Gintama 495

[Gintama 495 Translation by Kewl0210]
Page 1:
Insert: There's an Aizen Kou pandemic going on!!
Tae: I've realized.
Ttle: 'Gintama'
Tae: Every time I saw that person's face as he stubbornly kept following me around,
I would get queasy and do horrible things.
But when that man stopped appearing behind me
I realized.
This feeling
isn't disgust.
The person being chased after
wasn't me.

Page 2:
Tae: I was
the stalker.
Kondou-sannnn! [Heart]
SFX: SHAN
Tae: What are you doing flirting with another woman?!!
Did you forget that you were a gorilla stuck in a cage that's monitored 24 hours a day?!!
SFX: GYAAAAAAAA BUN BUN
Shin: Sisteeer!!
What happeeened?!! Because of that love potion Sister turned into a fiendish stalker!
SFX: DOGOGO
Kon: Help meeee!!
Aizen Myouou-samaaa!!
Handwritten: It's coming off! It's coming oooooff!
Guys: Wh-Who is that woman?!
This place is dangerous. Get Aizen Myouou-sama to shelter...
SFX: DODOO

Page 3:
People: Wh-
SFX: GYAAAA
People: Whaaat?!!
Kyuu: I've realized.
Up until now, I have embraced feelings much like love
towards Tae-chan's dignified appearance.
But now I've realized.
What I was seeing was not her, but the...
dignified thing
growing between her legs.
Someone: Someone like that is growing on Sisteeer?!!
Kyuu: And regarding something like that between the legs, then anyone's will do.
Someone: Anyone's will do?!! You're in love with the p*nis itself is love?!
Kyuu: I'm going to hunt every last one of them!
This is a t*sticle huuunt!!
SFX: ZUOOO

Page 4:
Guys: Kuh... Shit, just leave the palanquin!!
A waaall!!
Don't let them take one step through here!!
SFX: DOGOO
Guys: Wh-What the heeell?!!
SFX: GYAAAAA
Guys: Y... You bastard...
Kon: I've realized.
SFX: GOGOGO
Kon: Aizen Myouou? My heart was taken by some woman that I don't even know who is... What have I been doing all this time?
Now I remember everything. What my heart is dedicated to, that which I am in love with...
Araahn! I'm sorry! I just saw so many tasty looking men's asses.
is only butts.
Shin: They came oooooff!! He thought his eyes opened! When those came off he awoke on a different path!!
Kon: Forget somebody like Aizen Myouou, have some fun with uuus!! [Heart]
Shin: They've formed an army!! The guys that lost their t*sticles have made one big army!!
Guy: Wh... Who are those guys?!!! GYAAAA!!
SFX: WAH

Page 5:
Kagura: A path!!
With everyone's help, it has opened, yes?!!
Shin: No, these guys are all just doing whatever they want!!
Someone: We give you our thanks, Otae, Kyuubee, Gorilla.
SFX: GYAAA GYAAA
Tsuku: We promise we'll pay ya back.
I'll get back all yer real hearts!!
SFX: DAH
Tsuku: Don't let Hotaru get awaaay!!
Kagura: We will take these guys!
SFX: DODOH
Gin: Gooo, Honey!!
SFX: GOH DOON
Gin: Go slap that drowsy-eyed honey awake!!
I know you can do it, honey.
I believe in you.

Page 6:
SFX: WAAAA GAH
Tsuku: ...Honey, eh?
This might be tha last time I get called that.
Farewell
darling.
Title: Lesson 495
Eternal Flower
Author: Sorachi Hideaki

Page 7
Gin: Umm, Honey... We can't really say "farwell" like thi...
Tsuku: D-Don' touch me, beast!!
Er, sorry I dunno why I did that...
SFX: ZUGOBAKI
Tsuku: I dunno.
I've never fallen in love with a man.
Girl: I had one in my hometown.
But we ended up parting without me ever being able to say anything.
If it's good enough to make you like someone you don't like at a place like this,
then it would probably have been enough for me to tell him my feelings.
If only a love potion like that existed,
then I could've been honest with him.
Tsuku: Is there any point to conveying feelings you could only convey by relying on something like that?
Girl: You might be right... but it's all so difficult. Liking a person.
I'm sure someday you'll understand once you find someone you really like.

Page 8:
Hotaru: Tsukuyo-chan.
Ironic, isn't it?
You, who said back then that you didn't understand what falling in love with someone was
has now come to block my love's pathway.
Gin: Can't you take a hint? We were finally alone gazing at this night scenery.
Tsuku: Why're you standin' over theeere?!!
SFX: GOH
Hotaru: Tsukuyo-chan, did you perhaps find a man you like?
Huhu. Might it be this person?
Tsuku: That's not a person! That's a beast that stands on two legs!
Gin: I'm actually standing on a third leg.
Hotaru: The hell're you talkin' about?!
Hotaru: But now it's too late. You had best run while you still can.
I have transported all of the remaining Aizen Kou here.
My jumping down from here is the signal.
SFX: GAGOO
Hotaru: This will be a sea of fire.
SFX: ZUN
Hotaru: The fire will probably stay lit for three days and nights.
But the smell of the Aizen Kou and the smell of myself burning will never leave everyone's minds.

Page 9:
Gin: Don't be so hasty. The only thing a woman should be jumping into is a man's bosom. If you're going to fall somewhere, then let's fall together. Onto the street of passion.
Tsuku: Would ya shut up?
SFX: DOH
Hotaru: Tsukuyo-chan, I...
am a heartless woman that left that person and forgot him.
But even if this body of mine falls to ruin, don't you think that if I am loved by everyone, pour love into everyone,
and be a god for all eternity,
then that would be beautiful?
Tsuku: ..........
No matter how many people love ya,
and no matter how many people ya love,
ya can't ferget.
Ya can't ferget the feelings ya had for 'im.
No... Ya used the Aizen Kou in order ta ferget,right?
Women: Hey,
did you hear about Hotaru?
They say a great minister was talking about buying her contractual freedom, but she ignored him.
She says how she left a man she liked back in her hometown and she's still remained faithful to him after all this time.
She says she's sold her body, but she hasn't sold her soul.
Handwritten: Huuh?!
Woman: What an idiot~~ Like hell somebody like that would remember a woman that gets sold cheap in the red light district.
Yeah. She got some good customers angry. And the higher-ups are livid.

Page 10:
Women: Right now she's at some cheap shop
entertaining some strange customer.
Hotaru: Um... Sir?
Don't you think... you've drank a but too much?
If you drink that much, um... uh...
Guy: It's fine.
I'm just here because my parents forced me to.
I... I don't plan on doing anything dirty. So I just need to stay here and drink until my parents are satisfied.
SFX: HIC
Hotaru: Is... Is that so?
Guy: A... Also...
I'm satisfied with seeing you just sitting there happy.
You said your name is... Hotaru, right?
H... Hey, are you perhaps...
No way...
Tsuku: That carpenter apprentice that you met with for a while
would talk with you the all night without ever layin' a finger on ya, right?
Ya went back...
to having the face of a regular girl...
Guy: ...Hotaru,
Sorry, but this is the last time I'm gonna be coming to see you.
I'm not making any progress doing things like this.
If I want to be a full-fledged carpenter, I've got to put all my effort into training.
But once I'm able to stand on my own
I'll come back to get you.

Page 11:
Guy: Can you wait here for me until then...?
Hotaru: If I had done as that man said...
and waited here in Yoshiwara... maybe I could have lived in a dream I never woke up from.
But then, Housen was defeated and Yoshiwara was released.
And I tried to grasp that dream...
that illusion with my hands.
It was the daughter of the head carpenter.
That man... His skill had been acknowledged and was even going to succeed her father.
He had become a great carpenter.
One so great that a woman like me couldn't get near him...
I never... had a place outside Yoshiwara to begin with.
I knew that, and yet I... could not forget that man... and I could not take customers as I had before.
That was when I got my hands on that drug through the black market...
And before I realized it, I could not handle not having that drug.
Whenever I didn't like someone... I would remember that man.
I even seduced the person who sold it to me and gathered the drug to Yoshiwara.
It didn't matter who it was as long as I could keep loving...

Page 12:
Hotaru: But in the end I...
just wasn't able to use the love drug on that man.
If only a love potion like that existed,
then I could've been honest with him.
Tsukuyo-chan,
falling in love with a person really... is hard.
I've now... both forgotten how to love someone and to be loved by someone.
...So even if it's temporary,
let me sleep within a dream I'll never wake up from, among flowers that will never wilt...
Tsuku: Hota...
Gin: Sorry.
But if you're going to sleep somewhere, why not sleep in a rotating bed with me?
SFX: GAH
SFX: GAH
T/N: Rotating beds are often found in love hotels and that sort of thing.

Page 13:
Tsuku: What're ya doin' ya bastaaard!!
Yer tryin' ta seduce her at a time like thiiis?!
Gin: Hmph. I thought I'd be able to get down with her now. Your lucky day is the day you choose to act, right? Every other day is an unlucky day.
Tsuku: You're really gonna be going doooown!! And 365 days a year will be unlucky days!!
Hey, what the hell sorta position are the who 'a you in?!
Gin: I've got a part sticking out that should be easy to grab onto.
Tsuku: I'll grab you and throw you in jail!!
Let gooo!! Let go of Hotaru, beast!!
Gin: If I let go, we'll fall!! And die!!
SFX: GAN GAN
Gin: Our lives are in your hands, Honey. I'm counting on you. Hey!
Tsuku: HAH!!
SFX: GYUH
Tsuku: Let gooo!! Let go of my hand, beast!!
Er, wait! I'm the one holding on!! I can't let go!!
SFX: GAN GAN
Hotaru: Ts-Tsukuyo-chan!
SFX: PUHAH
Hotaru: Hurry, get out of here!!
Guys: That's the signal!!
Hotaru: If you don't, you and your friends will also be...
Tsuku: That's enough!!
I'll be fine, okay...?
SFX: MISHI MISHI
Tsuku: I'm not running.
Hotaru......
Because now
I can understand...

Page 14:
Tsuku: That dang love potion
didn't serve any purpose.
I couldn't be
one bit honest.
Everybody's the same as you, Hotaru...
Before those flowers... Any wiles or way of loving or ways of being loved get totally forgotten.
Women live... with a single unwieldy flower like that in their hearts.
And it's true there might not be a flower like that that blooms ferever.
It might be a flower that fades and wilts pretty easily.
Handwritten: FIRRRRE!
Tsuku: But Hotaru, no matter how many times it wilts, when the seasons change
that flower blooms again.
SFX: DOON
Hotaru: Ts-Tsukuyo-chaaaan!!
Ruuuuuuuuuun!!
SFX: OOOOOOOO

Page 15:
SFX: GAH
SFX: DOFUU
SFX: DOON DOO
SFX: DOO
SFX: GOO
SFX: GAGAH

Page 16:
Tsuku: Hotaru......
I don' think that a flower that's never known wilting is beautiful.
SFX: KARAAN
Tsuku: No matter how many times the petals fall, it blooms again.
Tha's why... love is beautiful.
Hotaru
you can still
keep blooming plenty.
Guys: FIRRRRRRE!!
SFX: DOON
SFX: UOOOOOOO
Gin: HONEEEEEEEY!!
SFX: DOON
Tsuku: DARLINNNNNNG!!
SFX: GUOOOO

Page 17:
Gin: I won't let
the petals of one more flower of my honeys faaaaal!!
Insert: A flash---!!
Bottom: Gintama
...Lesson 495
/ End