Only for use by HWMN
[Gintama 670 Translation by Kewl0210]
Someone: No matter how you look at it, this sure doesn't look like a country that won, does it?
Insert: The scars run deep...
Title: Lesson 670 Signboard
Author: Sorachi Hideaki
Insert: The TV Anime of 'The Silver Soul Arc' is now airing on Tokyo TV and affiliates Every Sunday at 1:35 AM with great fanfare!!
Gin: Even though we won the war, we lost, too.
Eeeverybody lost together.
Guys: Man, this is awful.
Are we ever gonna get it back to normal?
While some things will go back to how they were,
some other things won't...
Guys: Ane-san and Mone-san said
they don't know when he'll wake up.
He might be like that forever,
and he might wake up today.
But they could say at least
that we have no means of waking him up on our own power.
Kagura: Every planet has to have an Inugami, yes?
Even if this planet does not have such a way, some other planet might.
Gin-chan, I have made up my mind.
I have already told Poppy and the others.
Shin: Then we'll go too!!
Kagura: Do not come with me.
Kagu: If you are going to throw away your hometown when it is so beat up to chase after a woman's behind,
then I do not need your help.
Do you guys know why I started the Yorozuya in the first place?
To make a long story short, it's because I had nothin' to do.
I didn't feel like doing anything, so I decided to do anything.
Pretty messed up, right?
I think, ya know, we made it here for reasons like that a bunch.
So while I gathered together other messed up people like me,
I lost track of when it was time to stop.
Shin: What're you talking about?
You usually never talk about stuff from a long time ago.
At a time like this, you're gonna... quit...?
Gin: Like I said, we decided
that each one of us in this messed up group
have things we want... things we have to do, so
Gin: it's time to take down
this messed up sign.
I found something I need to do...
the ball's in your court.
Someone: Hey, mister?
What is this
Yorozuya Gin-chan thing?
Paper: Yorozuya Gin-chan
[Bottom left is illegible scribbles so leave those in]
Guy: Who exactly is this Yorozuya Gin-chan person who's written on the business card?
I mean, mister,
your name is Shimura Shinpachi, right?
So why isn't the name on the card Yorozuya Shin-chan?
SFX: KAN KAN
That person... isn't around anymore.
SFX: KAN KAN KAN
Shin: But if it weren't for that person,
the Yorozuya wouldn't be here.
Actually, the same probably goes for Edo
the same goes for me.
I don't want to forget him.
I want to remember him.
I want to remember us, the Yorozuya.
Wait, is that guy the hero from the war?
Shin: Uh, he's not really that type of...
Kid: I see... My dad told me
that when the war ended, all the Bakufu officials that'd run away came back only after everything had happened,
and then started arguing over which one of them had saved Edo. ["them" in italics]
Shin: They're all frauds.
The real hero
that protected Edo... that protected us
is that man.
Top Left: Professional
Big Middle Text: The Last Samurai
Someone: Until that man appeared,
everyone thought those creatures would be wiped out.
Guy: Without that person,
not only the earth, but the entire universe would have been destroyed, wouldn't it?
It was incredible. With a few words,
he made everyone forget who were enemies and allies, what their social status was, and became one.
I felt in my skin that that is what a true hero is.
Or perhaps that's not the right word... I suppose what you call men like that on this planet is...
Boxes: Hasegawa Taizou [Ha-se-gawa-tai-zou]
Someone: The image of the last samurai that saved this world
is now finally on camera.
With millions of military forces bearing down on him
he was the fighting force that stopped them, all on his own.
Asterisk: *A video recording replicating the event by the man himself.
SOmeone: On a battlefield surrounded on all sides,
T/N: His sword is Cloud Strife's sword, from Smash 4 doubles.
SFX: BAKI DOKO
director, somebody just hit me!!
Somoene: That charismatic entity that made everyone allies with just a few words.
And when that great despair descended on us
Hase: Hey, pull this up a little bit! It's heavy! Like really heavyyyy!!
Guy: that strength of his stopped it all on his own power.
And as he analyzed that attack, his sunglasses were also pulverized.
Hase: Hey, what're you doing?!
Hase: Hero? Last Samurai? Honestly, neither of those names quite suit me.
I'm dyed in many colors, both none of an all of those things...
Hase: I'm unemployed.
Some: Professional Samurai-Style Special Hasegawa Taizou coming soon to a TV near-
Shin: Sister, I'm home.
SFX: PUSU PUSU (SMOLDER)
Otae: Oh, welcome home, Shin-chan.
You're home early today.
Otae: I was just turning off the TV to go make dinner.
Shin: Uh, I think that's how Frieza turns off a TV. Please use the remote.
Otae: The Takanoiwa?
Shin: No that's just for shutting down Yokozuna.
T/N: Takanoiwa Yoshimori is a famous Mongolian sumo wrestler.
Shin: Well, he definitely fabricated a lot of it,
but please don't be too hard on him. Hasegawa-san did his part, too.
Otae: Everyone in Edo worked together to protect it. Ignoring all of everyone's efforts is the part I'm willing to be lenient about.
Shin: It's not like everyone fought hard so they could get lots of glory. But that man needed that.
An unemployed person became hero of the country. His wife that left him might even come back.
Tae: It's been 2 years since then. Me and everyone else has started on new paths since then and I want to be supportive,
but I just don't think I can be supportive of him.
Shin: He had it rougher than most people before, don't you think you can find it in you to wish him well?
Tae: That's not what I mean. It's just that his face just pisses me off and makes me want to punch it.
Shin: What happened to the part about everyone working hard together?!
Otae: Okay, I'll sugar-coat it a bit. I hate old men that don't act their age and glitz themselves up like Ex*le.
I like HIGH & LOW.
Shin: Uh, that wasn't much sugar on that coating. So little I think I could see the rising sun peaking through the seams.
T/N: Exile is a Japanese boy band. HIGH & LOW is a drama produced, and acted in, by members of Exile. Rising Sun is the name of a famous Exile song.
Tae: And is that person thinking about his wife at all?
Because I heard he's just spending night after night hanging out and drinking around the town for free by representing himself as a big hero.
Tae: Sister, where did you get that information? You've already washed your hands of the nightlife industry, haven't you?
Otae: It's not just heroes that've been born in these two years. Where there's light created, there's also going to be shadows.
SFX: PAN PAN
Shin: Where did those Zarbon and Dodoria-like cabaret club girls come from?!!
Tae: Carry out plan omega. Bring the hammer down on the soiled hero.
Shin: This is no time for "HIIIH"s! Where the hell did this dark Cabaret Club girl army come from?!!
Was Lord Frieza also born during those two years?!
it looks like the empress of Kabuki-Chou is still going strong as ever.
Kon: Sorry I'm late. The food is finally done.
Shin: Sorry, Kondou-san.
Always having you do stuff like this.
Kon: Nah, it's no biggie. Despite how I look,
I'll be a house-husband pretty soon.
And I have to make sure Tae-san gets all the nutrition she needs in her meals.
It's fine if you're concerned about the new paths everyone's taken, Otae-san,
but you need to think about your own new path, too.
Tae: I... I know.
Shin: I see... a house-husband, huh?
Hasegawa-san certainly was surprising, but I never would have thought that you would...
Sign: Letter of Resignation
Kon: I'd be lying if I said it was an easy decision,
but when that war ended, I definitely felt that one of my duties had ended.
They overcame the war and surpassed me.
There's nothing left for me to teach them.
Kon: But anyhow, both with leading the Shinsengumi and being a dad,
they're roles where you have to be willing to risk your life.
Trying to do both of them would be disrespectful to both of them.
This life of mine that I devoted to the sword,
I'm now going to devote to a family.
I'm kind of tired, you two can have dinner together just the two of you.
Shin: I'm... giving both you and Hasegawa-san my full support,
so in my eyes, both of you, no, everyone
are all fine heroes.
Everyone's started on new paths.
Everyone's started moving forward.
Shin: It's just me that's...
Otose: My, my. Time is a fearsome thing, isn't it?
Never did I think those two would end up having a shotgun wedding.
Though us old-timers haven't gotten a single new wrinkle in these two years.
I guess the flow of time really is different when you're younger.
Catherine: What are you talking about? You sure as hell got two new wrinkles in the corners of your eyes, Otose-san!!
Shin: Um, Catherine-san, did your face perhaps get hit by a time machine?
Cath: It is not something like time that causes something like this.
What causes it is the final chapter, dangit!
When manga get near the last chapter nowadays, all the characters suddenly pair up and the Final Fantasy phenomenon starts running rampant.
T/N: The kanji (an implied meaning) under the phrase they're reading as "Final Fantasy" here is "Final chapter mating season".
Shin: Catherine-san, I'm going to run your face over one more time.
Otose: What's that supposed to mean? Are you saying that if we get to careless, we might end up stuck with some characters we had no previous connection to?
Cath: It's really so scary I can't sleep!
Shin: Hey, somebody go grab a Delorian for me!!
Gengai: Sheddep, you old bats!! Any man on earth would Dragon Quest on their own before they Final Fantasy with one of you two!!
T/N: The kanji (and implied meaning) of Dragon Quest here is "slay my own dragon".
Cathering: We ain't talking to you!! What're we gonna do if your 'character flag' is raised, you old goat!!
Shin: I'M IN HELL!!
Cath: Do not get in a panic, buddy.
Shin: Would you please not talk do me? My flag is raised.
Cath: That is right! Your beloved sister had all sorts of things done to her by by that gorilla, after a~~ll.
Someone: I was totally certain that girl had a crush on Gintoki.
Shin: HEEEY, old granny, quit it! That's creepy!!
Otose: I thought the chances for that Final Fantasy were pretty high,
I guess it was the kind of touching Final Fantasy where with him gone, he comforted her when she was feeling lonely?
Cath: Yes, but it is amazing how that sort of Final Fantasy went so well.
Otose: Yeah, you're right. They say that rather than doing the loving themselves, women prefer the being-loved type of Final Fantasy, don't they?
Shin: No one says that! And seriously, why do you feel the need to keep going? This is the world's most vomit-enducing girl talk!!
Otose: If I had to make a judgement call, I'd say this is a definite 'good' Final Fantasy.
Cath: He may have been a stalker, but they did have a lot of interactions, so it was a Final Fantasy that did not feel abrupt.
If you are being strict about it, they were in mating season before even the final chapter, so it was not a very Final Fantasy-ish Final Fantasy.
Shin: Knock it off already! You guys are just doing this so you can keep using the phrase 'Final Fantasy', aren't you?!! That's never gonna catch on!! It's just making the scene really noisy!!
SFX: KYAI KYAI KYAI KYAI KYAI KYAI
Shin: Let's make that last one the Final Final Fantasy, okay?! Enough already!
Cath: Now you are just saying Final Fantasy to say it, too!
Otose: What's with you? We're just trying to cheer you up because you seemed down after your sister got taken from you.
Then how 'bout you show us some wedding photos?
Cath: Show us the photos of the gorilla and the female gorilla!
Handwritten: SHOW! US! SHOW! US!
Otose: Wow, Otae-san really got big in the little while I hadn't seen her.
Shin: That's not Otose.
Otose: Ah, here she is.
Shin: That's a gorilla.
Cath: This one is her.
Shin: That's a gorilla.
Shin: That's a gorilla born from a gorilla and a gorilla.
Shin: It was a political marriage.
The male is a house husband.
While doing his usual stalking, he was training to be a house husband so he just up and started making us food.
It's surprisingly tasty.
Someone: She put on some weight.
Still, I couldn't stop him.
That's just a warrior's
Whether a flag's been raised or not,
regardless of race, age, gender, or whether or not you remember it, it doesn't matter.
This is this manga's Final Fantasy.
So please do be careful.
SFX: GAKUBURU GAKUBURU (SHAKING/Shivering)
Girl: Ah, I finally fou~~nd you!
Mama~~, is the person in glasses over there
Insert: Final Fantasy Hell...!!