Gintama 357

I'm sooo tired. But this chapter was sooo epic. Only Sorachi could have Gundam and Star Wars work so well together that it stops making sense and begins making GAR.



{I remember you bastards!!}

{I had thought you were suspicious but....}

(Bottom text- The Kabukichou Shitenou arc is awesome!! The TV Anime is on every Monday night at 6pm!! And you can only catch it on TV Tokyo!!)

(Side text- Infiltration!!)

GINTAMA

{But Samurai?!}

{Why the hell are you Samurai people in space?!}

(Side text- A speciall announcement! This summer is Gintama X Hotsprings?! From July 19th to the 31st, the stage will be and Ooedo hot spring story! 'Ooedo Gintama land in Ooedo hotspring story will open up! For more info, just keep reading Jump!!)

Sakamoto: You guys didn't finish your homework didya?

Earth Samurai are still alive and kickin'!!

Gintoki: Lame. You amanto already forgot the name of your natural enemies?

The name of the dudes who took one sword,

And protected a country, friends,

And our very souls...

from jerkasses like you!!

002

Sakamoto: We're the patriots,

Sakamoto Tatsuma,

Gintoki: And Sakata Gintoki.

COME AT US BRAAAH!!

(Sfx- Kuaaaaaaaaaah roaaaaaaaar)

(Side text- To the battlefield!!!)

GINTAMA
LESSON 357: A Senryouhako is just a trash bin.
(TN- Senryouhako are like money boxes, or piggy banks.)

SORACHI HIDEAKI.

Gintoki: It's a one night revival ceremony, bastaaaaaaards!!!

(Sfx- Oraaaaaaaaaaah!!)

Gintoki: Tatsumaaaa! Show these guys that you're still in the game!!

Sakamoto: Oh hell yeah!! I'm gonna raise some hell, believe me dude!!

(Sfx- Kwaaaah roaaar)

Sakamoto: Sup yall! I'm Sakamoto Tatsuma! I'm the one man backup for the Joi patriots! Pleased to meet ya!!

003

Sakamoto: And you must be one of those Double Dragon guys I've heard of right? Are you the right dragon? Or the left?

{Right Dragon.}

Sakamoto: Well hot damn! Right is one hell of a job. During competitions, it's up to the dude doing right to have to figure out crap like the wind direction and ball trajectory right? Hard work, right?

Awwright, let's have a seat right here, and talk about it.

Gintoki: WHAT THE FREAK ARE YOU DOOOING?!

Sakamoto: Gahahahah! You got your way of raisn' hell, and I've got mine! Don't worry dude, I got this handled!!

Gintoki: What are you handling?! From my point of view I'm the only one raising anything!!

{What are you scheming...?}

Sakamoto: Between you and me brah, I'm not even here to protect the earth. All that stuff was just me showin' off.

See, what I'm really here to do is start makin some deals. My buddies don't even know bout it!

{A deal?}

Sakamoto: See here's the thing. If I had to list my address it'd be up here in space. Somethin so wide and endless is just awesome to me. Why should I get all comfy on that dingy little planet?

{It was your people that came into our stronghold hoping to sell Earth to us, was it not?}
Sakamoto: Oh you mean the little lady I got with me? Yeah, she's not tha best at handlin' business deals yet. As soon as things are about to go sour, she turns tail. I still got some work to do on her.

But she got me the info I needed....cause now I know what to pitch to you guys.

Ya'll want somethin' that's gonna make takin over tha planet nice and simple like right?

A weapon that's user-friendly, even more so than yer white demons are. And I think I can sell you that.

004

Sakamoto: I ain't got a white demon for you, but a white monster!!

See I've even gone and tweaked his color settings just for you! Look at that whitness? Like fallen snow brah!

Gintoki: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

(Handwritten- Imma kill ya for real!)

Sakamoto: But hold the phones folks! If you by the white monster from me, I'll even give ya the action figure for adults, 'Exploding weapon Zura!', and Afromania as an extra!

You'd better buy 'em before they're gone!

(Sfx- Gyahhhhh!!!)

(Sfx- Wara wara wara sdssh sddsh sddsh)

{Quit screwing with us.}

Sakamoto: There's no such thing as 'kidding' when yer tryin' to sell your buddies.

All right, you all can try before ya buy, dig?

Send your best white demons against my white monster.

(Sfx- Doh dosu dokaa thud thud twak)

Sakamoto: Dude doesn't give a flyin' crap...

About something little like a planet.

005

Sakamoto: If his friends are in trouble...

Dude'll knock a planet out of orbit.

He's a real monster.

(Sfx- Dosha doshiaaa bloors blisssh)

Sakamoto: I hear a planet slowly fallin' out of orbit..

Dude, I'm serious. He'll really do it if you don't act now.

{You seriously want us to believe that somoene who'd attack our ship would then turn and lend us a hand in domination?!}

(Sfx- Jyakkki shaaack)

Sakamoto: No jokes.

Go on, fight him. See how many of you boys get yer asses handed to ya.

If you've got any spare planets lyin around, us Earth-folk will gladly take 'em off yer hands.

A Planet ain't nothin but a shell.

People are tha difference between a 'planet' and a 'world'.

If you want Senryouhako, I’ll give ya as many as you want.

It's what's in 'em that's got me interested.

Doesn't really matter if what's in em ain't gold...

if it's just an old steel ball....

006

Sakamoto: It's that worthless trash...

That sparkles brightest.

(Sfx- Kuwaaaaaaaah roaaaaaar)

{Patriots?!}

{The data we gathered had nothing of the sort!}

{Search for those rats..}

{And drop each and every one of them into space!}

{Lord Vader!}

{Behind you!!}

Shinpachi: Wh---

What's that?

{What....}

{Is that...}

007

Shinpachi: The earth...

Look at it....

{A smile?}

(Sfx- Zaaaah dsssssh)

{Wh—what's with this rain...?}

{It's suddenly so warm...}

Dude: Huh?

Your face....

Wait, you're talking!

It's for real! Our voices and faces have returned!!

008

Dude: A blessed rain from the heavens!!

(Sfx- Kuaaaah!!!)

{God hasn't forsaken us!! Rejoiceeeee!!!}

Hanano: For those at home, please have a look!

Everyone is returning to normal!!

{L—Lord Vader!}

{Th—This is...!!}

Shinpachi: Th--
The cloud...

The cloud over Earth has started to disappear!

It's disappearing!

009

{To our home world and friends...from the universe with love.}

{It appears our invaders were no mere mice.}

(Sfx- Zufoooo fwooosh)

010

(Sfx- Dooooon fwoooosh)

Katsura: Th---

That's....!!

{This was your plot...}

{I didn't plot anything.}

{By the way, the portrait on the Earth? Not the work of spies or Generals or the Renhou.}

011

Elizabeth: This Elizabeth poster board....

Is the first and last with no lies.

Katsura: E....

ELIZABETHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

(Sfx- Doogoooooooooh THOOOOOOOOOM)

012

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmmble)

Shinpachi: Woah!!

Someone, not us -but someone is starting a rebellion!!

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmmble)
Shinpachi: Who is it?

Fumiko: I can only think of one man who would have changed the seeds planted...

During his stay on earth....

{Shogun Eren...}

{Has rebelled?!}

Shinpachi: That exploding Gunsam earlier was probably him too.

{Launch a Gunsam fleet and destroy the traitors!!}

Fumiko: He was the one who programmed them to explode...

{Look at that!}

Fumiko: And then took control of the fleet that he had singlehandedly sabotaged.

{To all my beloved comrades. This is my last order as your Shogun. Evacuate quickly from here....do not throw away your lives in meaningless conflict.}

{Shogun Eren.}

013

(Sfx- Dogooooo booom)

(Sfx- Doooon thooom)

{Our Gunsams!!}

Fumiko: I knew it...he planned this from the start.

{You damn traitor!!}

Fumiko: He played the traitor in order to get back to this ship and stop the Renhou forces from seizing Earth.

By instilling fear into the Renhou who loved Earth...

He kept them from rebelling and throwing themselves into harms way.

{Quick, to the remaining units!}

Fumiko: All this to concoct a scheme that would allow him to oppose Vader,

And to protect his friends both on Earth and among the Renhou..
He chose a path...

that would betray them both.

014

{I see...}

{So your ascent into the Shogun rank was for this...}

{To derail my plans and destroy me.}

{Eren... Did you really believe for a second...}

(Sfx- Beki beki Crackle crackle)

{That this would be enough to stop me?}

Vader: DID YOU THINK...

THAT A PEON COULD CHANGE THE WORLD?!

(SFX- Gahhhh Gahhh kasheeeeeeeeen)

015

(Sfx- Dodoooon thoooom)

(Sfx- Gogogogogo rmmmmmble)

Vader: Whether it be the Earth's fate,

Or the fate of the Renbou...

You have the power to change NOTHING.

(Sfx- Guooooooooh roaaaaaaar)

Vader: Trying to take the two of us out together? You've picked up some strange earth customs.

(Sfx- Gafunnnnn thoooook)

Vader: Pathetic! Don't make me laugh.

016

(Sfx- Gigigigi rnnnnd)

Vader: Eren, I find your lack of sense disturbing, and for that you will die alone.

All because you wanted to use betrayal to protect what you loved.
Vader: You decided to throw away both...

the earth and renhou.

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmble)

Vader: Now in the vastness that is the galaxy....

You are without a single ally.

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmmble)

Vader: There isn't a soul here that will laud your efforts, nor will there be proof that you changed anything.

You will die a lonely and miserable death!!

(Sfx- Dohhh fwoooom)

(Sfx- Dogoooooon thoooooooom)

(Sfx- Doooon thoooom)

(Sfx- Gogogogogogo rmmmmmble)

017

(Sfx- Zubooooh wfooosh)

(Sfx- Gashiiii grnnnnd)

Vader: Eren, you bastard.....!

(Sfx- Gogogogogo rmmmmble)

(Sfx- Nyahhh grnnn)

(Sfx- Dooon thoom)

(Sfx- Dofuuoooo fwhoooom)

Elizabeth: Vader...

You're absolutely right.

I lied to my friends, and myself.

I eventually forgot who I was supposed to be.

(Sfx- Dodododododododo boomboomboomboom)

Elizabeth: But now, all is well.

Even if I lose sight of my home world, or my identity...

018

{I am content...}

{Knowing that I died as Katsura-san's friend....}

(Sfx- Mishi mishi grnnd grinnd)

(Sfx- Meki mekiii grrd grrd)

Vader: THEN DIE!!

(Sfx- Kyuuiiiii veeeeeen)

Vader: ALONE HERE IN SPACE WHERE NOT A SINGLE FRIEND WILL FIND YOU!!

(Sfx- Dobuushhhi dshhhhhhhhh)

019

Katsura: If it's a friend you need, there's one right here.

Despite the darkness....

Or even the vast nothingness that is this galaxy...

(Sfx- Zubaaaaaaaaaah bloooooorsh)

Katsura: I as your friend...

Will always have your back, just as I said!!

(Side text- A friend has arrived!!)

GINTAMA LESSON 357..................END.