Foo Fighter Fuji Oneshot : FOO FIGHTER FUJI

A cool oneshot almost a year old now. Art's super cool, concept is silly, but it's hilarious. Somebody scanlate!

...I wonder if the Foo Fighter's "Learn to Fly" had any influence on the name & subject of this comic? Perfect theme song, though.

01
-Guess what, Misaki?
-What is it, Joe~?

-The odds of a shooting star making it to the surface of the earth before burning up
-is less than 1 billion to 1!
-Wow, you're sooo smart! Sounds like the chances of finding your soulmate!

-...kind of like us, huh~?
-Woah, that's like, mega-romantic!

-GET OUTTA MY SIGHT!
box: Gizagaki Fuji / 16 years old
white: A boy with a terrible temper!! / What's eating him?

02
-How stupid

-Soulmates? Romance? Meh!

-Crap like that

-Doesn't exist!!

03
top white line: Set a course beyond Romance! Unidentified Flying Action headed your way in this 47-page One Shot!

white right: For you,
left: I'll fly anywhere! (t/n - i suggest reversing the order)

below: Miyokawa Masaru

04
-...aw, nuts! The main computer is busted
-I'll never be able to fix it...
-Guess I have no choice

-This is...
-a hospital?

-Oh, that's right!! I was hit by a shooting star?!

-But...I'm not sore anywhere
-What's going on?

05
-W-wha
-WHAT THE HELL!?

-What are these Crop Circle-looking marks!?
-Is it some kinda treatment I received?

-kachi

-UWAH!?!
-WHAT'S HAPPENING!?

06
-wh-
-whawha-
-WHAT IS THIIIIIS!?

-Is it...alive?

-poke

-Nnn...

07
-Nn..nn...
-Can't you keep it down?

-HEY!!
-WHY'D YOU OPEN THE CAPSULE!?
-huh??

-I'm sleep-deprived here!! (small: gosh!)
-Ah...s-sorry to wake you

--WAIT, NO I'M NOT!!
-WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU!?!

-Me?
-I'm Yuwaryet Stengrula Transvolance from the planet Touulunusulu!

-Yu-samawhatsit? Huh? Could ya say it again?
-Yuwaryet Stengrula Transvolance

-Yuuwa~ ...eh? The heck's that? Your name?

08
-I WASN'T ASKING YOUR NAME!!

-Your spaceship was busted
-because of me!?

-That's right!!
-You were the one who suddenly got in my way
-and crashed into MY ship!

-My ship was smushed to smithereens! (small: You're so mean! Meanie!)
-QUIT PINNING THIS ON ME!! (small: even if I wasn't there you'd still have crashed!!)

-So I had no choice...

09
-But to make YOUR body
-into my new spaceship!

-Hah??
-My body's a spaceship?
-I have NO clue what you're talking about
-How's my body a spaceship??

-...well, technically speaking the "body" can be just about anything
-But the ability to calculate the angle of atmospheric entry,
-as well as extrapolate 3rd cosmic velocities* within varying solar systems
(t/n - 3rd cosmic velocity = the minimum velocity that has to be imparted to a body relative to a planet's surface to drive it out of the solar system)
-Requires a really powerful computer to determine warp coordinates. And your body had one!

-Uh, I don't own a computer (small: Not even a cell phone!)

10
-I'm talking about your brain!

-Eh!?

-The brain is a fantastic computer
-By converting your body into a ship, I can draw out its full power

-Hold up! I don't know nothin' about calculating atoms-spheric whosamawatsit!
-Relax, it's possible even for an idiot like you
-WHAT!?
-Both geniuses and morons have the same cerebral structure, I mean. (small: just a difference of how you use it)

-Nnnnggggh!! Enough! I'm sick of listening to you go on an on!!

-I'm ripping this shit off right now!!
sfx bub: GAN
-Uwa!! What're you doing!?

11
-Stop, stop!! I worked so hard, don't break it!
-Shut up, Tinkerbell!!

-Gizagaki--!!

-I've been itchin' to pay you back for that humiliation!

-Eh!?
-Oh, it's Romeo (from the rooftop)

-What would've you done if Misaki saw me as a flunky n' broke up with me, huh?

-I've never liked you from the start!!
-Hey, wait! Now's not the time for--

12
-SHUT YER TRAP!

-Ch!
-All you care about is bein' popular with the ladies...
-but you always were...

-A flunky from the start!!

-HALT!!

13
-W-what the!?
-I can't move!

-BFG---!

-No fighting! You'll break!
-WHA!? YOU did this, alien!?

-Undo whatever you just did!!
-Or do you want me to be beat to a bloody pulp!?

-Enjoyin' yerself there, freak!?

-Guess I have no choice...

-LIFTOFF!

14
-DOWAAAAA!!
-W-wai-What!?
-Put me down! Put me down!!

-I told you! Half of the remodeling as already complete
-So your basic starcraft functions are perfectly operational!
-PERFECT, MY ASS! WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE?!

15
-Target located, sir

-It's the princess' signal

-owowow

16
-Ran out of fuel in 5 seconds, huh...

-Geez! You're not as useful as I thought
-I never imagined you'd be such a gas-guzzler...

-BE QUIET! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S ALL THE TROUBLE! (Why're you all full of yourself, anyway?!)
-MAKE ME BACK TO NORMAL THIS INSTANT!!

--WHAT THE F--THAT'S MY FOOD!!
-Silence! Ships shouldn't be talking back to their owners!

17
-More importantly, let me take a look at you. You took some damage from that crash-landing

-Oh, you have an oil leak
-THAT'S NOT OIL, IT'S BLOOD!!

-...gosh, and I had just stopped up this hole, too...

-Hey, Yuu-...whatever it was...did um, you

-Did you remodel me
-in order to save my life because of the accident?

-W-What are you talking about! Don't misunderstand!!
-I told you, I needed a new ship!!

-And who said you could abbreviate my name anyway!?

18
-Why are you even on earth in the first place?

-It doesn't concern you! Be quiet, earthling! (you primitive ape!)
-Why, you...

-I...
-I've been forced into an arranged engagement

-So she IS gonna tell me after all?
-I'm not ready to be married
-and...

-I can't stand the idea of marrying someone
-just because my parents picked him
-There's like, nothing romantic about it...

19
-I want a random accident that leads me to the person of my dreams! Like bumping into a transfer student who's busy chewing his lunchbread as he turns the corner!
-WHAT PLANET ARE YOU FROM AGAIN!?

-So basically you ran away
-How lame.
-WHAT!?

-All women are the same!
-I'll have you know romance doesn't exist!
-Oh?! And what makes you the expert!?

-Because there was a girl like that around
-who had the same stupid delusions like you

-She lived in my neighborhood, was older, and had never had a boyfriend
-She'd often come over my house to play

-Honestly I thought she was a complete idiot
-Even though she was older, she still believed in aliens and ghosts
-and had this stupid dream of bumping into a transfer student busy chewing his bread and falling in love from that...

20
-But then, one day

-Fuji!! Did you hear?
-She got engaged!!

-Aren't you glad you were set-up by a marriage interview?
-Marriage...
-interview?!

-Hey wait! What interview!?
-What happened to your dreamy transfer student!?
-Transfer student?

-Oh, that? Tehe!
-Please, those sorts of romantic encounters don't exist!
-In the end, it doesn't matter how you meet the one for you!

-Somehow, I felt deeply betrayed

21
-Romance was nothing but a crazy dream after all!
-It never existed in the first place!

-That's it? PATHETIC!

-You lost to some other guy over the woman you liked and you've been taking it out on yourself!
-Wha-NO! NOT AT ALL!
-I'm not taking anything out on myself!!
-Loser!!

-Yeah, okay, forget about that and MAKE ME BACK TO NORMAL!
-Who are YOU to order ME around!? (small outside bubble: You're just a ship!)
-There she is

-I've been looking for you
-Princess

22
-Let us return to your home
-Princess Yuwaryet

-Who's he? And...princess??
-Ch! He found me already...

-YOU'RE A PRINCESS!?
-That's right

-It was obvious given the circumstances. (You really ought to watch more movies)
-Obvious from what!?

-Then this guy's...

-My
-Fiancé

-How good to see you again, princess

23 YARRRRR
-EEEH!? THIS THING IS!?
-HE'S HUGE! LIKE, CAN YOU TWO EVEN HAVE KIDS!?

-Fuh...having children is the least of my concerns
-What is most important is the unification of our planets

-My government is most pleased to offer our services in governing the princess' home

-Besides, there are countless means by which I can show her my tender care despite the size difference
above panel: Equivalent of a Barbie doll

-Geh...!

24
-Aw, tender care! What a nice guy.
-ARE YOU STUPID!?

-All he wants is to rule my planet!
-Once my purpose is served, who knows what he'll do!
-Eh!?

-I've been meaning to ask you for a while now,
-but who are you, earthling?

-Me? I'm--
-MY BOYFRIEND!!

-HAAAAAH!?

25
-And we're SOOOOO in love! You don't stand a chance! So shoo!
-HOLD IT. Dragging me into this is one thing, but there's NO CHANCE I'm playing boyfriend!
-We're so close, he knows the number of moles on my body!
-LISTEN TO ME!!

-Is that right?
-So primitive civilizations are even quick to seduce another's mate...

-Seize this wild barbarian!!
-Yessir!

-Here the come, Fuji! Take them out!
-Take them out!? I ain't no Gundam!!

-Then use your Rocket Punch!

-Eh!? You gave me one!?

26
-N...
-Nothing...happened...

-...oh, right...I didn't get around to the weapons systems yet...
-SCREW YOU!!
-MEANWHILE I'M MAKING AN ASS OF MYSELF WITH THAT CORNY POSE!

-Oh well...
-I guess we'll have to launch aga--

27
-W-
-what are you doing!? Let me go!!
-Apologies, princess, but it's dangerous. You need to get back.

-FUJI!

-STOP IT!!

-Look, stop!!
-I get it!! I give up!!

28
-I give up...
-I'll marry you

-Ah, you finally understand my feelings!

-Hey, WAIT!
-You're really okay with that!?

-It doesn't matter anymore
-I know it's too late for simple apologies,
-But I'm sorry. This was all because of my selfishness

-I knew all along there's no such thing as a random romantic encounter

-Forgive me

29
-LIFTOFF!

30
-Is she trying
-To make sure I get away safe?

31
-What is that alien thinking?

-First she goes and remodels by body,
-then she's covering for me...

-Just like...she was...
-Head in the clouds, always doing things at her own pace
-And although she'd always talk about romance, in the end she...

-NO

32
-What's the meaning of this?!
-The moment we return, we will hold our ceremony
-It's a precaution to stop anyone from interfering with our departure...

-CRUNCH

-whoops...

-Oh well...

-I can always buy a new one...

33
-She looked happy the last day I saw her...

-But Yuu...

-In the end, it doesn't matter how you meet the one for you!

-As long as spending time with that person brings you happiness,
-And you treasure that person's company, then that's all you need

34
-That wasn't
-the same kind of face!

35
-Shit...I'm starving...

-Kachin
-Reality is nothing like we hope for
-But

sfx bub - BASA (sound of something falling flat)

-Does that mean we should just accept it?
-Romantic encounters are nothing but a pipe dream?

no panel?: I'm going to show her...that they DO exist!

-Hey, I just bought this a while ago...
-Yuu, what're you doing shoving this thing in here...

-Because right now,
-I'M the only person on the face of the earth who can!

36
-As long as that person means more to you than the entire world,
-Then you've already found your once-in-a-lifetime chance!

37
-W-what's happening?! (small: He's got bread in his mouth!!)

-OPEN THE HATCH!

-...Fuji!?

-DON'T JUST STAND THERE, SHOOT HIM OFF!!
-We can't at this range!!

38
-LIFTOFF----!!

39
-Fuji...

-Yuu...

-WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? LAUNCHING ME AT POINT-BLANK RANGE? WHAT IF DIED!?
-It's not my fault! I said it unconsciously! (small: and don't go shorting my name!)

-Just who do you think you are

-Damaging my ship...
-abducting the princess...

-I'll end your life right here!!

40
-I wouldn't if I were you!
-What?!

-I've got enough speed and power to blow a hole in your spaceship's hull!
-If you eat one of my tackles directly, what do you think'll happen?
-Kuh...

-Go haul your otaku ass back to your home planet and strip barbie dolls for all I care!
(t/n - he says jenny dolls, which are the japanese barbies. look it up!)
-Why, YOU--!!

-Well!? I don't have all day!
-STOPSTOPSTOP!! MORON!!

-Eh!?

-You're...
-You're all out a fuel!!

41
-...ah
-...tehehe?

-GUH...
-FUJI!!

-That was quite a show, boy

-Damnit!

-It's our last resort
-I didn't want to have to use it, but...

42
-It's our only chance to escape from here

-Take this! It's a pill that'll allow you to travel faster than the 2nd cosmic velocity!!

-Again with that cosmic thingamajigy?
-In layman's terms, it'll give you way more energy than any ordinary food
-Oh, great! Give it here!
-HOWEVER

-This isn't the time for "however"! (small: besides, I doubt I'd understand what you had to say, anyway)
-AH!!

-Stop talking amongst yourselves!

-U--uwao....
-Aah...

-UWOOOOOOOA

43
-IT HURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTS!!!

-I was about to say "you'll transform, which is intensely painful"
-Tell me...sooner...
-Are you crying?

-W-what is that!?
-What are you!?!

-Boy, being your spaceship
-never amounts to any good...

44
-GRAVITON DRIVE, MAXIMUM OUTPUT!!

45
-LIFTOOOOOOOOOOOOOFF-----------!! (into page 44)

46
-Gosh, you're a complete wreck!
-Put yourself in my shoes, would you?
-99% of it was YOUR fault!

-...yeah, okay, maybe...

-But
-You're the only person who can fix me

47
-...The only person
-in the entire universe

-Because I'm your ship, after all

-WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?
-Sorry, I went a little overboard~

left: Fly, Foo Fighter! With the power of love! (t/n - it's corny, i know.)

=END=