Gintama 318

See you guys are lucky. Saturn Bomberman is sitting on my bed, wearing a revealing slip gown, and stretching it's legs, waiting for me to partake. After all, I'm already two weeks behind, although it's not my fault. Well, I'm off to become a 'Bomber' man.

Check before using. Otherwise wait for Hi wa mata noboru to scan.

(Bottom text- It’s coming back again this year! Treasure Island 2010!! Gintama lessons 1~3 will be up, along with a special selection of chapters! Don’t forget, that it’s all completely free of charge!! Run, don’t walk to page 381 for more details!!)
(Side text- Start with a bang!)
(Sfx- Gang an gang an gan* Bam bam bam bam*)
Gintoki: ...Wha? Why won't you say anything?
Shinpachi: What’s the matter, Gin-san?
(Sfx- Gan gan *ban bam*)
(Bag- Ooedo supermarket.)
Gintoki: This TV bastard has shut its eyes tight and showing me a dark face.
Kagura: Maybe it is upset? It does not fit in with this new digital TV.
Shinpachi: We’ve had this one forever! Shouldn’t you go buy a new one?
Gintoki: Hey, I’m not giving up hope THAT easily. More like, quit talking like we have spare cash.
(Sfx- Gang an *bam bam*)
Shinpachi: Hold on…
Did the TV always look like this?
Gintoki: Hmm? Come to think of it, you’re right.
Kagura: The Edobashi camera man came, and he left us that thing in a box this afternoon.
Could it be that a customer has sent it to us as thanks?
Gintoki: I don't remember volunteering for trash collection.
(Sfx- Buchiii *zzzt*)
Shinpachi: Hey look! It’s on!!
Gin-san, you fixed it!

002
Gintoki: There's a sorta familiar face showing on it
Though it's a mug I don't wanna see right in my face.
Sacchan: This TV is 3-D compatible.
Gintoki: 3-D huh? That’s pretty awesome.
So when I’m sick of what’s on TV, what do I do?
Sacchan: Press this button with your lips please.
Gintoki: Got it.
Hey Sadaharu, turn this off, will ya? This stupid piece of crap TV from reality all together.
(Sfx- Wan! *Woof!*)
(Sfx- Gabuunnn *Glooomp*)
Sacchan: GAHHHHHH!!!
Gintoki: Bulky piece of trash.
Sadaharu: Woof!
Sacchan: Wait! Wait! Hold on!!

003
(Sfx- Gashaaan *crash*)
Sacchan: Ahhhhhh!!!
Shinpachi: What’s the matter?
Sacchan: Oh nothing, it’s just that my glasses seem to be broken…
Kagura: Were they important?
Sacchan: Huh? Oh yes, a little…
No, they're really not important... They're just a cheap little trinket, pay them no mind.
Sure, were the ones that my dead grandmother...
Gintoki: ….Say what?
Shinpachi: Let me take a look at them…
......A~~h, it's not just the lenses, even the frame is done for... Maybe you should consider buying another pair.

004
Sacchan: I see….
Well, it's not a big deal. I know I called it an heirloom, but it's okay, really. You don't need to worry.
Kagura: But Sacchan, your eyes are tearing up.
Sacchan: N-No, it's just that a broken piece of the glasses... got in my eye, is all.
Shinpachi: Eh? Are you sure you're going to be okay?
Kagura: Let me see.
I think it will be fine, but your eye is scarlet red.
I think it is best we take it seriously and bring you to a hospital.
Shinpachi: But it’ll be hard for her to get there without her glasses….maybe I should go too?
Sacchan: No, I'm fine. You really don't need to worry about me.
Kagura: It does not need to be a boy, I can go with you Sacchan.
Gintoki: HOLD IT!!!
WHY DO I FEEL SO BAD?! IT’S LIKE I’M PLAYING DODGEBALL AND I ACCIDENTLY HIT ONE OF THE GIRLS IN THE FACE!! WHY DO I FEEL SO DAMNED GUILTY?!
First off, it’s not like the ball hit her by accident is it?!
I'm pretty sure she purposely let to ball hit her so her glasses would get broken!!
Sacchan: I’m sorry for making you feel bad Gin-san…
Really, you don't need to worry about me, I haven't had any appearances in a while and overdid it, I see I was wrong now.
Well, see you...
Shinpachi: Ah, Sacchan!

005
Gintoki: Hey, why are you guys staring at me like that? You got something to say?
Et tu, Sadaharu? You're the one who did it for God's sake.
GINTAMA
Lesson 318: Glasses are a part of the soul.
SORACHI HIDEAKI.
(Sign- Glasses of Edo.)
(Side text- Lenses are what make glasses, glasses!)
Sacchan: They’re all so good!
I simply can’t decide on one!!
It’s like I’m in a dream~
I just can't believe Gin-san is buying me glasses as a present.
Grandmama, thank you for breaking. Your death wasn't be in vain.
(Handwritten- Why do I gotta pay reparations for her glasses when she was the one who trespassed in my place...?)
Sacchan: Ooh, I just don't know which. Gin-san, you came all the way here, could you choose one for me?
Gintoki: Hey, how about those super SUPER cheap ones on the discount wagon there?

006
Sacchan: I can’t really see much with these on….
But if you like them Gin-san, that’s all that matters! How do I look?
Gintoki: Like a cute lil angel! They totally fit you too; like you were born to wear those glasses!
Sacchan: Reaally~?
I can’t even see my hand in front of my face, but I’ll get these!
Old guy: Excuse me, Sir?
Could you be looking for engagement glasses?
Gintoki:…And what the hell are engagement glasses? More like, haven’t I seen you before old fart?
Old guy: If she has her eyes on those glasses, sir, she must have quite an eye for quality. They have quite a history, you see.
You see, those lenses were left behind by Cao Cao when he was defeated in that Battle of Red Cliffs. You know the the murderous fire set aflame aboard the Wu's ships? These are the lenses that the old man who made the lenses worn by the old man who made the lenses worn by the old man who made those lenses looked at.
Gintoki: SO IN THE END THEY'RE JUST ANY OLD GLASSES?!!
Let’s think cheaper old man, cheaper.
Ah, those looks pretty good.
(Sfx- gacha *clack*)
Old guy: But those are mine…
Gintoki: These will do gramps. They are second-hand after all, so make 'em 99% off.
Old guy: Huh?! Wait!
Those glasses have a history to them! They belong to a Trojan defeated by the Trojan Horse's...

007
Sacchan: Tee-hee!
Th-thank you so much Gin-san, for these beautiful heart-quickening glasses.
I... Don't know what to say...... I've never had such a present... that's made me so happy...
(Sfx- Moji moji *fidget fidget*)
Gintoki: I’m sure that mannequin is overjoyed. But Gin-san is over here.
Sacchan: They're so nice. By the way, it seem like these don't quite match my prescription, so do you think you could take me home, Gin-san?
Today, I bid farewell to those things that only bound me to the past and my grandmother that scolded me.
Goodbye, glasses that were bought at auntie's daughter's shop who raised the dog whose poop Mom stepped in whom stepped on Dad who stepped on Grandmama's glasses.
Gintoki: THEN THEY'RE JUST UTTERLY ORDINARY GLASSES, AIN'T THEY?! YOU DECEIVED ME, DAMMIT!!
Sacchan: Thanks for the beautiful memories, Gin-san!
I'll.... never forget that you gave me these glasses, Gin-san, even for an instant!
I'll treasure them forever!
(Sfx- Zatsu zatsu *swff sff*)

008
(Sfx- Hah *sigh*)
Gintoki: Eh,
Whatever.
(Handwritten- They were basically free, anyway.)

009
No text, just Sacchan looks mighty cute in that outfit.
(Sign- HOTEL: Garden of Love.)
(TN- So I lied.)

010
Gintoki: PUT THE DAMN GLASSES ON ALREADY!!
(Sfx- Gotsu *TOK*)
Gintoki: What the hell are you using those glasses for?! And why did you take them into a love hotel?!
I thought you were going with that heartwarming pattern like with Kyuubee a few chapters ago, but now seriously, what the hell is going on?!
Sacchan: Oh no! Gin-san! Were you watching the whole time? Are you jealous of Peepers-san?
Gintoki: Who the hell is Peepers-san?! I just came to return your broken glasses, idiot!!
Sacchan: You've got it all wrong, Gin-san. I was planning to used Peepers-san soon, too, but the more I hang out with him, the more he becomes like a clone of you...
I feel so unworthy... and get nervous...
But I've finally built up my resolve, so... I'll take Peeper-san and... we... wea.... wear...
Ahh, I can’t say it! It’s still too embarrassing!
Gintoki: WHY'S PUTTING ON GLASSES SEEM DIRTY TO YOU?!
Sacchan: But to w... we... wear a second Gin-san isn't like that. It'd be like we're becoming one... KYAH!!
Gintoki: Just how momentous is putting on those glasses for you?
Just keep in mind, they wouldn’t be a clone of me, but the guy who uses them. Ergo, you’d be getting your groove on with the old dude who runs the shop.
Here, I got your old glasses fixed; if that accounts for anything.
So throw those dirty specs in the dumpster.
Okay? So next time you feel like breaking your glasses, don't come trespassing at my house to do it.


011
Sacchan: No!
Don't come waltzing back after all this time, acting like you're my boyfriend.
Those old glasses mean nothing to me anymore... They're just glasses.
They're not any good.
Because now I’m….I’m…
(Sfx- kacha *clack*)
Sacchan: With Peepers-san!!
(Sfx- Jakiiin *sheen*)
Sacchan: I don't have eyes for anyone other than Peepers-san!! It's him or nothing!
You bought Peepers-san for me Gin-san, and I’m sticking with him!
I can’t even fathom sporting another pair of glasses, ever!
I'm not some loose-eared woman who just thoughtlessly changes glasses when it's convenient for her!
Gintoki: What's a loose-eared woman?
All of the nonsense oozing out of your mouth about your glasses pissed me off so I got 'em fixed for you. So put 'em on already.
Besides, they don't match your prescription, so I would think that not being able to see would be a slight occupational hazard for you.
Sacchan: Leave me and Peepers-san alone!!
Don't try to be kind now, after so much has happened!!
Gintoki: What's with this conversation? Why's it starting to sound like a lover's spat?

012
Sacchan: Don't come near Peepers-san and I ever again!
Good bye old glasses!!
And farewell to you, my ex!!
(Sfx- Kiiii *reeeee*)
(Sfx- Gotsu *TOK*)
(Sfx- Pon *pat*)
(Sfx- Gashi *rub*)
(Sfx- Pan pan *pat pat*)
Shinpachi: How about we
go for drinks?
Gintoki: ......What's going on here?
Why do I feel like I just got dumped?
STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!! HAS THIS WHOLE FRIGGIN COUNTRY LOST IT’S FLIPPIN MIND?!

013
(Sfx- Futsu *fwap*)
Sacchan: Who’s the hit?
Guy: Government official. Yoneda Zenkichirou.
We have already sent shadows in to make preparations. We would like you to meet up with them and attack in a group.
In order to save a weak people... Can you get your hands dirty again, Sacchan?
Sacchan: There is some filth one must dirty themselves to clean.
If it means that I can save someone, I’ll gladly dye my hands blood red.
Guy: Sacchan, that isn’t a meat pie.
(Sfx- Bari bori *chew chew*)
(Sfx- Gahahahahah)
Yoneda: Echimoya, you’re one bad guy, you know that?
(Sfx- Gaga *tptp*)
Echimoya: No no, that honor is yours Yondeda-sama.
Yoneda: Come here, before we discuss what we came here for,
There's something I'd like to ask you, but---
(Sfx- Fun fun fun fun *tptptptp*)

014
Yoneda: Who is she?
Guards: Intruders!!
Cut them down and don't leave one left!!
Ninja: We’re surrounded! We’ll never get out of here alive!!
Sacchan: I’ll play decoy.
While they’re focused on me, you boys make a run for it.
Ninjas: But Sacchan!!
Sacchan: You just don’t get it, do you? As long as you’re here, I can’t go all out.
Now run for it! This is our only chance!!
(Sfx- Oooooooooh!!!)
(Sfx- Gotsu *Twhok*)
Ninja: He’s on our side, Sacchan.

015
Hattori: Sarutobi…
I hate to say it, but change the glasses.
It seems like you're on the verge of losing your place in the trade of assassination.
And with the repeated mistakes and even injuring your partner, there's no way around this.
There are lots of different rumors going around about a notorious assassin being in a slump. But my eyes can't be fooled...
You pretty much can't see a thing right now.
Sacchan: I can so see.
Hattori: Liar. If you can see, what am I doing in front of you right now?
Sacchan: Nothing, you’re just sitting there.
Hattori: Nope. Right in front of your face, I'm actually injecting some Borraginol into my...
(Sfx- Dosuuu *TOK*)

016
Hattori: T---that’s good….you’re still able to hit my weak spot, even though you can’t see anything. I knew you had the ability the whole time…
So it seems with your command of you other five senses has compensated for your eyes.
For a Ninja, eyes are equal to life.
The reason you became a member of the elite Oniwaban despite having bad eyes from the start is because of your natural talent and all the effort you put in are far greater.
But with the help of those glasses specially-made in Igo to help you, this can't be ignored.
Which brings me to ask you, why do you wear those glasses?
You should know best how naive it is to think that you can get around in this world with those eyes.
Sacchan: I—it’s none of your business…
What glasses I wear, and my eyes -whether they dry up or stop working, is none of your business.

017
Hattori: So you're fine with ending out all dried up?
Screw around too much, and you’re going to get killed.
The bosses of Edo's assassins are showing some unrest.
Your recent slump seems to have caused them to distrust you. I don't know if you can escape at this point.
Once you enter the the work of an assassin, you cannot leave. You know too much dangerous information.
If they lose trust in you, it’s game over.
They'll be headed to your place soon. That's how they deal with assassins who disobey laws.
{Anti-assasin assassination unit…}
{The punishers of annihilation!!!}
Sacchan: Punishment you say? What kind of punishment?
Like with whipes and candles doing all kinds of stuff there, or there, or doing one of those with THAT!
Hattori: I hate to burst your bubble, but I doubt it’s what you think It is.

018
Hattori: These guys are trained to kill those who are trained to kill.
So tell me,
Do you think you can beat them with those glasses?
Listen, just as you said, if you're interested in dying for someone you fell in love with,
then it's none of my business, but
if you die a worthless death, it would hurt our reputation with you being a former Oniwaban, and that sis IS my business.
We've got a dirty job to begin with, so I'm not saying you'd be giving us a bad name, but it would mean I would get less work.
Only a stupid death would bring that.

019
Sacchan: It was the first time..
The first time Gin-san…
ever gave me anything.
And now I…
can't even wear them.
(Sfx- Pota pota *drip drip*)
Sacchan: Snniffle..
Uuuh…
(Side text- In the end, her eyes aren’t the only things that are bad?!)
GINTAMA LESSON 318…………..END.