Gintama 331

I'm back? O_o And yes I know I skipped a chapter. I really just didn't have the motivation to finish it. Other translators can jump in if they wish, or wait for me to get back to it eventually. Yes eventually. I have a life, and it's currently using my eyes to put out it's cigarettes. >_>

Hi wa mata noboru scans only, unless I specify otherwise.



001 (Color)
(Top text- The movie DVD sales date draws near!! To celebrate this event, we're going to have a 'movie DVD' color page!!!)

(Side text- Do you keep potato~es in winter... all to yourself?) [Potato~es in yellow]

GINTAMA

SORACHI HIDEAKI

(Bottom text- ☆Volumes 1~36 of the manga are on sale!
☆The anime 'Yorinuki Gintama-san' airs on TV Tokyo, every Monday at 6PM!
☆'Gintama the Movie' on DVD is sooner than you think! Grab your copy on December 15th!! For more details and news, check out the next page!!

001 (Black and White)

Lesson 331: Field Trips are Often Learning Experiences Even for Adults

001 a (The extra page)

●Appearing on the cover of Weekly Shounen Jump 2011 Issue 1

002

(Top Sign- Temple School)

(Lower Sign- In Session)

Teacher: ...And this is how here in the city of Edo...

is supported by many people doing all kinds of different jobs.

Board: Jobs

Teacher: In today's independent field trip, each of you will go see these occupations done with your own eyes to observe and study.

It is my hope that through this, you'll learn how people's jobs relate to society.

Any type of job is fine. Just research a career that interests you.

You'll also be setting up your won appointments as part of your studies.

Just make sure that whatever job you choose, you study it thoroughly.

With that, I wish you luck, everyone!

Students: Yes si~~~r!!

003

Somebody: What? A school field trip?

Kagura: Our friend Satsuki-chan from the temple school has to do it as homework.

They didn't give her any specific place to go, so she asked if she could observe the Yorozuya.

Gintoki: The hell, seriously? You mean starting today?

Don't just go taking on stupid responsibilities like that.

Gintoki: You made sure to charge a fair fee and stuff, right?

Kagura: We cannot take something like that from a child.

Gintoki: C'mon, field trips like this are the only way a kid his age is gonna learn about the hell that is society.

Shinpachi: Kagura-chan...

Maybe you'd be better off introducing them to some other workplace to follow...

I mean, anyhow, we don't even have a client here today.

Gintoki: There are none today, yesterday, or as far back as I can remember. We've got plenty of poverty to spare though.

Shinpachi: I really can't think it'll be good for kids with their hopes and dreams to come to this dark corner of society...

Kagura: You have to buck up!!

Do not embarrass me! We have gotta hit them with how cool the Yorozuya is!

'I want to become one of the Yorozuya when I grow up!' 'Me, too!' Does it not make your heart swell to hear the adoration of children for your work like that?

004

Gintoki: All kids have the same dreams, dammit. It's all about working at a bakery, a toy store or being a pilot.

Like hell if we're gonna let some kids who think they can open a cake shop and eat cake all day bite into the idiot ranking!

Kagura: Shinpachi, let us go get ingredients to make cake!

Shinpachi: You would've saved them time by just introducing them to a cake shop.

Kagura: No! I just want them to think 'Kagura-chan is so cool! She is part of the Yorozuya!'

(Sfx- Bata bata tpmtpm)

Kagura: You two pieces of shit must do something! I do not want to show them this kind of embarrassing Yorozuya!!

Gintoki: Hey, don't just nonchalantly pin us with stuff like that. How the heck am I embarrassing?

Shinpachi: Gin-san, there's a thing you should know about the world of kids...

I remember with a friend of mine on Parents Day at school. His mom showed up with one of the worst perms we had ever seen. It was more like a "punch" than a "perm".

It was so bad that the kids started calling him 'dempsy roll'.

(Handwritten- Hiro-kuuun)

Gintoki: When have I ever had a messed up perm like that? Mine's permanent, dammit!

Shinpachi: I mean something like having a bad perm. Like the current form of the Yorozuya. ["like" in the first sentence in bold.]

Kagura: Ah! They are here!

(Sfx- Pin ponn ding dong)

Kagura: Well, for now, you two just act more adult! Do not do anything strange! Do you understand?

Welcome Satsuki-chan!

Satsuki: I'm sorry for coming at such a busy time, Kagura-chan!

Hey, guys, let's all of us say hello to everyone at the Yorozuya!

(Handwritten- Hello, Yorozuya-san!)

005

Shinpachi: Hello, everyone.

Kagura: This is staff officer and head of our eastern forays, commanding officer Shimura.

Shinpachi: Eastern forays?! Commanding officer?!

Kagura: You will be quiet and follow my lead?

We just need to say stuff that will make us sound cool.

Kid: Ooh~ Commanding Officer of Eastern Forays! That sounds like hard work! ...Um, could you tell us what it is specifically that a Yorozuya does?

Shinpachi: Sure, let's go ask the president. Come on in, guys.

Kids: Please excuse us!

Shinpachi: Will this really be okay, Kagura-chan? We're basically making things up...

Kagura: President...

(Sfx- kon kon knock knock)

Kagura: The children I mentioned are here to observe our work, would it be okay if we came in?

(Sfx- Viiiiin whrrrrrr)

Gin: ............

006

{He...}

{He turned it into some kinda workshop...}

Shinpachi: Um... President?

Gintoki: Ugh, no good.

(Sfx- garan clatter)

Gintoki: The naked is totally not jacking in solidly.

(TN- He's using random English words "naked" and "solid" and "jack-in", and later "patriot" to sound technical.)

Shinpachi: Ah...

Um, Pres...

Gintoki: It's cold in here, could you hurry up and close that?

Otherwise the Patriot I took so long to warm will cool and harden.

Satsuki(?): Ah... Sorry!

(SFX- Garah)

Shinpachi: Um... What's that? What the heck is a Patriot?! But I guess it DOES sound like an artisan hard at work on a product, President.

Satsuki(?): U-Um, Yorozuya-san, we came to observe you at work.

Sorry if we're bothering you while you're working....

Gintoki: Are you guys more Calcutta fans or Mesogear fans?

Kids: ......Huh?

Gintoki: Did you guys come here because you're Calcutta fans or Mesogear fans? Don't tell me you don't understand that question.

(Sfx- Chira peer)

{I dunno! Don't ask me to bail you out! I'm pretty sure the president himself has no idea what a Calcutta fan and Mesogear fan are!!}

Satsuki: I'm a...... C... Calcutta fan...

Kid: Me too.

Kid(2): Me three.

{They just randomly picked one!! They just picked Calcutta!!}

007

Gintoki: Calcutta, huh?

Hmph, you sure are precocious for such little kids.

Here, you've gotta have Calcutta while it's hot.

Feel free to add your own milk and sugar. Drink up.

(Sfx- Koto tpt)

{THAT'S JUST REGULAR OLD COFFEE!!}

???: Th-Thanks a lot.

???: Wow! It's Calcutta!

So this is Calcutta?!

It's kinda like coffee.

{What Calcuttal!? So from the start, all you were had to ask was "Do you kids like coffee or not?", I can't help but get pissed off!!}

Gintoki: A long time ago when I was your age, I used to overreach myself and went with the Calcutta.

Though in my older days, I go with my natural choice, Mesogear... I think it's that bitter taste of the Mesogear going down my throat that made me the Mesogear-ish man I am today.

(Handwritten- Mesogear)

(Bottle- Strawberry Milk)

{This old man is just using technical sounding words and they're licking it up!! All in an "of course" sort of way!! Is he gonna try to get through this whole thing with that worker- like character?! }

Kid: Um, would it be okay if I asked now? Could you, uh, tell me what it is exactly that a Yorozuya-san does?

{They're here! The big core questions are being asked!!}

Gintoki: It's not very easy to explain it in a few words...

But the basics are that we're a secret organization that is involved in the manufacturing and sales of the patriot here.

{When you summarize it like that, it makes it sound like we're nothing more than a Patriot shop!! And what the hell's a Patriot anyway?!}

Gintoki: This Patri... er...

Patriot.

Kid: What exactly is a Patriot used for, sir?

{No matter what you try to make up, this thing's clearly not good for anything! It looks like independent research done by an elementary school kid!! What do we do now, President?!}

008

Gintoki: Hahah...what an interesting thing to ask...

(Handwritten- This is a masterpiece.)

Gintoki: The little one is asking what a Patriot is used for, Kagura-kun.

Kagura: It is certainly only things that would astound the imagination of a child, isn't it, President?

{For one reason or another, they're really pissing me off.}

Gintoki: Let me ask you kiddies a question then...

What are those things below your noses for?

Kid: Huh?

Gintoki: For some reason, humans all have those weird ditch things under their noses, right?

But for what reason is it there? How is it useful?

Kid: I---I don't know...

Gintoki: See?

....If I were to flat out explain the patriot, it would be...

Similar to that kind of thing.

{SO YOU DON'T KNOW EITHER!!}

Gintoki: Just like that ditch under your nose, the mike for the Famicom II controller, and the fact that somehow Sorachi Hideaki was in the Super Legends One-Shot Project,

This world is full of things people don't know why exist, things without without discernible meanings.

???: Dont' talk about the Gorilla that way!

Gintoki: However, with regards to humanity, beyond eating, shitting, and sleeping, all other things are essentially useless.

And we are no more than a group making just one more useless thing.

{You're talking all high and philosophical, but in the end you're just saying you made a piece of garbage, riiiight?!!}

(Bottom text- Konomi Naoshi- Moonwalker LTD
Sorachi Hideaki- Bankara-san Ga Tooru

SUPER LEGEND.)

009

Daigorou: So, the Yorozuya-san is a useless job that makes useless stuff then, right?

Gintoki: Huh?

It looks like you don't understand, little boy. What I said was

It means futile things that can be seen as useless are treasured in this world.

Daigorou: No, uh, I mean if you're making something that serves no purpose

then by extension, you, the Yorozuya-san that are making it, serve no purpose, right?

{Who is this kid?!}

Satsuki: Daigorou-kun, that's enough!

{He looks like a total idiot, but he's got an oddly clever straight man role going! Quit talking and just drink your Calcutta!!}

Daigorou: Satsuki-chan, can we end this field trip thing here?

We can just say that the Yorozuya-san serves no purpose as a company and does useless work.

Satsuki: Wait! Wait a second...

Kagura: The Patriot may seem useless,

but there are plenty of fun futile things it can do! It is an integrated media toy!

Daigorou: Really? Could you show us how to play with it?

Kagura: For example, if someone is pissing you off, you can use it as a whack-a-mole hammer.

Patriot Missile!

(Sfx- Gan gan gan THUNK THUNK THUNK)

{WE DON'T NEED A PATRIOT FOR THAAAAAT!!}

010

Kid: Reaaaly~? So that's the true form of the Patriot!!

Kid(2): Let me try it, too!!

Kid(3): Dude, this is AWESOME. I love the patriot! I want one too!

{That's not playing with a Patriot, that's just playing with Daigorou-kun, ain't it!?}

(Sfx- Gatsu thok)

Daigorou: I thought so..

The fact that there's actually crappy job like this where you make this kinda trash and try to pass it off as work....

really surprises me.

(Sfx- Kiiitsu glaaare)

{Daigorou-kun?! When he got smacked on the head he became a completely different person!!}

Daigorou: Satsuki, I'm outta here. I don't think there's any more I can study about these guys.

Satsuki: Daigorou-kun!

Gintoki: Wait a second kiddo, there's still more Calcutta left...

Daigorou: Sorry Prez, but I'm not into Mesogear or Calcutta....

I'm more of a Bourbon fan.

{HE'S SO DAMNED HARD BOILED NOW!! ARE YOU SERIOUSLY A KID THAT GOES TO TEMPLE SCHOOL?!}

Daigorou: That was a real pain in the ass field trip.

I'm gonna study real hard to get a good job so I don't end up as adults like you.

Thanks for showing me where the bottom rung of society is, Yorozuya-san....

011

(Sfx- Shuh)

Shinpachi: Hey, cheer up~.

(Sfx- Hara hara flutter)

Shinpachi: Gin-san.

Those kids only talked bad about you because they didn't get to see us in action.

You should've have been making a Patriot in the first place.

I'm sure if they got to see us working for real, they'd be speechless.

Kagura: It is so, Gin-chan!

Forget that one shitty brat, the other kids said they had fun.

Even though the Patriot looks like something you found on the street...

Gintoki: I worked so hard on this thing dammit, and some snot nosed brat blows me out of the water...

Though they threw out all the souvenir Patriots they took with them on their way home.

Gin: Even so... I built this job up from nothing and relatively speaking, I liked doing it.

But seeing it from that kid's perspective... I think he's right. What are we doing? Do we know? Is this really a crap job?

Shinpachi: No! That's not so at all!!

Gintoki: I wonder if the Jump readers always thought that, too...

Like 'what the hell does this guy actually do?'...

Shinpachi: It'll be fine! I'm sure the feeling in your soul get through to everyone!!

Gintoki: Then answer me this....what the hell does is this thing used for?

Shinpachi: ..........

012

Gintoki: You don't know!

Guess what?! I DON'T EITHER!!

(Sfx- Geragera cackle cackle)

Gintoki: It's just one of those things, in the end! With somebody not knowing what they're doing themselves, so like hell other people are gonna know!

I'm the same as this piece of junk!! The Yorozuya is nothing but garbage!!

It's all just pointless work that contributes nothing to society! GEREGERAGERA!

(Sfx- Hyahahahahah)

Shinpachi: He's totally cracked. It must've been a big shock.

I guess it's because the words of kids surprisingly feel like they have a lot of truth to them.

Hm? Hey... Look!

Isn't that Hijikata-san?

Kagura: Oh, you are right.

Shinpachi: So some of the kids went to the Shinsengumi for their field trip, too, huh?

Hijikata: So basically, I patrol the city like this, usually watching out to see if there are any bad people doing crimes.

That's essentially the duty of us police, understand?

Kids: Sir!

Hijikata: Yes? What is it?

Kid: When you say "bad people", could you more concretely describe what kind of person that is exactly?

Hijikata: People who are committing acts that violate the law.

Kid: Okay! So then the laws are an absolute good?

Hijikata: Laws are rules put in place so people don't cause trouble for one another and can live safely. To break them is a crime.

013

Kid: Do you understand my question! I am asking if laws are good or evil!!

Hijikata: Y... You can basically think of them as good.

Kid: In that case, I would like to ask you this! It not allowed for someone to go down to the train tracks from a train station platform,

therefore in the case of where someone falls down their because they're drunk, if someone were to break the rules and go down there to help them would be evil!! And a person who would stand their and watch them get hit by a train and die would be good?!!

Shinpachi: Kinda... seems like there're some annoying kids over there, too.

Hijikata: We handle those on a case by case basis...

Kid: I think that a law that changes based on the situation doesn't really function as a law at all.

By being judged with a system as unreliable as that, even criminals would not put up with it.

(Sfx- Piku poit)

Hijikata: Maybe I didn't say it exactly right. People who cause trouble for or bother other people. These are bad people. The laws don't matter so much.

Shinpachi: He just threw out law completely! He just felt explaining it was too much of a pain, and chucked law out completely!

[The first syllable of his name is in the circle]

Kid: In that case, by you blowing secondhand cigarette smoke around, wouldn't that make you a criminal, too, Hijikata-san?!!

Hijikata: I'm SO sorry sir! Watch me as I put it out!! See? See? Can you forgive me now?!

(Sfx- Jyuuuuu sssssssssssssst)

Shinpachi: Oh man, this is bad! He's about to snap! He's about to become a REAL criminal!

Kid: So where's the barrier between bothering and crimes? If you cannot give a concrete example, we have no way to take measures against committing them!

For example, over there, a man is being relentlessly beaten up by an annoyed-looking lady.

Who's the criminal in that situation!?

014

Hijikata: Uh, I was pretty much kidding about everything I said up till now, kids. Actually, being a police officer means...

producing and selling this patriot to the masses.

Shinpachi: HE JUST THREW OUT EVERYTHING AND BECAME A PATIOT SHOP OWNER!!

MORE LIKE, WHY DOES HIJIKATA-SAN HAVE A PATRIOT TOO?! WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY?! ARE THEY SOME SORT OF WEIRD FAD?!

Kid: Woah, what an asshole. The minute things look bad for him he changes careers.

I guess what they say about the police in Japan being rotten nowadays is true.

We don't need 'em anyway. You'll be a ton safer protecting yourself in society rather than relying on police.

It's really a crap job, ain't it? Police officer...

(Sfx- Garrara shffffft)

Shinpachi: Hijikata-san is broken, too, huh...

Kagura: I wonder if that is how you use a Patriot?

Tsukuyo: Could ya gimme a break?

Shinpachi: !

Don't ya think yer bein' a little hasty, saying that?

015

Shinpachi: Th-That's Tsukuyo-san!

Wait, the kids are gonna go all the way to Yoshiwara to do this field trip?!

Boy: Pleaaase miss?! We would like so much to study the work of the women of the night at Yoshiwara!

You can let us go to Yoshiwara~?

Shinpachi: Geez! Every one of these kids are totally perverted! What the hell kind of field trip are they planning?! Their eyes totally creep me out.

Tsukuyo: Like I'm sayin, you kids are a hundred years too early to be goin' to Yoshiwara.

Once you've been around the block a bit more, you should show your faces again.

Shinpachi: Yes! Exactly! Do you wanna get Jump banned or something?!!

Obviously Sacchan: Ma'am!

Then could you at least teach us the arts of beating a man into writing pleasure?

Shinpachi: You know, that pervert with the glasses is really familiar! How'd she get mixed in with those kids?!

Tsukuyo: No... Like I'm sayin', last thing I'd ever be telling ya.

Besides that, I ain't a call call girl, I'm a guard.

Sacchan: You see, I have this boyfriend right now, if one of those sorts of things happened and then something went wrong, would you take responsibility for it?

Shinpachi: That ain't gonna happen! Just how far into your fantasy world have you gone into?! You're already living a completely different life!

Tsukuyo: Mm... I guess if it were after problem'd already happen it'd be too late...

Ah, I guess if it's for the future and that stuff, ain't a problem in teachin' ya just a little...

016

Tsukyo: Ok, lemme explain. If this is doing that, then you use this for that here...

(Sfx- Gararara sffffft)

Shinpachi: WHAT THE HELL IS SHE USING THAT PATRIOT FOOOOOR?!!

Kids: THAT'S THE KINDA THING YOU USE A PATRIOT FOOOOR?!!

U... UWAA! What the hell is it anyway?!

SCAAARY! Are all girls gonna end up as things like that?!!

(Sfx- Gyaaaaaah!!)

(Sfx-Shuutsu shfft)

Shinpachi: Hey... Just how many fields is the Patriot spreading to?

(Handwritten- I just thought I'd use an easy-to-understand method in a way they wouldn't understand...)

(Handwritten- Don't try to act like a naive little girl!

Forget them, just tell me Yoshiwara's secrets!!)

Kagura: The patriot can be used for that, can it? I would expect no less from Tsukky. She is so mature, yes?

Kondo: Well, it's like this.

Our job isn't something that starts off really well.

But still, we don't bend, we just keep on trying and believe in tomorrow.

That is the credo of of the career of stalker.

(SFX- Heeeeh)

Shinpachi: THAT IS NOT A JOOOOOOOOB!!

017

Shinpachi: WHY ARE THOSE KIDS HAVING A FIELD TRIP TO LEARN ABOUT STALKERS?! WHAT CAN THEY POSSIBLY HOPE TO LEARN!?

Kid: Sir?

Kondo: Yes, what is it?

Kid: Doesn't this occupation just make you want to die sometimes?

Shinpachi: WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?!

Kondo: What a good question!

Shinpachi: THERE IS NOTHING GOOD ABOUT IT! HE WAS JUST THINKING IF YOU'D BE BETTER OFF DEAD!

Kondo: Sure, in any line of work, whatever it may be, it can be really painful, even to the point that death seems to be the only way out, for anyone.

But anyhow, if you are in pain, you want to feel pain doing what you love. That's what I believe, and I think everyone spends their lives wanting to find that job that's worth risking life and limb for.

Shinpachi: HOW THE HELL IS HE TELLING THAT WHILE PUTTING ON A PROFESSIONAL FACE?! DO YOU FREAKING UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE RECOMMENDING TO THESE KIDS?!

???: That's a naive way of thinking, pal.

If everyone only tried to do work that they liked, then society would fall apart.

Tons of people do jobs they'd never want to be doing. Those are the kind of people that hold up society.

Even me... EVEN I'M NOT PATRIOTING ALL DAY BECAUSE I LIKE TO!!

Shinpachi: HE'S FUSED WITH THE PATRIOOOOOOT!!!

018

Shinpachi: HEEEEEY WHAT'S GOING OOOOON?!! WHAT DOES "PATRIOTING" MEAN?!

I CAN'T EVEN TELL WHAT THE CONCEPT OF A PATRIOT IS AT THIS POINT! I HAVE NO IDEA AT ALL!!

Hasegawa: But.... But what choice do I have? If I don't Patriot, who will?!!

Somebody's gotta do it! In this world... Patriots are a necessity!

Shinpachi: THEY ARE ABSOLUTELY NOT!! AND ANYONE CAN DO SOME IDIOTIC WORK LIKE THAT!!

Kondo: People who do things for some arbitrary reason like that may be able to stay standing, but they never grab on to anything.

You can still do things you like while Patrioting.

Hasegawa: Y...You don't understand how a Patriot feels!!

Kondo: Yes, I do.

Because I.... I'm A PATRIOT AND A STALKER! AND I LIVE MY LIFE WORKING THAT DOUBLE JOB!!

Shinpachi: YOU TOOOOOOOO?!!

A Patriot who's a stalker on the side? WHY?! JUST...WHY?! The bottom line is you're both just failures as humans!!

Hasegawa: Y... You, too?

Kondo: Yeah, you're not the only patriot around here, my friend. You're not alone.

Hasegawa: For now on, you can talk with me, free of all burdens.

Kondo: And when you're out there chasing your dreams, I'll fill in Patrioting for you.

Hasegawa: Th...

Thank you...

(Sfx- GASH)

019

Kid: Um...excuse me...

I have a question..

I've been wondering this whole time...

what is a Patriot?

Both: Dunno.

(Sfx- Kaaa Kawwww)

Shinpachi: Just what was that...

Everyone?

020

Shinpachi: Haven't every single one of you big adults get utterly humiliated by kids?

(Sfx- Zuuuuun drooop)

Shinpachi: You didn't teach them the value, difficulty, magnificence, or anything about a job, did you?!!

Kondo: As long as we know that, isn't it enough?

Shinpachi: YOURS ISN'T EVEN REALLY A JOB, DAMMIT!!

Your jobs aren't just things to earn a paycheck from...

the job of an adult is also to teach important things to children.

...Are you okay with this?

At this rate, this is all gonna be over with the adults completely losing to the kids.

Are you okay with that?

With their field trips ending like this...?

(Sfx- Gauuuu awoooo)

Mom: Daigorou...

While you were out, a letter came addressed to you. I left it on your desk.

Daigorou: ...A letter?

(Sfx- Kasaa fwp)

Daigorou: Patriot Factory....

An invitation for an field trip? What is this...?

(On card- Patriot Factory Observational Field Trip
Invitation Card)

(Side text- An investigation of the world's weirdest company!!)

GINTAMA LESSON 331..............END