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Translations: Gintama 683 by kewl0210 , One Piece 904 by cnet128

I'll teach you how to make children Oneshot : 1

+ posted by PROzess as translation on Oct 25, 2012 14:29 | Go to I'll teach you how to make children

Reserved for Japanzai

Kotsukuri no Houhou Ooshieshimasu

Page 01

Okay, Hanuma-kun.
See you tomorrow.
Bye, Kurisu-san.
I could talk with her a lot today...
I'm home.
Welcome back, Kyou. // You have a guest.
A guest?
I always thought you're a late bloomer, but you're surprisingly smooth.
Eh? // What?
Whatever, just hurry up.

Page 02

I'm Karma-chan.
Excuse me for imposing.

Page 03

Like I said, Karma...
Huh? You don't know me? I'm quite the famous god in India, you know---
What's with her. She's cute, but says some strange stuff.
No, // I don't get you. What do you want from me?
You're in luck. Me, a god, chose you!

Page 04

I myself will teach you how to make children now.
You're really lucky, Kyou-kun.
I'm quite busy, but I actually had some free time by chance.

Page 05

I don't really get it, but I don't want any weird teachings. Please leave.
Wah! Wait, wait! // I finally found a house that let me in! Please hear me out!
Karma-chan was it? // You're really not some scam seller?
Yes. I came here because I wanted to do something about the declining birth rate in Japan.
I don't understand what's she going on about, but she doesn't seem to be bad and I feel bad just sending her back..
Okay. // Then tell me your story.
Really!? // Thank you!
Okay then...

Page 06

Please fondle my breasts.
What are you doing!?

Page 07

I told you in the beginning // that I would teach you how to make children.
Y- You can't do that!
This is something you do with a person you love. It's not something you force.
Technically I'm not a person, but a god.....
I believe your sentiment is really fantastic, // but...

Page 08

But lots of couples break up because it gets awkward between them after they failed in their first intercourse for a lack of experience.
I just want to pass you the basics, so that such a thing won't happen to you.
Uh... // That might be so, but...
He really isn't up for it.
His feelings for his crush are real.
But that's not all, is it...?

Page 09

Say, // could it be you
have some kind of problem with your willy?
H- HUH!? // What are you saying? Of course not!
This reaction.... There's no doubt now.
It's okay! Show it to me. // We'll solve the problem together!
WAH // Hey, stop.

Page 10

So mean! Why are you doing this!?
Fine! Just laugh at my penis!
S- Sorry for being so forceful.
But it's a splendid penis. What's the problem?
I mean, it's so big. Isn't it weird? // In the past I was teased for it by the kids, so I made sure to not show it again...

Page 11

W- Well, it sure is above the average...
But if you aren't going to show it anymore, how are you going to have sex with your love?
I'll stay a virgin for life...
Don't worry! Just leave it to me!
Making children is a fantastic thing anyone can enjoy.
In my holy script, the Karma Sutra, the size of the man's lingram and the depth of the woman's yoni are divided in three categories for each: Horse, cow and hare for the man, elephant, mares and deer for the woman. Kyou-kun is the horse type, so if it's with an elephant type woman, he can have intercourse with her without problem.
R- Really?
Even I can have properly sex?
There's no problem if it's an elephant type woman. But most of the women, me included, are the mare type.
So with a mare type woman, she needs to have a build for deep penetration.
Deep penetration....?
Yes. It's a bit embarrassing, but...

Page 12

Women will receive it like this....
Th- This is a woman's....?

Page 13

Ah, // is it your first time seeing the actual thing?
You can touch it. // But be gentle.
O- Okay. // Then...
Yah! // Hey, what are this vibration!?
I- It's so warm and slippery...
Hanuma Kyou's body cramps due to his nervousness and excitement. His fingers became a natural rotor.
Hey, wait, Kyou-kun. // This is getting bad!
Ah... // Yah!

Page 14

S- Sorry, Karma-chan. // Did it hurt?
I... I'm fine. // You might have a talent...

Page 15

Kyou, // I brought some tea.
Eh, wait... Don't come in right now!!
Oh my. Are you doing something you don't want me to see? You became a splendid adult <3
I'm not an adult yet. Rest assured! // So go away.
Sure, sure.
That was close...
When you live with your parents, you can't have sex in peace. // I see. That's the reason for the declining birth rate...
No, // I don't think that's related...
Ah! I have a nice idea. // Come here.

Page 16

This is just a park.
Eh? But in the Japanese holy script "AV" they did it in a park....
That's not a holy script!
Eh? // I- Is that so...
A- Anyway, we don't have to worry about your parents here. // Let's proceed.

Page 17

H- Hey, even if it's night with no people around, what are you undressing for! // At least let's go into the bushes.
R- Right. I'm still not familiar enough with "AV"...
You as a Japanese sure are knowledged about it, Kyou-kun.
That's not it. It's common sense!
A- Anyway, let's find a nice bush.
Wah!! // Don't run around naked!!
Cram school lasted so long.
This park is a shortcut, but at night it's scary...

Page 18

Hold it, Karma-chan!
H- Hanuma-kun?
K- // Kurisu-san!? Why...
Don't "why" me! Rather back at you, what kind of play is this!?
Ehh!? // You got it wrong.
What did I get wrong? // This without a doubt a play, you rapist!!

Page 19

Karma-chan, you didn't need to tie her up...
No, she was overly excited, so I had no choice but to...
Ehm, Kyou-kun, do you know her?
Yeah, she's my crush...
O- Of course as a god, I knew that.
But what do we do now.
Oh! // How about you show her your love here?
Come again!?

Page 20

But I actually might be able to say it now.
Kurisu-san, please listen calmly.
I... I love you!
Please go out with me!
Please let me hear your answer...
F- Figures!!

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Level [C] Translator

About the author:

Alias: PROzess
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