Gintama 38

01)
O: Gimme a friggin' break here!!
O: Do you have any idea how many people are suffering because of your barbarism?
?: Just shut up already, ya shitty old bag!!
?: Why are you getting all worked up just because you received the circular notice later than everyone else?!
O: Listen here!!
O: Kabuki-chou certainly has its share of clean and not-so-clean places, and it's a pretty crazy place!!
O: BUT, that's exactly the reason why you can't expect us to go on living under these ridiculous rules of yours!!
?: Speaking of which, granny, didn't you throw out a Jump into the burnable garbage recently?!
O: HELL NO! You idiot, that was the punk who lives up on the seecond floor..
G: Man, are they loud...
?: Don't play innocent!! You're just acting all high-and-mighty because you're called the "Empress" of Kabuki-chou!!

02)
G: Hey, you two demonbeasts are getting pretty noisy out here...what time do you think it is? How much blood pressure do you think I have to spare?
O: Shut up, you poor excuse for a human!!
?: Proper humans have already started their day by now!!
G: You monsters really still think you count as humans? I thought we already covered this...
SFX: Dosa
?: The only reason he fell is because he dared to stand up to me!
?: I'm taking this one into custody.
O: Do as you like!
SFX: Zuzu...
K: Shinpachii, what type of monster is that?
SFX: Zuru zuru
S: Nn? That's the same type as Otose-san...
S: She's one of the 4 Big Devas who control Kabuki-chou.
S: "KISHIN" (*Fierce God)
S: "MADEMOISELLE SAIGOU!"

03)
Sign: (top part) Drag Queen's Clubhouse
Sign: (bottom) BOYS and GIRLS can both come play here together <3
S: Everyone, here's our new tenant from today forward...
S: Paako-chan!
?: Oooooh, soooo cute! But why "Paako?"
S: It's the "paa" from her natural perm! (*In Japan, perm is pronounced paamu)
?: Ooooh, mama, pleeaaase, can she be my guest?
G: Excuse me, but my stomach is hurting so I'm going to have to leave early.
SFX: Gah
S: You can't run away~~

04)
S: I'm going to teach you what it's REALLY like to live in Kabuki-chou!
G: Erm, no thanks, I live there, so I already kinda know...
S: I'm going to teach you the sublime lifestyles enforced upon these okama (*men dressed as women) that you so fondly referred to as "monsters!"
G: C'mon, please, have some mercy on me. Besides, I'm the main character...
SFX: Ora!
G: The new admittee has been tossed out onto "Okama Road!"
G: What are you doing here, Dzura?
D: I'm not Dzura.
G: Okay, Dzurako. (*-ko is a feminine character attached to girls to be cute.)

05)
Shop sign: Soba Place
D: Hey, pops, where's my Ten-soba? (*Heaven Soba, think of it as the name of a special dish)
?: Yes, please wait one minute!
D: One minute?! What are you gonna do, heat up a cup ramen in the microwave as an out or something?
SFX: Gata
D: Down, Elizabeth!
D: I heard that the control over outlawly rounin has become more strict lately...
D: Don't go doing anything reckless out here in the open like this.
SFX: Don
W: Yes, one moment!

06)
D: YOU BASTAAARD!!
SFX: Gashan
D: Did you forget that you just took my order WAAAAY before that guy's?!
W: Mister Samurai, please show mercy on me!
W: This person happens to be a special...
D: I don't care what kind of customer you get, equality towards all should be your policy as a shopowner!
D: That is the difference between a restuarant's success and failure!
S: Now, now, Mr. Samurai, you wouldn't want to throw a punch over a thing like this...here, I'll do it instead.
D: Monsters should stay quiet.
SFX: Goh
SFX: Zushaaaaa
S: Oi.
S: Who'd you call a monster?

07)
D: ...and so, I ended up here.
D: Since then, I've just been waiting for a good chance to sneak out, but...
SFX: Benbeke
D: Hey! Shake your hips a little more!
SFX: Ben ben
G: Dzura, I think you've breathed in a little too much of the air in here...it might be impossible for you to return to that corrupt world.
D: Get real.
D: I still have that big job of saving this country to complete...
D: I have no time to be doing something like this in this kind of place!
G: Who would want their country to be saved by a guy dancing around in this place anyway?
?: Heey now...Durako, Paako, your rhythm is totally off...
?: If you keep it up, you're going to ruin the customers' moods...
G: What are you saying, Agomi?! (*Ago = chin) My clumsiness is my biggest selling point!
A: WHO THE HELL IS AGOMI, DAMMIT!!
D: Paako, didn't I introduce her to you before? This is Agoyo.
A: NO I'M NOT!! AZUMI, MY NAME IS AZUMI!!

08)
?: HEEY! What do you think you're doing?
?: All I hear are smackin' gums!!
?: Ya see, I just came all the way out here to purposely laugh at ya'll!!
?: Now com'on, do some more stupid shit! Ya damn monsters!!
G: What was that, you bamboo-screen grandpa? Are you really going to waste what little aspirations you have left in this place!?
D: Down, Paako.
SFX: Gah
S: Honored guest...
S: Didn't I tell you that jeering at those trembling, sweaty dancing girls on the stage is absolutely forbidden?
S: DON'T UNDERESTIMATE OKAMA!!!
SFX: Gashan

09)
S: More sublime than a woman, burlier than a man...
S: That is mama's favorite phrase.
S: If sexually indecisive people like ourselves didn't even have as much as pride in ourselves, really, what would we be to the world?
S: More than anything, more than anyone, okama must have strength.
G: Well then, Agomi, does that mean you're strong too? Agomi's chin can block anything?
D: There's only so much a chin can do...
D: Saigo-dono's power, though...now that's really strayed from the beaten path.
D: That isn't something a normal human is capable of.
A: She was even more incredible in the past, I hear.
A: How did it go, again...ummm...
A: I think she was called "Shiro-fun Saigo" (White Sumo Thong Saigo)
A: I don't really know the details, but she was called a great hero that rampaged along an entire city block just in a white fundoshi.
A: Wait...but with just that much info, she sounds more like a pervert than anything!

10)
D: Shiro-fun Saigo....
D: I'm pretty sure I heard that before...
?: Your dad is just a big O-KA-MA!!
?: You make me sick!!
?: C'mon, let's see you fight back!!
SFX: bashi bashi
?: You're nothing but a 'kama yourself!!
SFX: Pota pota
?: GYAAAAAAAA
SFX: bicha bicha
SFX: Bubah
?: IT'S AN OKAMA BEAM!! WE'LL TURN INTO OKAMAS IF IT HITS US!!
?: Run awaay!!
A: Hey, you alright?
A: Te...
A: Teru-kun!!

11)
S: TERUHIKOOOO!!
S: What happened to youuu?! With wounds this bad you should be at the hospital!! C'mon, let's go right away!!
S: Akahige!! Some one call Akahige!! (*Akahige = redbeard)
G: If it's Aohige (*bluebeard) you're looking for, you already have one. (*This is referring to the bluish-grey stubble)
S: I'm not talking to you!! Go away!!
T: I'm alright, father, really, this is nothing.
T: Guhoh!
S: Not father!! I told you to call me mother!!
S: Teruhiko, lately, you've just been getting hurt non-stop.
S: Honestly, what have you been up to? Are you hiding something from me?
T: D...don't worry about it, mom.
T: I was just swordfighting with my friends on the way home.
T: Well, I'm gonna go back out to play some more!
S: Hey, hold on a minute!

12)
S: Teruhikoooo!
S: Teru-kun!!
D: Youngster.
D: You forgot something.
SFX: Gon

13)
Letter: To all Parents and Guardians, Information about the School Visit
D: Don't worry, I won't show it to your father.
D: Or do you want me to deliver it to him?
T: ...No....thank you, Miss.
D: I'm not Miss, the name's Katsura.
D: You sure you're alright with your father not coming?
T: ...I'd like him to come, but...
D: Are you afraid of being made fun of again?
D: I don't care about myself. I've gotten used to that by now.

14)
T: But to see my father being laughed at...
T: I just don't want to see him hurt.
T: I love my father.
T: He's funny, gentle, and even a little scary sometimes.
T: But then...
T: ...there's also times where I'm reminded that my father really is a normal person.
Sign: Now Preparing
SFX: Gubi gubi
?: Mamaaa, you're drinking too much!
?: What with you all of a sudden?

15)
G: What's the big deal? Even okama want to get drunk every once in a while.
S: What do you know about being an okama?!
?: Exercise a bit of moderation for once!
?: Mama, and you too, Paako!
S: Honestly, I have absolutely no excuse for that kid...
S: For me to sit here and say that I wish there was a way for him not to be made fun of may seem strange...
S: But the truth is, it's all my fault.
G: ...eh? So you knew all along?
G: You should've said so earlier...

16)
G: Hmm...now, I guess he'll be made fun of because his dad looks like a yazuka.
G: If only I could make you look worse...maybe if I drew some shit on your forehead or something..
S: What the hell are you doing to me?!
S: When Teruhiko was very small, his mother died.
S: Out of the obligation I felt to step in as his mother and fill that void, I ended up becoming what I am now.
S: Of course, I don't regret a single thing that's happened up to now. And I don't think I'll have any in the future, either.
S: Even though there'll always be some guys out there who'll laugh at my ugly appearance.
S: But I will always intend to keep my soul...
S: ...more beautiful than any man or woman!!

17)
SFX: zah
?: Ohh, so you came after all.
?: You okama's boy.
T: ....don't talk that way to me any longer.
T: I am a man!!
T: And today, I'll show you two my proof!

18)
D: Gintoki...
D: I think I'm going to go back there.
G: Ah?
D: Don't answer me like you're half-asleep, asshole.
D: ...Somehow, that business between father and son has started to bug me.
G: If your okama percentage rises any higher, you're going to become one for real, you know.
D: Look, the monster's even passed out.
D: It's now or never.
D: We can run away any time we want, but now's our only chance to help.
G: Knock yourself out, Dzurako. I'll be cheering you on from the shadows.
D: Wait, Paako!
SFX: Gashi
G: OWOWOWOWOWOW!! You're going to become a real okama!!

19)
G: What's wrong, just go do it yourself if you want!
D: What are you saying, Paako? What about all the trials and tribulations we've suffered through together?
G: Who cares?!
D: It may be painful medicine, but we'll have to have Saigou-dono bear it for now.
D: Returning a debt is the due course of action for a samurai, is it not?
G: Do samurai really butt in on kids' fights?
SFX: zah
?: What is he doing, Yocchan?!
?: I dunno! He just suddenly...

20)
?: What, already?!
?: Lemme go!!
?: You okama are gonna infect us!!
?: You guys are so gross!!
G: Dzurako, he called you gross!
D: What are you talking about? That was directed to you, Paako.
G: It was you! Look at that smug face...go outside or something!
G: You're also making a really poor, destitute expression...give me back my stolen lunch money!!
?: Look man, we didn't do anything wrong!
?: We tried to stop him ourselves, but he just went nuts and ran in there...
G: I want the details here, so come on, spit it out!
SFX: Viiin
G: Or else I'll give you a buzzcut.
?: He...he was just trying to put his courage to the test!
?: It's something that's become popular among kids our age...
?: But this time, when we did it, that guy, he...

21)
G: ....a vacant house?
?: Where the hell do you get that?! This is the hole he ran into!!
?: Lately there's been some beast-like roaring sounds coming from the other side of this wall..
?: Something is DEFINITELY behind there...
G: ...some kind of monster mansion, huh?
G: Damn, Dzura, you're really incredible!
G: How the hell did you make it through this tight...hole...

22)
G: That? Oh, that?
G: Are you serious?
D: What are you doing...
G: Er, no, it's just that I, uh, can't move forward or backward now...
D: ...Paako. That's why you're a Paako.
G: Shut up, you bastard! The "Paa" is because of my natural perm!! (*"paa" is also a term for someone whose head is "blown up," and so they have no brains)
D: Because your head went "paa," that's why your hair grows out all funky and crooked like that. Hey, c'mon, put some power into it.
G: OWWWWW!! Hell no!! Look forget it, I'm just going to stay here until you're done!
SFX: Zah

23)
Question corner blah blah blah #9

Question from Pen Name Mizuki Ami-san:

For some reason, no matter how hard I try, I just can't draw Gin-san's hair. Is there any way you could possibly teach me?

<Answer>
At first glance, this guy's hair may seem really haphazard, but there's actually a science to it.
The important point here is how his hair is puiffed up. First, draw a normal face.

Then, going from left to right, start to puff up his hair all the way around.

Finally, pull out the hair above his ears on the sides like so, so that they're pointing opposite how they normally would.

OK, you did it!