Detroit Metal City 11
N: After the concert at Budokan, the President decided to pay for a vacation for all of us.
N: I, of course, chose to return home to Osaka.
N: Phew...it's been a while since I've come back here.
N: I talk on the phone with mom a lot, but I wonder how everyone else is doing...
N: Little bro Toshi-kun and I have a lot in common, so we'll hang out a lot...
T: Big bro, I got the same haircut as you!
N: Ah, that looks good!
N: For this vacation, I just want to forget about DMC and take it easy.
T: "Love and Machinegun" from Flipper's Guitar is the best, isn't it?
N: Hehehe...I'm home, Shige-mi!
N: Good boy, good boy...you've become big, haven't you?
M: Oooi, Sou-kun! You came home!
N: Hey, mama!
M: Welcome back!
M: Looks like you've been well!
N: Why...why the hell...
N: is mom wearing a DMC shirt??!
M: Sou-kun, what's wrong?
N: Maybe I got a little drunk on the train...
N: That shirt was only sold at the live performance...
M: Seems like you've become weaker since you went to Tokyo! You'd best get inside and rest.
N: I know that there's no way my family could have found out that I'm in that band...
N: So then just what is going on here...!?
M: We're making those fried eggplant thingies you like so much tonight!
M: Toshihiko, your brother's home~!
N: Those explosive vibrations I'm feeling...
T: HEY!! OLD BAG!
T: Why the fuck are you wearing that new DMC shirt I just bought, huhhhh?!
Mom: Ahh, you scared me!
Speaker: COME ON IN, MY DEMONBEAST!
T: I'll murder you!
Speaker: COME ON IN, TONIGHT'S SACRIFICE!
N: This song is the new one from DMC that we had plans to edit onto an album!
M: You shouldn't speak to your parents like that!
M: Your older brother's even here...
Speaker: COME ON IN, DARK SON!!
T: Shut up and take it off already, before you stretch it out!!
T: Eh? Bro, you mean you live in Tokyo and don't know about DMC already?
T: This song is "Deathpenis" that was leaked to the radio from a live perforamnce!!
N: No...you mean Toshi-kun's already become a full DMC follower?!
M: Maybe you can do something about him, Sou-kun...
Speaker: HERE I COME, HERE I COME, IN YOUR ASS, IN YOUR MOUTH!
T: HEY!! HERE I COOOME!
Speaker: Here I come, here I come, in your ear, in your nose!
N: Come on, Toshi-kun, you can't talk like that...
N: And are you sure it's alright to dye your hair that color?
T: You mean you still haven't changed that penis-cut of yours!!
T: Man, what a lamer! FUCK!!
N: P..penis...? (This is a mushroom!)
M: Here, Sou-kun, want some pickled kicchome?
T: When Krauzer-san was a child, he killed his parents and then raped them! Ya gotta respect the guy!
N: Um...trust me, I really believe he didn't do that...
T: What the?! How dare you defy Krauzer-san like that!!
T: Besides, how would you know anyway!! Don't fuck with me~
T: I'll give you a surprise, bastard!!
T: When Krauzer-san was born, his first words were "Please kill me!"
T: Right when he was born, he knew how dangerous he was!!
M: He must have been a healthy baby...when Sou-kun was bored, he was so soft, I was worried...
N: What a terrible son I am...
T: Ahhh, the song ended!!
N: Man...Toshi-kun always looked up to me from so long ago, too...
T: ..my hero!
N: Uh, what he said right now, I think it justmeans he loves me...
M: I'm sorry, Sou-kun...
M: Since about half a year ago, he's been under the influence of that weird music...
M: I was worried about it, but just couldn't tell you...
M: I think he must have been lonely since you went to Tokyo..
M: This year he hasn't taken any tests or been to high school...and he never helps around the house, either.
N: This is all my fault!
N: The music I'm making...
N: ...is ripping my family apart!
N: If I can't find some way to fix Toshi-kun...
M: Well, tonight, I've got to work on making those fried eggplant thingies...
Speaker: I'm gonna murder you, I'm gonna murder you!
Speaker: I'm gonna...etc. (same)
Cell phone: Incoming Call
T: Who the hell'd be calling me this late?
?: Hey fucker, come out to the field behind your house right now.
T: Who's the bastard who gave me that call?!
T: Show yourself! I'm gonna murder you!
K: You really think you can murder ME?
T: Wha..what are you doing here...
K: Tonight is a full moon....your thoughts called me up from Hell...
N: Good thing I randomly decided to bring the costume back with me...
T: Awesome!! You mean you're not here with Jyagi-sama and Kamyu-san?!
K: This is a private affair.
K: You see, fucker, you never help out around the house...
K: And additionally, you don't go to school...
T: Yeah!! I want to be just like Krauzer-san!
T: I don't do useless shit like homework and housework!
K: YOU FOOL!
K: What about taking care of cows?
K: I'm the emperor! (good boy) which means I have (good boy) control over (good boy) all living creatures!
T: I can't believe he'd be like that to someone he doesn't even know...
T: So that story about you and Jack Ille Dark's Metal Buffalo was true...!
K: Next, cutting grass!
K: It's necessary you master this so you may later sever heads in a similar fashion!
K: Betcha can't do something as cool as this, huh, bitch?
T: Woah, you're so good with your hands! (And super fast!)
K: Finally, driving the tractor!
K: This way you have the proper driving techniques needed when you go to jack a car or something!!
T: Amazing...you're just like a farmer's son!
T: Krauzer-san, I never knew you held these kinds of skills....
K: I also reign over all tests and colleges!
K: Being the emperor, there must be no knowledge that is out of my grasp!
T: Is that so....?!
T: That means I do have to study...
T: Krauzer-san, tonight at least, please be my tutor!!
T: Amazing...Krauzer-san's really in my room...
N: What a dirty room...
T: Krauzer-san, what do you want to drink?!
K: Ahh, Milk Tea is fine.
T: Eh?! But we have brandy, you know! And wine or something!
K: Er...yes, normally, I would choose that, but how easily you forget of the "Milk Tea Whilst Studying" law!
T: OK, Milk Tea then!!
K: The President would blow a fuse if she saw me acting like this, but...
K: I have to do it for Toshi-kun!
K: Hey, this is my picture...
K: Wh...what!! Is this your brother?!
T: Yeah, is he a loser or what?! It's embarassing!
T: His haircut even looks like a penis!
K: You infernal dumbshit!! This is the high-class death metal hairstyle known as the "Public Obscenity Cut!"
K: Our new song "Deathpenis" is singing about this very thing!!
T: A...are you serious?!
N: It makes me sad just saying this...
K: Alright, time to begin our studies!
K: Now, Question #1! In the Honnouji Incident, who assassinated Oda Nobunaga?!
T: That was Krauzer-san, wasn't it?!
T: You probably thought Oda Nobunaga was a nuisance to your plans!!
K: Well...obviously, it was I who was pulling the strings from the shadows...
K: But the man recorded as the assassin in the annals of history is "Akechi Mitsuhide," so don't forget it!
T: Akechi, got it!
K: Was Toshi-kun always this big of an idiot?
K: Alright...time for some easy math.
K: A store sold a total of 210,000 yen worth of goods.
K: Split between three of the employees so that everyone has an equal share, how much do they get?
T: Krauzer-san would just kill everyone else and take it all for himself!!
K: Well...yes, if it was me, I would.
K: But returning to the question, the correct answer is 70,000 yen...
N: The studies continued in this fashion late into the morning...
M: Ah, Toshi-kun, is this a friend of yours?
T: This is Johanne Krauzer the 2nd, from Hell, mom! (I'll introduce you!)
Mom: Oh, from Shikoku? (Note: Hell in Japanese is "Jigoku," while Shikoku is an island in Japan, thus the joke.)
Krauzer: This is bad!!
K: Ahh...hello there.
Mom: Thanks for coming from such a faraway place! Let get you some breakfast..
N: And so, they made me breakfast.
K: This food is wonderful! You must really love your parents, kid!
M: Oh, Krau-chan!
M: You must love eggplant, huh?
K: I do!!
N: And, after that...
M: It's too bad Sou-kun isn't around to meet you.
N: They even went as far as to take a picture to remember me.
K: Well now, the Gates of Hell should be closing now, so I must be off....
M: You should take some pickled kicchome back with you!
N: Hey, I'm back from my walk...
T: Ah, big bro!!
N: With that, the Toshi-kun that I "fixed"...
T: That really looks sweet, just like a real penis!!
T: I want to go back to the "Public Obscenity Cut" too!
N: ...was left behind at home.
N: In the end, I didn't get to relax after all...
[Track 11 - END]
A famous dish from Osaka Prefecture. Daikon, Cucumber, Carrots and the like are all used in preparing this stuff. They're chewy and tasty. Some people even say they are the savior to those modern people who don't like vegetables.
[Usage Example] Pickled kicchome is so good! Pori pori pori pori pori pori....
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