Gintama 486

And even after running from this thing for two days straight, I still finish it before midnight on Thursday. Either I'm getting better nope or perhaps I've been translating Sorachi so long that I'm becoming him.



???: Heeeeyaaaah!!!
(Sfx- Paaan *smack*)
(Side text- In a flash!!)
GINTAMA
Shinpachi: That’s no good. You have to put your back into it.
Even if you were to attack me like that one hundred times I, Shimura Shinpachi would easily avoid all of them.
Listen up! Before you do anything else you should commit the strength of your body’s core to your very consciousness!!
Students: Yessir!!
Shinpachi: That axis in your body is what controls all of your points of movement. If it is warped or unable to move in any way then you won’t be able to draw out your true strength.
Now that you have the foundation I want a thousand more swings!!

002
Students: Sei!
Sei!!
Shinpachi: Hey Nagabuchifushi!! You can do more than that!!
Students: Sei!!
Sei!!
Shinpachi: That’s right! You! Move your rudder more!!
Listen up! I’m not talking about swinging with your body, but with your heart as well! Flimsy people can break too!!
This isn’t about swinging a sword around! If that’s all you’re doing you’ll never get any stronger!!
I want to hear it from you all!!
Why are you seeking strength?!
Why did you come to this dojo?!
Tae: Everyone’s putting their spirits to work aren’t they?
How about a little break?
(Sfx- Kuwaaaaaaaah *roaaaaaaaar*)
Students: It’s macadamia chocolate tiiiiiime!!!

003
Tae: Now, now. No need to push! Everyone line up and you’ll get a turn…
Dude: Awwright! I got me some chocolate!! Now I can take my ass home!!
We don’t need you now that we got our chocolate!
Actin’ all high and mighty…do you think you’re hot shit today brat?
(Sfx- Pehh *spit*)
GINTAMA
Lesson 486: There are two types of people in the world. That is, people who yell their secret moves before using them, and people who do not.
SORACHI HIDEAKI
Shinpachi: Hajime-nii’s support…
Allowed us to finally reopen the Dojo…and for that I’m greatful…but..
(Panels: You’ve gotten strong//Shinbou Tae-chan//Can re really get Macadamia nuts)
Shinpachi: But the students we have are ignoring learning the sword arts..
(Handwritten- Excuse me, but I heard youse guys are giving out chocolate here and stuff?)
Shinpachi: And we’re only getting mobs of guys gathering for Macadamia chocolate here.
Which y’know, I’d be fine with really…
(Handwritten- Hey!! Didn’t I tell you you can’t just hijack our house?!)
Shinpachi: But those very same guys are turning our home into their bedroom and we’re having to clean them up.

004
Shinpachi: I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!
HOW IS THIS A DOJO FOR SWORD TRAINING?! ISN’T THIS JUST A SHELTER FOR THE HOMELESS?!
Kyuubee: I loved training my swordplay quite a bit as child.
When I swung my bamboo blade it felt like I was in a dream world…but I guess not everyone feels the same way.
I apologize. Maybe the way I teach swordplay isn’t good enough..
Shinpachi: What are you saying?! Having a genius of the Yagyuu-style come every so often to lecture is great!! We should really be apologizing to you!!
The one who’s at fault here is me…I guess using chocolate to lure students here to begin with was a bad plan.
But it’s not like we have money…and if there’s some way for father’s swordplay to remain on this world it would be wonderful…or so I thought…
Tae: Shin-chan…
Perhaps you’re just thinking too hard about this.
See? Look over there.
(Sfx- Hah hah!!)
Tae: One of the lecturers that we called here might only be here temporarily but the students seem to be having fun.
Shinpachi: Y—you’re right!! Who could it be?!
Tae: I understand the desire to protect this sword art from being lost, and that’s wonderful…
But what we should prioritize is ensuring that everyone enjoys practicing swordplay.
If they enjoy swordplay then they’re more likely to treasure it.
Shinpachi: That’s true…I’ve only been thinking of how to keep our style alive…
But perhaps I forgot what’s really important…

005
Gintoki: Okay. Now all of you get in formation…
And let me see what you’ve got.
Hobos: KA~ME~HA~ME~
Shinpachi: THIS HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH OUR SWORD STYLEEEEEEE!!
What the hell are you doing in someone else’s dojo?! Who said you could start teaching the Turtle hermit style?!
Gintoki: Oh if it isn’t Coach Shimura…still swinging the sword in that profoundly boring way?
See if you bore the newbies they’re less likely to give a damn about the fundamentals.
If you want to get people interested in swordplay, then you need to start off by teaching them a flashy super secret move.
(Handwritten- Haaaaah!!)
Shinpachi: But secret moves and swordplay have nothing in common!! You can’t even do any moves like that!!
Kagura: Coach Sakata!! I think I feel something coming out! Can you see it?
(Handwritten- Kamehamehaaaaaaa!!)
Gintoki: Yup I can see it. Okay, how about you move on to training for the Kaiouken next?
Shinpachi: OF COURSE SHE CAN’T!! DO YOU GUYS WANT ME TO KILL YOU SO YOU CAN GO TO KAIOU STAR?!
(TN- All of the DBZ references in the world. Even right down to dying, which Goku had to do to learn the Kaiouken. Which means ‘Boundary King fist BTW.’)

006
Shinpachi: Knock it off already guys!! IF you keep this up our dojo is going to be a mess in a hurry!! Please don’t do this anymore!!
(Handwritten- Go hoooome!! This isn’t the turtle training dojo!!)
(Sfx- Soro soro *saunter*)
Kagura: Aw. Just when we were having fun, yes?
Kyuubee: Mmm…It might be a mess but maybe there’s something to it…
Shinpachi: What’s that?
Kyuubee: A secret special move.
It’s true the foundations are most important, but you can’t deny the importance of being able to get through plain and difficult training.
If there’s one pointer…an index for them to start efforts from ---even if it is using a move such as this then they might be more likely to change and stick around.
Shinpachi: But a secret move….I don’t think our style has…
???: Never say never.
I happened to be in search of Otae-san’s things while under this cellar…but,
Instead I found this thing.
Shinpachi: Um what I’m going to need you to do is not pop out of places like that before looking for anything.
Tae: This couldn’t be…
The Tendoumushin hi-ougi scroll?
Shinpachi: Hi-ougi?
Tae: When father was struck with sickness, he wrote these before he died.
He knew that you’d inherit the dojo someday Shin-chan, and wanted you to use this in order to grow strong. I thought the debt collectors had taken this before but it appears they didn’t.

007
Kyuubee: Th—then, that scroll has the hi-ougi for the Tendoumushin style written in it?
Gintoki: Hey Patssan, you’re making me do this when you had a secret move this whole time? That’s low bro.
Tae: Shin-chan…now’s the time.
For you to inherit the final moves that father left you.
The Tendomushin style hi-ougi…
And it’s name is…
‘Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night Raijin’s special Ultra Miracle Super Mario Brothers second edition Luigi’s revenge directors cut’.
(TN- I am not even going to START trying to name all the kanji Sorachi phonetically butchered to make that work.)
Shinpachi: Father…
THAT’S TOO LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!!

008
Shinpachi: It sounds like he was trying to convey something to us but it’s far too loooong!! How am I even supposed to remember this?! It’d be a miracle if I even remember half!!
‘Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night Raijin’s special Ultra Miracle Super Mario….’
Before I could even finish saying the attack name, the enemy would have already slain me!!
(Sfx- Zubaaaahhh *bloorsh*)
Kagura: Is there an unbreakable rule that you have to say the secret move’s name before using it?
Kyuubee: Jump pretty much mandates it. Moreover it’s the move his father thought of before he died. I believe it would be better that he say it.
That is if he can say it before the enemy slays him.
Shinpachi: What’s the deal with this suck special move?!
Kyuubee: If it were me and the Yagyuu’s special moeve, I would have a move that no one would want to say too loudly.
Man***kyoutentsugan!!
And there would be a ‘bleep’.
(Sfx- Kaaahh *fweeem*)
Shinpachi: WHERE WOULD THE BLEEP BE COMING FROM?! AND QUIT TRYING TO START MISUNDERSTANDINGS!! MORE LIKE, COULD YOUR LEFT EYE ALWAYS DO THAT?!
(TN- Took me a while to figure this one out since I loathe the series it comes from, but I’m sure this is a reference to Naruto’s Mangekyou sharingan. It just has different kanji and pronounciation.)
Kondo: My style would have an ougi named Tamakongou gekiisai sandatsdzuki. But for the sake of brevity I would shorten it to…
Tamakin-san.
And call it that.
Shinpachi: YOUR WHOLE DAMN EXISTANCE NEEDS TO BE BLEEPED OUT!!
(TN- Tamakin is short for balls, but Kondo’s whole attack is…again a lot of kanji put together. It does literally mean Many demon goldenization shattering three way pierce though.)

009
Gintoki: I think that actually works. I mean shortening it…it’s long as hell to write as is.
See what I’m pretty sure your pops ment to convey to you is the move ‘Amakakeru megane no hirameki.’
Shinpachi: And where on earth is that written there?! What does Megane no hirameki mean?!
(TN- This one’s a Kenshin move. What it means in that cannon is ‘Flash of the Heavenly Flying Dragon’ or Amakakeru Ryu no Hirameki’ But Gintoki’s version means ‘Flash of the Heavenly Brilliant Glasses.’)
Kagura: Then if we bleeped some of it out and left Amakakeru **** no hirameki that would be fine yes?
Shinpachi: WHAT’S THE POINT OF HIDING THAT PART?! IT’S BASICALLY FULL ON INFRINGEMENT NOW!!
Tae: Then how about this?
Shinpachi: ******************
(Sfx- Hah hah)
Tae: That should be fine right?
Shinpachi: SISTEEEEEEER!! IF I SAY THINGS THAT CAN’T BE BROADCAST ON AIR THEN I JUST LOOK LIKE A PERVERT!!
We’ve got no time to dilly-dally on such things.
The true problem here is what kind of move should this ougi be? I believe we should come to an understanding of that first.
Gintoki: Yeah, we should check that out first Pattsan.
With a name like that, I can’t imagine it’d be easy to use.
Shinpachi: Um…
{‘Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night (Short version) is…}
Shinpachi: If it’s that much of a pain in the ass to write don’t name it that to begin with!!
{The Tendoumushin’s strongest and deepest hi-ougi…and I am passing it down to you my only son.}
{This is a move that no one else must know of.}
Shinpachi: Sorry but the cat’s out of the bag.
{The reason for this is that Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night (Short version) I a move with enough power to change the very fabric of the world’s truth itself.}

010
{Of course this means that this move cannot be entrusted to shoe who do not foster a strong heart and seek strength.}
{The forces of evil must not be permitted to get their hands on this move….you must work hard and strive to protect it.}
Shinpachi: The—the move of the Tendoumushin style hi-ougi is that important…?
I—I wonder if I’ll be able to use it…?
{Here is the hi-ougi itself, recorded in its entirety.}
(Scroll- The way to produce the secret move// After breaking through the enemy’s defense…}
Shinpachi: What is this secret code looking thing?
Kondo: Looks like you’re supposed to hit the control pad down, then to the side…and after that hit the ‘K’ button.
Shinpachi: ISN’T THIS THE COMMAND FOR A FIGHTING GAME?!
WHERE’S THE CONTROL PAD?! WHAT’S THE ‘K’ BUTTON?! YOUR SON DOESN’T HAVE THAT BUTTON DAMMIT!!
Gintoki: No I think I get it. Yeah he explained it in a crappy way, but I believe if you think of your object rather than yourself here it’s all too easy to understand.
Most likely the control pad going down is your sword. Which would explain the ‘K’ button for ‘Ken’ or sword.
You’re supposed to take the sword out of it’s sheathe in one go, and move as you unsheathe it.

011
Gintoki: In short, after the enemy attacks you’re supposed to draw your blade as a counter. That’s the Tendoumushin style hi-ougi.
Shinpachi: Why are you able to understand this retarded secret scroll so well?
Gintoki: It’s ‘cause I have to utilze a hi-ougi to steal pudding in the middle of the night. My move happens to utilize the Down, left, right and (P)unch buttons together.
Shinpachi: What’s the meaning of relating your crappy ougi with the one left to me by my father?!
Kagura: My hi-ougi known as the pudding counter….
Uses the same buttons….Down, left, right and (p)udding.
Shinpachi: What’s the P button for?! Is it for punching or pudding?! Make up your minds idiots!!
Tae: Shin-chan, If you’re not careful you might mistake the (K) button and the (K)ato-chan button and your 70th birthday might end up looking like this.
Shinpachi: The (k)en button is that sorta ‘ken’?! I don’t get it!! This is only becoming more complicated!!
Kyuubee: It appears the fastest way to do this is to just ry it out.
I’ll act as the enemy and you can counter me. That way we’ll find out if it truly is a move meant for countering.
Go on and counter me without reservation.
Shinpachi: WHATS THE DEAL WITH THE FIGHTING GAME FEEL?!

012
Gintoki: Forget about that Pattan. Just hit down.
Shinpachi: Like this?
Gintoki: Your stamina gage is the one under the blue gage. Can you see it?
Shinpachi: OF COURSE I CANT!! WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE LOOKING AT?!
Gintoki: I’m looking at your glasses gage. If you don’t bear with it until the gage is filled all the way up, you can’t fuse with your glasses and do a new move.
Shinpachi: PATTSAN sure is a pain the ass to use!! He’s kind of like the one character who was abandoned by everyone!!
Kyuubee: Man***kgyou Tentsuugan!!
Man***kgyou Tentsuugan!!
(Sfx- Bukuhhh *fwooop*)
Kagura: This is bad, yes? She is spamming Man***kgyou Tentsuugan! Run away!
Shinpachi: But this Man***kgyou Tentsuugan is completely different from before!! It’s like the sorta move Zangief would use!!
Kyuubee: Man***kgyou Tentsuugan!! Man***kgyou Tentsuugan!!
(Sfx- Goohhh *fwooof*)
Shinpachi: That’s the Man***kgyou Tentsuugan too?! Just what the heck is the Man***kgyou Tentsuugan!?
Kyuubee: Man***kgyou Tentsuugan: (Up, Right, Down, Left, Up + All buttons). This move allows the missing left eye to activate the ‘True eye’ and open up. Once this occurs all moves become one hit ougis. Can you stop my move?!
Shinpachi: Man***kgyou Tentsuugan’s command scheme is basically a cheat code!! And aren’t you supposed to be helping me?!
Gintoki: The glasses gage is at full Shinpachii!!
(Sfx- Garaaaiiin *fwweeeen*)
Kagura: Now is the time! You can defend against the Man***kgyou Tentsuugan with your counter, yes?!
(Sfx-UROAAAAAHHHH!!)
(Sfx- Choon *tap*)

013
(Sfx- Dededederedereeee *dumddumdoumduuum*)
(Bottom- Don’t touch me…)
Shinpachi: WHHHHYYYY!!!?
I didn’t even get a chance to use my counter!! You touched my defense I was immediately defeated!!
Kyuubee: I—I’m sorry. When I felt my defenses get touched my body just acted on its own without me thinking..
Shinpachi: I didn’t get to counter!! Moreover you just confirmed our ougi is one that no one can use and expect to win!!
Kondo: Hmph…It’d be too too hard for Shinpachi-kun to use a swordplay with no flexability.
Kyuubee: What’s that?!
Kondo: The ones who are really strong can take on their opponent’s moves, and take control of the match even when they’re in a pinch.
Shinpachi-kun, I’ll give you a move you can stop without a problem.
Don’t worry about me and hit me with a counter!!
Tamakiiin-saaan!!
Tamakiiin-saaan!!
(Sfx- Byonn Byooonn *boing boing*)
Shinpachi: THE TAMAKIN-SAN IS THAT SORAT MOVE?!
DOESN’T THAT MAKE YOU A DIRTY VERSION OF DALSIM?!WHO’S GOING TO WANT TO TOUCH THAAAAT?!

014
(Sfx- Dededededreeeeere *Dumdumdumdumduuuum*)
(Bottom- Will you please go home?)
Shinpachi: What are you people dooooing?! I haven’t done a damn thing yeeeet!!
Gintoki: Hey. Knock off all this loitering around Shinpachi.
Dammit, I guess I have to step in after all.
Find your stance.
I’ll go easy on you so find a way to attack my defense.
Shinpachi: O—okay!!
Gintoki: Yeah. Like that.
(Sfx- Pan pan *thok thok*)
Gintoki: Just keep enduring it and find an opening.
Here ya go. Now go for it!
Shinpachi: UROOOOOOOOAHH!!

015
(Sfx- Dederederedreeee *dumdumdudmdoumdumduum*)
(Bottom- If you cant break through my ‘Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night (Short version) then you stand no chance of victory!!)
Shinpachi: YOU USED THE OUGIIIIIII?!
How dare you master someone else’s ougi faster than them in their own hoooooooome!!
Gintoki: But it’s sooo easy….
Shinpachi: How is it easy?! It shouldn’t be!! This is something a father passed down to his only son!! Read the damn mood!!
Gintoki: But it’s not like I’m the only one who did it. While you’ve been messing around everyone’s learned it.
(Sfx- Dogooohh *thooom*)
Kagura: I have learned this defense form too, yes?
(Handwritten- I’m next!)
Kyuubee (?): I’ve learned the defense technique that defends against the defence technique too Shinpachi-kun.
(Sfx- Dogooohh *thooom*)
(Sfx- Sugoooohhh *booom*)
Tae: And now I’ve mastered the defense technique that defends against that defense technique, Shin-chan.
Gintoki: And now I’ve mastered the defense technique that defends against that defense technique that defends against that defense technique, Pattsan.
Kondo: And now I’ve mastered the defense technique that defends against that defense technique that defends against that defense technique that defends against that defense technique Shinpachi-kuuguaaah!!
(Sfx- Gagoooohh *thoook*)
(Sfx- Bagooooh *booom*)

016
{Father…}
{The secret move you dedicated your life to producing…}
{Seems like the sorta thing anyone can pick up on a whim.}
{You passed it down to me as your only son, but everyone’s popping it like pretzels.}
{Why couldn’t you have made it a little more difficult?}
{If anyone can use it is it really still a secret move?}
{I thought at long last I had a secret move that only I’d be able to use yet….yet…}
{With this secret move I’ll never be able to protect the dojo---}
(Scroll- To learn this secret move you must travel to that designated place.)
{It—it…}
{CONTINUEEEEEES!?}
{You must embark on a rigorous journey…}
{You might feel like you’re being crushed by the severity…}
{You might feel like you’re being defeated sometimes…}

017
{But no matter what kind of difficulties you face…}
{With down, diagonal, left + (k)en you’ll overcome them.}
{And then at the end of your long journey…}
{You’ll find it for sure…}
{The two berries that are the keys to the ougi…}
{Cacao and Macadamia.}
{That’s right…make these presents…}
{And there will be no one who can match them in their sweetness.}
{And using this as bait…you will create an opening in your enemy…}
{For you to pierce their defense.}
{With the ‘Wicked blade’s dancing and singing all night Raijin’s special Ultra Miracle Super Mario Brothers second edition Luigi’s revenge directors cut’.}
Shinpachi: Please come next week for chocolate as well.
(Sfx- Peh *spit*)
Gintoki: He sure is his father’s son.
(Side text- The move’s name is ‘Dendo-mushinryuu’ huh….)
(TN- No idea what that means.)
GINTAMA LESSON 486………….END.