Gintama 484

Never have I wanted to be stuck in one pose for a long ass time more than while translating this chapter. Of course the pose I'd choose is one where my hands are around a certain Gorilla's neck and squeezing tightly.



Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
(Side text- It’d be really surprising if the rent for the month before last was paid.)
GINTAMA
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!

002
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Gintoki: Um, Granny?
See, you really don’t have to repeat it for me to get what you mean okay?
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Gintoki: Hey uh…Granny? How many times are you going to say it?
Otose: Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Gintoki: At this rate I ain’t gonna have any kidneys left….
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Gintoki: Helloooo? Are you home in there Granny?
I’m sorry. Listen. I promise to have my rent and my kidneys next month so how about we just stop this?
Otose: Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Gintoki: KNOCK THIS SHIT OFF OLD BAG!! IT’S GETTING ON MY NERVES!!
How long are you gonna pollute this panel with your nasty face huuuh?! Think about the people looking at the page for a minute wouldya?! Seeing your face for three panels in a row is more than what normal people can handle!!
Otose: Even if you have to sell a kidney or your ears I want this month and last month’s rent on the double!!!
Otose: I’ve said this more than once you rotten perm…
Gintoki: OLD BAT!! CAN YOU NOT HEAR ME SAYING THAT YOU’RE ANNOY—
(Sfx- Gurari *wffft*)
(Sfx- Pariiin *Crash*)

003
(Cut off text- Just once//Rotten perm.)
(Broken bubble- This month and last month’s rent)
(Piece of bubble- Rent.)
Gintoki: Th—this is…
(Sfx- Dobo dobo *tp top*)
Gintoki: Pattsan…
Kagura!!
(Sfx- Dobo dobo *tip tp*)
Shinpachi: ….Gin-san..
Kagura: It is just as I figured, yes?

004
Shinpachi: Everyone…
Seems to be unable to move…
The people in the city…no, in the entirety of Edo seem to be stuck.
Kagura: Not just the people, nope.
Animals, things…
Everyone and everything is not moving, yes?
Gintoki: So basically what are you trying to tell me…?
Things have stopped…?
Not just people and things but…
Time itself….?
(Side text- If it were you, what would you do?)
GINTAMA
Lesson 484: Awesome situations never stop during a brief pause.
SORACHI HIDEAKI

005
Gintoki: It’s so quiet…
It’s almost as if there’s no one left in the world…
It’s actually perfect…
I get that things are crazy and such, but it’s exactly because we have times like this that people need to learn to chill.
It’s when you chill out that you can put situations in order.
For example…like..
In a situation like this, not paying the rent is totally cool.
Shinpachi: THIS ISN’T THE TIME TO SAY STUFF LIKE THAAAT!!
Gintoki: I should also note that with this your payday isn’t coming for all of eternity.
Kagura: Is this a shady organization!? Our time has not stopped, yes?!
Gintoki: You guys might as well have stopped. I mean my water and heating have completely ceased to function.
Shinpachi: And that has nothing to do with our current time situation! That’s your fault!!
Moreover is this the time to be talking about stuff like that?!
The time of the world has stopped working!! We’re the only ones here who haven’t stopped!!
How did things end up this way!?
Gintoki: I have no idea really, but..
(Sfx- Gosohh *shfft*)

006
Gintoki: I got this sorta rare looking clock thingy.
Since things are the way they are I was gonna throw this thing in the trash real fast…
Shinpachi: Huh? What’s the deal with that thing?
Kagura: Gin-chan? What is that?
Gintoki: It looks weird but I guess it’s some sorta clock.
(Handwritten- I was thinking of pawning it for some cash though.)
Gintoki: I was plastered so I don’t quite remember everything..
But it was when I was heading home after drinking…
It was that vacant lot between the 3rd and 4th district…
I think it was dropped there so I picked it up.
Shinpachi: MORE LIKE SOMETHING PRETTY INCREDIBLE FELL AND IS LYING ON IT’S SIDE THERE!!

007
{This clock existed 10 million years in the world of Mt. Sumeru and is used to control the time there. It is a clock from the age of the gods.}
{We ‘Time guardians’ have continued to protect the existence of time through the ages. In order to keep the peace however, we have strived to keep this out of the hands of people. For should a human gain access to it then without a doubt misfortune and calamity would fall upon the time of the universe.}
{I beg of you….take this clock to a place human hands will not grasp it and seal it away.}
(SFX- Oeeehhhh *Blllooooorgh*)
Shinpachi: HE’S NOT LISTENING TO THE MOST IMPORTANT PART!! PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF THE UNIVERSE DON’T GIVE IT TO HIIIIIIIIIIM!!!
{Uuugh….I feel like shit…}
{My head is killing me…}
{I can’t sleep…}
{And it’s already morning… And I didn’t get a wink of sleep.}
(Sfx- Jiriririrriri *riiiiiiiiiing*)
{SHUT UUUUUUPPPP!!! I AIN’T GETTING UUUUUUUUUP!!!}
{IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT THIS HAPPENED ISN’T IIIIIIIIIIIT?!}

008
Shinpachi: WHAT WERE YOU DOOOING?!
YOU WERE GIVEN SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT TO TAK CARE OF AND YOU ACCIDENTLY WOKE UP AND BROKE IT?!
Kagura: So in short that idiot was entrusted with this clock by other idiots. They ask him to take care of it and we end up in this situation?
Shinpachi: It’s hard to swallow this so suddenly…
That this clock could stop all time in the entire universe…but if it did stop everything then…
I suppose we weren’t affected because we were near the clock at the time it was broken.
(Sfx- Gashaaaan *Craaaaaash*)
Gintoki: SHADDUP!!
Shinpachi: I wonder if it’s because only those around the user are affected by the clock’s abilities?
Basically then as long as this clock remains unfixed….
The time of this world will remain halted…
And the three of us will live in a timeline different from the world…
Left on our own for eternity?
Shinpachi: WHAT ARE WE GONNA DOOOO!?
We can’t ask others for help since they’ve all been halted…
And we have no way to do anything ourselves!! The world and by extension us is finished!!

009
Gintoki: Pattsan, calm yourself. Nothing positive is born from negativity.
True samurai are upbeat no matter what’s thrown at them. It’s when you look at things positively that you can find a means to get out of problems.
Shinpachi: THIS COMING FROM THE SAMURAI WHO DOOMED THE WORLD IN THE FIRST PLACE!! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY STUFF LIKE THAT!!
Gintoki: Sure at this rate the world is gonna be halted for all of eternity, but how about we change that into a positive and put it this way?
Now you have the convenience of eternity to grope Otsuu-chan’s boobs.
Shinpachi: WHAT WAY OUT ARE YOU SUGGESTING?!
Gintoki: See in a worst case scenario, you can grope her for 3 million years and think of what to do after that. You’d be able to go for it any time you’re feeling down.
Shinpachi: Groping boobs for 3 million years wouldn’t be depressing, just painful!! They’d probably fall off after that!!
More like, who could calmly perform lewd acts in a situation like this?!
All I need is three hours.
Gintoki: Okay. You hit up yours while I tap some fine Ketsuno Ana as—
(Sfx- Datsh *Dash*)
(Sfx- Kacharii *clack*)
(Sfx- Dooooon *fwoooom*)
Kagura: I will become time guardian. I will not let you two vermin do as you please, no.
Rather than be lazy you will take an empty can to the window of a bank and become thieves, uhuh.
Gintoki: W—wait Kagura. I mighta ended up getting us here without thinking but…
(Sfx- Para para *clatter*)

010
Kagura(?): Grandpa Gengai’s place?
Are you dumb?
It is true that he can fix almost anything, yes…
But right now he’s been stuck in a stupid pose. He is frozen picking his nose. He cannot do anything for us like this, yes?
Since we are the only ones who have not had our time halted, we cannot expect assistance from anyone, nope.
Gintoki: Right. No matter what we do time won’t move forward.
There’s no real need for it to go forward anyway.
In short if we can’t get time to actively move forward…
Then we’ll give it a strong push and jump into a future scene.
(Left to right: Future//Current time.)
Gintoki: And it’s there…
Kagura: I understand Gin-chan!
Gintoki: If we entrust the clock to the old dude of the present…
And leave him a note explaining what we want him to do.
Then we force the needle on the clock forward…
Kagura: Then we can see a future where Gramps has fixed the clock! And the world will have returned to normal!!
Amazing Gin-chan! I did not know there is such a way to use a time machine!

011
Gintoki: And while we’re waiting for the stopped time to continue let me draft up some documents..
(Paper- Marriage registry// Husband: Sakata Gintoki// Ketsuno Ana)
Gintoki: I’ll be waiting on a future where I can ****** Ketsuno Ana’s ass to my hearts content.
Ana: (X’d out): Today’s weather. (Handwritten) Today’s husband.
Gintoki: Awwright, turn the needle.
Shinpachi: It’s about the ass with you isn’t iiiiitt!!
(Handwritten- And in the middle of the show no less!?)
Shinpachi: KNOCK IT OFF DAMMIT!! YOU CAN’T JUST GO MODIFYING WHAT PEOPLE SAY ON A WHIM!! WHAT ABOUT FIXING THE CLOCK?!
Gintoki: What you mean there’s another way?
Shinpachi: I’M TALKING ABOUT YOUR EVIL SCHEMES OVER THERE!! WHY NOT USE YOUR APTITUDE FOR EVIL FOR THE GOOD OF SOCIETY?!
(Shinpachi’s sign- Boob groping fist.)
Kagura: Shinpachi, what is that paper. What is the Boob groping fist?
Forget it. I cannot rely on you piles of trash, yes? I will do it.
(Kagura’s note: Please fix this clock. Kagura.)
Kagura: Afterwards when the needle moves again Gramps would have fixed the clock.
Mm? Looking at it closely there are lots of needles on this, yes?
Which one should I move?
Gintoki: I have no friggin’ clue.
Shinpachi: Could it be that one of those is for days, another is for years? There are clocks that keep track of that too….maybe we should be careful in what we touch on this.
Kagura: Then we will just turn this one slightly. Uhuh.
This is pretty tough to move. It can’t budge it.
Nnngh…How is it? Was there any change?
Gintoki: He’s still just picking his nose. I guess it’s no good….hey try moving it with a little more oomph.
Kagura: Hngh!!

012
(Sfx- Chin *Ding*)
{DIDN’T THINGS ESCALATE A LITTLE TOO QUICKLLLYYYYYY?!}
Shinpachi: Kagura-chaaaaaaaaaaaan!!! You oomphed it a little too faaaaaaar!!
Gengai-san’s lifeline has been severeeeeeeed!!
Kagura: You guys rush too much. I just moved it five minutes and a broad change was created. I do not know how far we should allow the needle to go.
Gintoki: Maybe you’re moving the needle that corresponds to years. We probably shouldn’t try to move it all at once and take our time.
Shinpachi: What are we going to do?! Gengai-san’s passed on!! Without him the clock is…
Gintoki: Cool it. We’ve still got a way out of this.
If the clock’s needle can be moved forward…
Then it’s obvious we can move it back to what it was right?

013
Kagura: It is true! Now we are back to the point where the clock was broken!
Shinpachi: That’s awesome! Now we’ve returned~
Gintoki: Okay. This time let’s be a little more careful in how we allow time to progress mmkay?
(Sfx- Gigigi *griiiind*)
(Sfx- Gigigi *griiiind*)
???: Um…sorry…
But it looks like nothing is really happening with this progression. He’s still mining for gold there.
How are we even sure time is doing….anything?
Gintoki: Something is happening. It’s just that snot is pretty far down there.
Shinpachi: If that’s the truth then how many years will it take before we see a change?
Kagura: Nnnnh. It already feels like a couple of days has already passed. We should move the needle more yes?
Shinpachi: To what extent is he going to keep digging up his nose for snot?
Gintoki: What the freak man?! Are you going to stop any time this century?! Do we need to call an Ambulance for you?!
Shinpachi: For whaaat?! It hasn’t changed at all from before has it?!
Kagura: Maybe we should just be patient, yes? Once he has lost interest in digging up his nose he will then see the clock.
Shinpachi: Noo, it’s pretty obvious time isn’t going anywhere!! Let’s just take the clock and push the needle a little more..

014
(Sfx- Chiiin *diing*)
{SUDDEN RAPID CHANGE MUUUUUCH?!}
Gintoki: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!? ONE PAGE LATER AND THIIIIIIS?!
Shinpachi: WHY IS HE SO INTERESTED IN PICKING HIS NOSE?! EVEN IN HIS DEATH PORTRAIT HE’S STILL GLEEFULLY GOING AT IT?!
Gintoki: That’s why I said we should call the ambulance. I mean I sorta figured that this would happen.
Shinpachi: You didn’t figure anything! He dug up his nose to death!! Who in the world would be able to pull that sort of thing off?!
Kagura: Before we worry about the clock it seems important to stop gramps from dying first.
I will be more careful with the time and try to close in for a stop right before his death.
Shinpachi: Huh? Gengai-san is gone…
Gintoki: No, he’s over here.
Dude he did it!
Finally! This is so awesome!
Shinpachi: Th—that is…

015
Shinpachi: I mean…he completed the clock’s repairs right before his death!?
So wait that means he went ahead and fixed it somewhere that we couldn’t see him? Then…why aren’t we and the world returning to normal?
Gintoki: Shot in the dark, but I think it might have something to do with the way he dies.
Take a gander at that.
Shinpachi: A—a Truck?!
Gintoki: More likely than not the old guy fixes the clock and in his joy hops out in the road and meets the truck in a tragic way.
And right after that the newly fixed clock is once again broken.
Shinpachi: Then if we can save Gengai-san and he can finish repairing the clock we would have hit two birds with one stone.
Awesome! With this…
THAT’S JUST HIS SNOT ISN’T IIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!
(Sfx- Paaaaaaan *thoooop*)
Shinpachi: AFTER SPENDING A LONG ASS TIME UP HIS NOSE IT’S ONLY OBVIOUS HE’D FIND SOMETHING HUGE DOWN THERE!! STUPID OLD MAN!!
Kagura: Well anyway we’ve saved his life and the snot is no more, nope.
Now that his heart’s desire has been fulfilled he can fix our clock after we set time forward. Shall we?

016
Old lady: Poor thing.
He was just driving along when something hit his front glass and he ended up crashing into this telephone pole…
(Sfx- Chiiin *dding*)
{HASEGAWA-SAN WAS THE GUY DRIVING THE TRUUUUUUUUUCK!?}
Shinpachi: WHHHHHHHHY?! WE SAVED GENGAI-SAN JUST TO DOOM HASEGAWA-SAN IN HIS STEAD?!
TO THINK THAT WE’D MEET AN AQUAINTENCE IN A PLACE LIKE THIS!!
Kagura: It is because you tossed a booger at the truck that this happened, yes?
Shinpachi: I DON’T WANT TO HEAR COMPLAINTS FROM SOMEONE WHO GAVE BIRTH TO A MONSTER LIKE THAT!!
Gintoki: Dude simmer. We’ll just toss the snot away again.
This time we’ll just trash it and that’ll put the kibosh to that tragic story.
Awwright. This time we should be good.

017
Old lady: Poor thing.
He was sleeping under this telephone pole and something ended up on his face suffocating him…
(Sfx- Chiin *ding*)
{HE WAS RIDING ON CARDBOARD INSTEAAAAAAD?!}
Shinpachi: Th—that snot is nothing to sneeze at! This guy truly is unlucky!!
Kagura: This is useless. We cannot separate him from his fate, yes?
Gintoki: For crap’s sake. This doesn’t even have anything to do with the old man or his snot. Fine, lets just move him to a safer area.
There! Here he should be absolutely fine!
(Sfx- Hyuuuuhhh *Wffffffht*)
(Sfx- Chiiin *dding*)
???: He died of natural causes.
{WHAT THE HELL ARE NATURAL CAUSES?!}
Shinpachi: How on earth do we save him from dying of natural causes?!
What are we supposed to do?! We try and try to save him and in the end he ends up dying in another way!!
Gintoki: Dammit. Boned if he lives here, boned if he lives there…
There’s gotta be a way dammit…
There’s gotta be a way to save everyone…!!
(Side text- The Yorozuya who run through time…)
GINTAMA LESSON 484…………..END.