Kinnikuman 312

Though he was presumed dead after taking the vicious attacks of Bikeman, a bizarre miracle has occurred with Ramenman reviving thanks to the tears of the audience! But will this strange event give him another chance to take victory?

Chapter 312: Scramble for the Kinniku Throne (39): Violent! The Road of Death!!

47.
Announcer: How could this be happening: Ramenman, who should have stopped breathing from taking Bikeman’s Kill the Skydive is standing up---!!

48.
Bike: Ho…how?
Bike: My Skydive should have perfectly been taken by Ramenman’s vitals…
Suguru: The rain!
Bike: Now that you mention it, how can it rain inside a castle that is completely encircled around us?

49.
Suguru: Starting with myself and Robin, the tears for wanting to help Ramenman from the entire audience in the castle became a large quantity of rain, raining down on the Thunderdome…
Robin: And then Ramenman, who should have stopped breathing at that moment, had his body bathed in the affectionate rain of sadness, miraculously reviving his breathing.
Bike: A dead Choujin being revived when bathed in tears is ridiculous……
Ramen: Cho…Choujin who are bound by selfish desires like all of you may…see this as ridiculous…
Ramen: Ho…however, for us Justice Choujin, it…is…possible even to revive those who have stopped breathing wi…with the power of love.
Ramen: That’s the se…secret of the Justice Choujin’s strength.
Bike: Uh…uuh.

50.
Bike: He—y, you can’t do that----!!
Announcer: The cool Bikeman has poured a forceful Head Butt on Ramenman---!!
Bike: Sorya
Bike: Ta—

51.
Announcer: Bikeman has thrown up his tires and is changing into a motorcycle again---!!
Bike: If that’s how it is, I’ll run you over and over and over again so you won’t come be coming back---!!
Ramen: Your unpreparedness is your greatest enemy, Bikeman: the Thunderdome’s wire-screen that you’re driving on is wet with the puddles from the audience’s tears…yes, just like a road on a rainy day!!
Bike: What---!?

52.
Bike: Uwaaa----!!
Ramen: I’ve got you---!!

53.
Announcer: Ramenman has thrusted his own head into Bikeman’s groin, taking a stance that’s like he’s riding piggyback---!!
Ramen: Sorya—
Announcer: And here, while bending his body, is dropping headlong placing his body weight on Bikeman---!!
Ramen: JIULONG CHENG DROP!!
(TN: Unlike many of Ramenman’s other techniques, which are in Japanese and which actually makes sense to be translated, this one is a combination of Chinese and English, both of whom have their readings set up so that it is how the technique is supposed to be read, not in Japanese or as translations. “Jiulong Cheng” is the pinyin reading of the actual Chinese Ramenman uses here, which translates into “Kowloon City”. [one of the 18 sections of Hong Kong] Though many have called this technique “Kowloon Drop”, I will be translating this attack as it was originally intended, with both Chinese and English used appropriately)

54.
Suguru: You’ve done it, Ramenman: what a major technique for your resuscitation---!!
Ramenman: Thank you: I have been saved a second time by everyone’s rain of sadness.
Announcer: Suddenly, a large quantity of electricity is pouring out from Bikeman’s body!!
Robin: Perhaps there’s a failure of his battery with the shock of taking Ramenman’s technique, making him discharge electricity.
Suguru: But Bikeman is storing a whole lot of electricity in that body……
Ramen: Now’s my chance: if I don’t stab to finish Bikeman with this opportunity

55.
Bike: Electric Ring---!!
Ramen: Th…this is!?
Announcer: Electric rings that have been fired from both of Bikeman’s hands has sealed Ramenman’s movements, making Ramenman’s body become like quoits---!!
(TN: “Quoits” is a game involving throwing rings over a distance near a certain spike, akin to horseshoes)
Bike: Hehehe…I have a bit less than enough electricity, which is the source of my life along with gasoline…wait quietly until I’ve finished charging up.

56.
Bike: Parthenon, I need to be charged.
Parthenon: Right!!
Robin: Is…isn’t that the wreckage of Motorman, who was defeated by Ramenman earlier?
Suguru: What exactly is he doing with that thing?
Bike: You should know that this Choujin called Motorman possesses giant batteries for both his hands; these batteries store still a comparative excess of electrical power, even after many hundreds of matches.

57.
Bike: I think you understand this, but the reason this puny Choujin Motorman is on Team Zebra and is participating in this fight isn’t to crush you of Team Kinnikuman…
Bike: He’s participating with Team Zebra as a small power-source device for my charging up----!!
Robin: What’s that---!?
Suguru: So then, Team Zebra planned to fight us as a quartet without expecting on the help of Motorman’s battle potential from the start!!
Robin: So then Zebra is saying that Bikeman was confident in demonstrating his true power as a Choujin duo.
Bike: Hahaha, my energy is filling up.
Announcer: Bikeman is rapidly sucking in the electricity from the batteries on Motorman’s hands, restoring his physical strength!!

58.
Ramen: Uaa…
Ramen: They’re off.
Ramen: Now! Prepare yourself, Bikeman!!
Announcer: Well, Ramenman has cut his Electric Rings by himself, charging at Bikeman who is in the middle of charging----!!
Ramen: Huh?
Bike: Sorry, my charging is complete!
Ramen: Aah!!

59.
Announcer: However, his opponent Bikeman, who is aiming for Ramenman, is above him---!!
Bike: Kill the Skydive---!!
Ramen: Guhe!!
Zebra: Good, Bikeman: if you’re not impatient, then Ramenman like that is a true-power Choujin whom you can keep away from; keep attacking prudently in that tone---!!

60.
Bike: It’s been a long time since I’ve had trouble with a spirited man, but I won’t show mercy anymore……
Ramen: It’s…great that you’re eager, but the…Thunderdome, your personal road, is filled with puddles with the tears of sadness of the audience, and isn’t use…able…
Suguru: Ri…right, Bikeman: it’s over for you since you can’t drive---!!
Bike: Really, these Justice Choujin worry with only one way of thinking…if I can’t use my road, then its better that I create another, separate road!
Suguru: What!?
Bike: Electric Ring---!!

61.
Announcer: An innumerable amount of electric fragments emitted from both of Bikeman’s hands are uniting, slowly making up a massive circular road----!!
Ramen: You…can’t be creating a road with electricity.
Bike: How’s that—continuing from the Thunderdome, this is my new personal road: The Superloop Road!!

62.
Bike: Ramenman, the place of your death will be here---!!
Announcer: Ramenman has been thrown in the middle of the Superloop Road; so then, what will Bikeman be doing here----!!
Bike: Motorcycle Change!!
Bike: Hya—hahaha----!!
Ramen: Uwa—my…arms~~~~!!
Suguru: Ramenman

63.
Bike: Fufufufu: Ramenman, your golden arms that have caused many problems have been broken. However, now I’m not finishing with just your arms!!
Announcer: Buzzsaws are jumping out from Bikeman’s tires---!!
Bike: Hahhahaha: Buzzsaw Drive!!
Announcer: Somehow now he’s planning to rip apart Ramenman’s body---!!
Ramen: It’s easy for me to escape from here…however, if I ran away now, it will be abandoning the match and he’ll become a problem for Kinnikuman and Robin who are left……

64.
Suguru: Ramenman! Don’t worry about my Throne Succession: think about your own life now---!!
Ramen: Somehow I want that wonderful clumsy Choujin to succeed to the Throne of Planet Kinniku…however, my arms can’t stop his attack like this……
Ramen: That’s it: even if I can’t do anything to stop his attack, I can defeat his attack if I use a tactic on the Loop Road!!
Bike: Die----!!
Ramen: Mobius Band Ki—ck!!

65.
Bike: What!?
Announcer: Ramenman has kicked a section of the Loop Road, twisting it; creating a Mobius band with no differentiation of back and front----!!

66.
(SCRAMBLE FOR THE KINNIKU THRONE ARC)
SPECIAL VTR XXXII
RAMENMAN VS. BIKEMAN

TN:
(The script seems to open a few minutes after the last one: Ataru is sitting on one side, with the Pokemon Mewtwo sitting on another. In the middle, a small Jolteon is staring directly at Mewtwo, growling and giving off barks in it's own weird language)

Mewtwo: (through telepathy) Can you please explain to me what you've just pulled, peon?

Ataru: If you try that stunt again, I'm ordering this handy Jolteon I rented to use Pin Missile...that's how I handled Psychic types in the first game and I'm not afraid to do it again!

Mewtwo: Why not just use a Dark-type like all the other people out there? You know they are immune to Psychic-types.

Ataru: Hey, this was a last-minute thing and I was thinking Generation I means for Generation I Pokemon. Dark types didn't exist at the time so give me a break.

Jolteon: (barks)

Mewtwo: Let's just get this over with so we can finish up.

Ataru: Got it. (properly) Hey there...I sort of have a special guest with me today thanks to...well, what just happened in the last couple chapters of the Ramenman/Bikeman fight. Coming all the way from the Unknown Dungeon in Kanto, the clone Legendary that actually is a legitimate clone, Mewtwo!

Mewtwo: Do you have to rub in the clone part? That is what I can't stand about you humans and your one-track mind.

Jolteon: (barks)

Mewtwo: And you stay out of this!

Jolteon: (whimpers)

Ataru: Anyway, this chapter sort of continues the disaster that started in the previous one that seemed a whole like our guest's film appearance. As you may recall, Ramenman revived at the end of the last chapter in a way that seemed just outlandish. But when we get the explanation in this chapter, it just gets worse.

Mewtwo: Unfortunately the writers of this series were just like the writers of the movie I was in where the same situation happens: a heroic character gets caught in something dying, then everyone around them starts to cry magical tears that some-such somehow or another revives the main character teaching everyone around them a valuable lesson, blah blah blah.

Ataru: But didn't you learn a lesson from when Ash...er, Satoshi...er, what's his name revive after all the real and clone Pokemon did that?

Mewtwo: I said it before: it was the worst part of the movie! None of it made sense: how the heck can tears of love and comfort bring people back to life? I get someone seeming to die but he was literally turned to stone! And the last I heard, Pokemon tears are not Healing Wish or Recover and they don't work on humans!

Ataru: But what about the lesson you learned about...

Mewtwo: Just stick to the chapter, I really don't want to get into that part.

Jolteon: (barks)

Mewtwo: I didn't say anything wrong you know!

Ataru: As I said in the previous chapter, this feels a bit like an attempt to sort of bring a fairy-tail quality to Ramenman due to his popularity and just to keep him around through the Bikeman fight. The problem is that there is a difference between using it in a fairy tale and using it in a series that is supposed to be about American superheroes. In a fairy tale, it works and can be seen as just the intervention of forces beyond our control. In Kinnikuman...it's just wrong.

Mewtwo: Has the writer and artist of this series done anything like this before?

Ataru: Want me to pull out the list? I got an extremely long one!

Mewtwo: I doubt so anymore.

(As the camera goes down, Jolteon is seen ripping the entire list Ataru prepared with the topic "Every screw-up Yudetamago has ever done through the run of Kinnikuman" to shreds")

Ataru: Hey, you're not supposed to do that!

Mewtwo: You shouldn't have brought him with you know.

Ataru: Hey, I'm the one who brought him with!

Mewtwo: Not much of a guard after all.

Ataru: (gives up) Well he can have it, I'll reprint it later. Anyhow, that really wasn't just my only other problem with the chapter. I guess my other real main concern is the sudden transformation of Team Zebra...or as I really should call it, "Team Bikeman"! Yeah, I know Zebra was supposed to have brought all these guys together to be his so-called team, but look at how it's constructed: we have Bikeman, we have Parthenon, who is supplying gas to him (and let's not get into how soon enough)

Mewtwo: I supposed that so called god Arceus sent him to be there just because he was a laughing stock.

Ataru: You know of Arceus?

Mewtwo: You know how our franchise go: more Pokemon are introduced yet the characters act as if they were always there since day one.

Ataru: I know...

Jolteon: (whimpers)

Ataru: Anyway, then we got Motorman, who essentially was acknowledged once and for all not just as essentially a nobody-loser Choujin, but essentially only on the team...to supply energy for Bikeman if he runs out! It just seems bizarre that Bikeman, who is supposed to be working for Zebra, literally has his own pit-crew! Next you know, Zebra will be revealed to have been Bikeman's manager when he was still Powerfulman...and Manriki will be the repairer...then we can officially call this "Team Bikeman...with some Zebra-based Throne Candidate" or something.

Mewtwo: If they want to demonstrate power, why not just have a team that works together better instead of essentially one character who is basically backed up by four others?

Ataru: I'm not saying Zebra literally works for Bikeman but after all we've seen in this fight, I wouldn't really be surprised.

Mewtwo: Though this chapter does seem to make me intrigued and somewhat baffled by Ramenman. It was interesting he actually used Chinese for his attack.

Ataru: The "formerly known as Kowloon 'Jiulong Cheng Drop'"?

Mewtwo: I could destroy that easily considering it's a fighting move...er, but at the same time, he ends up using some convenient technique to defeat Bikeman such as one literally just to make a Mobius strip within the ring.

Ataru: I sort of wonder a bit about that considering I sort of had it going in a different direction...but I'll get to that next time.

Jolteon: (whimpers)

Mewtwo: You really should take him out, he's your rental.

Ataru: Just as long as you don't pull anything when I go away.

Mewtwo: I was getting bored anyhow. It's no fun talking about my stupidest moment.

Ataru: Alright, thanks for being here and I'll see you around, Mewtwo...(to himself) Though I always thought Lucario was cooler.

(Mewtwo suddenly turns and gives off an evil stare towards the translator, scaring him off and making him run with Jolteon)

Mewtwo: I seriously don't understand how you readers put up with this guy as your translator.