Hajimete No Aku 81

Dealing with net slang in my native language is hard enough. >_>

(Black box- The laid back fuzzy feeling Comedy!)

HAJIMETE NO AKU

Chapter 81: My first blog.

(Side text- It's a bit on the late side, but Jiro makes his debut on the web!!)

(Side text- The newest volume of the manga #6 is making huge waves! It's available everywhere!)

FUJIKI SHUN.

002

(Side text- It's finally here! ….what is 'it' this time though?)

(Sfx- Baaan)

Jiro: Whoa! Is this mine?

Kimura: Yeah, this PC's brand new!

Jiro: Now I have a PC of my own~.

Midoritani: Kimura-kun, you got this set together?

Kimura: You should be happy man. It's normally about 5 thousand yen for this.

(Sfx- Wai wai)

Kyouko: Oh?

Hey guys. What's the deal with the computer?

(Sfx- Ton ton tmtpm)

Kimura: Hey, Watari-san!

Midoritani: Good afternoon!

Jiro: You bore witness to what occurred at my abode this summer right?

Now the other villains have seen that I do have what it takes to lead a revival!

003

Jiro: Now, is there anything that I can do to assist you? Wait no, not here but there!

We’ll show those organizations with no more than flashy gimmicks that we mean business, with our own propaganda campaign!

Kyouko: Huh?

Kimura: It was my suggestion.

Kyouko: I see, so you bought a new computer?

Kimura: Yeah, the specs on this PC just weren’t cutting it.

Midoritani: Who knows, maybe he can use this computer for inventions.

Jiro: This new PC is incredible!

I can feel its life energy flowing into me!

Kimura: It’s used, dude.

(Sfx- furu furu *wibble wibble*)

(Sfx- Hah! *Gasp*)

2.0: Jiro-sama, are used goods like me worthless?

Jiro: 2.0?! Wait wait wait! I didn’t mean it that way! You’re a different matter completely!

Kyouko: Trouble in paradise, huh?

Kimura: All right, let’s get this baby connected!

004

Kimura: All right.

You should be okay now, it’s connecting to the net.

(Sfx- Kachi kachi *click click*)

Jiro: I’d expect no less from you, Kimura!

Kimura: Heh, I’m still in second place when compared to Morinaga-san.

Midoritani: Who?

Kimura: All right, give it a shot.

Jiro: All right!

(Sfx- Doki doki *throb throb*)

005
(Sfx- Kachi *click*)

Jiro: Ooh!

There seems to be a movie when I open this screen! Look at all of them!! Though what are they?

Kimura: Man, this brings back memories.

Midoritani: Back when you were a beginner?

Jiro: So how do we start the propaganda campaign?!

Kimura: Calm down there, buddy!

First off, research other sites.

Get an idea of their home page and layout.

By the way, what was her name again?

Jiro: Her?

Kimura: The vampire.

Jiro: Luna?

006

(Top- Dracula HP: Introductions page.//Box 1: Silvermoon- Dracula family head. I may be a little short, but I’m a third year! If you want to become one of my loyal followers, send me an e-mail right away!// Middling text- Even tonight I’m in your daydreams.// Butler Sebastian- Our leader is a little stupid, but she isn’t a bad girl. Please come by to visit.)

Jiro: Oh! This is Luna’s page!

Kimura: Bingo! See if you could find other organizations online!

Jiro: Hmm… There’s ‘Wolfmen, Cyborgs, Stretchy kids….the undead’ and so on…

Midoritani: All types…huh?

Wow…the rest of her blog is her stressing over taking difficult exams.

Jiro: Seems like she’s got it tough.

Kimura: Gotta remember to book mark this when I get home…

Jiro: I can only marvel at this computer’s ability to find people based on names….

How about I try ‘Midoritani’ next?

(Sfx- doki *Throb*)

Midoritani: WAIT A SECOND!!

(Sfx- Dosuuu *thok*)

Jiro: Ungh?!

007

(Sfx- Gokaaa *WHAM*)

Kimura: Akuno! Do it!!

Midoritani: Stop! I beg of you!!

(Sfx- Kata kata *click clack*)

(Sfx- Bata bata bata *fwissh fwissh fwissh*)

(Top text- Green Beret// The drifting poet Sir Midoritani’s poem blog!!// September’s poem….)

Jiro: Drifting poet Sir Midoritani?

….that’s you isn’t it?

Midoritani: Noooooooooo!!!

Kimura: The net is one scary place, aint it?

(Sfx- fuuu *siiigh*)

Kimura: But this isn’t the time to laugh at people’s embarrassing pages! We’ve got some propaganda to promote!

Jiro: Poet…

Midoritani: Uugh…

Kimura: I know you’re a newbie, so I’ll help you out. Hey Midoritani, let’s do this.

008

(Sfx- Deeen *tidal*)

(Screen- Kill them all recruiting page.// Number of visits.)

Midoritani: The blog has been created and uploaded to the web!

Jiro: Ooh…this is my blog…!

Midoritani: You just have to wait for people to show up!

Jiro: Before long, we will be rulers of the world!!

009

{One hour later…}

{Two hours later…}

Jiro: Not a single person! Are we truly connected to the web?

Midoritani: We are, just wait!

Kimura: Isn’t no one coming’ to a page like that.

Jiro: What was that?!

Kimura: You’re underestimating the web dude. If you don’t put something special up on your page, no one is gonna give it a second look!

The web is where people get information from sources far away!

First thing is first. You have to create something that catches the eye!

Look at this!

(Sfx- Kachi kachi *click click*)

010

(Screen- Step by step 365.)

(TN- Anyone who didn’t expect this should stop reading this series.)

Kimura: ‘Step by step 365’. I’m bringing together all the people who like to be tread upon by creating this site.

All those beautiful legs, are just one click away!

(Sfx- Gogogogogo *Rmmmmble*)

Kimura: And guess who got 2000 hits in one day?!
Midoritani: Awesome!!

My blog only got three hits in one day!!

Jiro: What?!

(Sfx- Baaan)

Kimura: Do you get it?! People all have interests!!

If you want hits, get some photos up there!!

And not just any pictures, but fan-service!!

(Sfx- Gasuuu *clicck*)

011

(Sfx- Katatatan *clackclackclack*)

(Screen- Kill them all//Bubble- Welcome)

Kimura: Something like this.

Jiro: You have one of those?!

Midoritani: Wow, it really does stand out now!

But can we really just use a picture without permission?

Jiro: Kyouko is sure to get angry and beat me senseless….

Kimura: FOOOLS!!

012

Kimura: THERES NO MEANING WITHOUT PROPAGANDA!!!

DO YOU WANT YOUR ORGANIZATION TO HIT THE BIG LEAGUES OR NOT?!

(Sfx- Zugannn *thooom.*)

(Handwritten- Scales.)

(Sfx- Sara sara sara *slsssssh*)

Jiro: You’re completely right Kimura…! I’m sorry for doubting you!

Kimura: As long as you understand.
Midoritani: You’re too simple Jiro-kun…

(Sfx- Gatsu *clench*)

Kimura: It’s no biggie, you can change the picture any time.

Once you get enough views, the layout doesn’t matter much anyway.

Midoritani: True enough.

Jiro: All right!

Now that I’ve decided that, instruct me on what else I should do!

Kimura: Leave it to me!

???: Put that picture there!

Oh, and an introduction page!

Let’s change that design..

(Sfx- Wai wai)

013

(Screen- Kill them all recruiting page.// Kyouko-san’s room.//Welcome! You’re my 00000001st slave.// Welcome to Kyouko’s room! For those who live drink and breathe me! I love games like baseball, and welcome you to my page!)

(TN- Dear god, it’s like a porno site now.)

Kimura: Sweet.

(Sfx- Gogogogogo *rmmmmmble*)

Jiro: This blog doesn’t seem to be for the organization any more…

Midoritani: Yeah, it’s more like a propaganda site for Watari-san…

014

Kimura: Fools! If you can’t handle this much…

(Sfx- Kacha *clack*)

Kyouko: Hey Jiro, its dinner time.

(Sfx- Dokiiii *throoob*)

Midoritani&Jiro: Whhhhhhhat?!

Kimura: Hey Watari-san.

Kyouko: Oh? It’s done? Let me see~.

Jiro: No! It’s still a long ways off!

Until its perfect, this blog is top secret!

Kyouko: Really?

Midoritani: You’d better change that quick, Jiro-kun.

Jiro: Yes, I’d wager that we should be fine for 2~3 days.

Kimura: Why? It’s an awesome fansite, isn’t it?

Midoritani: Could you stay out of this, Kimura-kun?

Well then, I guess I’ll be going!

Kimura: What? But we’re…

Jiro: Sorry! Thanks for telling us!!

015

Eiko: Oh? You’ve got a blog Jiro?

Dad: Advertising the organization with a blog huh? The times sure are changing!

Jiro: Well, I figure it would be a big help in bolstering our image.

Pochi: You’re quite the big shot Jiro. Now if only your sister would learn something from you.

Eiko: Such as?

(Sfx- Mogu mogu *chew chew*)

(Sfx- Hah hah hah)

2.0: If it’s propeganda you need, I can do that fine!

(Banner- Welcome to Kill them all.)

Kyouko: That’s cute, but unnecessary.

Let me know when it’s done though, I want to see it!

I want to see how good it is!

Dad: You could see it on a cellphone, right?

Kyouko: Probably?

Eiko: All right, I’ll get mine!

(Sfx- Wai wai)

Jiro: Not good…!

016

(Sfx- Dodododo *tmptmptmp*)

Jiro: If she sees that now…..

Her wrath will finish me for sure!!

(Sfx- Baannn *thud*)

(Screen- You are my 00346024th slave.)

Jiro: 30….thousand hits?

What?

(TN- sigh.)

(Handwritten- This site is incredible! Please step on me!(Oguri)//Kyouko-sama is awesome!(Min)// I want to be a slave too!(Burning)//Please come and step on me! Kyouko-sama, I’m all yours!!/(Bridge P)/ I want to be bad with you! Kyouko-samaaaaaa!! (Tokachi).)

017

Jiro: They’re all coming from Kimura’s site!!

Moreover….

He’s advertising this as Kyouko’s fansite!!

(Handwritten- He should be happy!)

Kimura: I’ll post the link,

On the forums too.
Jiro: Not good, I have to get this under control, fast..!

Um…

(Sfx- Kata kata kata *click click click)

{Greetings from the manager: J. This page is for Kill them all. Kyouko-san is simply one of our subordinates….}

{What are you talking about? This is Kyouko-sama’s holy grounds man.}

{Get with the program, manager!}

Jiro: They’re not listening to me!

(Sfx- Katatata *clickityklackity.)

Jiro: I’ll have to close it then! After that, making another should be easy!!

{You can’t erase this buddy!}

{I won’t let you take her from me, manager!}

{Don’t make me hack into your PC jerk!}

{More boobs!} (Side text- Kimura.)

{Put up more pictures of Kyouko-sama dammit!}

(Sfx- Bugoooo)

018

(Sfx- Kachi *clack*)

(Sfx- Iiiiii *reeeee*)

{Somehow, I was able to work things out …}

{Jiro’s brief peek at the net scared him straight.}

Kyouko: Lately, when I walk down the street people have been giving me weird looks…

(Handwritten- Is that Kyouko-sama?)

(Handwritten- No way!!)

Kyouko: And isn’t your blog finished yet?

{So much so, that he would never log on again.}

Jiro: N, No not yet!

(Side text- Everyone, don’t let the net control you~)

TO BE CONTINUED IN ISSUE 43.