっと。。。
I didn't know about this. Let's see if it opens... okay...

I didn't know about this. Let's see if there's something... inside...

Ushio:
なにかいる！？
Is there something here?

Something's there!!?

Tora:
やれやれ。。。五００年ぶりの人間はずいぶんやかましいな。
Geez... what a noisy human after 500 years.

Geez... A human after 500 years, and I get a loud mouth.

Tora:
五００年の間！わしはこのいまいましい槍でここにはりつけられてきた。
I've been stuck here for 500 years by this annoying spear!

500 years!! This wretched spear has held me to this very spot!

Tora:
しらんのか？人の魂を食いながら邪を裂き鬼を突くこのクソったれな槍を。。。
Didn't you know? This damn spear that runs on human souls and tears apart evil...
Never heard? This spear feeds of the human's soul, slashing evil and stabbing demons.
And this effing thing was stabbed...

Tora:
ま、いいから早くこれをぬけ。
Well, anyways, hurry up and take out the spear.

Well, enough about that, just take it out already!

いて、じゃねーかよー
That hurts you punk! (You realize that hurts, don't you!?)

Tora:
あ〜なんだ！わしもちょっといいすぎたよなんせ五００年ぶりの好機だったんでね。。。
Ah~ what! I also said a little too much, since this is my first good chance in 500 years...

Ah~ come on! I got a little out oh hand there too, after all I've waited 500 years for a chance like this...

Tora:
おっ、おいっ、イノチってなんだよ！動けるってコトだろ？
Hey, hey, what's this "life"? Does it mean that you can move?

Hey, hey! What's this "liphes" talk? You're talking about the ability to move, right? (Point here is, he says it in katakana which means he doesn't know what it means, and as such to show it in english change the spelling around a bit to something that is wrong , helps get the meaning across )

Tora:
おまえは動けるように食わないって！ほかの人間はオマエにカンケーないだろうっ！！
In order to keep you moving, I won't eat you! Just other people who don't have anything to do with you!

I won't eat you, so you can continue moving! Other people are none of your concern though!

Page 13:
オヤジーっ。槍はあったけどバケモンつきじゃねーかよ！
Dad--. The spear was there but the monster was there too!

Dad--. I found the spear BUT SINCE WHEN DID IT COME WITH A MONSTER?!

Letter:
潮へ
ちょっと日本海の方をプラプラしてくるから一週間ほどまたテキトーにやっとくれ

To Ushio
I've gone to the ocean to relax, see you in about a week, do it properly(?) (take care of yourself?)

To Ushio
I've gone to the ocean to relax, do what you want again for another week.

Asako:
はやく帰らなきゃ。。。まったく！
If we don't get home soon... geez!

We better hurry home...geez!

Mayuko:
なーんていって日曜日にも蒼月クンとあえるなんていーねぇ麻子！
What're you saying, don't you think it's nice to see Aotsuki-kun on a Sunday, Asako?

Sure, you say it like that, but aren't you lucky to see Aotsuki-kun on Sunday too, Asako!

Asako:
ちょ、ちょっとまってよ、誰が誰にあってうれしいだって？真由子。
W-wait a minute, who'd be happy to see who? Mayuko.

Huh? What's that? Who's happy to see who? Mayuko.

Mayuko:
あら、うれしくないの？
Oh, then you aren't happy?

Wait, so you're not?

Asako:
あったりまえよだーれが！
Obviously, who would be!

As if! Who would?!

Mayuko:
あたしはうれしいな。じゃ、もらってもいいの。
Mayuko: I'm happy. So then, is it okay if I take him?

I am, so it's ok if I go after him?

Mayuko:
ムシでもいるの？
Is it a bug?

See a bug or something?

Asako:
なにをトチ狂っておるバカモン！！
What are you going (touch??) crazy for, idiot!

Stop messing around, moron!! トチ狂= ばかみたいにふさける

*part you missed*
いいのに
I don't mind

Ushio:
そうそう、はやくノートとってこい。
That's right, hurry up and get my notes!

Good good, hurry up and bring us our notes!

Ushio:
オイ、バケモンてめーオレの目になんかしたろっ！！
Oi, bastard, what'd you do to my eyes!

I'd say use monster/beast for this

Tora:
この地下には五００年間とじこめられていたわしの妖気やうっぷんがたまってた。。。
In the 500 years I've been imprisoned here, my youki and my resentment have accumulated here...

Take out one of the "here"s

Tora:
みてろよ。やつらは実体化して人を襲うぞ！
You'll see. As soon as they become substantial, they will attack people!

Look for yourself. They'll become solid and attack people!

Tora:
ムダだね。おまえにゃたすけられん　魚妖どもは、やっかいだからな。
It's useless. There's no way you can save them.

It's useless. There's no way you can save them. Those fish spirits are quite a handful

Tora:
わかってるな。
You seem to understand.

So you get it.

Tora:
わしならできるんだぜ！
But I could do it!

I'm the one that can save them!

Page 21:

Tora:
へへ。。。そのためにゃこの槍がジャマだがなあ。。。
Hehe... though to do that, this spear would get in the way...

Hehe... I'd do that too, if it weren't for this spear in the way...

Tora:
フン。わかったみてえじゃねえか。
Heh. Looks like you do understand...

Heh. Now we're talking!

Ushio:
。。。やっつけてくれよ。。。
You'll get rid of them...

...Get them for me...

Tora:
まさまーッ！
No way... (???)

(it says きさま )
Why you--!!!

Tora:
ということは。。。
That is to say...

Which means...

Tora:
あの時と。。。同じだ。。。
It's the same... as that time...

History... repeats itself...

Tora:
同じだああ。。。！
It's the same!

Not again...!!!

Tora:
うわ！やってくれるぜ。魚妖どもがあつまってどんどんでかくなっていきやがる。
Uwa! They're really coming. Those damn fish youkai are quickly coming out and merging together...

Man! They really ARE a pain. Those fish youkai have kept merging together to form that huge thing!

Ushio:
槍が。。。教えてくれた。。。
The spear... it's talking to me...

The spear... it told me everything...

Ushio:
それもおまえの責任だ！
That's also your responsibility!

Then you're in charge of getting rid of them too!

Tora;
きったねーっ。いたたたたたた。。。
Cheater. Owowowowow....

That's low... owowowowow

Ushio:
なにいってんだだましたクセに。
Look who's talking, liar...

Oh, and trying to trick me wasn't?

Page 33:

Tora:
人間め！こうなったらとりついてやる。スキをみて絶対に食ってやるぞ！
Stupid human! In that case I'm going to haunt you. And as soon as I get a chance, I'm definitely going to eat you!

Stupid human! For that I'm going to haunt you, and the moment you leave yourself open, you're lunch!

Ushio:
こんなヤツを世に放つわけにゃいかねーもんな。いつかゼッタイこの槍でホロボしてやるぞ。
There's no way I can let him go free. I'm definitely going to kill him with this spear someday.

Kill is a bit too harsh, perhaps trash, pound... not kill though .

Ushio:
なんだバカ妖怪！
What, idiot youkai!

For the youkai/monsters thing. Make sure to pick one and stick with it (or maybe it's just me changing >.> but yeah )

Tora:
さっきいってた「イノチ」ってコトバの意味がわからん。。。
Tora: I still don't understand that "life" word you said earlier...

I still don't understand the word "liphes" you were talking about...

Ushio:
おまえにゃ一生わかんねーよ！それよりも名前ねえと不便だな。。。
Like hell you don't understand it! And more importantly, it's irritating not having a name to call you...

You'll probably never understand it! Besides that, do you realize it's annoying not having a name to call you?

Ushio:
うるせえ！じゃこの態度はなんだ！？
Shut up! And what's with that attitude!? (is he talking about how Tora is now invisible and weightless and sitting on his shoulder?)

Shut up! And what are you doing?!(Yeah, more about what he's doing.)

Tora:
いーだろ、どうせほかの人間にゃみえねえから。それよりわしはそんな名はいやだぞ。
It's fine, other humans can't see me. And more importantly, I don't like that name.

Deal with it, it's not like other humans can see me anyway. I still don't like that name by the way.

 

[njt]

Re: Black Lagoon Vol. 3 Chapter 15 by Akas

Akas I'll try and get yours tomorrow :3 sorry for the delay m(￣ー￣)m ゴメン

 

[Digitalr]

Re: Black Lagoon Vol. 3 Chapter 15 by Akas

chapter 15 raw since the other link is not working..

 

[Crayola]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

overall, the "mobile number" is in fact "(mobile) mail address."

Um, I might be confused, but isn't the phone number the mailing address for phones? Or is it different in Japan? Because when I text to someone, I text to their phone number

 

[njt]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

overall, the "mobile number" is in fact "(mobile) mail address."

Um, I might be confused, but isn't the phone number the mailing address for phones? Or is it different in Japan? Because when I text to someone, I text to their phone number

Japan phones have both SMS and mail. Jp people don't use sms though, they use mail. So they typically have a @docomo.ne.jp or other provider email address for the phone~
Any net email can email them too~ unlike sms where it's limited to either phones or skype like things .

 

[Crayola]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

Cool thanks, I'm done with the Edited Manga, just awaiting clarification for the line from the translator

なななななな
nanananana

 

[Epsilonium]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

Cool thanks, I'm done with the Edited Manga, just awaiting clarification for the line from the translator

なななななな
nanananana

[/url][/QUOTE]

oh...yeah, that was a weird one to take its original sound...
"nananananana" is original sound in Jpn.
and most likely, "なんだって" or "何（なに）", both meaning "what!?", is going to follow.
so I guess ...maybe "whawhawhawhat!?" will do.
the speaker is far too surprised that he/she is repeating the first syllable:p

 

[alessandriana]

Re: [shonen] Ushio to Tora Ch 1 by alessandriana

You did a great job! (this really your first time??)
With that said, here are some suggestions and corrections . Let me know if you want to know why i used something and such^^

Thank you soooo much, I really appreciate the help. *g*

Well, it's my first time trying to translate manga. I took 4 yrs of Japanese in college, and translated a Murakami story for my senior thesis, but I had a lot of help with that. And it's been a year or so since I've used any Japanese at all, so I figure translating manga should help me keep my hand in~

Shigure: 現にうちの寺にまつられとる槍なんぞは、妖怪退治の名人のありがたーい槍なんだからな！
It's because the spear our temple is dedicated to is actually the famous youkai exterminator's cursed* spear.

I'd use blessed here :3

So arigatai is blessed? Huh. I couldn't find any meaning for it besides thankful in any of my dictionaries (and calling it the thankful spear somehow just didn't sound right... ;p).

Ushio:
このボケハゲ。ホラふくんじゃねー。
You senile old baldie. Don't brag.

Stop with the wise tales!!

Why wise tales?

Dad--. I found the spear BUT SINCE WHEN DID IT COME WITH A MONSTER?!

Hee. I kind of love this.

(it says きさま )
Why you--!!!

*headdesk* THAT MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE. *is blind*

For the youkai/monsters thing. Make sure to pick one and stick with it (or maybe it's just me changing >.> but yeah )

Yeah, I need to go back and do that. The thing is, the original keeps switching between using bakemono and youkai, and I didn't want to say youkai when they said bakemono, but... guess perhaps I should.

Again, thank you~

 

[njt]

Re: [shonen] Ushio to Tora Ch 1 by alessandriana

Thank you soooo much, I really appreciate the help. *g*

Sure no prob sorry it took so long

Well, it's my first time trying to translate manga. I took 4 yrs of Japanese in college, and translated a Murakami story for my senior thesis, but I had a lot of help with that. And it's been a year or so since I've used any Japanese at all, so I figure translating manga should help me keep my hand in~

Ah~ well that makes more sense. But yeah, it does show that you're not a noob at japanese

So arigatai is blessed? Huh. I couldn't find any meaning for it besides thankful in any of my dictionaries (and calling it the thankful spear somehow just didn't sound right... ;p).

er well it's not actually "blessed", see the reason I got that is, the spear is the cause for gratitude and so it was a blessing? unto them type thing. If you can find another way to say that then be my guest

Why wise tales?

http://dic.yahoo.co.jp/dsearch?enc=...name=0ss&stype=1&pagenum=1&index=118187800010 Entry #2 大げさ= over exaggerated type thing + uso wo iu

Hee. I kind of love this.

Haha glad you liked it took a bit to come up with (tried to capture the mood )

*headdesk* THAT MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE. *is blind*

Yeah, I need to go back and do that. The thing is, the original keeps switching between using bakemono and youkai, and I didn't want to say youkai when they said bakemono, but... guess perhaps I should.

Well we have diff words for that too. Demon, monster, creature, etc etc

Again, thank you~

Anytime

 

[Yami no ame]

Re: Houkago Wind Orchestra by Yami no Ame

Thanks for the help Epsilonium

I'm not used to translating yet
Any tips as to which bits to leave in japanese and which bits to translate would be a great help...

 

[tora-chan]

Re: [Shonen] Naruto Chapter 397 by KNH

Hiya!

もう一人の〝写輪眼を持つ男〟が語るイタチの真実———そして、その目的とは！？
The other person who carries a sharingan speaks of the Itachi's truth----And, what is his objective?!

You forgot a "the" before "Itachi's"


ここまでの手を打っておくとはな…
Madara: I've taken measures for this up until now, though

Here he was talking about Itachi 手を打つ means "to make one's move", so he's saying "I didn't expect he'd make such a move..." I used "I didn't think he'd pull such a trick on me" to make it sound more fluent, but anyway, any variant is fine, as long as he speaks about Itachi making a move against him


いや　お前からオレを遠ざけるためとでもいおうか…
Madara: Or should I say it was for me to keep my distance from you.

Not bad, but maybe you should use "to keep me away from you", since it sounds better ^^


イタチの最後っ屁ってやつだな…
オレには通用しなかったが…
Madara: Itachi is really someone who doesn't give up... It had no effect on me but...

I'll paste my explanation of the pun:
(note: he's actually using a pun here.. XD He literally says "a skunk's last fart": it's a saying originating from the fact that skunks, when cornered, emit particularly smelly gas. It's used when referring to a person's last struggle [before dying or being captured or whatever]. The name "itachi" means "weasel", but it may commonly refer to any member of the weasel family, skunks included XD ; ndt)

So basically he was saying that trick was Itachi's last effort to fight him before dying While your line is not really wrong, maybe you should put it like "It was Itachi's last effort" or something


どうやら　一筋縄ではいかなそうだな
Madara: It doesn't seem any ordinary method will work

This is correct He's meaning that Sasuke apparently won't be convinced by simple words.


ま　無理もない…
怪しげな奴にこんなことを急に言われてもな
Madara: Well, I don't blame you...even if a questionable person like myself were to suddenly say this...

This structure is a bit tricky. It literally means: "I don't blame you - since a suspicious guy suddenly says this thing to you". It's like saying, "Well, after all a suspicious man popped out of nowhere and suddenly told you all these things... It's logical that you can't believe it."


忍の世の為　木ノ葉の為　そして何より弟のお前の為に　全てを懸けた———
Madara: For the sake of the shinobi world, for the sake of Konoha, and most importantly for your sake as his little brother, everything was risked.

Here he's talking about what Itachi did. It's -> "He (Itachi) risked everything for the sake of blabla". And it connects to the following line:

兄　うちはイタチの生き様を！！
Madara:Your brother, Uchiha Itachi, lived!!!

生き様 means "the way one person lived/what he did in his life".
The whole sentence, patched up in the right order, would be: 忍の世の為　木ノ葉の為　そして何より弟のお前の為に　全てを懸けた　兄　うちはイタチの生き様を　お前は聞かなくてはならない！
That is -> "You HAVE to listen to - how your brother, Uchiha Itachi [who risked everything for the sake of blabla] lived."
Japanese can be quite.. errr... twisted sometimes XD You must always be careful and try to understand when lines begin and end, and if two sentences are connected or not


NO.397／おわり
次号は、作者取材のため休憩させていただきます。
Number 397 Next time, Author Research
It will not be published
[I wasn't sure if I should have included the second part. Is it to indicate there will be no Naruto next week?]

Yes, this is the "usual" line Shounen Jump uses when a manga skips a week XD You can translate it as you like, just make sure it's understandable that "there will be no Naruto next week", because readers are interested in this piece of info

 

[tora-chan]

Re: [Seinen] Black Lagoon Vol. 3 Chapter 15 by Akas

I checked your translation and sent you a PM with the details~

 

[LoktarOgar]

[Seinen] Cyber Blue v01 c01a

Before we start, there's something I gotta say. First of all, this is only the first part of the first chapter. In total it's 73 pages but I figured just posting this first will be best if things turn out for the worse. Secondly, this is the product of 8 months of studying. I'm pretty sure that it's not good enough to be used as translation for my own group (which it's supposed to be, it's our policy to do series we want and this is one of them) even wíth your aid, but I want to see how far I can get and what ye olde experienced people think of it. There will be lots of (!!!)s and I wouldn't be surprised or offended if, at the sight of all of them, you'd just say I'd need more knowledge before attempting a translation. I might even be relieved. Well, whatever. Let'sa go already!


Link to raw for reference: http://delinquent-manga.nyaatorrents.org/Cyber%20Blue/Cyber%20Blue%20v01.zip

p004
新人　類創造！！　の　巻。。。５
A newly created kind of man! ...5 (/A new kind of man!)
死ぬ　の　は　きさまだ！！　の　巻。。。７３
You're gonna die bastard! ...73
その　弾丸　に　怒り　を　の　巻。。。９５
(Filling?) That bullet with hatred ...95
最後　の　警官　の　巻。。。１１５
The last policeman ...115
故郷　で　の　再会　の　巻。。。１３５
Reunion at birthplace ...135
忘れえぬ　場所　の　巻。。。１５９
Unforgettable place ...159
死　の　笑み　お　与える！！　の　巻。。。１８１
Giving the smile of death! ...181

p005
地球　から　最も　遠い　植民惑星　テイノス　（the "I" is small but I have no idea what "Tinosu" could mean)
The farthest planet in colonized space, "Tinosu".

地球　の　半分程　の　空気　と　寒冷　な　気候　そして　砂漠　の　大地
The atmosphere is only half that of Earth, the climate cold and the surface desert-like.

新人　類創造！！　の　巻
A newly created kind of man!

風　に　巻きあげられた　砂塵　は　いつも　そら　を　あかくそめ
Clouds of dust blown up by the wind make for a constantly crimson colored sky.

その　苛酷　な　環境　の　もと　で　は　人類　は　つねに　生命維持装置　を　身に　まとい。　その　装置　と　共生　せねば　生きて　いけなかった
The harsh circumstances have forced people to live on life-support systems. Having these devices installed is necessary in order to survive.

この　星　に　最初　の　開拓者　が　降り立って　３００　有余　年　開拓者たち　の　夢　は　すべて　に　朽ち果て　富める 者たち に とって　この　星　は　もはや　故郷　で　は　なかった
It's been over 300 years since the first settlers arrived on this planet. In time, their dreams have withered away. The rich do not consider this planet their home and have started to long for Earth.

p006/007
この　星　を　故郷　と　する　人　び　と　は　棄てるられた民
Those who do consider this planet their home have been abandoned.

かれら　を　救う者　は　まだ　生まれていない。　この　星　の　ため　の　新しいき　人類　は
Their savior has not yet been born.

新人　類創造！！　の　巻
A newly created kind of man!

p008
2305
２３０５年
ージャンクシテイー
2305
Junk City

さあさあ！　こいつ　は　出物だよ！
Look at this! This's second hand!

PG301V型　生命維持　コンピューターだ！
A type PG301V life-support system computer!

超小型　と　は　いかないが　これだけ　の　代物　が　たったの　１８００　バックス　だ！
If you got this super small model you don't need anything else! Get it for just 1800 bucks!

た。。。たしかに　安いな
Tha-... that's pretty cheap.

でも　おっさん　こいつ　は　本当　に　使えるのかい？
But mister, does it really work?

p009
ん！？　どうしたんだ？
Huh?! What's up with you?

ゼエ
Zee...

ハー　ゼエ。。。
Haa...zee...

なんだ　おまえ　せいめいいじそうち　お　つけてねえのか！？
What the hell? You're not using a life-support system?!

ここへ　来る　とちょう　かっぱわれたんだ。。。
On the way here it was stolen from me...

ほお～
Ho~

そいつ　は　らっきー　だな！
That guy's pretty lucky huh!

この　オンピューター　を　試すこと　が　できるんだ　ホラ
Here, try this computer on for size!

あ。。。ああ
A... alright.

p010
す～
Su~

は～　効くな　こいつは
Ha~ It's working.

あたりまえだ　この　星　じゃ酸素供給　システム　を　もたなきゃ　いきていけねえ
Of course! If you're ain't got an oxigen supply system there's no way you could survive on this planet.

もう　買うしかねえだろ！
You gotta buy it!

1800 バックス　だ！
It's 1800 bucks!

ああ
Yeah.

買うよ
I'll buy it.

毎度あり
Nice doing business with you.

ふ～
Ugh~

さあさあ　こいつ　は　出物だよ　イオン　化酸素透過　システム　つきだよ～！
Ladies and gentlemen! Come have a look at this second hand oxygen [... ] system!

え。。。！？
Huh...?!

p011
お。。。おい
He-...hey!

さあさあ　いらっしゃい
Step right up people!

ち。。。ちょっと　まてよ　おっさん！
Wa-...wait a second mister!

今　金　を　はらっただろ　品物　を　渡せよ！
I just gave you the money, that thing is mine now!

ん～！？
Huh?!

１８００　バックス　は　酸素　一回分だよ！
1800 bucks will get you a single dose!

ボウヤ！
Brat!

く。。。くそ　汚ねえぞ　おやじ～　金　かえせ！
Shi-...shit! That's dirty you old bastard, gimme back my money!

あっちへ行かんか！
Get lost!

かえせーっ
Give it back!

あっちへ行けといっとるのが～
Didn't I tell you to get lost?!

わからんかーっ！
What don't you get about that?!

p012
ぐくっ
Gukuh

おい　ハエ　を　はらえ
!!! (Hey, make him pay up?)

へい！
Aight!

オラア　ガキ　は　お家　へ　帰んな
Hey brat, how 'bout you go home!

いやなら　殺して　やっても　いいぜ～
If you don't wanna we'll just kill you right here.

p013
うく。。。
Ugh...

おら～
Hey~

なら　撃てよ
Then shoot me.

ふっ。。。
Huh...

いいか　この　国　じゃ　ガキ　ひとり　ぐらい　しんだって　だれも　見むきもしねえんだぜ
You sure? No one'll notice when a brat like you's died in this country.

いいから　撃てよ！
Cut the crap already and shoot!

バカめ　死んねや！
Retard, just die!

p014
no text

p015
ゲヒッ
Argh!

う！
Urk!

ガキめ
You brat!

うっ
Ugh!

わ。。。
I...

わ。。。わかった　も。。。　もっていけ
I... I got it. Ju-... just take it.

くそ！
Fuck!

p016
ふ～
Phew~

ん！？
Huh?!

な。。。なんだ　この　ホース　は！？
Wha-...what's this hose?

ビ。。。ビ。。。
beep...beep...

う？
Uh?

ファーック！
Fu~uck!

乱暴　に　するなよ　新しい　ご主人様よ！
Don't be so rude, new master!

p017
う。。。う。。。
Uh... uh...

大型　で　旧式　の　ポンコツ　を　つかまされたのか　ちくしょ～
I... I got this huge old piece of junk?! Son of a bitch!

ボーイ　外見　で　はんだん　するんじゃねえ
Hey kid, don't judge by appearances!

ボーイ　
Kid!

おまえ　いくつだ！？
How old are you?!

１７だ
I'm 17.

そいつ　は　いいや！
Isn't that nice!

まだ　青い　ケツ　に　くそ　を　つけてる　ガキじゃねえか　でかい　口　たたくな！
Even though you're still wet behind the ears, you're already talking smack?!

な。。。なに　じゃあ　おまえ　は　いくつなんだ
Wha-...what? Then how old are you?

３００だ！
I'm 300!

さ。。。３００～！
Thr-...300!

か～　それ　は　旧式　なんて　もんじゃない　ほとんど　化石　じゃないか！？
Ah, is that an old model I see there? Looks like it's from the stone age!

おい　大丈夫か？
Hey, are you alright?

む？
Huh?

きみ　の　ガン　さばき　見せて　もらったよ
You showed me your judgment-by-gun. (err...)

なんだ　あんた！？
Who're you?!

p018
わたし　は　SPC の　ワイザー　(no idea) だ！
SPC = Security Police Company
I'm [Waizaa] from the S.P.C.!

保安官！？
The sheriff?!

今　の　連中　は　わたし　の　部下　が　逮捕　に　行った　金　は　とり　戻してやるよ！
Those guys were my subordinates, but after they've been arrested I'll give you back your money!

そ。。。そうですか
Re-... really?

それよりも　今　の　きみ　の　腕　を　みて　ひとつ　話　が　あるんだが
More importantly, there's something I want to ask about what you did just now.

えっ？
Huh?

これが　何だか　わかるかね
You know what this is, right?

p019
あっ　そ。。。それは
Ah, tha-... that's...

地球　行き　の　チケット！
A ticked into space!

そうだ　だれも　が　ほし　が　ある　スペース　シップ　の　チケットだ！
That's right. It's a ticket for anyone that wants to go on a space ship!

だが　現状　で　は　この　チケット　を　て　に　いれる　こと　が　てきる　の　は　ごく　一部　の　エリート　かかなり　の　金　持ちだけだ
But currently, the only ones with enough money to get their hands on a ticket like this are the elite.

そのために　この　街　は　チケット　を　めぐって　恐るべき　数　の　人間　数　殺されている
(!!!) For it to be like that, a terribly large numbers of people are being killed.

だが　あいにく　優秀　な　人材　に　とぼしくてね　我われ も その　犯罪　防止　に　手　を　焼いている
Unfortunately however, these elites aren't very capable. Even we are having a hard time fighting crime.

どうだ　わたし　の　仕事　を　手伝って　は　くれんか
What do you say? Will you accept this job offering and help us out?

え。。。　仕事　を
Uh... A job...

文無しで　仕事　も　ないのだろう
You're broke and unemployed, aren't you?

ボーナス　は　はずむよ
You'll receive bonuses.

あ。。。　は。。。　はい！
Ah... a-... alright!

やってくれるか　よし　きみ　を　保安官助手　に　任命しよう
You made the right decision. Now, let me appoint you deputy sheriff.

きみ　の　名は？
What's your name?

はい！　ブ。。。ブルーです！
Right! It... it's Blue!

p020
ブルーか　いい　名　だ
Blue huh? That's a nice name!

それでは　ブルー　早速仕事だ
Now then, Blue, time to get started on the job.

今夜　ここに　強盗　が　はいると　の　情報　が　はいったのだ　警備　に　いってくれ
We have information that a burglary will take place here tonight, please defend the place.

は。。。はい！
Al... alright!

素直　な　いい　返事だ
That's what I wanted to hear!

わたし　は　優秀　な　若者　が　好きだよ
If only all young men were good guys like you.

ラッキーだぜ　仕事　に　ありつけた
Awesome, I got job!

よし　さっそく　いくぞ　おめおも。。。
Alright, let's get going. You too...

フ。。。フ。。。ピ。。。
Fu-... fu-... beep...

ファ。。。ク
Fu-... ck.

どうした！？
What's wrong?!

エ。。。エネルギーが　切れた
I... I've run out of energy.

お。。。おまえ　金　もってねえか
You... you got any money?

ないよ！
I don't!

う。。。目　が　まわる　ピ。。。が。。。まわる
Ugh... Eyes... closing... Shutting... down...

p021
う。。。うわ。。。　ダ。。。ダメダ　死ぬ
Uh... huh... it... it's no good, it's dead.

しょう　が　ねえな
I guess there's no other way.

これだけ　は　使いたくなかったんだが
This was the one thing I didn't wanna use.

ラ。。。ラッキー！
Lu-... lucky~!

ぷはー　生き返るぜ！
Phew~ I'm alive again!

サンキュー　相棒　仲よく　たろうぜ
Thanks pal, I got a feeling you and I'll be getting real close.

フ。。。おまえ　の　おかげで　一文なしだよ
Heh... thanks to you, I became someone important.

ボーイ　おまえなんか　懐かしい　におい　が　するぜ
Kid, you smell kinda nostalgic.

なんだ　そりゃー
What the hell?!

３００年前　に　は　おまえみたいな　お人好し　が　いっぱい　いたんだよ
300 years ago there were lots of charming guys like you.

ちぇっ　いってろ！
!!! (Get lost!)?

p022
ここか？
Here?

中で　待機だ
My orders are inside.

オーケー　赤ちゃん！
OK baby!

敵　が　あらわれたああ　教えてくれよ
What's up with the hostility?

ファーック
Fu~uck!

ベビーベッド　でも　さがし　な　
!!!! ('Cause you're looking for a crib.) ?

３００年　も　生きてると　口　が　汚なく　なるもんだな
I guess all you can do with a mouth that's been talking for over 300 years is talk smack, huh...

ほんとに　大丈夫かな　この　ポンコツ
Is this piece of junk really alright?

ファーック
Fuck!

ションベン　くせえ　ガキ　上等だよ！
You're a hell of a pain in the ass, ya brat!

p023
ボーイ　覚えとけよ　オレ　は　３００年間　この　星　で　生きのびてきたんだ　ほかのどの　ロボットより　優勝　て　こと　だ
Kid, remember this. I've been around on this planet for over 300 years, longer than any other robot.

へっ。。。とても　そうには見えないけどね
Heh... you don't look like it at all.

あんまり　アホ　な　人間　に　やくだつと　長生きできねえんだよ！
I haven't lived this long just to end up helping out some dumbass human!

とにかく　見はり　たのむよ。
Whatever, keep a lookout alright?

おい　ブルー
Hey, Blue!

チッ。。。ほんとに　まだ　ベビーだぜ
Che... He really is still just a baby.

もう　寝ちまいやがった
He already fell asleep.

ブルー　悪いが　相棒　に　なるんだ
Blue, I'm sorry but to become your friend,

おまえ　の　こと　調べさせてもらうぜ
I gotta do some research on you first.

脳波探知
Detecting brainwaves.

侵入開始
Initiating penetration.

p024
どうしたのブルー
What's the matter Blue?

そんなに　泥んこ　に　なって
Why are you covered in mud?

み。。。みんな　ボク　の　こと　よわむし　だって
E-... everyone was calling me a coward...

そんな　こと　ない　わ　ブルー　は　優しいだけよ
That's not true Blue, you're just kind.

ママ　は　そんな　ブルー　が　好きよ
Mommy likes that about you Blue.

う。。。　うう。。。
Uh... Uhh...

p025
ママ！　ママ！
Mama! Mama!

死んじゃいやだ！
I don't want you to die!

３００　年前。。。　地球から　この　ほし　に　来た　わたしたち　の　先祖　は
300 years ago... The people who came to this planet from Earth, our ancesters...

みんな　勇敢　で　やさしい　人たち　だったそうよ
They were all brave and kind people.

そして　地球　は　ブルー　の　宝石　の　よう　な　ほし　だったって　聞いたわ
And I've heard Earth is bluer than a gem...
(extreme improvisation?)

だから　あなたに　ブルーって　名　お　つけたの
That's why I gave you the name Blue...

。。。
...

ゴウ!　
Ahem (anyone know a better cough SFX in English?)

ゴウ　
Ahem!

はっ　ママ！
Ah! Mama!

だ。。。だから　ブルー。。。
That's why, Blue...

p026
いつまでも　今　の。。。
You should always...

今　の　ままで　いてね。。。
be like this, alright...?

マ。。。
Ma-...

マ。。。　ママ～
Ma-... Mama~!

ママ～！
Mama~!

p027
わっ！
Wah!

きたぜ　ファック　ボーイ　
Fuck, hey kid, here they are!

は！？　ど。。。どこだ！
Huh?! Whe-... where are they?!

まちな！
Lying in wait!

。。。
...

ボーイ　かこまれたぜ！
(!!!) Kid, let go of the past!

なっ。。。
Wha-...

なにい～！？
Whaaat?!

うわーっ！！
Uwaah!

p028
おわ！
Whoa!

シット！
Shit!

な。。。なにしてんだ　ポンコツ
Wha-... what the hell are ya doing ya piece o' junk?!

！！
!

ま。。。まさか
No... no way!

へへへ　あんまり　金持ち　の　御主人主人　じゃなさそうなんで
Hehehe, now then my penniless master,

ちょっと　電源　を　切って　エネルギー　の　節約　を。。。
cut off my power for a second so I can save my energy...

バ。。。バカヤロ～　ど。。。どうすんだよ　この　ポンクツ
A-... asshole! How am I supposed to do that, ya scrapheap?!

まあ　そう　カッカ　するな　手　は　あるんだ
Relax, you got hands don't you?

おまえ　銃　の　早撃ち　だけ　が　自慢だったな
Even though you're only good with them when quickdrawing.

む
Ugh!

つけてみろ！
Try wearing this!

なんだ　こりゃ？
What's this?

p029
ボーイ　見えるか？　
Kid, can you see anything?

ああ！
Yeah!

いいか　赤い　点滅　が　標的　を　とらえる　敵　が　あらわれたら　そこ　を　うてば　いい
Listen up, the red flashing light marks the target, shoot as soon as the target is exposed.

今度　は　大丈夫　だろうな
I should be alright now.

おまえ　の　腕　が　たしかなら　大丈夫だ
You should be, with your level of skill.

ちっ！
Che!

はっ！
Hah!

うっ！
Ugh!

右前方４５度だ！
45 degrees to the right!

p030
ぐわっ
Argh!

めいちゅうだ　ファック　ボーイ　
Fuckin' bullseye kid!

ああ
Yeah.

ふ～
Phew.

む！？
Huh?!

ふ。。。ふたりか！？
Two... two of them?!

はっ
Ah!

いや　３人だ！
No, there's three!

いや！　よ。。。４人だ！
Wait! Fo-... four!

p031
うおお～！
Whooo!　

わは！
Waha!

ぐあっ
Guah!

やったぜ　４人　とも　命中だぜ
You got 'em! You got all four of them!

はーはー
Hah... hah...

う！？
Huh?!

後ろだ！
Behind me!

まて！　撃つな！
Wait! Don't shoot!

なに！？
What?!

その　標的　は　武器　を　持ってないぞ！
That target is unarmed!

子供だ！
It's a kid!

な。。。なんで　こんな　所　に　子供が
Wha-... what's a kid doing in this place?

p033
か。。。かえせー　どうしてだよ！
Give... give him back! Why'd you do it?!

おまえたち　が　おまえたち　が　父さんたちから　チケット　を　だまし取ったから　取り返しに来ただけなのに！
You guys... you guys... dad and the others just came to take back the ticket after you tricked him into handing it over!

なぜ　殺したー！
Why'd you kill him?!

う！
Ugh!

かえせー　かえせー！
Give him back! Give him back!

ど。。。どういうことだ
Wha-... what's going on?!

うわーん！
Uwaaah!

そこまでだ　動くな！
That's enough. Freeze!

あっ！？
Wha?!

p034
ＯＫ。　現行犯だ　ボウズ！
Caught you right in the act, boy!

ワ。。。ワイザーさん　
Mi-... mister Waizaa...

こ。。。これは　一体!?
Wha-... what is all this?!

とんでもないヤツですね　こいつ　は　市民　を　５にん　も　撃ち殺しおった
What a despicable guy, he shot and killed five civilians.

あっ！
Ah!

お。。。おまえたちわ　あの　時　の！？
You... you're those guys from this afternoon!

フフ。。。あの　時　は　世話　に　なったな。。。
Hehe... you did us a favour back then...

ち。。。ちょっと　ワイザーさん　
Hold on a sec, mister Waizaa,

これは　どういうことなんだ？
what's going on here?

p035
ていこうするな！
Don't resist!

ぐは！
Guah!

ファック！
Fuck!

ボーイ！
Kid!

う。。。う。。。
Ugh... uh...

あ
Ah!

あっ
Ah!

あいつだ　あいづだ！
That's them, they did it!

あいつが　父さんたち　を　だましたんだ！
They were the ones who tricked dad and the others!

え！
Huh?!

p036
その　ガキ　の　いうとおりだ　フフフ。。。
Hehe, it's just like that kid says...

そいつ　の　父親たちが。。。　まきあげた　チケット　を　しつこく　奪いかえそうと　するんで　処理　に　困っていたんだ
His father... when it seemed they managed to get hold of a ticket we became worried and had to get rid of them.

だが　ブルー　きみ　の　殺し　の　現場　は　しっかり　ビデオ　に　とってある
But now, Blue, we have you killing them on tape.

おまえ　は　殺人者と　して　死ぬ　こと　に　なる
You'll die a murderer.

き。。。きさま　オ。。。オレ　を　だまして
You... you bastard... tricking me...

人殺しに
into killing people...

ファック
Fuck!

ここだよ　ボウズ
This is it kid.

だまされる　ほう　が　わるいんだ
It's your fault for being fooled so easily.

ガキめ　が　あの　時　の　仕返し　を　してやるぜえ！
Fucking brat, this is payback for what you did earlier!

よくも　オレ　の　顔　半分　ふきとばしてくれたな～
How dare you ruin half of my face like that!

p037
う。。。
Ugh...

フヒヒ
Hehe.

くく。。。
Kuh...

けふあ
Argh!

ピピイ　
Beep beep

フファック　クソヤロウ！　
Fu-, fuck! Asshole!

ポンコツ　おまえも　うせろ！
Spare parts, you get out of my sight too!

ギャピー
Gyabeep!

p038
フハハハハ
Bwhuahaha!

あ。。。あ。。。
Ah... ah...

そして　最後　は　この　ガキだ！
Now all that's left to take care off is this brat!

や。。。やめろ
Sto-... stop it!

そ。。。その　子　だけ　は　やめろ！
At... at least spare the boy!

ダメだ！
No can do!

やめろー！
Stop it!

p039
ぐは！
Argh!

あああ
Aaaah!

ふー　ボウズ　ごくろうさん
Kid, I appreciate the hard work.

ゲーム　オーバーだ！
But it's game over for you!

き。。。きさまら～！
You... you bastaaards!

p040
うおお～！
Wooooh!

撃て撃てえ　ヒャハハハ！　
Fire in the hole! Hahaha!

p041
No text

p042
あああ！
Aaaah!

あと　は　処理班　に　まかせて引き　あげるぞ！
We'll leave the clean-up to the disposal unit!

p043
デ。。。デ。。。レ。。。ロ。。。お。。。おい。。。
De... de... re... ro... he-... hey...

お。。。おい　ピーガー。。。ブルー
He-... hey piigaa (???)... Blue...

もう　死んじまったのか。。。！？
He's already dead...?!

あ。。。あ。。。
Ah... ah...

もう　ダメみたいだ
Looks like I'm done for, huh?

ファック　オレ　は　おめえ　に　初めて　会った　時　から
Fuck, ever since we first met,

早死　に　しそう　な　ヤツ　だ　と　思っていたよ
I thought you were the kinda guy to die prematurely.

オレ　は　今　まで　３００年間　人間　を　見てきて　たまに　おめえみたい　な　ヤツ　に　出会ったが
Over the past 300 years I've been observing humans and every once in a while I encountered a guy like you, but...

みんな　早死にだった
they all died prematurely.

p044
そうだったのか
Is that so...

わ。。。悪かったな　あんたまで　まきこんで
I... I'm sorry I got you involved in all this...

そ。。。そういえば　まだ　あんた　の　名まえ　を　聞いてなかったな
Co-... come to think of it, I still don't know your name...

コンピューター　ナンバー　は　ＺＺ７０１１だ　な　は　ない
My computer number is ZZ 7011, I don't have a name.

そうか　き。。。記号で　呼ぶの　は　さびしいな
I see... calling you by your number is pretty depressing isn't it?

じ。。。じゃあ
The-... then...

その　ずんぐり　した　体型　から　とって
(!!!!) How about something that fits your body? (unless you know how to fit short + wide in there...)

ファッシて　の　は　どうだい
How does Vash sound?

 

[PossesedNinja]

[Shonen] Zokusei ch1

Before you look at my somewhat noobish translations, I would like to thank you for actually taking the time to help me.
Also, here are the raws (warning...ecchi)
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_004.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_005.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_006.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_007.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_008.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_009.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y300/disturbedfan101/01_010.jpg
Ph1
B1: In my neighbor's large apartment room there is,

B2: Itekimasu (something said when entering a house)
b3: ...!!

b4:Fuaaaa

B5: ah.. Good morning ___-kun (Seemed to omit maincharacters name with 2 large circles :P)

b6: A very beautiful college onee-san.
pg2

Thought: I am always defenceless against when she comes out like that (??)
B1: umm... Good morning.

B2: My my, Why is your face red?

B3(top): no... that is.. um... nothing
(bottom): Umm.. the reason is

B4: Ummm

b5: Hmm what to do with you....

b6: ...!!

b7: Thats it!

Outsidebox: Always

b8: "Onee-san is beautiful today too."

Ouside: I

B9: you must say those words direct from your mouth.

pg3:

b1:No.. uhhmm..sorry.

b2:ahaha, It's a joke, a joke.

Thought: Making fun of me.

B3: Embarrased and cute.

Thought: always

B4:Is it okay if I take such good sweets?

b5: Yes, my parents made it.

thought: My neighbor was my cousin

B6: You're always taking care of me.

Thought: She has good manners

Thought: She is well known for being a serious college student

Thought: But when I'm with her
B7: Waaaa! I'm late! I'm late!

B8: ____-kun

Pg4:
B1:waa

B2: haha, you're soaked.

b3: Eh, ah.

B4: !!!

b5:?
B5(bottom): Why is your ....?

B6: No, uhmmm

b7: sh... Showering and naked!!

B8: fufufu...Why are you blushing and excited?
Pg5:

B1: It's no use to fuss about what you just saw.

B2:Or else, what strange things are you imagining?

B3: No... that is...ummm.

b4: ...!?

b5: ah ___-kun, that test

b5b2: What did you get on it?

b6: oh... I did poorly.
Pg6:

B1: Let me see that.

b2: ah, umm...

b3: O...Ok...

b4: I-It's full of m-mistakes, so t-that's why...

B5: ......

b6: She suddenly has a serious face.

B7: ___-kun. this sentence.

B8: Eh?

b9: Look, this verb acts this way.

b10: The translation becomes like this.

b11: Ah... You're right.

b12: you think your unluckyness is convienent if...

b13: Onee-san helps you study?

b14: eh?

Pg7:
b1: Even though things may appear this way, I once tried to be a teacher.

Thought: Sometimes she is mean, one side of her is serious.

b2: I will teach you facts myself so you also succeed

thought: Nearby is my onee-san

b3: Onee-san...

b4: subsequently, I can teach you a special study of lust.

Thought: Usually, I...

Thought: Am made fun of.

B5: !!!

B6:Ahahaha, It's a joke, a joke!

b7: You're so cuuuuute.

I think I got most of page 3 and 6 wrong.
Also, sorry if I wasted your time cause my translations are crap .

 

[njt]

Re: [Shonen] Zokusei ch1

hmm thanks for posting this up (was *cough* a bit eroi )

anyway run through this, read it to yourself and think does this sound natural?

If not, think about changing the word order to sound better (Jp and Eng are a bit different after all) and post your redone script below this . I'll look it over later

 

[njt]

Re: [Seinen] Cyber Blue v01 c01a

OK I've gone through and taken out all the spaces... since it was just really really really hard to read how it was (thanks for taking the effort to write the jp, next time no spaces between each character though ). Next step will be the checking of the trans... I'll update this when I've gotten more to show Also thanks for supplying the raw it'll help out a lot


p004
新人類創造！！の巻。。。５
A newly created kind of man! ...5 (/A new kind of man!)

死ぬのはきさまだ！！の巻。。。７３
You're gonna die bastard! ...73

その弾丸に怒りをの巻。。。９５
(Filling?) That bullet with hatred ...95

最後の警官の巻。。。１１５
The last policeman ...115

故郷での再会の巻。。。１３５
Reunion at birthplace ...135

忘れえぬ場所の巻。。。１５９
Unforgettable place ...159

死の笑みお与える！！の巻。。。１８１
Giving the smile of death! ...181

p005
地球から最も遠い植民惑星テイノス　（the "I" is small but I have no idea what "Tinosu" could mean)
The farthest planet in colonized space, "Tinosu".

地球の半分程の空気と寒冷な気候そして砂漠の大地
The atmosphere is only half that of Earth, the climate cold and the surface desert-like.

新人類創造！！の巻
A newly created kind of man!

風に巻きあげられた砂塵はいつもそらをあかくそめ
Clouds of dust blown up by the wind make for a constantly crimson colored sky.

その苛酷な環境のもとでは人類はつねに生命維持装置を身にまといその装置と共生せねば生きていけなかった
The harsh circumstances have forced people to live on life-support systems. Having these devices installed is necessary in order to survive.

この星に最初の開拓者が降り立って３００有余年開拓者たちの夢はすべてに朽ち果て富める者たちにとってこの星はもはや故郷ではなかった
It's been over 300 years since the first settlers arrived on this planet. In time, their dreams have withered away. The rich do not consider this planet their home and have started to long for Earth.

p006/007
この星を故郷とする人びとは棄てるられた民
Those who do consider this planet their home have been abandoned.

かれらを救う者はまだ生まれていないこの星のための新しいき人類は
Their savior has not yet been born.

新人類創造！！の巻
A newly created kind of man!

p008
2305
２３０５年
ージャンクシテイー
2305
Junk City

さあさあ！こいつは出物だよ！
Look at this! This's second hand!

PG301V型生命維持コンピューターだ！
A type PG301V life-support system computer!

超小型とはいかないがこれだけの代物がたったの１８００バックスだ！
If you got this super small model you don't need anything else! Get it for just 1800 bucks!

た。。。たしかに安いな
Tha-... that's pretty cheap.

でもおっさんこいつは本当に使えるのかい？
But mister, does it really work?

p009
ん！？どうしたんだ？
Huh?! What's up with you?

ゼエ
Zee...

ハーゼエ。。。
Haa...zee...

なんだおまえせいめいいじそうちおつけてねえのか！？
What the hell? You're not using a life-support system?!

ここへ来るとちょうかっぱわれたんだ。。。
On the way here it was stolen from me...

ほお～
Ho~

そいつはらっきーだな！
That guy's pretty lucky huh!

このオンピューターを試すことができるんだホラ
Here, try this computer on for size!

あ。。ああ
A... alright.

p010
す～
Su~

は～効くなこいつは
Ha~ It's working.

あたりまえだこの星じゃ酸素供給システムをもたなきゃいきていけねえ
Of course! If you're ain't got an oxigen supply system there's no way you could survive on this planet.

もう買うしかねえだろ！
You gotta buy it!

1800 バックスだ！
It's 1800 bucks!

ああ
Yeah.

買うよ
I'll buy it.

毎度あり
Nice doing business with you.

ふ～
Ugh~

さあさあこいつは出物だよイオン化酸素透過システムつきだよ～！
Ladies and gentlemen! Come have a look at this second hand oxygen [... ] system!

え。。。！？
Huh...?!

p011
お。。おい
He-...hey!

さあさあいらっしゃい
Step right up people!

ち。。。ちょっとまてよおっさん！
Wa-...wait a second mister!

今金をはらっただろ品物を渡せよ！
I just gave you the money, that thing is mine now!

ん～！？
Huh?!

１８００バックスは酸素一回分だよ！
1800 bucks will get you a single dose!

ボウヤ！
Brat!

く。。。くそ汚ねえぞおやじ～金かえせ！
Shi-...shit! That's dirty you old bastard, gimme back my money!

あっちへ行かんか！
Get lost!

かえせーっ
Give it back!

あっちへ行けといっとるのが～
Didn't I tell you to get lost?!

わからんかーっ！
What don't you get about that?!

p012
ぐくっ
Gukuh

おいハエをはらえ
!!! (Hey, make him pay up?)

へい！
Aight!

オラアガキはお家へ帰んな
Hey brat, how 'bout you go home!

いやなら殺してやってもいいぜ～
If you don't wanna we'll just kill you right here.

p013
うく。。。
Ugh...

おら～
Hey~

なら撃てよ
Then shoot me.

ふっ。。。
Huh...

いいかこの国じゃガキひとりぐらいしんだってだれも見むきもしねえんだぜ
You sure? No one'll notice when a brat like you's died in this country.

いいから撃てよ！
Cut the crap already and shoot!

バカめ死んねや！
Retard, just die!

p014
no text

p015
ゲヒッ
Argh!

う！
Urk!

ガキめ
You brat!

うっ
Ugh!

わ。。。
I...

わ。。。わかったも。。。もっていけ
I... I got it. Ju-... just take it.

くそ！
Fuck!

p016
ふ～
Phew~

ん！？
Huh?!

な。。。なんだこのホースは！？
Wha-...what's this hose?

ビ。。。ビ。。。
beep...beep...

う？
Uh?

ファーック！
Fu~uck!

乱暴にするなよ新しいご主人様よ！
Don't be so rude, new master!

p017
う。。。う。。。
Uh... uh...

大型で旧式のポンコツをつかまされたのかちくしょ～
I... I got this huge old piece of junk?! Son of a bitch!

ボーイ外見ではんだんするんじゃねえ
Hey kid, don't judge by appearances!

ボーイ　
Kid!

おまえいくつだ！？
How old are you?!

１７だ
I'm 17.

そいつはいいや！
Isn't that nice!

まだ青いケツにくそをつけてるガキじゃねえかでかい口たたくな！
Even though you're still wet behind the ears, you're already talking smack?!

な。。。なにじゃあおまえはいくつなんだ
Wha-...what? Then how old are you?

３００だ！
I'm 300!

さ。。。３００～！
Thr-...300!

か～それは旧式なんてもんじゃないほとんど化石じゃないか！？
Ah, is that an old model I see there? Looks like it's from the stone age!

おい大丈夫か？
Hey, are you alright?

む？
Huh?

きみのガンさばき見せてもらったよ
You showed me your judgment-by-gun. (err...)

なんだあんた！？
Who're you?!

p018
わたしはSPC のワイザー(no idea) だ！
SPC = Security Police Company
I'm [Waizaa] from the S.P.C.!

保安官！？
The sheriff?!

今の連中はわたしの部下が逮捕に行った金はとり戻してやるよ！
Those guys were my subordinates, but after they've been arrested I'll give you back your money!

そ。。。そうですか
Re-... really?

それよりも今のきみの腕をみてひとつ話があるんだが
More importantly, there's something I want to ask about what you did just now.

えっ？
Huh?

これが何だかわかるかね
You know what this is, right?

p019
あっそ。。。それは
Ah, tha-... that's...

地球行きのチケット！
A ticked into space!

そうだだれもがほしがあるスペースシップのチケットだ！
That's right. It's a ticket for anyone that wants to go on a space ship!

だが現状ではこのチケットをてにいれることがてきるのはごく一部のエリートかかなりの金持ちだけだ
But currently, the only ones with enough money to get their hands on a ticket like this are the elite.

そのためにこの街はチケットをめぐって恐るべき数の人間数殺されている
(!!!) For it to be like that, a terribly large numbers of people are being killed.

だがあいにく優秀な人材にとぼしくてね我われもその犯罪防止に手を焼いている
Unfortunately however, these elites aren't very capable. Even we are having a hard time fighting crime.

どうだわたしの仕事を手伝ってはくれんか
What do you say? Will you accept this job offering and help us out?

え。。。仕事を
Uh... A job...

文無しで仕事もないのだろう
You're broke and unemployed, aren't you?

ボーナスははずむよ
You'll receive bonuses.

あ。。。は。。。はい！
Ah... a-... alright!

やってくれるかよしきみを保安官助手に任命しよう
You made the right decision. Now, let me appoint you deputy sheriff.

きみの名は？
What's your name?

はい！ブ。。ブルーです！
Right! It... it's Blue!

p020
ブルーかいい名だ
Blue huh? That's a nice name!

それではブルー早速仕事だ
Now then, Blue, time to get started on the job.

今夜ここに強盗がはいるとの情報がはいったのだ警備にいってくれ
We have information that a burglary will take place here tonight, please defend the place.

は。。。はい！
Al... alright!

素直ないい返事だ
That's what I wanted to hear!

わたしは優秀な若者が好きだよ
If only all young men were good guys like you.

ラッキーだぜ仕事にありつけた
Awesome, I got job!

よしさっそくいくぞおめおも。。。
Alright, let's get going. You too...

フ。。。フ。。。ピ。。。
Fu-... fu-... beep...

ファ。。。ク
Fu-... ck.

どうした！？
What's wrong?!

エ。。。エネルギーが切れた
I... I've run out of energy.

お。。。おまえ金もってねえか
You... you got any money?

ないよ！
I don't!

う。。。目がまわるピ。。。が。。。まわる
Ugh... Eyes... closing... Shutting... down...

p021
う。。。うわ。。。ダ。。。ダメダ死ぬ
Uh... huh... it... it's no good, it's dead.

しょうがねえな
I guess there's no other way.

これだけは使いたくなかったんだが
This was the one thing I didn't wanna use.

ラ。。。ラッキー！
Lu-... lucky~!

ぷはー生き返るぜ！
Phew~ I'm alive again!

サンキュー相棒仲よくたろうぜ
Thanks pal, I got a feeling you and I'll be getting real close.

フ。。。おまえのおかげで一文なしだよ
Heh... thanks to you, I became someone important.

ボーイおまえなんか懐かしいにおいがするぜ
Kid, you smell kinda nostalgic.

なんだそりゃー
What the hell?!

３００年前にはおまえみたいなお人好しがいっぱいいたんだよ
300 years ago there were lots of charming guys like you.

ちぇっいってろ！
!!! (Get lost!)?

p022
ここか？
Here?

中で待機だ
My orders are inside.

オーケー赤ちゃん！
OK baby!

敵があらわれたああ教えてくれよ
What's up with the hostility?

ファーック
Fu~uck!

ベビーベッドでもさがしな　
!!!! ('Cause you're looking for a crib.) ?

３００年も生きてると口が汚なくなるもんだな
I guess all you can do with a mouth that's been talking for over 300 years is talk smack, huh...

ほんとに大丈夫かなこのポンコツ
Is this piece of junk really alright?

ファーック
Fuck!

ションベンくせえガキ上等だよ！
You're a hell of a pain in the ass, ya brat!

p023
ボーイ覚えとけよオレは３００年間この星で生きのびてきたんだほかのどのロボットより優勝てことだ
Kid, remember this. I've been around on this planet for over 300 years, longer than any other robot.

へっ。。。とてもそうには見えないけどね
Heh... you don't look like it at all.

あんまりアホな人間にやくだつと長生きできねえんだよ！
I haven't lived this long just to end up helping out some dumbass human!

とにかく見はりたのむよ。
Whatever, keep a lookout alright?

おいブルー
Hey, Blue!

チッ。。。ほんとにまだベビーだぜ
Che... He really is still just a baby.

もう寝ちまいやがった
He already fell asleep.

ブルー悪いが相棒になるんだ
Blue, I'm sorry but to become your friend,

おまえのこと調べさせてもらうぜ
I gotta do some research on you first.

脳波探知
Detecting brainwaves.

侵入開始
Initiating penetration.

p024
どうしたのブルー
What's the matter Blue?

そんなに泥んこになって
Why are you covered in mud?

み。。。みんなボクのことよわむしだって
E-... everyone was calling me a coward...

そんなことないわブルーは優しいだけよ
That's not true Blue, you're just kind.

ママはそんなブルーが好きよ
Mommy likes that about you Blue.

う。。。うう。。。
Uh... Uhh...

p025
ママ！ママ！
Mama! Mama!

死んじゃいやだ！
I don't want you to die!

３００年前。。。地球からこのほしに来たわたしたちの先祖は
300 years ago... The people who came to this planet from Earth, our ancesters...

みんな勇敢でやさしい人たちだったそうよ
They were all brave and kind people.

そして地球はブルーの宝石のようなほしだったって聞いたわ
And I've heard Earth is bluer than a gem...
(extreme improvisation?)

だからあなたにブルーって名おつけたの
That's why I gave you the name Blue...

。。。
...

ゴウ!　
Ahem (anyone know a better cough SFX in English?)

ゴウ　
Ahem!

はっママ！
Ah! Mama!

だ。。。だからブルー。。。
That's why, Blue...

p026
いつまでも今の。。。
You should always...

今のままでいてね。。。
be like this, alright...?

マ。。。
Ma-...

マ。。。ママ～
Ma-... Mama~!

ママ～！
Mama~!

p027
わっ！
Wah!

きたぜファックボーイ　
Fuck, hey kid, here they are!

は！？ど。。。どこだ！
Huh?! Whe-... where are they?!

まちな！
Lying in wait!

。。。
...

ボーイかこまれたぜ！
(!!!) Kid, let go of the past!

なっ。。。
Wha-...

なにい～！？
Whaaat?!

うわーっ！！
Uwaah!

p028
おわ！
Whoa!

シット！
Shit!

な。。。なにしてんだポンコツ
Wha-... what the hell are ya doing ya piece o' junk?!

！！
!

ま。。。まさか
No... no way!

へへへあんまり金持ちの御主人主人じゃなさそうなんで
Hehehe, now then my penniless master,

ちょっと電源を切ってエネルギーの節約を。。。
cut off my power for a second so I can save my energy...

バ。。。バカヤロ～ど。。。どうすんだよこのポンクツ
A-... asshole! How am I supposed to do that, ya scrapheap?!

まあそうカッカするな手はあるんだ
Relax, you got hands don't you?

おまえ銃の早撃ちだけが自慢だったな
Even though you're only good with them when quickdrawing.

む
Ugh!

つけてみろ！
Try wearing this!

なんだこりゃ？
What's this?

p029
ボーイ見えるか？　
Kid, can you see anything?

ああ！
Yeah!

いいか赤い点滅が標的をとらえる敵があらわれたらそこをうてばいい
Listen up, the red flashing light marks the target, shoot as soon as the target is exposed.

今度は大丈夫だろうな
I should be alright now.

おまえの腕がたしかなら大丈夫だ
You should be, with your level of skill.

ちっ！
Che!

はっ！
Hah!

うっ！
Ugh!

右前方４５度だ！
45 degrees to the right!

p030
ぐわっ
Argh!

めいちゅうだファックボーイ　
Fuckin' bullseye kid!

ああ
Yeah.

ふ～
Phew.

む！？
Huh?!

ふ。。。ふたりか！？
Two... two of them?!

はっ
Ah!

いや３人だ！
No, there's three!

いや！よ。。。４人だ！
Wait! Fo-... four!

p031
うおお～！
Whooo!　

わは！
Waha!

ぐあっ
Guah!

やったぜ４人とも命中だぜ
You got 'em! You got all four of them!

はーはー
Hah... hah...

う！？
Huh?!

後ろだ！
Behind me!

まて！　撃つな！
Wait! Don't shoot!

なに！？
What?!

その標的は武器を持ってないぞ！
That target is unarmed!

子供だ！
It's a kid!

な。。。なんでこんな所に子供が
Wha-... what's a kid doing in this place?

p033
か。。。かえせーどうしてだよ！
Give... give him back! Why'd you do it?!

おまえたちがおまえたちが父さんたちからチケットをだまし取ったから取り返しに来ただけなのに！
You guys... you guys... dad and the others just came to take back the ticket after you tricked him into handing it over!

なぜ殺したー！
Why'd you kill him?!

う！
Ugh!

かえせーかえせー！
Give him back! Give him back!

ど。。。どういうことだ
Wha-... what's going on?!

うわーん！
Uwaaah!

そこまでだ動くな！
That's enough. Freeze!

あっ！？
Wha?!

p034
ＯＫ。現行犯だボウズ！
Caught you right in the act, boy!

ワ。。。ワイザーさん　
Mi-... mister Waizaa...

こ。。。これは一体!?
Wha-... what is all this?!

とんでもないヤツですねこいつは市民を５にんも撃ち殺しおった
What a despicable guy, he shot and killed five civilians.

あっ！
Ah!

お。。。おまえたちわあの時の！？
You... you're those guys from this afternoon!

フフ。。。あの時は世話になったな。。。
Hehe... you did us a favour back then...

ち。。。ちょっとワイザーさん　
Hold on a sec, mister Waizaa,

これはどういうことなんだ？
what's going on here?

p035
ていこうするな！
Don't resist!

ぐは！
Guah!

ファック！
Fuck!

ボーイ！
Kid!

う。。。う。。。
Ugh... uh...

あ
Ah!

あっ
Ah!

あいつだ　あいづだ！
That's them, they did it!

あいつが父さんたちをだましたんだ！
They were the ones who tricked dad and the others!

え！
Huh?!

p036
そのガキのいうとおりだフフフ。。。
Hehe, it's just like that kid says...

そいつの父親たちが。。。まきあげたチケットをしつこく奪いかえそうとするんで処理　に困っていたんだ
His father... when it seemed they managed to get hold of a ticket we became worried and had to get rid of them.

だがブルーきみの殺しの現場はしっかりビデオにとってある
But now, Blue, we have you killing them on tape.

おまえは殺人者として死ぬことになる
You'll die a murderer.

き。。。きさまオ。。。オレをだまして
You... you bastard... tricking me...

人殺しに
into killing people...

ファック
Fuck!

ここだよボウズ
This is it kid.

だまされるほうがわるいんだ
It's your fault for being fooled so easily.

ガキめがあの時の仕返しをしてやるぜえ！
Fucking brat, this is payback for what you did earlier!

よくもオレの顔半分ふきとばしてくれたな～
How dare you ruin half of my face like that!

p037
う。。。
Ugh...

フヒヒ
Hehe.

くく。。。
Kuh...

けふあ
Argh!

ピピイ　
Beep beep

フファッククソヤロウ！　
Fu-, fuck! Asshole!

ポンコツおまえもうせろ！
Spare parts, you get out of my sight too!

ギャピー
Gyabeep!

p038
フハハハハ
Bwhuahaha!

あ。。。あ。。。
Ah... ah...

そして最後はこのガキだ！
Now all that's left to take care off is this brat!

や。。。やめろ
Sto-... stop it!

そ。。。その子だけはやめろ！
At... at least spare the boy!

ダメだ！
No can do!

やめろー！
Stop it!

p039
ぐは！
Argh!

あああ
Aaaah!

ふーボウズごくろうさん
Kid, I appreciate the hard work.

ゲームオーバーだ！
But it's game over for you!

き。。。きさまら～！
You... you bastaaards!

p040
うおお～！
Wooooh!

撃て撃てえヒャハハハ！　
Fire in the hole! Hahaha!

p041
No text

p042
あああ！
Aaaah!

あとは処理班にまかせて引きあげるぞ！
We'll leave the clean-up to the disposal unit!

p043
デ。。。デ。。。レ。。。ロ。。。お。。おい。。。
De... de... re... ro... he-... hey...

お。。。おいピーガー。。。ブルー
He-... hey piigaa (???)... Blue...

もう死んじまったのか。。。！？
He's already dead...?!

あ。。。あ。。。
Ah... ah...

もうダメみたいだ
Looks like I'm done for, huh?

ファックオレはおめえに初めて会った時から
Fuck, ever since we first met,

早死にしそうなヤツだと思っていたよ
I thought you were the kinda guy to die prematurely.

オレは今まで３００年間人間を見てきてたまにおめえみたいなヤツに出会ったが
Over the past 300 years I've been observing humans and every once in a while I encountered a guy like you, but...

みんな早死にだった
they all died prematurely.

p044
そうだったのか
Is that so...

わ。。。悪かったなあんたまで　まきこんで
I... I'm sorry I got you involved in all this...

そ。。。そういえばまだあんたの名まえを聞いてなかったな
Co-... come to think of it, I still don't know your name...

コンピューターナンバーはＺＺ７０１１だなはない
My computer number is ZZ 7011, I don't have a name.

そうかき。。。記号で呼ぶのはさびしいな
I see... calling you by your number is pretty depressing isn't it?

じ。。。じゃあ
The-... then...

そのずんぐりした体型からとって
(!!!!) How about something that fits your body? (unless you know how to fit short + wide in there...)

ファッシてのはどうだい
How does Vash sound?

 

[PossesedNinja]

Re: [Shonen] Zokusei ch1

hmm thanks for posting this up (was *cough* a bit eroi )

anyway run through this, read it to yourself and think does this sound natural?

If not, think about changing the word order to sound better (Jp and Eng are a bit different after all) and post your redone script below this . I'll look it over later

Roger that.
Ph1
thought: In the large apartment next to mine,

B2: Itekimasu (something said when entering a house)
b3: ...!!

b4:Fuaaaa

B5: ah.. Good morning ___-kun (Seemed to omit maincharacters name with 2 large circles :P)

Thought: there is a very beautiful college onee-san.
pg2

Thought: I am always defenceless against when she comes out like that (??)

B1: umm... Good morning.

B2: My my, Why is your face red?

B3(top): no... that is.. um... nothing
(bottom): Umm.. its because...

B4: Ummm

b5: Hmm what to do with you....

b6: ...!!

b7: Thats it!

Outsidebox: Always

b8: "Onee-san is beautiful today too."

Ouside: I

B9: you must say those words directly from your mouth.

pg3:

b1:No.. uhhmm..sorry.

b2:ahaha, It's a joke, a joke.

Thought: Making fun of me.

B3: Embarrassed and cute.

Thought: For as long as I can remember (Eh, it just says always but this sounds better?)

B4:Is it okay if I take such good candy?

b5: Yes, my parents made it.

thought: My neighbor was my cousin

B6: You're always taking care of me. (def, not sure on this)

Thought: She has good manners

Thought: She is popular because she is a serious college student

Thought: But whenever I'm with her

B7: Waaaa! I'm late! I'm late!

B8: ____-kun

Pg4:
B1:waa

B2: haha, you're soaking wet now.

b3: Eh, ah.

B4: !!!

b5:?
B5(bottom): Why is your ....?

B6: No, uhmmm

b7: sh... she's showering and naked!!

B8: fufufu...Why are you blushing and excited?
Pg5:

B1: It's no use to fuss about what you just saw.

B2:Or, what strange things are you imagining?

B3: No... that is...ummm.

b4: ...!?

b5: ah ___-kun, that test

b5b2: What did you get on it?

b6: oh... I did poorly.
Pg6:

B1: Let me see that.

b2: ah, umm...

b3: O...Ok...

b4: I-It's full of m-mistakes, so t-that's why...

B5: ......

b6: She suddenly has a serious face.

B7: ___-kun. this sentence.

B8: Eh?

b9: Look, this verb acts this way.

b10: The translation turns into this.

b11: Ah... You're right.

b12: you think your unluckyness is convienent if... (not sure)

b13: Onee-san helps you study? (not sure)

b14: eh?

Pg7:
b1: Even though things may appear this way, I once tried to be a teacher. (not sure... again)

Thought: One side of her she is cold (mean?), the other side of her is serious.

b2: I will teach you facts myself so you also succeed (not sure)

thought: Nearby is my onee-san (not sure)

b3: Onee-san...

b4: subsequently, I can teach you a special study of lust. (sigh...not sure)

Thought: Usually, I...

Thought: Am made fun of.

B5: !!!

B6:Ahahaha, It's a joke, a joke!

b7: You're so cuuuuute.

 

[njt]

Re: [Shonen] Zokusei ch1

haha that was a bit too fast .

For example this:

b8: "Onee-san is beautiful today too."

Ouside: I

B9: you must say those words directly from your mouth.

Could you actually hear someone say this?

Or wouldn't it be better like this:

b8: If you say "You look beautiful, like always"

Ouside: I

B9: I'll let you pass by

or

b8: If you want to get by me, let me hear you say

Ouside: I

B9: "You look beautiful, like always" from those two lips of yours

if you think the rest looks fine enough leave it be, if not post your fixes after this


=EDIT=
Also, this was the first translation posted in this forum, so it got a lot of great advice from some of our translators here.

http://mangahelpers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27351

Read it as well as the comments, it should help you as well