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Translations: Gintama 683 by kewl0210 , One Piece 904 by cnet128

Gintama 381

Presents should be sent early.

+ posted by Bomber D Rufi as translation on Dec 9, 2011 05:19 | Go to Gintama

-> RTS Page for Gintama 381

Oh sure Sorachi. Go back to being a text dumpster. See if I care. Hmph.

Hi wa mata noboru only.

(Side text- It's that time of the season....)


{Today is the coldest day of the year, isn't it?}

Ana: Everyone, be sure to put on your warmest clothes before going out, so you don't get sick right before Christmas!

???: Okay!!

Ana: Well then, be sure to go off today in good spirits~!

Gintoki: Sure thing!!

Kagura: Hurry up and find some work, Putarou.

Shinpachi: Gin-san, do you think it's possible to act a little less embarrassing this early in the morning? Watching you fool around is painful.

Gintoki: If it's Ketsuno Ana asking, I can't ignore it.

Kagura: You have been like this since that onmyouji incident.

Talking to Ketsuno Ana through the television set as if she notices you.

Sure you say she is smiling for you and you alone, but is that the truth?


Shinpachi: Um, that just makes you a fanboy doesn't it?

You sound just like a stalker.

Gintoki: What the hell are you talking about? I can't help it if she likes smiling at me.

Kagura: You are an idiot. You should find some work. Stop ogling that announcer lady.

Announcers and the such are like the acquaintances of baseball players. In fact if they really wanted to, they could become J leagers.

Moreso than even the athletes, they are chasing after a ball with all their might.

They are not interested in dirty *alls like Gin-chan's.

Gintoki: Nuh-uh!!! Ketsuno Ana is different than them! She's the Ana within Ana! She's the Ana that drops within Rondalka's cave, ya asswipe!!

(TN- Rondalka's cave is a location in Dragonquest II.)
Ana: Now for today's Black fortunetelling.

Ooh, seems like you libras are in the spotlight!

You're the lucky ones today!

Especially permheads with dopey faces who are brushing their teeth at this current moment!

Gintoki: See?! She's totally talking about me! She's dead on!!

Ana: You'll be the recipients of a really amazing present today, so look forward to it~

Gintoki: S—seriously? A present?! Could it be a...a...Love letter?!

Ana: By the way, your lucky item would be something that's bright red...

Gintoki: Bright red! Got it!


Gedomaru: A metal rod.

(Sfx- Gofuhhh thooonk)

(Sfx- Dodon ccrasssh)

Shinpachi: Y---


(Sfx- Gatagata clatter clatter)

(Handwritten- upsy daisy.)

Gedomaru: It's been a while, Gintoki-sama.

Shinpachi: Gedomaru-san!!


Lesson 381: Presents should be sent early.

(Side text- Gedomaru returns after a long hiatus!)


Shinpachi: Um..so you need....

A splendid gift for yourself?
Gedomaru: I don't need a present or anything like that. I'm just returning here.

Don't you recall me saying that you're my second master, Gintoki-sama?

It makes perfect sense for me to return home occasionally, right?

(Sfx- Pori pori chew chew)

Gedomaru: So feel free to kick back and relax. My house is your house.

Gintoki: Yeah, uh...I'm fairly sure the people who live here are the ones with rights those lines.

Gedomaru: Oh? Were you people in the middle of breakfast?

Sorry about that, I didn't mean to interrupt chowtime or anything like that.

Then, with out reservations lets eat~


(Sfx- Ngahh mnyaaah)

Gintoki: Why the hell are you here?!

What splendid present are you talking about?! Do you think we're the post office?!

Okay, master's orders. Get yer ass back in the TV and back where you belong!!


Gedomaru: Fine then, if you could just sign here, and afterward you'll be hearing from my lawyer.

(Sfx- Suhh wfft)

(Note- Shikigami divorce decree. Gedomaru//Sakata Gintoki.)

Gedomaru: As for the consolation money, I'd think two million will do. After all being a newly divorced Shikigami means having to deal with all sorts of trouble.

Gintoki: And why the hell does that look suspiciously like a divorce agreement? Is this some kind of Shikigami prenup scam?!

Gedomaru: It's a real shame. I came over because I wanted to make Christel-sama happy.

(Sfx- Gararara claaater)

Gedomaru: Oooooh wellll~ If you're not going to help, maybe I should suggest to Christel-sama that she should fall madly in love with some other guy~

Gintoki: H—Hold on!

Wwait, what did you say?!

Wait a moment miss!!

Master, wait for me~!!

???: Huuuh?

A Christmas Present?!

Gedomaru: That's it, yes.

The truth is, us Shikigami decided that we want to get our masters a present to express our gratitude.

Shinpachi: Shikigami?! Do they have anything to do with religion?!

More like, shouldn't monsters who look THAT evil be sorta anti-Christmas?!


Gedomaru: Seeing that my specialty as a Shikigami is the art of kicking ass,

I'm not sure what kind of present I would get Christel-sama that would make her happy.

And so..

Gintoki: Ah, I get it.

You figured that a player like Gin-san would be able to give you advice on what to buy?

Shinpachi: Gedomaru-san, don't listen to him. He's really only a playboy under the belt.

Gintoki: Whatever. So not knowing what to get her, you decided in the end to get our help huh?

Gedomaru: You know, Gintoki-sama you could find a present and give it to Christel-sama too.

Gintoki: So that's how it is huh?! All your good for is thinking of low down stuff ain't you? Well leave it to me.

Kagura: You know on second thought. You two are quite cute.

Gedomaru: It's the principal of Jaian's movie version. One day of suffering for 364 days of asswhupping? I think it works out.

Shinpachi: Your noble reason is rotting into something lowdown though...

Well whatever! Let's pick something post haste!
I wonder what I should buy for sister?

(Sfx- Dath dash)

Kagura: Ah! That is not fair! I and Gin-chan will need to go first, please!

Look there, it's a Santa festival!

Shinpachi: I'm sure we can find something great there, Gedomaru-san!!

(Sign- Santa festival!)

Shinpachi: Hey! What are you doing there Gin-san? Let's go!

(Sfx- Kyahahahah)

(Sfx- Ufufufufu)

Shinpachi: C'mon...!


(Sfx- Zunn dooom)

(Sfx- Zzuun dooom)

(Sfx- Zuun doom)

Gedomaru: Is anything the matter?

You two.

Shinpachi: I um...


I'm fairly sure we were headed towards a Santa festival...

And sure even after the page was flipped it's still sort of a Santa festival...


Shinpachi: ….

Oooh~ I read the sign wrong! Silly me.

(Sign- SATAN festival.)


(Sfx- Gaaah graaab)


It's like a damn monster mash here!!

All the things that go bump in the night are running rampant here, aren't they?!

Gedomaru: I guess my strong youki wavelength caused the barrier to break and the door to the other side to open.

Directly parallel to your coordinate axis, exists this world which is having a Santa festival simultaneously with yours. We are now in the world of the spirits, Makai.

Shinpachi: Smells like the set up for a different manga.

Gintoki: Pattsan, look at those simple bastards, confusing Halloween for Christmas.

(Sfx- Pupuh snicker snicker)

(Sfx- Pan pan pat pat)

Shinpachi: No, WE'RE the mistaken ones. This is happening for real!

Somehow we got lost and ended up in a Satan festival rather than a Santa one..

Gintoki: This ain't the time to be looking for presents then!!


Kagura: It does not matter. They are the same. It is like the kanji for Okiwara and Hagiwara.

Shinpachi: Too bad they're totally different!

(TN- One means 'reedy field', while the other is 'silver grass field.' I'm pretty sure it's a celebrity joke, but I don't get it.)

(Handwritten- Ah I want to eat a Mino.)

(Sign- Minotaur grill.)

Gintoki: Whether its Satan or Santa, whether they give people dreams or despair, in the end everyone's getting something right?

Shinpachi: They're NOT! And you're dead wrong if you think someone will forgive you for that!

Gedomaru: As expected of Gintoki-sama, he'll make a perfect demon king.

Shinpachi: Is this the time to be impressed?! Are we going to be able to leave?! Are we going to be okay?!

Gedomaru: In reality this world exists as a mirror to yours. In your land, demons have begun to rise...

Along with that Satan guy who in one go had already taken this world...

Shinpachi: Stoooopppit!! Leave that kind of story to Jump SQ!!

Gedomaru: In any case, we might be able to find something here that fits the bill.

Shinpachi: I'm under the impression that Christmas presents in the Makai would lack a certain -very necessary delicacy....

Gedomaru: We need something that will shine whether it's in the light or the darkness.

Shinpachi: Speaking of darkness, I can't help but think that your insides and our future are looking really dark about now.

Kagura: Hey, Gedomaru!!

How about something like that?

We will give this to Ketsuno Ana.



Kagura: But it is a cross, yes?

Shinpachi: It's a cross, but something really unbelievable is attached to it!!

Gedomaru: That is not a mere cross. It's Frankenfort. He's a charm against evil spirits.

Shinpachi: What the blue hell is Frankenfort?! And he looks like he'd draw in evil spirits rather than warding them off!!

Gedomaru: Hmm, may I give it a shot?

Store owner(?): Go right ahead.

(Sfx- Gohh thooom)

Gedomaru: That's no good. It should be able a hit from me better than that. Next?

Shinpachi: What kind of test was that?!

(Sfx- Para para clatter clatter)

Gintoki: Hey Gedomaru....

How about this?

Ketsuno Ana might need it.


(TN- Ketsu no Ana means asshole, for those of you that didn't read the corresponding arc.)

Shinpachi: Christmas is officially missing in action around here!!

Gintoki: Ass cleanliness leads to face cleanliness.

Shinpachi: What kind of Christmas is that?!

Oni: Sir, this will take care of god excrement, washing it clean off, and send it flying. It's also a shower toilet bath.

Shinpachi: How long are we going to stand around talking about assholes?!

Gedomaru: Hold on. Maybe I should test it first.

Shinpachi: Please don't. Just don't do anything Gedomaru-san!!


(Sfx- Goshaaaah doooom)

Gedomaru: Next.

Shinpachi: Why must you test things like that?!

Gintoki: At this rate we're never going to find anything for Ketsuno Ana.

Shinpachi: I really think she'd be better off forgetting any of those presents.

How can you guys even still remember it's the Christmas season?!

Gintoki: You know what I think Pattsan? You could do less yapping and more present finding.

Shinpachi: I've got my hands full doing the straight man routine here.

Kagura: Shinpachi. In countries where there is no straight man act, you will be known as simply..

That annoying glasses person in Gintama, yes?


Kagura: If this displeases you, try to do something other than be the straight man.

Shinpachi: You make it sound so easy, but in the makai, I...

(Sfx- Don bump)

Shinpachi: Ah, sorry!

{Crap, It feels like I may have accidentally kissed this person...}

Gedomaru: What are you doing Shinpachi?

Those are on sale.

Kagura: Ugh, they are creepy.

Gintoki: I feel like I've seen 'em before though.





{No way...}



(Sfx- Dooon thooom)


Gedomaru: I was trying to talk to you and then you get all wibbly and flip out. It was pissing me off..


Give her baaaaaack!! I want my Pandemonium-san baaaaaaaaack!!

Gedomaru: Excuse me, could you give me Pandimonium-san, please?

You guys are all probably starving aren't you?


(Sfx- Gefuhh burrp)

(Handwritten- They really ate her in front of me...and I couldn't do anything...)

Gedomaru: I guess it really isn't easy to find presents is it?


Gedomaru: I had no idea that it was this difficult to find someone a present.

I'm a shikigami after all and not a human...I'm probably a hundred years off of being able to convincingly mimic you guys and your ways.

Kagura: Hey now. Get a grip. You said you want to be like the movie Jaian right?

A present will have meaning. Even if the person getting it is pathetic.

Gintoki: Are you cheering her up or putting her down?

All right, lets change gears for a minute.

Why not find something you'd like?

Gedomaru: Hm?

Gintoki: You've been trying to find a present that you figure would make her happy, but that ain't working out, obviously.

So why not find something that you want? It's the thought that counts at any rate.

Gedomaru: But I'm not too sure what Cristel-sama's interests are...

Gintoki: Just choose already.

Gedomaru: Then...

How about this?

Kagura: It is a hair ornament, yes?

Shinpachi: Wait, aren't you just putting someone's skulls on your skull?


Gintoki: Would YOU want something like that?

Gedomaru: Well...

I mean, if it were Cristel-sama who gave it to me...

I would be overjoyed with anything.

(Sfx- Geragera Snicker snicker)

Gintoki: I see.

Yo pops, gimme that thing.

Shinpachi: Hold on, Gin-san...

Gintoki: I want two.

Oh yeah, do me a favor and knock a few digits from the price, mmmkay?

Make sure you give it to her properly.

And wear 'em as a pair.

Demon: Sorry bub.

Can't sell that to ya.

See, we have a strict no sales to humans policy here.

But it's yer lucky day. Cause if it's bones you want...

(Sfx- Hyagaaaah dssssssh)

Demon: I can rip yours out!

(Sfx- Garraan clatter)


(Sfx- Barabara clatter clatter)

Demons: Gahahahahah!! Well hot damn! Some humans wandered here!! Ain't that something!

Let's rip 'em up and sell them!

I want the arm.

Lemmie get a head!

Leave me the nails.

(Sfx- Dodooon fwooooosh)

(Sfx- Bara bara clatter)

(Sfx- Gahh graab)

(Sfx- Zuboooh fwhooof)

Gedomaru: Oooh, lookie what I got for free~



Demons: Oh shi—there's a Japanese demon up in here! And she's a monster!! Shit just got real!!

She's gotta be Demon king class!!

Dammit, lets go get Satan-sama! We ain't gonna let some Japanese demon call the shots! It's time to go to war!!

Shinpachi: Gedomaru...

Gedomaru: I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have dragged you guys here.

But maybe this turned out for the best after all.

I managed to learn something important.


Humans give each other gifts.

Honestly I thought it would be a pain in the ass,

But it turned out to be pretty fun.

Next time I'll choose a present on my own.

I dunno what it'll be or how to choose it,

But the main point is that I have to do it...or there won't be any meaning.


Gedomaru: Gintoki-sama...

I think I’m the one who ended up receiving a splendid present today.

Later guys.

(Sfx- Fuhhh fwffff)

Shinpachi: Wait...

Hold on...

Demons: Hey!! There they are Satan-sama!!

Shinpachi: COME BACK FOR US!!!!

{It's the coldest day of the year today everyone!}

{These cold days will only continue...}

{So be sure not to get sick!}


Ana: Don't get too complacent just because Christmas is almost here!

Everyone, be sure to put on your warmest clothes before going out, so you don't get sick right before the holidays!

Ana: Well then, be sure to go off today in good spirits~!

So looong~!

(Sfx- Buekushhii aaachooo!)

All: Oookay~!!

(Sfx- Bueekushuun aaachooo!)

(Side text- Those feelings resounded loud and clear!)

GINTAMA LESSON 381.............END.

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#1. by hakuoni ()
Posted on Dec 11, 2011
Hello, Thank you for your hard work on the Gintama series. I'm sorry for asking this :( , but I was wondering if you had already translated Gintama 371 because it is not up online? and others had asked about it but there was no reply. so i thought you may have dropped it or something.
Level [D] Translator

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