Gintama 365

I realize that I have a bunch of projects that I start but don't finish. Most of that you can blame on this series, and chapters like this. Even my computer's lagging at the amount of text that went into the wordfile I saved with this thing. Good lord.



(Side text- A man decides his own worth.)

(TN- The big red text on the wall confuses me. It looks like it could read 'Baragaki for a lifetime' but I don't know what Baragaki means. The side umbrella thing is one of those Blank x Blank things. In this case it's Otae x Kondo. And on the other side 'Hijikata die' is written.)

(Red box- The TV anime airs on TV Tokyo Mondays at 6! The second DVD for the anime hits stores on Wednesday! For more details, check out the next page!!)

(Yellow box- A center color page to celebrate the anime!!)

GINTAMA
SORACHI HIDEAKI

002

(Side text- Special scoop! From 10/28 to 10/30 there will be a special event in Ikeburo! Sunshine city D hall will sponsor a special Gintama world body sensation event! For more details, keep reading after this week's Jump chapter!)

Lesson 365: Check it out!

(Sfx- Kuchaaa clack)

???: Sasaki Tetsunosuke?

Yeah, the shogunate vassals have been turning up in huge numbers apparently. This kid's the one from the Sasaki house.

However he's no more than a bad little brat with no interest in pursuing any sort of ideals. That's why they sent him to us to scare him straight.

Okita: So basically his folks got sick of him, and dumped him on our shoulders then?

Hijikata: Kondo-san, this isn't a daycare for godssakes.

If someone's gonna dump this kids, why not on some patrolmen or something like that?

(Handwritten- Damn I'm bored...I can't wait till I can go home.)

Okita: That's the elites for you. They musta figured if there's a possibility for him to be a great cop, he should come here. Well I can't fault the Sasaki or whatevers for thinking that way.

Well, if you guys really want to train him, how about we set him on the front lines of my first unit.

I'm sure a guy like him can at least die in the line of duty without screwing up.

Kondo: If something happens to him, I’m sure the higher ups will have a lot to say.

Hijikata: Then he can be a gopher or something. Maybe clean some toilets?

Kondo: That's a no-go too.

003

Kondo: Oh by the way, talking about gophers....

Seems like the vassal asked for you specifically Toshi.

Tetu: 'Sup.

I'm Tetu.

(Sfx- Cha cha munch munch)

Tetu: You're um....Hijikata-san, right?

Listen, ain't no need to be callin me by my govt name, ya dig?

I just want to join the patriot hunting team, got it?

'Cause you know, I'm pretty boss when it comes to fighting.

So can I just be the leader, dude?

To be honest, I don't even like havin' people lower than me have to do that whole bowing thing. Against my policy, ya feel me?

Status don't mean nothin man. When we're born there ain't nothin like enemies or friends, so why we gotta get all up in arms for little crap like that?

(Sfx- Kucha kucha kucha chew chew chew)

Tetu: I start talkin, and people start laughin...I just dont' get it. What's the matter with them? Daaag. If they don't get it straight soon they're gonna lose control.

Well, ain't no big thing. Let's do this brah!

We dawgs right? TOSHI? Hell yeah!

(Sfx- Kucha kucha chew chew)

(Sfx- Kuii draww)

004

Hijikata: HELL YEAAAAAAAAAAH!!

(Sfx- Dogoooohh thoooom)

Tetu: Gyaaaaaah!!

Hijikata: When you're trying to introduce yourself to someone, do you always make incessant chewing noises, ya little sow?

(Sfx- Bushiiii blooooorssh)

(Sfx- Hi-hiiiiii eeeeeeek)

Hijkata: I haven't seen such a gourmet like you since Oishinbo volume 17!! You love chewing your gluten don't you, jackass?!

(TN- Oishinbo is a manga about gourmet eating that has run in Big comic spirits since 1983.)

Hijikata: And then, what the fuck is up with your loose pants? You couldn't find the right size so you just made do with anything?

(Sfx- Zubahhh blooorsh)

(Sfx- Bicha blissh)

Tetu: GYAHHHHH!!

Hijikata: There ya go, now they fit perfectly! Great huh!

Listen punkass. You come to our house, and follow OUR rules got it?

Idiot brats like you that can't follow the samurai code should find a sword and get their seppuku on, ya dig?!

I don't give a SHIT about who your dad or anyone is!!

Come ooooooon!! You ready?! If you wanna see your pops, how about we send your head flying?!

005

(Sfx- Gotnnn tunk)

Hijikata: Hell yeah, 'sup Tetu.

Tetu: Hell yeah. With this, me and you are dawgs for life, dig?

Awwight dog. If you get in a fight, just holla at your man. I'll be right up to give ya some help. Ya dig?

(Sfx- Gan gan gan thunk thunk thunk)

Hijikata: Yeah, I dig.
{If you really want to get rid of him, then we have to make it clear there's no place for him here. It may mean you'll have to turn a blind eye to certain things.}

{If you take it nice and easy and talk to him, you can probably get your point across.}

{Nice and easy...?}

(Sfx- Kata kata kata shiver shiver)

{How long am I going to have to put up with this crap? Am I going to really have to learn how to deal with this kid? I don't know how long I can take it...}

Yamazaki: Vice captian, do we really have a vassal now?

That's awesome. You've always talked about how busy you ware...

006

Yamazaki: So where is he?

Hijikata: Doing distribution.

(Sfx- Zucha zucha duun duuun)

(Sfx- Zunchaaa douuun)

Yamazaki: Why is that the only area that has a New york style to it?

Uh, do you think I could get some curry over here?

(Sfx- Gonyo gonyo whisper whisper)

Yamazaki: Um...what are you doing?

(Sfx- Baaan)

Dude: HEY HEY HEY

Yamazaki: What?! I don't have anything!! I don't have anything!! I don't even have rice!!

Dude: HEY.

(Sfx- Pero lick)

Yamazaki: Why the heck does this seem like a drug deal with the Yakuza?!

Tetu: CHERRY BOY.

Yamazaki: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A CHERRY BOY!? Morover how did you understand from doing just that?!

(Sfx- Goso goso rustle rustle)

Yamazaki: Wait!! What are you putting in there?! I don't want it!! Hey stop!

007

Yamazaki: THAT'S THE CUURRRRRY!!

(Sfx- Dorori droop)

Yamazaki: GAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

(Sfx- Pan pan tp tp)

Kondo: No, no no!!

How many times do I have to tell you! This isn't about just swinging a sword around!

You have to put your whole body into swinging the sword!

This is the sword arts group, right?!

Still your breath, and then cut with one decisive swing!!

This isn't a sport, nor is it a thing to play around with! Little movements are....

(Sfx- Goh thok)

(Handwritten- Hey pass it!)

(Sfx- Hey! Pass here!)

008

Kondo: Let me repeat! This isn---

(Sfx- Goh thok)

(Handwritten- Hey hey Gori!)

(Handwritten- Pass it Gori!!)

Kondo: I'll say it one last time!!

use your left hand...

And dunk 'em!!

(Handwritten- Nice shot!)

(Handwritten- Sweeet!)

(Handwritten- It's all good~!!)

(Sfx- Zuncha zuncha zuncha doom doom doom)

Hijikata: Hey Tetu, do you think you could turn this down a lil?

(Sfx- Zuncha zunca doom doom)

Tetu: What's up dude? I can't hear you!

Hijikata: That's why you need to turn this down, dammit!

Tetu: Oh awwright TOSHI! You like this beat and tha lyrics too right?

(Sfx- Zuncha zuncha ddom doom)

009

Hijikata: No, TOSHI actually really can't stand hip hop.

(Sfx- Geiiii sfft)

Tetu: Shiiiit! Toshi, dude what are you doing?!

Hijikata: Hey Tetsu...

How long are you going to keep this bullshit up?

You should know full well that you don't belong here.

And this is your last chance.

You know more than anyone that there's no way you'll be accepted into society like this.

Tetu: Shiiit. I'm tired of hearing this lame old stuff.

You ain't gonna tell me that you lived by the rules TOSHI. I'm my own man. I wanna live like that.

Hijikata: Idiots that just run around destroying any wall they come up against aren't going to get anywhere.

The reason for that is the wall known as 'society' ain't going anywhere, and it ain't gonna change. You're not going to be able to go any further unless you do the changing.

In order to live there are plenty of walls you're gonna need to get through.
But that's how everyone in society gets around. You're not special or anything, and you'd better learn about the almighty compromise.

The sooner you do, the faster you'll be able to progress.

That's the true meaning being able to live the way that you want.

Right now all you're doing is shutting your ears to the truth, but that is in fact builiding a wall around yourself.

You're just being a brat.

010

Hijikata: If you don't want to get left behind, you should stay here.

Even if you're wet behind the ears, there's a chance you'll be forgiven.

However on our battlefield, being left behind means...

certain death.

All you're gonna do is be a drag to us if you keep hanging around.

I don't want to see you get cut down.

Someone who isn't on the path of the samurai, willing to commit seppuku is still a wet behind the ears brat.

We however, know that this is a possibility for us. Knowing this we can still move forward.

Tetu: Fine, I'll be cut down..

I wanna be like you bro!

I don't fit in with the Shinsengumi or at home!

I'm just a lifetime screwup!!

And if that's the case, I'm just gonna do whatever the hell I wanna!

(Sfx- Guiii wweee)

Tetu: Until I die!!

(Sfx- Zuzunnnn dooonn)

(Sfx- Zuun zuun zunn doon doon doon)

Tetu: I don't give a crap what anyone has to say! YO HEEEEEY!!

011

Hijikata: Hey! Stop that dammit! Stop the car!!

(Sfx- Bububunn dunn dun dunnn)

(Sfx- Zunzuunnn dudndonnn)

Tetu: Sup homey? You got a problem? If not, why you lookin over here?!

(Sfx- Zun zun zun zun doom doom doom)

Hijikata: Stop that, dammit!

Tetu: If you got somethin' to say, say it! But be careful, we da po-po! And we don't mess around, Hell yeaaaaaaah!!

Gintoki: W—What? Huh?

Hijikata: This is bad Tetsu! He's bad news, seriously! The walls you've dealt with up until now are nothing compared to his shitty corroding wall!

(Sfx- Zushii Ssssh)

Tetu: We the po-po yo! Listen up! We gonna put ya in the slamma'!

Gintoki: Yeah I couldn't really hear much except the slammer thing.

(Sfx- Zunn doom)

Tetu: Hell yeah!!

Gintoki: Hell no?

Tetu: I SAID HELL YEAH!

Hijikata: That part of the sentence really doesn't matter dammit!!

Gintoki: I can't really hear you. Let's turn that down.

Tetsu: FUUUUUUUUUCK!!!

(Sfx- Goooh thoook)

Gintoki: Dude, did you just say fuck?

Who the fuck are you talking to, bitch?

(Sfx- Gan gan gan thokk thook thokk)

012

Dudes: Fucking Jap!!

Fucking crazy monkey!!

Gintoki: Who the hell is a fashion leader?!

(Sfx- Gagoooh thooom)

Gintoki: Yeah I do set the trends in fashion, bitchasses!!

Hijikata: You don't understand them at all!! No one said anything like that!

Morover, can you people please knock it off?! You can't do this in the middle of the street!

Tetu: Shut the fuck up! I can't let this motherfukin' perm head get away with dissin' me!

Gintoki: Who the hell are you calling fashion perm?! I know it's pretty fuckin' stylish, but still!!

Tetu: Lets settle this mano a mano, dig? No one disses Tetu twice and walks in this city fresh! We gonna have a rap beef right here!!

YOYO Where da hell you from homie?

Hijikata: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON NOW?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET?!

Tetu: Black boat, silver float, island boat, Akabane? Nope. You know somethin' bout my pants, I hope.

(TN- Akabane is a train station in Japan.)

(Handwritten- FU~!!)

(Sfx- Pan pan whap whap)

Hijikata: What the hell does FU mean?! More like, the last part was just you wondering where you lost your pants right?!

Gintoki: FU~

(Sfx- Paaaaan THOOOOK)

Hijikata: WHY'D YOU SAY 'FU' TOO?! IS THAT THE NAME OF YOUR ATTACK OR SOMETHING?! ARE YOU GUYS FIGHTING?!

013
Gintoki: YO-YO I don't know you from no one see?

You don't know me, Chris, Fifi Mori or Kawai~.

Hijikata: Why the hell are you beefing with each other?! More like you're talking about not knowing him, by using a bunch of people we don't know either!!

Gintoki: As for your pants dude, don't ask me. You mighta dropped them in the pool or in the sea. FUCKING!!

(Sfx- Fuuun fwooof)

Hijikata: SO YOU HAD THEM!?

(Sfx- Goooaaah thooook)

(Handwritten- What the hell are you doing?!)

(Sfx- Pan pan pat pat)

Dudes: FU~~!!

Hijikata: WHY ARE YOU GUYS HAPPY?! HE ISN'T YOUR FRIEND!!

Chris: FUUUU~

(Sfx- Paaaan THUUUD)

Hijikata: SOME RANDOM DUDE JUST FUUU~'ED HIS WAY INTO THIS!

Tetu: Uugh...

Damn, I lost bros...

Hijikata: Who are you talking to?! You didn't just include me right?!

Tetu: Me and you...we gotta do a collaboration someday ….

014

Gintoki: What?

Why?

(Sfx- Goshaaaah craaaaaaaash)

Tetu: B---

BROOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!!
015

(Sfx- Bata bata clatter clatter)

People: Seize him!

3:40 pm....arrest made for obstruction of justice.

(Sfx- Gacha clack)

Hijikata: Wha....?

Y—you guys are...!!

???: I suppose we did overstep our bounds in our assistance...

Our deepest apologies. We had no intention on stepping on the Shinsengumi's toes.

I don't want you going around resenting us...it was just so hard to stay quiet...

I'm actually a big fan of the Shinsengumi.

Hijikata: Those uniforms...

No way, it couldn't be...

???: It is actually quite an honor to protect Edo...

With the man feared as the demon vice captain....

016

???: Oh, sorry. I forgot to address you properly as a Shinsengumi member.

I'm the vice captian of the Mimawarigumi.....Sasaki Isaburou.

Hijikata: Mimawarigumi?!

Sasaki: These uniforms were modeled after yours...

In this say and age, authors play favoritism to the color white...

But I actually am a big fan of the Shinsengumi. So I can understand quite well.

Here, I'll exchange my number with you, so we can text each other.

(Sfx- Pi ph beep beep.)

Sasaki: And I'll copy yours in my phone....and record it as Toshi-nyan.
{My cellphone....!}

Hijikata: Y—you bastaaard!!

(Sfx- Poii fwiiip)

Sasaki: Oh, many apologies...I was simply trying to be friendly, since it appears you don't have too many.

But I do apologize for misunderstanding. I just have to repeat again that I'm a huge fan of the Shinsengumi's.

017

Sasaki: Your existence in and of itself is nothing short of a miracle.

After all, you were born as nothing more than poor folk with no real talent...

But now with everyone's strength you're able to protect Edo...somehow.

Your tale is rather moving and impressive. To think that so much...gutter snipe could gather and become something other than what goes out with the burnables...

In fact, if I recall...you were nothing but leftovers from the Sasaki house from the very beginning...leftovers with no real use or meaning..

But it seems that it's within your ranks that a useless little brother has managed to find a place to scurry to.

Hijikata: Tetsu...you...

Sasaki: Oh, and regarding the Shinsengumi's towards those who break the law and harakiri....

Please don't hold back for the Sasaki's...

Go ahead and...

Cut him.

There isn't a single reason why a fool who does nothing but besmirch our name to live.

So do as you wish.

018

Sasaki: I'll delete you from my address book...

lets see...oh! Here we are 'illegitimate child'.

(Sfx- Pishiii crackle)

(Sfx- Bakaaan crash)

Hijikata: Sorry about that...

Guess you can't erase my address yet, huh?

Hijikata: I've already got you down in my address book as little miss honor student.

Tetu: Toshi...

Hijikata: If you must keep me around, put me in the folder marked...

Baragaki. It's the only folder that fits me.

(Side text- An explosive situation!!)

(TN- Baragaki seems to be a nick name the real Hijikata had. I'm still not sure what it means though, but it's also the name of a book written about the Shinsengumi.)

GINTAMA LESSON 365...........END.