Gintama 237

It's funny how these one shot gag chapters mirror each other, and yet are so different. This is pretty similar to Katsura's basketball dream sequence (the last few pages). In any case....remember not to let sleeping children lie.

(Top text- The next cover will be pretty swave and un-gintamalike! Grab the newest volume #26 in stores Thursday December 4th!)

(Sign- Yorozuya-Gin-chan)

(Side text- Even vegetation sleeps once the clock hits midnight….)

(Sfx- Chiku taku chiku taku *tick tock tick tock*)

GINTAMA
Lesson 237: Don’t let sleeping children lie.
SORACHI HIDEAKI

002

(Sfx- Pachi *Ping!*)

Kagura: I can not sleep.

Not even a wink.

(Sfx- basatsu *fwomp*)

Kagura: Even my reflexes. They are awake

Every part of me is awake.

I can not sleep.

(Sfx- Garara *raaaatle*)

(Sfx- Pata pata)

(Sfx- guuu guuu *snoooore snooore*)

(Sfx- guu guu *snooore snooore*)

(Sfx- Don don *bam bam*)

003

Gintoki: What?

Kagura: I can not sleep.

Gintoki: Uh-huh.
Gintoki: Do what you want, but don’t stay up too late. We’ve got work tomorrow.

(Sfx- Don don *Bam bam*)

Gintoki: What do you want?

Kagura: I can not sleep.

Gintoki: You said that already.

Listen, I don’t care if you can or can’t sleep….but at least keep it down.

Since we’ve got things to do tomorrow.

(Sfx- Koso koso *shift shfiift*)

004

Kagura: I can not sleeeeeeep~

(Sfx- Goro goro goro *roll roll roolll*)

Gintoki: What the hell are you doing?!

Kagura: I need you to help. I can not sleep~

Gintoki: What do you want me to do?! Stop that!!

Kagura: Let me sleep here.

Gintoki: Huh?

Kagura: Use the power of your soul. You have it don’t you? The power to help me sleep.

Gintoki: Quit making stuff up!! Of course I can’t do that!! Scram!!

Kagura: Let me use your futon. It looks comfy.

Surely if I use your comfortable futon, I will sleep easy. Yes?

Gintoki: No way! This belongs to me! Besides it’s the exact same one that you have, and I can’t fit into your ‘room’!

Kagura: That is fine. Move.

Gintoki: Guwaaah!!

(Sfx- Buaatsu *swish*)

(Sfx- Dogaaaaa *kick!*)
Kagura: This feels nice.

I will sleep well. This futon ensures it.

Gintoki: Yeah? Well I hope you sleep forever brat.

005

(Sfx- Pachi *Ping!*)

Kagura: I cannot sleep.

Gintama: NOTHING CHANGED THEN!!!

Kagura: I thought so. It is meaningless. I cannot sleep.

Moreover this futon, it smells like an old man.

Gintoki: Who’s decision was it to change them?!

Kagura: I would prefer that futon. You will change with me yes?

Gintoki: Make up your mind!!

Kagura: I cannot sleep. Because of this, I think of various things.

Perhaps in thinking, I will find something that will cause sleep.

I am not sure, was it before I fell asleep that I remembered this? Or was it while I was sleeping?

Gintoki: Just close your eyes and sit there quietly! The more you talk, the more you won’t sleep!

Kagura: But you know Gin-chan. I thought of something.

What happens to the eyes when one sleeps? Do eyes really remain in place? Do they roll around while we sleep?

It is so dark. What if we are not actually sleeping?

Perhaps our eyes leave while we are sleeping. They may go and take a break. They may figure we will not wake up, and leave all night.

006

Gintoki: STOP ITTTTT!!

NOW I CAN’T SLEEP EITHER!!

What the hell is wrong with you?! Now I can’t get the image of eyeballs rolling around out of my head!!

What if they’re rolling right on our foreheads?! Or right underneath the blankets?! I’d freak out dammit!!

Kagura: It’s while we sleep that they flee. Through the nose. Or the mouth. That might be why we have bad tastes in our mouth.

Gintoki: STOP IT.

Kagura: If our eyeballs can come out on their own, where do they go? Maybe while all the people sleep, they travel across the universe to where they were born. Or they go and create more eyeballs.

Gintoki: KNOCK~IT~~OFF!!!

(Sfx- Gabaaa *Wiff!*)

Gintoki: I can’t sleep now! I can’t even think of sleeping!!

What if they really go while I’m sleeping?! What’ll I do!? Now I’ll lie awake every night thinking about it!!

What the hell!! That doesn’t make a damn bit of sense!! Listen go to sleep and I promise to give you something good to eat!

Kagura: My head is throbbing. At this rate I will never sleep again.

Gintoki: Cut me some slack kid!! We’ve got work tomorrow!!

007

Gintoki: Look It’s already 2:30. We’ve got to be up in seven hours.

Look, I heard that Napoleon had trouble sleeping, and would be up until 4 am.

He’d be really freaking out. ‘I have to be up in three hours, but I haven’t slept a wink yet’

Kagura: What would he do? Gin-chan?

Gintoki: Give me a minute, I’ve got to make u—I mean remember the rest.
In any case, it’s not a major deal.

People like him and us have to sleep in order to function during the day.

Especially after working up a sweat all day long just getting by.

It’s the best reward for a day of honest living to sleep with your family gathered around.

That’s it, let it all sink in. Working hard, getting rest…it all goes hand in hand.

Since I do all of the work around here, don’t you think I deserve a little bit of rest for tomorrow?

(Handwritten- Please Don’t just lie around, help me clean up!)

Kagura: You say that. But it seems wrong.

Gintoki: Whatever. If you want to sleep go take a run around the block.

Do that, and you’ll collapse into bed. I promise.

Kagura: I understand. I will go around the block.

Gin-chan. Stay awake! Do not go to sleep before me!

008

(Sfx- uto uto *Shift shfit*)

Kagura: Gin-chan.

I am calling. Gin-chan.

(Sfx- Hah hah zeh zeh )

Kagura: I can not sleep.

I ran around the block *hah*

But now I am *phew* revved up *hah* And not sleepy *Cough*

Gintoki: What the hell?! Did you go run a marathon? Why are you so out of breath?! And your body’s all sweaty now!

Kagura: I did! I ran about fifty paces. All around the block.

But I do not feel sleepy. Just more energetic.

Gintoki: Just what ARE you anyway? I’d say a robot…being able to run that far and those dead eyes.

Anyway if that’s the case don’t move. You should grow sleepy.

Don’t even come close to my futon either. I don’t want your sweat all over my futon okay?

Kagura: No. I want to fall asleep. We have to be close. I want to make sure you do not fall asleep before me.

(Sfx- Goso goso *rustle rustle*)

009

Gintoki: Holy cow. Don’t tell me after all of this you’re hungry too? I thought you were sleepy!

I think the problem here is that you have no idea what you want.

Kagura: I am hungry. Want food.

Gintoki: Seriously? Well go silently and get yourself something then.

That sound is getting on my nerves.

(Sfx- Gururu Gururu guuu *groooorwl groooowwwlll*)

Gintoki: I really can’t sleep…..

Fiine, Fine then I’ll go get you something…just go take a bath.

There isn’t a person on earth that can eat a heavy meal and not get sleepy.

So we’ll fill your stomach, and hopefully that’ll put you to sleep.

If this keeps up I won’t be able to get any shut eye either.

Kagura: Gin-chaaaaaaaan!!

Gintoki: You stink! Just go take a bath already!

Kagura: Okay! Thank you! Gin-chan!

(Sfx- Bata *Droop*)

Gintoki: The things a guy has to do to catch a break….

010

Kagura: Gin-chan.

Gin-chan…

I really can not sleep.

Even after a bath. Even after eating. I can not sleep.

(Sfx- hiffu hiffu hiffu hiifu hiifuu)

Gintoki: Oh, for all the food you ate you’d BETTER go to sleep or I’ll HELP you tubby!

Kagura: I am only full. Not sleepy.

Gintoki: How can I drill it into your thick skull that we have things to do tomorrow?!

Kagura: It is no good. I’m in pain.

I will go run around the block again. Lose some weight.

Gintoki: Don’t you dare!! If you keep this up we’ll fall into some kind of perpetual cycle !!

011

Gintoki: Fine! I get it! You can sleep here all day tomorrow. Shinpachi and I will handle the work on our own.

That way you don’t even need to worry about getting any sleep tonight, and can stay up.

Kagura: I will not! I want to help you two tomorrow! I will find a way to rest and be up early!

Gintoki: How much help do you think you’ll be with a stomach like that?!

Dude, seriously it’s 4 am! We have to be up by 7 tomorrow!

Even Napoleon wouldn’t be able to wage war with three hours of sleep! Even if his mom woke him up and made his favorite breakfast!

‘Even I who am great wouldn’t be able to’ he’d say!

Kagura: I understand. I will not bother you then. Since it seems that you cannot help.
I will simply turn on the radio and sit here quietly while you sleep.

Gintoki: Fine. Just keep it down.

{It’s your main man DJ Jiro! It’s time for you to wet those eyes cause I got your three minute tear session comin to ya.}

{Today’s tear session is brought to us by a guy who calls himself Tom-san.}

{‘Sorry Jerry’}

{I’ll start off by talking about a friend of mine that I’ll never forget…..we met 10 years ago in Spring.}

{My daddy had brought him home after work, a little doggy that would soon become my dearest partner.}

012

{It’s name was Jerry.}

{Jerry and I would play together all of the time.}

{No matter where I’d go Jerry wouldn’t be too far behind. We were inseparable.}

{I taught him lots of commands, but the one he knew well was ‘wait.}

{Even when his food was waiting in front of him, Jerry knew instinctively to wait for me before eating.}

{Jerry would meet my other friends and play with them, but that never caused a problem.}

{Because deep down Jerry and I knew that we had a special bond that none of the other children would ever understand.}

{However I made many friends as time went by…human friends.}

{Sometimes I wouldn’t come back for Jerry for a long time, but he would still remain waiting for me.}

{As long as he was able to, Jerry would remember that command, and wait for me before he would eat or do anything.}

{‘Waiting’}

{Ever patient, Jerry wouldn’t move an inch until he saw me return. Jerry’s loyalty wouldn’t allow him even one step.}

013

{However our fortune wasn’t as patient, as Daddy ended up getting laid off once his company went bankrupt.}

{It wasn’t long until our pockets were empty, and we had to run away from debt collectors by night.}

{Our life sunk to the depths…our current situation bleak.}

{The other children abandoned me, and went on with their lives…}

{With our sudden reversal of fortune, I knew that I couldn’t take Jerry with us, as we could barely afford to take care of ourselves.}

{So I made a seemingly level-headed decision.}

{‘Wait.’}

{I turned my back on him.}

{I disappeared right before his eyes.}

{About two months have passed.}

{And my journeys have brought me to many places.}

{I often wonder what happened to Jerry who wouldn’t dare back away from his orders..}

{I comfort myself by hoping that Jerry too would disobey our friendship and move from that spot.}

{Worry attacks me often.}

{Would he grow angry and seek me out for abandoning him? Was Jerry going to forgive me should we see each other again? Would he grow to hate humans? I drouwned in doubt.}

014

{But Jerry was…}

{Not the kind of Dog to disobey.}

{Jerry had indeed waited the whole time there for me….}

{Not taking a single step, until he had saw I returned.}

Dad?: Poor thing….

He waited here for two months, although he was abandoned by someone..

Who knows what kinds of hardships he’s encountered here….

Yet he stayed the whole time waiting, not wanting to break the promise between the two of you.

I don’t think there’s anyone who would stay to this extent.

I wonder if he simply doesn’t realize his master isn’t coming back….or if he knows and doesn’t care?

Either way it’s a heartbreaking story…

{I put my hand on his quivering head…it was still soft.}

{Slowly opening his eyes he looked up at me.}

{The moment he knew that I had returned his tail started to wag…}

{It was the only movement he could muster…}

015

Man: Young lady…

As I thought you’re the owner…

(Sfx- gusu hikku *Sniffle sniff*)

Girl: Jerry was waiting for me….

I told him to stay and he did…

Ever since that day….always….

Jerry!! Please tell me! Tell me how I can make this up to you!! What can I do to prove how sorry I am?!

You’ve done so much for me!! I’ll do anything!!

I don’t want you to be sad any more, I’m sorry I abandoned you!! There’s no one else like you in this whole world!

If only I had taken our friendship as seriously as you did..

But I…I didn’t even…

I didn’t treasure our friendship half as much!!

(Sfx- Potata *drip drip*)

Girl: Uwaaaah…

Man: There’s no need to apologize…

He waited for you….

And you returned.

There’s nothing more to it.

To be able to meet you again is a wish come true for him.

Girl: That’s not enough!! I betrayed him! And now he’s going to die!! And it’s all my fault!

Man: Jerry’s not dead little missy! He’s alive a

Girl: Where? Where is he?

Man: Of course he’s…

Right here….

016

Man: RIGHT BEHIND YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!

(TN- Sorachi wins everything. Put your copy of jump down and worship him. He will know if you aren’t.)

(Sfx- Gobaaa *ROOOAR*)

(Sfx- Gyaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!)
(Sfx- Dogo *Thwook!*)

017

Gintoki: WHAT THE CRAP WAS THAT?!!

Who would tell that kind of story at this time in the morning?! Quit screwing around with me you idiots!!

(Sfx- Para para *crackle crackle*)

Gintoki: Was that a story to inspire tears or fears?!

Now there’s no way I’m going to be able to sleep!

I think I had a heart attack! No…I DEFINATLY had a heart attack!!

Kagura, no more radio! You’ll just have to sit there quietly and…

(Sfx- Guu guu *snooore snooore*)

Gintoki: H---Huh…she’s asleep.

Well good for you, brat….now at least I can get some shut eye.

It may not be much, but at least I can rest easy now that she’s knocked out.

{RIGHT BEHIND YOUUUUUUUUUUUU}

(Sfx- Gabaaaaaa *swiffff*)

018

Gintoki: No---Nothing.

Che- Not like I’m scared or anything like that…I mean I’m fine.

Besides, I’m old enough to be able to tell the difference between a horror stint and a gag stint…so I’m absolutely---

{RIGHT BEHIND YOUUUUU}

(Sfx- Gabaaaaa *Swwiiiisssh*)

Gintoki: Holy crap…I think I’m hearing things…

Gintoki: ….dude….

Is it me that can’t get to sleep this time?

(Sfx- Zuru zuru *drag drag*)

Gintoki: C—Cough!!

(Sfx- Gohoon geho geho goho goho *cough cough cough cough cough*)

(Sfx- Gabatsu oeeee *gaaaagh bleeeeh*)

Gintoki: Sorry about all of the noise Kagura, I’m feeling a little sick…

019

Gintoki: Ka-Kagura-cha~n.

Wakey wakey, I want to apologize for being such an ass earlier.

I know now that insomnia is serious business!

…Kagura-chan? Are you listening to me?

Hey wake up! Wake up I said!

WAKE UP!!! DON’T SCREW WITH ME DAMMIT!! YOU CAN’T JUST FALL ASLEEP WITHOUT ME!!

I’LL THROW YOU OUT!! YA HEAR ME?!

WAKE UP!! I’LL GET YOU MORE TO EAT!!

AT LEAST FOLLOW ME TO THE BATHROOM !!

Now you’re asking for it!! I’ll pop you one if you don’t wake u….

Guwah!

Okay! You’re totally awake now!! Now come with me and…WAKE UP!! I’ll hit you!!

Come on please!! Don’t leave me alone!

Somebody!!!!!

HELP ME GET TO SLEEEEP!!!!
(Side text- Count some sheep!!)

GINTAMA LESSSON 237………….END.