Gintama 380

Lol, not Mantama, not Kintama, but Gintama. I was this close to making ANOTHER category for Mantama. THIS CLOSE.



???: You know, a boy's sword isn't a thing that can be simply kept in his pants...

It's a blade that should rest in the scabbard known as a girl.

(TN- …..That's a great start Sorachi-sensei. How old are those two? Nine?)

(Side text- Sorachi-sensei's hotly anticipated new serial begins!!)

???: Sadly I can't be the scabbard for your sword...

But you'll definitely meet a girl out there, somewhere who will be your match.

I'm sure you'll find her and live happily.

Your beloved girl.

???: Uuuh, Tokiko-chan..

(Sfx- Gusu sniffle)

???: I don't want anyone other than you....please, don't die....

Tokiko: ...You dummy...

Okay then, lets make a promise.

If my fate changes, I’ll definitely return to your side.

Which means of course, you'll have to look for me.

???: Okay. It's a promise.

I'll find you for sure...

My most precious scabbard.....

002

MANTAMA
SORACHI HIDEAKI
First counter: A man's sword.

(TN- Mantama means...well...female genitalia. Or well...a man and woman's...things. I swear it's like the gorilla doesn't even care if the PTA bitches at him.)

003

{The country of love.}

{The times when that title was once used to describe our country are long past.}

{Twenty years ago out of the blue a sudden mysterious growth came from the underground.}
{Simultaneously with the appearance of this mysterious growth came a virus that would cause the sword between men's legs to rot and fall off.}

{As such, the country where love once ran rampant, where men and women conversed endlessly...}

{Became more or less a den of complaints from women and woman-ish organisms.}

{And the words once exchanged between men and women...}

Everyone: Holy cow~

{Was reduced to this.}

{During this era....}

{There is only one resistance to the virus.}

{A soldier with a robust sword made of pure steel....}

{Known as the last samurai, his name is...}

004

{Sakata Kintoki.}

{Yes, he is truly the last man on earth. Humanity's final male.}

{The responsibility to satisfy all the women on earth is his and his alone.}

{I continue to look for my scabbard even today....}

Girls: Good morning Sakata-kun! Let's go to school together!

Hey Sakata-kun! I made a lunch....do you think we could eat it during class break?

What are you going on about?! Sakata-kun already promised to eat with me during our afternoon recess!

Don't be stupid, he promised to hang out with me!

Kintoki: Sorry ladies, but I recall making a promise to no one.

I have a previous engagement.

The likes of which was made long before you were born.

Girl: Um...what does that mean?

{Just how much time has flowed between us as I continue to search for you?}
005

{To keep our promise, I've modified my sword so that it's fullmetal.}

(TN- You expected me NOT to use that joke?)

{I stopped being human so that I could continue being a man.}

{But soon all of mankind will cease to exist...literally.}

{I've gone and become the very last man on the face of the earth.}

{But even with that I still await your return...for you to be my scabbard.}

{I will keep my sword from breaking.}

{Even if you were reborn as a cockroach...}

{You're still my most precious bottom half.}

???: Oh no! I just transferred into this school today, and I'm already late!

(Sfx- Dath dash)

???: Ah! Watch out, Sakata-kun!!

(Sfx- Doshhiin thooom)

Girl: Owie..

Are you okay, Sakata-kun?!

006

Tokiko: Whoopsie, I fell over!~

(Sfx- Gonn tap)

Tokiko: Sowwy, You aren't hurt are you?

{N—no way...}

{It's really her?!}

{It's really...}

Kintoki: She's...changed her fate...

My scabb--
Tokiko: Um...excuse me..

You're talking about a scabbard or something....

But...

That's my PET bottle.....

(Sfx- Zuboriii drooop)

007

{D—dammitttt!!!}

Girl: Sakata-kun's crotch -the last of it's kind in the whole world has a PET bottle stuck on it!!

???: What is it? What's the ruckus?

(Sfx- Uhoo)

Girl: Goriko-sensei, Sakata-kun's crotch is having a crisis!!

Goriko: Thi---this is a crisis indeed!

If he loses the one thing that gives him an identity in this manga, Sakata-kun will lose his role and drop into obscurity.

Kintoki: Sensei, I'd appreciate it if you didn't equate the status of my crotch to my humanity.

Goriko: Before this mess gets any worse, lets take you to the infirmary.

Here we go.

Kintoki: Sensei!! Is this really the best way to handle a crisis down there?!

Don't shake it around so much!!

(Sfx- Meki meki grind grind)

???: Look out! That ball is headed right our way!!

Goriko: HMPH!

(Sfx- Gakooon WHOOM)

Kintoki: Sensei!! I need to go to the nurse, pleaaaaaase!!!

008

(Sfx- Paaan twop)

???: Ah, thanks a lot Sensei!

Kintoki: Hold oooooooon!!!

That's not a baseball, but a completely different bat and ball set completely!!

???: Okay~ Here I go!

(Sfx- Zuzazazaaaah ddsssssh)

Kintoki: Hold the phone!!

That's my ball and bat set, dammit!!

???: Oh good! Sakata-kun made it just in time!!

???: Kickoooooff!!!

(Sfx- Goooh THOOK)

Kintoki: ARE WE NOT PLAYING BASEBAAAALLL!?

(Sfx-Zuzooooh Whooooom)

(Sfx- Doooon thoom)

Girls(?): She shattered the goal and smashed through the school building!! Just what kind of strength does that girl have?!

Kintoki: AUUUUUUGHHH!!!

MY SWOOOOOORD!!

???: What is this?!

It flew into the arts room....

(Sfx- Gogogogo rmmmble)

Kintoki: Ah! They're okay!!

009

???: Though the bottle had a broken screw in it...

So I took it upon myself to fix everything.

Bon voyage!!!

(Sfx- Buru buru shiver shiver)

Girls: Sakata-kun's crotch has gone bon voyage!! Before he knew it, the art room turned it into a botttle ship in an instant!!

(Sfx- Kin kon kan kon ding dong ding dong)

Teacher: All right, I'm taking attendance.

{At long last...}

{I found her..the one who changed her fate to become my scabbard.}

{My scabbard is this PET bottle...}

{It almost looks as if my sword is off to the New world...}

{At this rate there's no way...}

{I can't possibly be with her...}

(Sfx- Garara clatter)

???: Excuse me.

010

Goriko: Hey, what are you doing?

Being late on the day you transferred in...

???: I'm sorry!

Ahem! Once again....

I'm going to be transferring into this school starting today.

I'm so sorry for being late.

I know you've been looking for me.

(Sfx- Gotoh shfft)

Tokiko: But congratulations...

You've finally found what you've been seeking.

011

Tokiko: I'm sorry...

That you've...

Had to wait.

(Sfx- Pota pota drip drip)

Kintoki: yan..

TOKIKO-CHAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!

012

(Sfx- Gofuuuuh THOK)

(Sfx- Kara kara clatter clatter)

Tokiko: Don't start crying now....

We promised after all...

(Sfx- Biribiri riprip)

Tokiko: That we'd...

(Sfx- Meki meki meki ripriprpirip)

Tokiko: Definetly meet again.

(Sfx- Basasaaah wafff)

013

Gintoki: Once again, I'm the new transfer student...

Sakata Gintoki.

(Sfx-Dooooon dooom)

Gintoki: Hey now, what's with that face?

Dude, did you really forget our promise?

(Sfx- Gata gata clatter)

???: That's not nice, you can't just forget us.
???: No matter how much we forget..

(Sfx- Zucha fwiff)

???: How many times we get separated..

(Sfx- Fuh wft)

(Sfx- Gash tppt)

???: We'd find each other again.

014

Everyone: Right?

Gin-san.

(Sfx- Bahhhn fwaff)

Gintoki: Thems the breaks bro-man.

Sorry for just ridin' up and stealing your protagonist thunder...

But this 'Mantama'...

Is your grave site.

015

(Sfx- Gagooon THOOOOM)

(Sfx- Bikibiki cracklecrackle)

(Sfx- Baaaaariiin dsssssssh)

(Sfx- Para para clatter clatter)

016

Tama: How did your ten minutes in the spotlight taste?

Or was the flavor of taking others precious things more to your liking?

Everyone...

Has taken theirs back.

Kintoki: I see.
So the world I was in up until now was one you created Tama....

So you made this farce up for them.

Gengai: We opposed your function by teaming up and riding against it.

Everyone broke through your brainwashing by using another brainwashing.

Kintoki: So the Kintoki before me had all of it's memories erased and transferred?

So when they took my explosive hypnosis wave they managed to retain everyone's memories.

Gengai: Not really...those guys didn't even need all of that.

It seems that they all just gathered together...

And their tenacity gathered in one place managed to forcefully stop the wave.

017

Gengai: Kintoki...You know people's bonds are...

Way different, way deeper than memories or something that can be manipulated.

(Sfx- Gahh wfft)

Gengai: Although you took plenty, that was the one thing you couldn't take...and that is what lead to your downfall.

Gintoki: Tama, I already killed this joker once....

So I'll leave you to finish taking out the trash.

It's up to you if you want to grill or fry him.

(Sfx- Zuazaah sfft)

Shinpachi: Tama-san! Please reconsider!

Kagura: For us, you can let him off the hook, yes?

Shinpachi: After all, we were the ones who asked for him to be created in the first place.

Kagura: We did not know he would brainwash everyone. But it is us who gave him strength from the start!

If we are to repair his head, he will be better off, yes?!

Shinpachi: We'll take him with us and gather everyone to bow for forgiveness if that's what it takes...
So please!! Forgive him! Forgive us, Gin-san! Tama-san!

Tama: That's what they seem to want...

What should we do?

018

Kintoki: You should kill me.

Because next time, I will crush you Gintoki.

This time I won't try to tamper with the engraving of you that people have within their memories...

But your soul is a different matter.....I'll crush that engraving your friends have in their souls of you and your bonds...and reap the seat of protagonistdom.

Gintoki: Is that so?

Awwright.

I'll be waiting.

Tama: Then, let us go everyone.

Kintoki: Hey! Where are you going?

Tama: You...

You don't seem to have realized it yet....

But...

We've already been dyed completely silver.

Kintoki: Wh..

What are you blabbering on about?!

My golden hue isn't some trashy color!! I'm Sakata Kintoki dammit!!

Gengai: I see. Then how about you use that golden color to spruce up our place for starters?

(Handwritten- Eh?)

Gengai: Take a good look at them Kintoki...he ain't a perfect hero by any means..

But there's no such thing as a person that can do everything by themselves. But you know, that imperfection is...
(Handwritten- Gin-san~!)

019

(Big banner- GINTAMA)

Everyone: WELCOME HOME!!!

Gengai: That imperfection...

Is what makes him an unparalleled protagonist.

Lesson 380: I'm back.

(Side text- Welcome back Gin-san!!)

GINTAMA LESSON 380.............END.