Hell Teacher Nube 6

The menace of youkai in Doumori has been a nuisance to it's residents, but some aren't as they seem. When one is discovered by a member of Nube's class, can he discover the meaning as to why it has appeared before he disappears!?

#6: The Kappa of the Parallel Bars

134.
Caption: THE MAIN CHARACTER THIS TIME: KURITA MAKOTO-KUN
(TN: Makoto is the last really notable “influence character” I should be getting into of Nube’s class considering he is the last of the major students we’ll be meeting at this time: the character’s look and name is derived from the kindergartener main character of “Makoto-chan”, a Shonen Sunday humor series by notable horror mangaka Kazuo Umezu. [More well known for series such as “The Drifting Classroom” and “Cat-Eyed Boy”] There is actually another horror reference tied to Makoto…but we won’t get into that until a later volume)
Caption: --After School—
Voice: Hyaa!
SFX: DOSUN!

135.
Makoto: Owow…
Makoto: I’m worried…tomorrow is the parallel bar test and yet…since I’m a shrimp, I can’t even do a pull-forward well enough!
(TN: Makoto at this point has this weird attribute of saying “-nora” at the end of his speech akin to a kid…but it really doesn’t translate well in English so I won’t be using it. As for “pull-forward”, it’s a translation of “sakaagari”, which is a term for “pulling yourself forwards with a forward circular movement)
Makoto: At this rate, I’ll be laughed at by everyone! I won’t be able to do this tomorrow!
SFX: PATA PATA PATA
Voice: Oya…? Someone is left practicing here…?
SFX: NITAA~~

136.
Makoto: WHAAAAAAA
Caption: The next day
Sign: STAFF OFFICE
Voice: AH—
Nube: It’s not here. I forgot to bring my jersey! This will be a problem having phys-ed classes today.
“Hairy”: Nueno-kun! If it’s fine, you can use mine.
Nube: Ah, Ishikawa-sensei, thank you very much.
Ishikawa: Are you on the parallel bars? Be careful—five people have gotten hurt on there this month.
Nube: Could it be a youkai?
Nube: --so then, let’s start the parallel bar test.

137.
Nube: First off, you’ll watch the model of your teacher!
Kyouko: Eh!? Teacher, you can do the parallel bars!?
Hiroshi: I thought you were a spiritualist nerd whose only gift is exorcisms.
Nube: You guys~~~!
Nube: I’ll show my abilities that had me called “Parallel Bar Nu-chan” in my student days! One-handed giant swing!
SFX: BUN! BUN!
Students: OOH~~!!
Nube: Tkachyov!
(TN: The “Tkachyov” is in reference both to a parallel bar move as Nube shows here as well as to well known parallel bar performer Alexander Vasilyevich Tkachyov who created it; well known for his gymnastic moves including winning a gold on the parallel bars at the 1980 Moscow Olympics)
Hiroshi: Amazing!
Kyouko: Cool--!
“Grubby”: Surprising! That teacher has this clear side to him!

138.
Nube: Fuffuffu…those eyes of my students watching me have changed to a look of respect!
SFX: BUN
SFX: SLIP
Nube: The grade-school teacher is a clear sportsman after all.
SFX: PASHI
Card: CABARET NURENURE
(TN: “Nurenure” is an onomatopoeia for wetness)
Nube: It’s the refreshness they haven’t felt a particle of with the scent of a dirtied adults.
SFX: PASHI
Card: BINSARO AMAZONESS
Nube: With this, I’ll surely grab the heart of my students!
Kyouko’s card: GAY BAR SHIRI NO ANA
(TN: “Shiri no Ana” = “Butt Hole”)
Hiroshi’s card: TELEPHONE CLUB SHIKOSHIKO (Reception 24 Hr: cute women)
(TN: “Shikoshiko” = “Stamp Stamp”)
Akira’s card: Burusera Shop AOI KAJITSU
(TN: “Aoi Kajitsu” = “Blue Fruit”; “Burusera”, or “Blue Sailor” as translated, is a shop where girl’s uniforms and underwear are sold to dirty old men)
Miki’s Card: SOAP AKANAMAKO
(TN: Miki’s card is a soapland, where women wash men with their own bodies; “akanamako” = “Red Sea Cucumber”)
Nube: FINISH!
SFX: BISHUTSU!
Nube: It’s done…beautifully…well students, accept me with warm applause…
SFX: SUTA!

139.
Caption: SCORN
SFX: BITSUU / JITO~~
Voice 1: Repulsive…he’s a man whose like a mass of sexual desires…!
Voice 2: Surely he’s watching our bodies and secretly craving them…
Voice 3: I can’t be taught by this teacher!
Nube: Wh…why!? I just did the parallel bars and yet~~!?
Kyouko: Here! They slipped out from the jersey!
Nube: Cabaret, gay bar, Burusera shop…WHAT ARE THESE~~~
Nube: It’s a misunderstanding—this jersey was borrowed from Ishikawa-sensei, so naturally these leaflets…
Student 1: He’s making it a person’s fault…
Student 2: On top of being lewd, he’s bent even in spirit!
Student 3: I don’t want to be like that adult!
Kyouko: It’s because you have a habit of forgetting your jersey!
Nube: We—ll, someday I’m sure they’ll understand.
Nube: Next: Kurita Makoto-kun.
SFX: KUSUN…

140.
Makoto: Teacher…would it be better to stop with the parallel bars after all?
Nube: Huh!?
Makoto: There was a kappa on the parallel bars…it appeared when I was practicing alone yesterday…since they may be cursed…
Nube: A…kappa on the parallel bars…!?
SFX; PU
Students: GYAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Hiroshi: Makoto~~~if you’re lying, then make a better lie~~
Hiroshi: In short, you can’t do the parallel bars and hate you’re ashamed? Really, nothing you could do…
Makoto: It’s not a lie!
Makoto: Well I don’t like the parallel bars, but I’m not a coward that would lie and sabotage this!

141.
Hiroshi: Generally these kappa come out of rivers and swamps…say something, teacher!
Nube: …Understood.
Nube: The parallel bars are unavailable immediately!
Hiroshi: Ara?
Students: EEH
Hiroshi: What, what, why!? You have a reason to believe that story?
Nube: On top of understanding that we have a hazard, I don’t have a reason to ignore it.
Nube: Starting today, all of you won’t go near the parallel bars!
Nube: A change in plans! Today’s phys-ed will be the marathon!
Students: Eh~~no way~!
SFX: POKA—N…
Signs: A KAPPA HAS EMERGED; UNAVAILABLE

142.
Voice: What’s~~the meaning of this, Nueno-sensei!
VP: You’ve selfishly banned usage of the parallel bars!
(TN: A bit of a note: the man to the right never gets a name but is identified later as the vice-principal of Doumori Elementary…so I really have nothing to hide or say about that)
Nube: Because a kappa appeared!
Bald Man: The PTA is in uproar!! Hurry and dismantle those signboards!
Nube: Five people who used it this month got hurt! I’m certain something is there!
SFX: PERA
Bald Man: How is there a connection of a kappa and the parallel bars!
Nube: UH!
Nube: What is this: a kappa can fly in the air with farts? Uumu! If I could do this, then even a hell teacher is no match for it!
Book: A GOOD CHILD’S YOUKAI ENCYCLOPEDIA
Bald Man: Ka~~that’s stupid; can someone fire him!!
Voice 1: Nube-sense believes in the kappa story!?
Voice 2: Seems stupid…how can a kappa be a living thing beyond fantasy?
Voice 3: He’s fully deceived by Makoto’s lie!
Voice 4: That Nube…he’s softhearted…
Makoto: Teacher…
Caption: --LUNCH BREAK—

143.
SFX: KURIRIN!
Nube: Hmm…
Nube: Understood: it’s directly beneath the parallel bars…hmm…it does stink.
Makoto: Teacher…
Nube: N?
Makoto: Enough already…no one believes me at any rate and I’m just being stupid…This will end if I say the mere words “I lied”…
Nube: But did you really see it?
Makoto: Eh? Uh…yes, seems I did but if I did, wouldn’t you abject, huh?
Nube: When people say something, it’s better for them to bring their will out to what is thought as correct! Even so, a person who makes a complaint thrust with a direct proof, saying it with gall!
(TN: Nube uses an expression here that Makoto said the kappa matter as “gyafun”, which is a term that stands for “not speaking out when being talked down upon”. Thus, the “saying it with gall” shows that Makoto spoke his mind honestly to a person like Nube when he was being seen respectably, not as just some small liar like the rest of the class see him now)

144.
Makoto: Teacher…
Nube: Uo! It should stink; I stepped in poop!
Hiroshi: I can’t stand this: the soccer club’s meeting dragged on. I’ll be late for afternoon class!
Voice: Come—out! Kappa--!
SFX: DOSUN DOSUN!
Makoto: Though teacher is doing his best this far, can’t it possibly be just me that can! I’ll lure out the kappa and proving that I wasn’t lying!
SFX: DOTAN DOTAN
Makoto: It did happen at the parallel bars yesterday, you came out! If you surely did, then come out again! Come out, come out kappa!
SFX: DOSUN / ASSA… / BATAN
Makoto: Come out—
SFX: DON DON DON
Hiroshi: Has his head gone mad!? I have to notify teacher.
Makoto: UWAA—

145.
SFX: ZABAA
Makoto: GYOOOOO

146.
Makoto: UAAAAA
SFX: ZUBUZUBUZUBU
Hiroshi: Makoto~~!
SFX: DATSU!
Hiroshi: Teacher—Makoto’s been taken by a kappa!!
Nube: What!?
Hiroshi: Teacher, where are we going here…
Nube: An old unused well in the rear garden!
Hiroshi: An old unused well…!?
Sign: DANGER! (Don’t come near)
Nube: I knew it with my dowsing* but…there’s an underground water vein that continues from this old well to beneath the parallel bars!
*A method of searching for water veins and reefs using divination rods.
(TN: There actually is a bit more on dowsing in a later chapter)
Nube: And this water vein is connected to Myoujin Swamp which is behind the school; the kappa is the master of the swamp!

147.
Hiroshi: The…the master of the swamp is interfering with the parallel bars somehow!!
Nube: I don’t know!
SFX: ZABU ZABU ZABU
Nube: Kappa were originally water gods, but came into ruin and changed into youkai…their spiritual power is formidable, just from formerly being gods!
Nube: We’re here! This is beneath the parallel bars!
Hiroshi: Wh…what is this wide hole!!
Nube: The current of underground water cut into the stone bit by bit over the long years and months. It’s because this area has what’s called Kantou Loam Soil, a volcanic ash soil that crumbles easily…
(TN: A bit of a geology lesson: loam is a soil composed of an even concentration of sand, silt and clay that is usually used for gardening due to its factors including more nutrients than a sandy soil, better drainage than silt and easier to till than clay. Kantou Loam is an actual existing type of this soil that combines in the volcanic ash spewed out of the island’s volcanoes)

148.
Nube: Pay attention! We don’t know where the enemy is hiding!
SFX; GOGOGOGO
SFX: GRAB!
Hiroshi: !
Hiroshi: WAAAAA!
Nube: Hiroshi!!
Kappa: Shuru
SFX: BIYORRORO~~N!
Nube: !!
Hiroshi: TEACHER—
Kappa: Nita—
Nube: …This guy…
Nube: Former water god that has fallen…I thought I would settle this by paying respects and talking, but if you’re like that, then I can’t forgive you! I’ll tear you limb-from-limb with the Oni no Te—
SFX: PAKI…PAKI…PAKI…
Voice: WAIT!

149.
Makoto: The kappa isn’t a bad youkai!
Hiroshi: Makoto! Are you safe?
Nube: Wh…what do you mean!?
Makoto: That kappa is protecting us! FROM THAT!
Nube: AN UNEXPLODED BOMB! This thing was…beneath our campus!
SFX; DOSUN / PARA / DOSUN… / PARAPARA…

150.
Nube: ! Above it the parallel bars…the ground is brittle and will come to easily crumble even with a bit of vibration…it will explode!
SFX: DOSUN! (ZUZUN)
Nube: No time anymore…! It’s sink-or-swim! Namu Daiji Daihi! Oni sealed by Byakue-Kannon, show me…
Nube: YOUR POWER---!!
Nube: This hand is a spiritual body! It breaks through the transient world! Go from here---!!
Boy 1: WHAA!
Boy 2: A WRIST!

151.
Voice 1: Run—
Voice 2: A monster has appeared—
Nube: NAMUSAN!
SFX: ZUZU…
SFX: CLICK!
SFX: GOBO
Sign: MYOUJIN SWAMP: DON’T SWIM! KAPPA ARE HERE!
SFX: ZABA—

152.
SFX: Ha ha ha
Makoto: Y…you really saved us!
Nube: Well, we were pulled and taken here by him.
Makoto: You faked that on the parallel bars so you could protect the children from that bomb. You are a good youkai…
SFX: NYARI~~
SFX: CHAPON!
Narrator: And so…
Kyouko: Since the parallel bars were destroyed, we’re doing ping-pong in it’s place, Hiroshi!
Makoto: IT’S MY SPECIALTY!
Hiroshi: Teacher! A tengu has appeared at the ping-pong table! Stop it—huh!
Sign: Hiroshi-kun is weak in smaller sports.
Nube: A person like you...
(End of Vol. 1)
(TN: This is merely the end of the continuity stuff this volume, a special chapter will follow next)

153.
NUBE-SENSEI’S GREAT YOUKAI ENCYCLOPEDIA

6. Kappa

It is said many youkai were once gods, but lost the faith of the people and were degraded due to the entrance of imported religions like Buddhism. The kappa is one of them, being an object of worship by the people as a water god. Also, they like live in rivers and swamps and taking part in sumo. The bones of both of their arms are connected, drawing in one arm and stretching the other arm. They’ll die with the breaking of the dish on their head. They draw out the shirikodama…there are a great number of legends that remain. Since Japan is a country with many rivers, we come to have legends of kappa.

These kappa usually have the form that’s like a turtle with a dish put on its head, but this model what’s familiar in the history textbooks is an amusing theory spoken by Jesuit missionary Francis Xavier. Long ago, when he was propagating his religion in China, the Chinese misunderstood him as a god of water who had come from across the sea. Indeed, the form of the missionary with a dish on his head was the splitting image of a kappa. Afterwards it was communicated to Japan and that’s the reason there was a unification of the image of a kappa to its present form afterwards.
It wasn’t definite which form kappa were in before, but since they had a spiritual body without form, this form was an infinite variety due to the preconceptions of people who saw the form. Kappa are allies and enemies of humans, changing by area and said to be being that are by the preconceptions of people that it meets. So then, later!


(TN: A few weird comments in conjunction to the notes:
1. A “shirikodama” is a ball kept in the anus that is drawn out by kappa from people to "feed upon"
2. Francis Xavier is a Spanish missionary, founder of the “Society of Jesus” (also known as the Jesuits) and particularly well known for his missionary work in Asia, including Japan)

TN: You do have to wonder how those types of bombs get placed in such a sensitive location...or who left it there: the US or the Japanese. Considering how several people (Nube, Hiroshi and Makoto in particular) nearly got blown up thanks to it, at least there was the water veins to escape through. But of course, the kappa is probably one of the first youkai that seems to appear and show less of the menace that they pose to the people around them...even if they have to be a menace to be heard. Regardless, this chapter for the most part was a cute introduction to Makoto's character, bringing one who sort of will get quite a bit from here on out not just due to his shortness...but due to his other child-like attributes soon to emerge. While not as important as Makoto, this is also the first appearance of Ishikawa-sensei...and considering that was his outfit Nube borrowed, it isn't a very good introduction. (on whose part, I can't tell since...Nube and Ishikawa are going to probably take punishment for what they exposed 5th graders to) BTW: we do have one more character in the class we're going to be introduced to in the next regular chapter...but we won't get to it next time, because what's left in vol. 1 is the second (yes, that's what I said: second) pilot of Nube, where some fans of the anime may see a few familiar things we haven't had yet...