Cyborg Grampa-G 26

With all the cyborgs running amuck in Japan, one tends to forget that there are scientific geniuses from all over the world...but when one actually shows up in Japan, he may be after something that's a tad...archaic!

Vol. 4: Plowing Towards Tomorrow!!
Chapter 26: Coming All the Way to Jipangu!
(TN: Though the kanji for the name obviously has the name as “Japan”, “Jipangu” is an old name Europeans in the West gave to Japan, as originally established on a map made by Marco Polo after his journey to and from China in the 13th Century. In more recent times, the Japanese have taken this reading and used it for their own purposes, usually as a means of an “archaic” name for their nation in popular media)

Author Comment:
Shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi.
Shi shi shi shi shi shi shi.
Shi shi shi shi shi shi shi shi.
Translation: (Cyborg G-chan concludes in this volume. Everyone who supported me until now, friends who have bought these comics and people who have helped with these manuscripts, thank you!!) Subtitles: Honorable Natsumi Toda (penname)

5.
Summary of Previous Volumes (character data the same):
My name is Ka-chan the scarecrow. My creator is the grandpa of the Kaizous. He is a genius scientist who, aiming for the greatest agriculture in the world, he modified himself into a farming-type cyborg and revived grandma. But, he’s also a genius at causing trouble. Every time his great enemy Sharekoube, who plans to take over the world, has a plan such as reviving the “Senile Monster Oldzilla” or break up Gantetsu and G-chan, everything in the neighborhood is utterly destroyed! But, after his troubles, he’ll run amuck happily plowing even today.

8.
Voice: HI—HI HI HI HI HI!!
Madman: I can already slowly see it according to my pl—ans! Hi—hi hi, in Jipangu, the nation of go—ld!!
(TN: The stretched words are this guy’s quirk, which I will be keeping)
Boy: Professor~~it’s best if we descend. You’ll catch a cold.
Professor: Ho—
Professor: I see it! That’s wh—at it is—Jipa~~ngu, the nation said to have everything, from building roofs to pillars, is gold!! Hi—hihi, this gold will be mi—ne!!

9.
G: HYO------
Sign: Itai Dentistry
G: THIS HURTS, YOU MONSTER!!
(TN: A bit of a weird pun: G’s first line is “this hurts”, which he says in Japanese as “itai”. And, using different kanji, the dentist’s name is also “Itai”)
Dentist: Gefu.
G: Is this fit for a dentist!
Dentist: It’s really not done by doctors recently!!
G: I’ll handle my own cavities by modification surgery!
G: Muuu……
Dentist: ……
G: Really! I’m not paying him!!
Boy: Well didn’t I tell you?
Professor: Geho geho

10.
Professor: I can’t relax on that, Sancho-kun! This is possibly the famous country of gold, Jipangu!!
Molo: My gre—at gre—at ancestor Marco Polo wrote that in the “Orient Information Record” that he le—ft! Hi—hi hi, with the scientific power of Omarko Molo, the No. 1 genius scientist of the West, all of the gold in this country will be mi—ne.
(TN: "Orient Information Record", or "Touhou Kenburoku", is the Japanese name for "Il Millione" (Italian for "The Million"), which is also known in English as "The Travels of Marco Polo". The book itself, written by Rustichello da Pisa originally in French based on accounts told to him by Polo while both were imprisoned, is a depiction of his journies through the Orient between 1271 & 1298. Though extremely popular in it's time, many of what was written in the book have been suggested either to be fabrications or just stories picked up by Polo by other travelers to the East besides him)
Sancho: You say that, but, professor, that book was written 700 years ago. The politics, business and science of Japan today…is said to be the top of the world~~
(TN: Well remember, this was 1989 so I really can’t say the same for at least the politics and business…)
Molo: Does the assistant think it’s good to defy the professor?
Molo: Well then, are you saying that my ancestor somehow lied, Sancho-kun? Go on with that nonsense and you’ll be turned to spaghetti and eaten!
Molo: I have a passion for gambling for gold…Sancho-kun, you should understand me too…
Molo: I am collection the world’s go—ld! And thus, I’ll end up with the Gold of Jipa—ngu!!

11.
Molo: A genius scientist like myself has personally modifi—ed into an invin—cible cyborg to destroy Japan and make the gold mine. Further, my entire body has the go—ld from every country of the wo—rld!!
Molo: This fork is the only thing not gold. The gold I steal from Jipangu will end up giving this fork gilded splendor and I can have my dream of eating spaghe—tti with it.
Molo: And then I’ll make a golden palace where everything will be go—ld!! At that time, you’ll be gold to—o, Sancho-kun.
Sancho: Huh!?
Molo: Now look, Sancho-kun!
Sancho: …
Molo: At the dazzling golden city!!
Molo: ……
Sancho: You said that……
Molo: IT’S NO~~~T!!

12.
Molo: No no no~~The—re’s no go—ld.
Sancho: Well you said it—
Molo: Ooh, that shining…Sancho-kun, descend, it’s go—ld!!
Molo: Oh~~!? A shining bald head~~
Molo: There is—n’t gold at a—ll. It should be hidden somewhe—re!!
Molo: Sancho-klun, if tha—t’s how it is, please sea—rch with the detector for the reaction of any little go—ld!!
Sancho: Am.
Molo: Oh—the—re’s a reaction alre—ady. As expe—cted from a device I ma—de!
Sancho: I made it.
Molo: Look the—re! It’s mini around that house, but there’s a reaction for go—ld.
G: Re—ally, I can’t do it with that quack! Its fine from the modification surgery on me…but my tooth is still throbbing…

13.
Kei: How can you get a cavity as a cyborg? Well you did eat nothing but youkan.
(TN: “Youkan” is a jelly dessert made of red beean paste, agar and sugar, sold in blocks and eaten in slices)
G: Quiet. I’ll distract myself by farming.
Molo: It’s this house~~the gold seems to be monopo—lized right he~~re. I thi~~nk I want to take it, even if I have to kill them if they resist.
Molo: Go—ld! Ha—hahaha, those who hide the go—ld will become spaghetti and ea~~ten.
Sancho: Please quiet down, Professor! Your eye color changes when it comes to gold…
Molo: That remi—nds me, we’ve eaten nothing since leaving Ita—ly.
Z: Ah—

14.
Kaizous: ……
Molo: That was extremely fantastic, mada—m. You’re a lifesa—ver. Spaghetti is my favorite fo—od.
Yuu: Well……
Molo: Sancho-kun, somewhere in this house is hidden the go—ld. We must move so we don’t reveal our true na—ture.
Sancho: To say that this country is the country of gold is easy, Professor~~
Eiichi: Omarko Molo, you say you’re a scientist but…have you come to Japan to sightsee?
Molo: Ye—s, that is ho—w we are.
Sancho: Sightseeing—
Molo: Actually we’re writing a new “Orient Information Record” now so we can introduce to Italy the culture of this Jipa—ngu. That’s why we should be pardoned as we look at the culture of Ja—pan!
Sancho: Eh--!?
Molo: When this book is finished, this family will be introduced to Italy…no, the whole world!
Eiichi: Th…that’s great—
Yuu: Ai, Kei…clean your rooms!
Ai & Kei: ……

15.
Molo: A Japanese father is a man with two eyes and one mo—uth. A Japanese mother is a woman with two arms and le—gs.
Sancho: Professor, they’re not aliens!
Ai: This is rea—lly annoying.
Kei: It’s because there isn’t a good self-declared genius scientist.
Molo: Hi—hi hi, we—ll then, they’ll have our faith and properly tell us where the go—ld is!
G: Hyo!? What is this old guy!?
Molo: That’s a cyborg like me, isn’t it!?
Sancho: There are cyborgs in Japan too…
Eiichi: G-chan! We’re going to be famous for being written in an “Orient Information Record”!
G: You locked in a tofu exam? I don’t listen to those stories!
(TN: The part with the “locked in a tofu exam” is actually spoken in Japanese as “Toufu no kenben rokku”. Tofu and “rokku” (or “lock”) are obvious, but “Kenben” is Japanese for “a fecal exam”. It was really hard to translate it and I couldn’t quite to it correctly)
Sancho: What did I say, professor? The technology of today’s Japan has become surprisingly advanced.

16.
Q: What, we have a foreign visito—r? It’s my turn.
G: Hyo!? Grandma!?
Molo: Oh—it’s a gei—sha! Magnifice—nt. Please write your address and phone number for my “Orient Information Reco—rd”!
Sancho: ……
Eiichi: I’ll take them too.
Yuu: Dear!!
Q: Shut up, I hate old men—
Molo: !?
Molo: Make a Japanese geisha angry and they become a gra—nny. And the elderly have steel bo—dies. They have said to be the oldest nation in the wo—rld.
(TN: Back then, as is now, Japan has gotten a reputation of having the highest longevity rate in the world)
Molo: BUT I CAN’T DO THIS FORE—VER. IF I DON’T LOOK FOR WHERE THAT GOLD IS QUICKLY…
Molo: Well then, everyo—ne, from what I’ve written of Jipangu, I must write about the go—ld.
Kaizous: Gold?
Molo: Well~~…where then are the golden buildings?

17.
Kaizous: Golden buildings? What is he…
Molo: Ho!?
“Surrounding Comment”: What is he…
Molo: You fools—it was exactly written in the “Orient Information Reco—rd”! Are you saying it was a lie--!?
Eiichi: These days, there isn’t anyone who believes that “Orient Information Record”…
Kei: That gramps is really suspicious.
Sancho: So why did you say it—
Molo: Aah, my gold city~~
Molo: No, there actually was a reaction to the gold in this hou—se!
G: HYO!!
Molo: Quietly get out the gold and you won’t be silenced by the Italian Golden Cyborg Baron---!!

18.
Kei: He…he’s a cyborg---!?
Eiichi: We’ve…been deceived—
G: Hyo—There’s a foreign cyborg--!!
Molo: Even if I’m a demon, if you can’t help me with where the gold is, I’ll find it myse—lf.
G: Mumumumu—
Molo: The gold his hidden somewhere on the body of that cyborg gra—mps!!
G: Hyo!?
Q: What, grandpa? You had that and kept it from me—
G: I didn’t know!!
Molo: My go—ld device wasn’t confu~~sed!! The go—ld will be mi—ne!

19.
G: You—If I say I don’t, then I don’t! An annoying gramps will face the justice of farming power—
Kei: O—K, G-chan has equipped his farming option! Go—G-chan!!
Molo: Ha~~haha, that’s a weird form—Hi—hihi, what is that shabby form!
Sancho: …
Molo: Look at m—e! I’m a shining Italian cyborg of beautiful gold! The history and tradition of the Eternal Capital of Rome speaks through this elegant bo—dy.
Molo: How’s this! This is the Trevi Fountain which throbs of the Greek Go—ds! From the top of my head to the tips of my toes, my body has an appropriate value from it’s arti—stry.
Molo: Ha—haha
Kaizous: Ha—haha
(TN: The “peeing boy” is not a reference to anything Italian but to "Mannekin Pis" (the Dutch name, also known as "Petit Julien" in French), a symbol of the city of Brussels in Belgium which is a statue of a small boy peeing into a nearby fountain)

20.
Molo: What’s s—o fu—nny! Take my Pizza-Pie Cutte—r!
Kei: Wha—He put cutlery in pizza--!!
G: You be~~ast. Japanese Senbei Cutters are more honorable than these things!
(TN: Senbei are a type of rice cracker eaten in Japan)
Molo: Uh~~Sancho-kun! Use the custom me~~cha!
Sancho: Ye…yes~~
G: What’s that?
G: Hyo!? I can’t move!!

21.
Molo: Ho—w’s tha—t!? It’s my Whi—rling Spaghetti Defense. If there’s something that isn’t known of spaghetti, it’s that nothing coils more beau—tiful! Further, these noodles are the ultimate hardness for spaghetti! It’s called Al Dente in Ita—ly.
G: Muu…
Kaizous: That thing will always be torn by farming power!
Molo: Sancho-kun, please explain.
Sancho: This Al Dente has a softness that’s soft on the outside, and holds a bit of toughness inside. This delicately balanced noodle is unperturbed by any power if bunched together.

22.
Molo: Next I’ll paralyze his taste with this espresso which is much bi~~~ter than coffee!
G: It’s bitter—
Molo: And if you don’t give me the gold, then I’ll take the gold by crunching your body with this “True Mouth” me—cha!
Kei: His body will be crunched--!?
Ai: That’s not calming—
Molo: Rea—lly, what is it doing eating spaghetti~~!?
SFX: Crunch
G: Hyo!?
Kei: You’ve really got problems…
Molo: Ah—no—ow—
Sancho: You understand……?
G: G-chan is revived!! How dare you do that to me! If you come to that, then I’ll show you the power of Japan!!

23.
G: I’ll paralyze your taste with Japanese umeboshi!!
G: I’ll paralyze your smell with Japanese miso!!
Molo: Ho—
G: I’ll paralyze your sight with Japanese onions!!
Molo: Ha—
G: I’ll paralyze your hearing with the Hannya Shingyou of a Japanese granny!
Q: (recites sutra……)
Molo: Japan only has these strong things---!!
G: I call it: Japanese Heart Sensory Crash--!!
Ai: Yes—he knows the power of Japan!!
Kei: --Do you have a reason for this?
Sancho: It’s fine…this always happens………
G: How’s that! The power of a Japanese farming cyborg! Realize this!!

24.
Molo: Hold o—n!! My Gold Detector had a strong reaction within your mou~~th!!
Molo: Go—ld! I’ve finally found it!! It was hidden within here!!
G: Hyo—
Molo: Give—me—it---!!
G: Hyo--!!
Molo: This is…this is go—ld!! Go…
Caption: GOLD TOOTH
Molo: The gold that I finally found coming all the way to Jipangu is this gold tooth…
Sancho: Why would it react to just that gold tooth?
Q: A cyborg’s uses a special gold for a strong biting power—
G: HYO—IT HURTS—

25.
Eiichi: Wha—G-chan’s raging---!!
G: It hurts—
Ai: Stop—you’ll destroy the house!!
Molo: Th…this vibration……….!?
Sancho: This is the famous Japanese earthquake……
Molo: Do earthquakes in Japan occur not by catfish but by the elde—rly!
(TN: There’s a Japanese myth that catfish cause earthquakes)
G: UNUNUNUNU
G: You, how dare you pull my gold tooth. My cavity is aching again!!
Ai: It’s hot. It’s really hot just being near G-chan…
Q: Kekeke, his anger from the pulled gold tooth and the heat of his toothache has his body temperature surpass 10,000 degrees~~
Kei: Ten thousand degrees~~~!?

26.
Molo: Ah—I’m trapped in a crack and I ca—nt ge—t ou~~t!!
Eiichi: Ooh, there, it’s evidently the Leaning Tower of Pisa!!
Q: Kekeke! Frankly, the heat is the methane gas, which is the energy source of grandpa, is already burning and a big explosion is occurring~~
Molo: What~~~
G: This is—
G: CERTAIN-KILL! EXPLODING G-MEGATON---!!!
Molo: Hya—he’s representing Japan as the nation of volcano—es. He’s a fireba—ll gra—ndpa---!!

27.
Molo: My gold body that I store from around the world has been ta~~ken!!
G: My 10,000 Degree G-Megaton has melted your gold!!
Kaizous: And didn’t you destroy our home on the side!!
Molo: Ho~~~!?
G: Thus, I got back my gold tooth!!
Molo: Ah~~my gold body became dentures…
Molo: …
Molo: I—f that’s what it is, then I’ll rebuild my body by gathering a large amount of gold teeth from the Japanese elderly and then challenge G-chan once aga—in!!
Sancho: Professor~~let’s go back to Italy already~~

28.
SECRET: G-CHAN / GRANDMA BOTS DESIGNS: SECRET FILE
Caption: (I was desperate)

TN: Let me start with this: for the most part the chapter was done already yesterday, but I didn't put it up until today because both laziness and because I had to make sure that I got a lot of the cultural references in this chapter correct. (there are quite a few, more so of Europe than of Japan) Secondly, I know I probably should be using the Italian name of the Marco Polo book with Molo's comments, but I just found it easier to leave it in the Japanese name just so it would be easy communication between him and the Kaizous. Now with that out of the way...this was a fun chapter. If anything, this chapter shows Obata finally finding flow and just having fun with his designs and concepts instead of just forcing things down that may just be disturbing. Molo in particular was a great design character, both in his normal and his cyborg form...and you really can sympathize with Sancho for putting up with a Kei-like existance with his grandfather. (there are a lot of weird elderly men in this series, I can't help that) I also like that the Kaizous actually seem more comfortable with the insanity for the most part this time around...well except G-chan destroying their home at the end but that's a typical comedic ending. And, for the last real time, we get to see Stronger G in action. I know people love seeing "Young G-chan", but this is a nice little usage with the super-heated version, particularly with how close we are getting to the end of the series. Makes you wonder what could have been at this point...