The firewood that's given as a present in Tama
Text: Kuro Kuroku
Girl: It's been 2 weeks already.
Girl: Chiaki-chan, did you get used to your job yet?
Chiaki: Eh? // Yes, I'm doing fine.
Text: The girl who works at the Yokai City Hall...
Chiaki: My boss it a bit weird though. [Arrow: Weird]
Girl: What? Sounds interesting. (Heh heh heh.)
Chiaki: More specifically, it's weird in every possible way.
Girl2: So, did you save up already? // Money. // I've been waiting all this time, Chiaki?
Girl2: You promised to slap me on the cheek with a bundle of banknotes, remember? (Ahahaha.)
Chiaki: (Ufufufu) I'm waiting for you to build a wall of banknotes, Shion. [Bank notes wall] (It angers me that you can really do it.)
Girl: ...you've been like this for 3 years, and I'm still not used to it...
Text: is just a normal High School student at noon!!
Box: Truth is, I use that high wage
Girl: By the way, Shion-chan, did you change your hair band? (It's so cute!)
Shion: Yes, it's a gift from a boy.
Box: to pay off a huge debt. // So my daily life hardly changed.
XXX: But it'll be of no help at all to build a wall.
XXX: Ha ha...
Shion: ...because Chiaki finally got a new job, // maybe it'll change her mood a bit?
Girl: Yeah, that'd be great ♪
Chiaki: Eh! Me!?
Shion: You never got a gift from a boy, did you?
Chiaki: Shut up, Shion. // Is it my fault?
Shion: More or less.
Box: ...well, speaking of it.
Shion: So, as a compensation, I'll take this soy-flavored omelet.
Chiaki: Then I'll eat this expensive-looking meat.
Box: I have no thirst // for such a "present"----
Chiaki: This meat tastes great...
[T/N: present = situation]
Girl: Receiving a present isn't always a good thing. // ...have you heard about it?
Girl: This school school's mystery // "Spirited Away".
Black text: A yokai office comedy // The 3rd Chapter of the new series is 23P!! // Kuro Kuroku // Report 3 The firewood that's given as a present in Tama //
White text: A bizarre present for you!!
Circles: Nakamura Atsushi
Text: Read chapter 1~2 for free at the JUMP HP!!
Girl: ...a present that is send to you by someone from the opposite sex will suddenly disappear... // After that, a mysterious chunk of iron will appear in its place... // That's "Spirited Away"!!!
Shion: But that rumor // already goes around Tama's Easters high school for over 50 years. (A pervert with a fetish for iron?)
Girl: (Ma..Maybe there is one.)
Kuroku: It could be the work of a yokai.
Chiaki: I thought so too, Kuroku-san. If it's true, maybe...
Kuroku: Anyhow, if it enters the school // it's in violation of Article 27 of the (secret) city regulations, the provision on intrusion outside the living quarters.
Kuroku: In the past a group of Akaname sneaked into the University's girl's dorm. // It's only one of the many violations of the regulations.
Chiaki: That's not what you'd call mere trespassing, right!!?
[T/N: Akaname = a bathroom yokai, it is the personification of the fear to use a dark bathroom late at night. It is said they come out at night to lick up the dirt that accumulates in a bathroom.]
Chiaki: An..Anyway! (cough.) // I'm sorry for bothering you during work...!
Kuroku: That's fine, I can do this with one hand.
Chiaki: You're unusually dependable today! That's a surprise!
Kuroku: A present from the opposite sex... // Going on for more than 50 years...
Kuroku: Alright, Chiaki. After class ends, wait for me at school!
Kuroku: Ah, a full house.
Chiaki: Full house!!?
Chiaki: ...what am I doing here at this hour... // Ryoko went to bed, after asking " You'll be late again?"...
Chiaki: Eh? By the way, why isn't he here yet? // I've been waiting for 5 hours already. // I'm only still waiting so I can tell him off.
Chiaki: Kuroku-san... // Because he's so slow // my friend fell victim too...
Shion: (It's really a chunk of iron!)
Girl: (It's not funny!)
Chiaki: ... I wonder if she feels hurt, oh...?
Chiaki: ...well, it's not like he'll // ever apologize. (ha ha ha)
Chiaki: Because he really // has no tact.
Kuroku: Why do you sleep // during work?
Kuroku: The preparations took some time. // ...well, it's convenient that everyone else left already.
Chiaki: Wh..What time do you think it is!?
Chiaki: ......eh? // Wh..What's this?
Kuroku: What do mean?
Kuroku: It's a present.
Chiaki: Wh...Wh...W..Wh... // Wh..Why, all of a sudden!!? (It's even a bouquet!)
Kuroku: ...huh, does aren't you in a hurry? // ......well, whatever.
Kuroku: Now the next step.
Chiaki: Ne...Next step...?
Kuroku: We go to a dark and inconspicuous place.
Chiaki:N...No. Eh!? What!? Wh...Wh..wh..What are you saying!? // Is this yokai-style power harassment!!?
Kuroku: You can leave the bouquet here.
Kuroku: It'll be in the way. // You don't need it.
Chiaki: Wh...Wh..What will be in the way!? What don't I need!?
Kuroku: Shut up and come here.
Chiaki: No, I don't want----
Kuroku: ...oh // just as I heard...
Kuroku: The story about the bouquet // that would be stolen if left behind.
Yokai: ...at a holy school building...
Chiaki: at that place...
Yokai: To make vulgar demands from a woman one hates-----
Yokai: I absolutely won't allow it!!!
XXX: No way, // that person was-----
Yokai: ......I'll teach savages like you // the way of piling firewood!!!!
Chiaki: ------just // Who is he!!!?
Chiaki: Who is this macho!!? // I have absolutely don't know him!!!
Yokai: ...if you demand to know my name, I'll tell you, young woman.
Yokai: My name is Ninomiya Kinjirou. // I'm an "artman".
Chiaki: What the hell is this person talking about!!?
[T/N: Ninomiya Kinjirou, a.k.a. Ninomiya Sontoku was prominent Japanese agricultural leader, philosopher, moralist and economist of the 19th century. Statues of him are often found in front of schools, depicting him reading a book and carrying firewood on his back. They say he would read and study whenever he could.]
Yokai: No, to be precise... // I'm the manifestation of the a deep-seated grudge that Kinjirou bore before his death...
Kuroku: ...he's like one of the subspecies of the tsukimogami.
[T/N: tsukumogami = a type of yokai. The term is generally applied to any object that is 100 years old and came to live.]
Chiaki: ...that reminds me! // Kinjirou was like the symbol of diligence, abstinence and honesty!! (I'll pick up firewood // while I read a book.)
Chiaki: As a kid he plaited straw sandals, so he could buy alcohol for his father and he worked hard to lit a lamp so he could read, applying himself to his studies // Also, he once predicted it would be a cool summer based on the taste of an eggplant!
Kuroku: What the hell are you talking about?
Chiaki: For that person to steal---- (He's one of my heroes!!)
Yokai: During my lifetime, I cultivated myself devoting myself to my studies. // But, those who are too talented, are sometimes incompatible with their surroundings...
Yokai: ... you probably can't imagine. // The great amount of unjust I received.
Kinjirou: (Furuko... you are worthy of me. // Would you accept this "firewood" as the "symbol of my love" ...?)
Furuko: (This... firewood symbolizes your love.. Ha ha // Furuko)
Friend: (Ugh! What's that? So disgusting!! // Friend)
Friend: That's really disgusting!! // Friend)
Man: How much love can you carry on your back!!?
Man: It must be heavy because of the double meaning!!
Yokai: ...and soon I realized it. // This world where I'm not popular...------ // is distorted...!!!!
Yokai: One day at this school // I met with the grudge of some boys who carried the same mental wounds like I did during my life. // Wounds that don't burn away like firewood, and I became more powerful!!
[T/N: burn away like firewood = disappear with a present]
Yokai: It was all to clean up!!!!
Yokai: "Firewood" is the symbol---- // It's the crystal of our spilled tears...!!!
Yokai: I absolutely cannot permit presents that are filled with happiness!! // The perfect friendship between men and women is detestable, it's pure evil!!
Chiaki: ...is that why he exchanged the "presents" for "firewood"...!? // That's...... // That's creepy!!
[T/N: present = happiness, firewood = garbage]
Chiaki: You..you've been doing that for 50 years...
Yokai: ...as expected, you don't understand?
Yokai: Let me ask you, when a person finished piling up the firewood // What's the next thing they wait for...?
Chiaki: Eh!? We...Well...
Yokai: ...to pile up // the firewood again.
Chiaki: Will all people turn out like this, if they aggravate being smart!!?
Yokai: A girl would never understand... // No... that is-----
Yokai: ...I could say the same to // a handsome boy like you.
Kuroku: ...hm? Ah, that reminds me of earlier...
Yokai: (Kuroku-san is pretty handsome, but // you're not friendly at all. This way you'll never be popular with the girls.)
Kuroku: That's what he said...
Chiaki: Well, you say a lot of nasty things!!!
Yokai: Wha...!!? // M... my body // doesn't move...!!?
Kuroku: That's because // of my technique.
Kuroku: At first I had a lot of trouble using this technique, but... // if I prepare a method with the soul charms built within beforehand, even I ------
Kuroku: simply with my supernatural power, // can use it.
Text: "The Law of Teishin"
[T/N: Teishin = fixed body]
Yokai: Guguuh! The...then you... // Ri..right from the start...!
Yokai: That present // was a trap......!!!
Kuroku: To be honest, I am
Kuroku: the same as you are. // I know nothing about presents.
Kuroku: Even though they knew it was only a tool to do my job, // just as they heard that I would give it to Chiaki.
Kuroku: Those guys // lost themselves in helping me.
Kuroku: ...at this playful workplace // she's always working really hard. // Our new staff member.
Yokai: (I'm not doing this to help Kuroku-san. // It could be the perfect opportunity. // Sis, Chiaki-chan~ // You can only give those that look beautiful...!)
Kuroku: Today is her // two week anniversary.
Kuroku: ...how should I say. // Those guys-----
Kuroku: wanted it to be a "present"// that would convey their gratitude.
Kuroku: .......even now, I don't // really understand it
Kuroku: ...but, if you've been // trampling on...... // that kind of feeling until now...!!!!
Yokai: Wa... // Wait!
Kuroku: that makes me really angry----- // ...that's what // I do understand.
Chiaki: I see...... // It disappeared...
Box: After that // we found all the stolen items inside the pedestal // and returned all of them to their owners. // As a punishment, Kinjirou was to make sure of that...... // But
Chiaki: There are still some left, Kuroku-san?
Kuroku: He said the rest is too old and he doesn't know who the owners are. // Well, they'll become the property of the (secret) Tama City Hall.
Chiaki: It's beautiful...it's a hair ornament, right? (An ornamental hairpin?)
Kuroku: ...hey, hey, are you serious? // This is made from granite, right...!?
Chiaki: Is it something special?
Kuroku: It emits an extremely powerful Hama. // This thing has as much defensive power as a spirit hand... (He didn't take this from a student...)
[T/N: hama = the power to destroy evil.]
Kuroku: That's perfect.
Kuroku: Put it in.
Chiaki: Af...After all, I can't accept such a special...!!
Kuroku: ...you'd better wear it at all times, also after work.
Chiaki: Bu... // But...
Kuroku: ......Aah! // Well.
Kuroku: If it's a present from me // It's okay, right?
Kuroku: Ah... or would you rather have this...
Chiaki: No, it's fine.
Chiaki: ......Kuroku-san. // Thank you...!
Kuroku: Ah... you're // welcome.
Text: Without realizing it (!?) Good job, boss!!
Text: Kuro Kuroku // Report 3 / End
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