Desert Punk 5

Desert Punk, Volume 1, Chapter 5 (pp. 131~162)


<131>
=What the hell'd you do?
=A guy with an armored vehicle like the Kong's gotta be filthy rich or running some kinda huge business.//Being chased around by a guy like that means you must've done something crazy.

=Sure, you've got those contracts, but we're allowed to cancel them if we suspect foul play.
=You're right about him being super rich, but do you actually think I'd be stupid enought to get tripped up by the law? This is just a personal vendetta.

=RAAAH—


<132>
TH-TH-TH-TH-TH-
=URRR
=What.


<133>
BA-BA-BA-

[x3]BLAM


<134>
TH-TH-THUDD

=Whoaa—! Damn bastard—!
[x3]BLICK

GU—
[x5]GLACK

GLACK
=That's strange, it doesn't say anywhere on the contract that you're allowed to turn down a job.


<135>
=Oh... Well... I just meant feelings-wise.
=Like, "Oh if that's the case then I guess you can't help it—"//...See?

=Oh, okay then—
=You're right, a pro would never half-heartedly sign a contract, would they—
=URR...

=Ahh—Damn it—!
=If it weren't for that stupid debt...!

=...And stop distracting me with your boobs.
HMPH
=Huh?//What?

=Big bro!
GU—
BAM
[x3]TAK
=I don't like desert suits and helmets, so I figured I'd ditch them for the morning.

=Liar—! You're showing them off, aren't you—!
[x2]POKE
AHH—
=No I'm not—!


<136>
=GAHHH—!
=WHOA!
=EEK!
BLAM

=What the hell! How dare you guys start tickling around while we're fighting a war—!
=Sorry—
T-Tickling..

=Asshole!
ZUP
=You used us as decoys!
GACHUK

=KAHH—
BWUSH


<137>
CONK
Hi-yah!

=Moron—! Then I'd be halfway across the desert instead of hanging around here—!
=O-Oww—

=You just don't get it, do you.
[x2]THUMP
=I-I don't. What the hell is up with you all of a sudden...

=That guy's not trying to kill us.


<138>
=Just think about it.
=He's got that much firepower. We'd already be dead if he really wanted to kill us.
TH-TH-TH-TH-TH-TH
=Hmm... Th-That's true.
=What're you doing bro—!?

=But then... Why's he shooting at us like crazy?
=He's trying to scare us.
=We're already scared shitless, but... What for?

=Because we've got something he re—ally wants.
TWW—
P-PWIP
=He doesn't want to risk having it blown to bits along with the rest of us.

=Damn bastard's thinking we'll just give up and bring it over to him if we're scared enough.
BLAM

=Wh-What is it!? What the hell does he want!?
=He wants...


<139>
BWIP
=What big-ass tits-woman is hiding between those big-ass tits!//The key!
UCK—!

=H-How did you...!?
=Kong said so.
=Oh yeah—He did say something about a key.

=What a conniving woman. She hired us to keep Kong busy while she runs away by herself.
=O-Oh no...
=We were hired as decoys!

=Decoys? Like the way you used us just now?
UCK


<140>
=L-Look—We didn't have time to talk back there, right—?
BWHAP
=I just wanted you guys to buy a little time, so I stuck my foot out in front of Haruo, but...

=O-Of course I did it knowing Kong wasn't trying to kill us.//Otherwise, I never would've done something so horrible—
=I get it. What're you so panicked about?

=A-Anyways, we're in trouble if he finds out that we've realized all this stuff.
TH-TH-TH
WHAM
B-BOOM
=We're up against a guy using Kong just to chase around a girl. He's a filthy rich perverted bastard. Who know what he's really up to.//He'll be easier to handle if we keep him feeling good about himself.

=What the hell are you planning?

=HEH

Such an accurate assessment of the situation from the little information he's been given...
This guy's amazingly quick when he's cornered or when there's money involved. Recruiting him was the right choice.
[x5]HEH


<141>
=Here's the plan:
[x2]MUMBLE
=Whaat!? Is that really gonna work!?
=It's the only way.

=Alright, fine—It's not like I've got a better plan.
GACHUK

=Hey, Fuyuo.

=I was really pissed at first, but now that I think about it,
=I'm glad you guys are on my side. Nobody in the West can handle crazy stuff like this better than you guys.

Kanta... You always talk shit about us, saying we're stupid and what-not...
But I guess deep down, you really thought pretty highly of us.

=Looks like we're in this anyways.
=Might as well make it through and get that money.

=Gimme 10 minutes.
TH-TH-TH
C-CLANK
=You got it.


<142>
=Hey—Did you really realize he wasn't out to kill us before you tripped Haruo-kun?
[x3]GACHUK
=No way—I realized that when we were talking back here.

Switching shells
=Huh? That means...
[label right]Smoke
[label left]Light

=I was planning on run away by using those 3 dim-wits as decoys, but I only made it this far.
GACHUK
=I knew it—
=Flattery works best on the unintelligent.

=Here you go.
CHUK
=Huh?
=Unload the whole thing on Kong when it stops moving.

=Wha—t? But I'm the client—I have to do something too—?
=You just have to shoot. Kong is gonna stop in about 8 minutes, okay?
WHAM
TH-THUD


<143>
RA-TA-TA-TA-TA-

BWUUSH

[margin]Junko


<144>
GWUSH

[x2]FLAP
STOPS

ZU-ZU-ZU-ZU

=Wow, it really stopped!
=But why!?

=No wayy—This was his plan?


<145>
=We surrender—

=So you've finally realized that resistance is futile.
ZU—
=You're lucky. I was just about ready to crush you guys.
=HEH!

=I've got a bad feeling about this... Maybe I should've listening in on the plan.
=A-Anyways, all I need to do is shoot, right?

=!? Watch out!
BEE—P
=There's another one coming out!


<146>
[x4]BLAM
[x2]GACHUK
=It's all up to you, Desert Punk!

=It's the girl! Don't shoot!
[x2]SWISH
=Whoa!

BA-BA-BA


<147>
=What the—!?
=It's a super high-heat flash bang and an iron powder smokescreen!//All radar systems are down! We can't see a thing!

=Hey, that was just a distraction!

TH-TH-TH-TH-TH
=Huh?

=AHH!//Hey, what're you guys doing!?
THUD
SPLAT


<148>
BWWWW

=Where are they!?
=They're gone, sir!

=There they are! Behind us!
=The dried-up well!

=Damn it, don't let him get inside! There's lots of tunnels under that well!
GWUUSH
=It's too late, sir!


<149>
=What the heck—? Is that a balloon?
=Nobody's inside except for this thing.

=He got us.
=A decoy, sir.//They must be halfway across the desert by now.

=Hmph, that reminds me.
=That infamous Desert Punk was helping them out, wasn't he.


<150>
=After them!
=They're headed east!
GWHIRR
BWWW

GWUUUSH

PUFF

ZWIISH

POP
=Phew—Finally.

ZWIISH
=Wow—It was a cheap plan, but it worked—
=Gosh—So this was what you guys were up to. You scared me when you started pouring sand all over me.//But gee, what a pathetic plan—


<151>
=A portable flash bang won't keep them blind for long. They'll get their radar back soon.
=This is the best way to deal with guys that are all puffed up with heavy armor.
=What were you planning on doing if Kong had tried to wait us out?
=Dunno—

=It's a little roundabout, but we'll be going through the skeleton cities to get to the East Oasis.
=Hovercrafts aren't good with crowded places like this.
=Phew—Let's take a little break here.


<152>
=Alright, let's hear it.
=Huh?
=Not "huh," we wanna hear the details.

=Who that guy is, and why he's after you.
=We need every scrap of info we can get if we wanna get out of this alive.

=...Right, that makes sense.//Just one sec.

=You remember this, don't you?

[margin]Desert Punk


<153>
=Th-That's—!!!

=Yep, I stole it from you 3 months ago.
[x2]HUFF
Y-You still had this thing?

=Ohh—Could that mean...
[margin]Second-born: Akio

=One of the girls that screwed you over,
[margin]First-born: Fuyuo

=W-//W-//Was Junko-san?
[margin]Third-born: Haruo

=DWA—HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH
=She tricked you before and you still took the job!?
=What an idiot—Hah-hah-hah-hah!//That's so cool...!
[x2]RABBLE
=Sh-Shut up!
=Now now—

=Do you remember your client, Koichi Ohkawa?
=Of course.//I'll whack him in the face next time I see him.
[caption]Koichi Ohkawa
GRIP


<154>
=Okay, then you've heard of Taiko Ohkawa, right?
=Well of course, that's the guy who built Ohkawa Co. from scratch.//He's a big-time CEO.

=Oh, I know!//They're the huge corporation that's made loads of money digging up stuff from the Dark Ages and finding out how they work so they could make new ones and sell them to people.
I've heard about them
=Shut up, we know already.

=Pretty much all the weapons we have now are replicas of artifacts that Ohkawa Co. dug up.
=He's held in high esteem among people of our trade.

=Huh!?//Does that mean...

=Yep, Koichi Ohkawa is—
=Taiko Ohkawa's oldest son!
=ACK!!
WHAA—T


<155>
=That means he's gonna be next CEO!
=If I whacked that guy in the face, I'd be in such big trouble—!
Scary—

=But you see, he can't become the CEO that easily...//Even if he is the oldest.
=...Huh?

=—That's where this thing comes into play.

Taiko Ohkawa, age 65, started thinking about retiring and choosing a successor.
Taiko has a number of sons. Some from his wife, some from his mistresses.
Taiko himself had worked his way up the ladder, so he didn't want to make it a hereditary issue. He wanted to determine who was best suited to take his place.

The candidates were: Ohkawa Co. Department of Intelligence chief, the first-born, Koichi.
And Department of Security chief, the second-born, Koji. People referred to them as the "Fox" and the "Tiger."


<156>
Taiko couldn't make up his mind about which one to pick, so he came up with another idea.

=Remember how one of our cargo vehicles got attacked, and we were like "whatever," because they didn't get anything valuable?
=Turns out they got the key to my dead mother's treasure box.//So whoever finds that thing gets to be the successor, okay?

=The whole company went up in arms after that.//At that point, they didn't even know who'd taken the cargo.
=So they ended up hiring us.

=Oh—So that's where Desert Punk got duped up by Junko-san.

=So I tried to bring the key over to the first-born...
=And the second-born came barging in, huh...


<157>
=That's when I realized—
=Yeah, I could make some serious money here.

=I secretly made contact with the first-born while I negotiated with the second-born, and... Gosh, I was so busy these past 3 months.
SIGH
=So...//You started to jack up the bounty.

=That's right. I guess I went a little too far...
=The second-born got ticked off, and Kong came after me.

=Anyways, we're safe if we can make it over to the first-born's territory in the East Oasis. Okay everybody...
=Let's do this—!

Yeah—
UCK
=Huh?


<158>
=*sigh...* Yeah, we'll do it... It's our job after all.
=Well, it should work out. There's ways out of this.
=Really—!?

=Wow, what's the plan? How are you gonna defeat Kong?
=No, stupid! We're not gonna try and kill it!
=We're just gonna run like crazy.
=Oh—That's lame.

=Gotta hand it to the Desert Punk. Cheap as always.
=Anyone who even thinks about trying to beat Kong is the biggest, stupidest, lowest douchebag ever in the Kanto Great Desert.

=Huh!?


<159>
GONK
WHAM

=Whoaa—It's the Kong—!
=He killed Desert Punk—!
=Who the hell said hovercrafts aren't good with crowded places—!? He's right there—!
=Desert Punk said that!


<160>
=Pathetic desert fools...

=Do you know they call me the "Tiger" of the Ohkawa Co. Department of Security?

=Because I always go full force,
=Even when I'm hunting the tiniest mouse.


<161>
=Shit...!

=U-Uhh...

=The Zero-Type helmet I just finished repairing...

=My desert lifeline, the Sakura-model air-cooling machine...
[x2]SWUSH

=The Winchester I got from my old man...


<162>
Heh
Heh-heh-heh-heh, Kong you bastard...
I'm gonna fucking kill you.