Eyeshield 21 207

Eyeshield21 207th Down

+ posted by Xophien as translation on Oct 26, 2006 23:31 | Go to Eyeshield 21

Yes, there it is, the slowest ever translation of ES21 you'll ever read ! Before you all jump on me with swords, axes, spoons and other really dangerous weapons, I have to say to translating a chapter is actually a lot of work ! You really have to try once to understand the hell most translators are going through (and since english isn't my native language it's even harder). But it's done, yatta ! :amuse

Of course feel free to criticize, I'm a n00b translator and Ineed as much feedback as possible in order to improve :amuse

Anyway, like always, feel free to use that for your scanlations, as long as you credit me, and also ThE_WoRm-sensei (or should I say senpai now ?) who was of great assistance and will probably make a list of all my mistakes soon enough in this topic ^^"

By the way, this is based on the HQ^^

Page 01

Sena : You said that the ballista
Sena : That Shin-san is
Sena : Playing offense!!?
Kurita : Who could stop that

Shin : Eyeshield 21
Shin : With this, were in the same situation.

Shin : Both of us play offense and defense.
Shin : All of this match will be
Shin : The stage for us to settle this!!
Left : Ballista, this full picture is!!

Page 02-03 (double page)

Top right : 207th down The one who aims to be number one
Right : Speaking of autumn its school festival !! Eat, look around and play ! After that, replenish your energy before the fierce battle !!
(Top left seems to be random shouts of excitement about the color pages and left is some kind of announcement for an illustration collection)

Page 04

Empty in the HQ.

Page 05

Sena : With the universitys golden generation as opponents
Sena : They scored 20 points!!

Hiruma : Ke ke ke, the real problem isnt that.
Hiruma : Just have a look at all the zeros on the score board.

Hiruma : During the Ballista, they throw most of their power into offense.
Hiruma : So their invincible defensive strength would normally weaken, but
Hiruma : On the contrary, it gets better.

Hiruma : The Oujou White Knights
Hiruma : During all the matches of this tournament
Hiruma : They havent let anyone score a touchdown against them!

Page 06

Wakana : The public practice of the Oujou White Knights is taking place at the sports ground.
Wakana : And theres a corner to experience amefuto !

Page 07

Someone : Incredible !!

Someone : Oooh over there too its incredible !

Page 08

Sena&Monta : Incrediiiible !

Shougun : What is he wearing, this guy
Takami : Well, this is A penalty game saying that hell take part in the maid tea house
Takami : But because we had a public practice it was made so he only had to wear the clothes or something

Shougun : Its completely moeing (for those who dont know what moe is : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moe_%28slang%29 ^^)
Takami : Shougun knows some weird words !!

Sena : This is horrible
Monta : I've never seen something as disgusting as this...

Page 09

Girls : Sakuraba-
Girls : kyuuuuuun !!
Girls : Super cute !
Girls : Ero cute !!

Sakuraba : Why must I do my receiver practice in this outfit.

Kurita : This fits him quite amazingly
Sanzo : As expected from a former model <3

Sena : Hn ?
Sena : Just now, was that Sanzo-san?
Monta : Shinryuujis transvestite ?
Kuroki : Was he really here ?

Page 10

Sena : Is this... the visitors are throwing the balls
Sena : So that Oujous players catch them ?
Monta : Its a practice and a performance at the same time.

Boys : Theres a really weird guy here !
Boys : Dressed like a woman !

Monta : He is the most popular, the maid

Sakuraba : Jus
Sakuraba : Wait
Sakuraba : Jus

Hiruma : Kekeke fucking monkey
Hiruma : I think you probably know that, but
Hiruma : This guy will be your opponent in the next match.

Page 11

Sena : Could it be

Sena & Suzuna :How can you lack so much of control !?

Someone : Woh !
Someone : So high !!

Page 12

Nothing

Page 13

Hiruma : This height just now
Hiruma : Can you reach it ?

Monta : No
Monta : Even with my jump at height MAX
Monta : I wouldnt even touch it with my fingertips.

Page 14

Monta : Wooops !!

Page 15

Torakichi : Wow !
Torakichi : Incredible catch!!

Monta : Mukiiiatch all of a sudden !
Monta : But
Monta : Who sent such a beautifully rotating ball just now

Someone : Unsui
Someone : -san?

Page 16

Unsui : For the sake of next year
Unsui : I said we had to see Oujou, who hasnt any disadvantages, but...

Unsui : Ikkyuu is currently training.
Unsui : He didnt come even though I asked.
Unsui : He said he couldnt forgive himself for losing to Monta-kun.

Unsui : Ikkyuu also understands himself
Unsui : That four receivers came to be better than the others in this era in Kantou.

Page 17

Unsui : The master of the reverse run
Unsui : Possessing pre-eminent senses in motion abilities
Unsui : Hosokawa Ikkyuu

Unsui : The one who won an hard-fought battle again Ikkyuu
Unsui : Who showed us the proof he was number one in catching
Unsui : Raimon Tarou

Unsui : The one awarded with the title of Tokyos best receiver
Unsui : The invincible heavy train with unmatched accuracy
Unsui : Tetsuma Jou

Unsui : And
Unsui : The other Tokyos best receiver
Unsui : With the Everest pass flying over everyone else
Unsui : Sakuraba Haruto

Torakichi : What are you saying !
Torakichi : There arent four better than the others !
Torakichi : Sakuraba is definitely number one !!

Torakichi : He isnt the lame receiver he once was !
Torakichi : Hes the real deal
Torakichi : The Ace Sakuraba !!

Sakuraba : Torakichi
Sakuraba : I am not Oujous Ace.
Sakuraba : Shin is.

Page 18

Sakuraba : At least
Sakuraba : For now.

Torakichi : Sakuraba!

Monta : You arent anything like I expected
Monta : Is speaking honestly annoying you ?
Monta : Lame receiver !!

Page 19
Unsui : Sakuraba
Unsui : They are kinda similar
Unsui : My situation and yours.

Unsui : The geniuses that were infront of our eyes and could never be surpassed
Unsui : For me, it was Agon.
Unsui : For you,
Unsui : It was Shin.

Unsui : The limits of an average person.
Unsui : I had to accept it.
Unsui : I choosed to make myself useful to Agon before thinking of me.

Unsui : So I wonder why
Unsui : You

Page 20

Hanada : Well, we really failed in this match !
Hanada : Its a complete defeat for the golden generation !
Hanada : There is nothing to do against Shin playing both sides.

Hanada : To think that emotional guy, the weak Sakuraba
Hanada : Has grown up so much

Shougun : Hanada.
Shougun : Youre wrong.

Shougun : When they first joined the club
Shougun : There was no one as extraordinary than Shin.
Shougun : I personally didnt think there would be someone to compare with him.

Shougun : But Sakuraba was the only one.
Shougun : He was always chasing after Shin.

Shougun : Although he had nausea
Shougun : Although he was in pain
Shougun : Although he understood that even he himself can't escape it
Shougun : This guy has
Shougun : The strongest spirit in Oujou !

Page 21

Someone : His ambition that can't be broken even when he wants it to break.
Someone : Because it is strong
Someone : He kept struggling!!

Sakuraba : I, unlike you, Unsui,
Sakuraba : am not smart enough to calmly accept reality.
Sakuraba : Thats why.
Unsui : This thing
Unsui : Makes me so envy I want to cry!

Sakuraba : The four best receivers
Sakuraba : Thats what you said.

Sakuraba : Its wrong.
Sakuraba : As Torakichi said
Sakuraba : Ill become the best.

Page 22

Sakuraba : The one who won against Hosogawa Ikkyuu
Sakuraba : Ill defeat Raimon Tarou !

Monta : Sena
Monta : I must return immediately to do a special training.
Sena : Yes!

Someone : Sakurabas
Someone : super-high Everest pass counter-plan!

Page 23

Doburoku : Woo whats happening ?
Hiruma : It is time for you to sober up !
Monta : A counter-plan for the Everest Pass !
Monta : Please teach us a special training !!

Hiruma : We have only three days to also think of a counter-plan for the ballista.
Doburoku : Dont say such unreasonable things !

Doburoku : well
Doboroku : To grant those absurd requests
Doburoku : Its the trainers job after all.

Sena : Ma
Sena : sk??

Left : To get a little stronger before the day of the decisive battle !!

Edit : changed a few things based on what Worm-senpai said^^"

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[Permalink]

Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Thanks for the translation dude.....
atleast we are able to understand what are they talking about for now
Cant wait for the scanalation to come out...
thanks again

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

thanks a lot.
i want to know what the counter-plan for the everest pass is gonna be. :fan

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Thanks.

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Finished!!! :P Here is some notes for you, there are some, and if you don't understand some, just say and I'll answer. Most of them are not that critical.

Well, I want to say that I'm against calling him Shogun :P His name is ショーぐん　- Meaning, "Shougun" (Like the great shougun :P)

Wakana : Its a corner to experience amefuto !
-- wakana : And there is a corner to experience amefuto ! (mo arimasu)

Takami : Well, this is A maid outfit he wears because of a punishment game
Takami : He said hed wear it during the public practice and it became like this

-- Takami : Well, this is A panelty game (like used in old chapters :P) saying he'll take part in the maid tea house (meido kissa)
-- Takami : But because he has a public practice (aru kara) it was made so he'll only wear the cloths or something...

Monta : Lets pretend we didnt see this disgusting thing
-- Monta: I've never seen something as disgusting as this... (koto nai = didn't have that experience)

Girls : Ultra cute !!
-- Girls : Sexualy (Ero) cute !!

Sena : Is this... the visitors are throwing the balls
-- Sena : The visitors are throwing the balls like that (korette)

Monta : He is the most popular, the maid
--- Monta: The maid is very popular... (daininki = very popular) And it's good to change order of sentence in here

Unsui : I said we had to see Oujou, who hasnt any disadvantages.
-- Unsui : I said we had to see Oujou, who hasnt any disadvantages, but...

Unsui : The invincible heavy train with unmatched punctuality
-- Unsui : The invincible heavy train with unmatched accuracy

Unsui : The other Tokyos best receiver
-- Unsui : On the same Tokyo's best receivers

Unsui : With the Everest pass flying over everyone else
-- Unsui : Jumping higher than anyone else with the Everest Pass

Sakuraba : At least
Sakuraba : For now.
That part "Ima ha ne" Litteraly means "Now, that is", but this was for your decision only :P
-- Sakuraba: For now
-- Sakuraba: That is

Unsui : We were always watching geniuses who absolutely surpass us.
-- Unsui : The geniuses that were infront of our eyes and could never be surpassed ("Koerarenai" - Can't be surpassed)

Unsui : I couldnt accept it.
-- Unsui : I had to accept it. (Shikanai - Couldn't but)

Unsui : So I wonder why
-- Unsui : Although that (Nanoni) why...

Hanada : Iyaa, we really failed in this match !
-- Hanada : Well, we really failed in this match !

Hanada : That emotional guy, the weak Sakuraba
Hanada : He has grown up
-- Hanada : To think (usually what to ha in end of sentences mean) that that emotional guy, the weak Sakuraba
-- Hanada : Has grown up this much

Shogun : When he first joined the club
-- Shogun : When they (as Shin and Sakuraba joined together) first joined the club

Shogun : Although he had nausea
Shogun : Although he was in pain
-- Shogun : Even while he had nausea
-- Shogun : Even while he was in pain

Shogun : I understood very well myself
-- (The sentence you asked) Shogun: Although he understood that even he himself can't escape it (nukenu = nukenai)

Shogun : Oujous strongest spirit !
-- Shogun : The strongest spirit in Oujou !

Someone : He didnt give up because of his own ambition.
-- Shogun: His ambition that can't be broken (orenu = orenai) even when he wants it to break (Oritakutomo = Oritakute mo)

Someone :He was already strong
Someone : and kept struggling!!
-- Shogun: Because it is strong (kara koso)
-- He struggles...!!

Sakuraba : am not smart enough to accept reality.
-- Sakuraba : am not smart enough to calmly (reisei ni) accept reality.

Unsui : To me, this
Unsui : lamenting is enviable!
-- Unsui: This thing
-- Unsui: Makes me so envy I want to cry (Hodo in this place "To the level", by the way, lamenting? Ara? ^^")

Sakuraba : The one who won against Hosogawa Ikkyuu
Sakuraba : Ill defeat Raimon Tarou !
-- Change order of sentences so it'll sound more english like ^^"

Someone : Sakurabas
Someone : super-high Everest pass counter-plan!
-- Someone : A special training on (the "wo" means something not said, it can't be neglected in english)
-- Someone : A counter-plan to Sakuraba's super-high Everest pass!

Doburoku : Uoo whats happening ?
-- Doburoku : Woo (make it more english like sounds, but that's for next time) What is it?

Monta : Please make us do a special training !!
-- Monta : Please teach (oshieru) us a special training for it !!

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Quote:

Girls : Ultra cute !!
-- Girls : Sexualy (Ero) cute !!

I knew that but it just seemed too weird in english so I wondered for a while how to translate that...

Quote:

Sakuraba : At least
Sakuraba : For now.
That part "Ima ha ne" Litteraly means "Now, that is", but this was for your decision only :P
-- Sakuraba: For now
-- Sakuraba: That is

It means the same thing and I thought "At least for now" was kinda cooler, but As you said it's a matter of personnal taste^^"

I'll edit my post for the other big mistakes (though there are not as much as I feared^^")[br]Posted on: October 27, 2006, 12:07:06 PM_________________________________________________First post edited^^

Oh, about the Shogun/Shougun, it's just that it lost the u when it came in occident (just like Tokyo which is actually Toukyou...) It's true that I should keep the real one (Shougun), but I'm quite used to the other so it's hard to think to put that damn u in it^^ I'll try :amuse

Thanks again for your advices Worm-senpai, I'll try to be better next time ^^" (hopefully it'll be a standard 19pages chapter without Shougun or Unsui making speeches XD)

[Permalink]

Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Unsui giving speechs is fine, but Shougun is a old dude, meaning he goes "Nu" instead of "Nai" and many other weird things :P I hate it when torakichi talks, by the way.

You can say "Eroticly" too, but not ultra, as it is a fetish kinda sentence, and ultra doesn't cut down into fetishes :P

By the way, I didn't note the title of the chapter, I would go with "Those who aim at number 1", Which is kinda similar to what you chose but with one difference, which is how you catch the "mono", you can interupt it as "Sakuraba" (one) or, Sakuraba, Monta and Ikkyou (many).

And about senpai/sensei, it's your choise to make :P welcome to the translators group

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Quote by The Worm:

By the way, I didn't note the title of the chapter, I would go with "Those who aim at number 1", Which is kinda similar to what you chose but with one difference, which is how you catch the "mono", you can interupt it as "Sakuraba" (one) or, Sakuraba, Monta and Ikkyou (many).

Well, given it was mostly a Sakuraba-only chapter, I translated it as "the one who" because it seemed more logical^^

And "Eroticly cute" just seem another insanely weird thing to scream (well, I can't say Sakuraba's fans are sane but...). I think I'm gonna make that "Ero cute" after all, though it's still weird, it's comprehensible and easy to scream^^

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

I just read your translation pretty good for a first time. Although I would like to you about your translation(s). You should remember grammar, this includes spelling I noticed you misspelled one or two words. Secondly remember the part of speech and who is saying it. For example you usally wont see a teacher using slang or a thug using word such as commodious which means spacious and convenient. The rest is just stuff I noticed from a quick read of the translation, trust me i'm no god of english. I have a current grade of 94 ~.~, but you can take it or leave it, Thanks for the translation btw.

Both of us will be playing offense and defense. (Mine just sounds more of a looking forward to the game line, yours sounded weird to me ~.~) – Page 1

On the contrary, it gets stronger. (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/stronger #12) - Page 5

During all of the matches in this tournament they haven’t let anyone score a single touchdown against them. (“Against” could also be “On”. I reworded the sentence yours was grammatically correct but sounded awkward.) – Page 5

It’s a chance to experience American football. (You didn’t translate it or didn’t want to, I reworded the sentence.) – Page 6
Sidenote: アメフト - amefuto, is short for, アメリカンフットボール - amerikanfuttobōru atleast to my knowledge which means american football.

What is he wearing, that guy. (unsure of my way, but it sounds correct to me.) – Page 8

Well, that’s… A maid’s outfit he’s wearing because of the punishment game… (Unsure of my way, but it sounds correct to me.) - Page 8

I choose to make myself useful to Agon before thinking of me. (choosed isn’t a word sorry) - Page 19

To think that the weak and emotional Sakuraba - Page 20

His ambition can’t be broken even when he wants it to break. (Yours was a fragment ~.~) - Page 21

I unlike you, Unsui, am not smart enough to calmly accept reality. (No need for first comma to my knowledge) – Page 21

Makes me so envious I want to cry… ! (Part of speech) – Page 21

P.S. I didn't read worms corrections/advice. Anways if you continue you translate Xophien i'll try to clean and typeset for you if you want. I can't guarantee i'll be done on thursday but atleast by friday night. Starting with next weeks that is.

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Well, the problem is that since english isn't my native language, I'm bound to make weird mistakes. I do have a good knowledge of english (it's actually my best subject), but I'm lacking practice, and that makes translating japanese into proper english kinda hard (I think I spend more time trying to make the translation sound good than actually understanding it).

It's true that the characters all have differents ways of speaking, Sena being really formal, Hiruma using slang, Shougun speaking old japanese and Torakichi being overall insanely hard to understand. Unfortunately, my knowledge of old english and slang being what it is (those are things we aren't being taught at school^^), I'm truly sorry but I think I'll have to give up on that^^" I already have enough trouble for now actually figuring what Hiruma says, if I must make him talk in slang, it'd take days to release the translations^^ I'll do the most that I can, of course, but I'd rather make a translation where everyone is speaking in everyday english, and leave the "slangization" of the sentences to the scanlator if he wants to. Of course, I'm only beginning my translator career, so I may one day have enough skills to make accurate translations of Shougun's weird habit of saying "nu" instead of "nai" XD

And thanks for the things you pointed out, some of my mistakes were made probably because I was worrying if I got the proper meaning (like the "choosed", it's a mistake I don't usually make), and I'll try not to make again the others. Critics are always welcomed :amuse

Almost forgot, I decided to leave amefuto untranslated for two reasons :
1) It's shorter so fits more easily for scanlations.
2) American football is different from Amefuto, in Amefuto you have 2 meters tall highschool freshmen, other freshmen who run 40 yards in 4.2 secs, and even freshmanosaurs who lift 200kg at the benchpress (Gaouuu :darn). I don't know much about real American Football but I guess it doesn't have chestnut-headed linemen and pointy-eared quarterbacks either :amuse

[Permalink]

Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Quote by Xophien :

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Posted on Oct 27, 2006

Help is always welcome, at least till I am used enough to translating and not making mistakes anymore :amuse

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Posted on Oct 28, 2006

...wow... O.o; *is barely a japanese beginner* THANKS TO THE MAX, GUYS!!! ALL OF YOU!!! ^__^ *bows* Reeeeeeally appreciate it!

Btw, Xophien, that signature of yours.. were those 2 pages of Kerberos ever translated? If so, where? I really liked it! =D

[Permalink]

Posted on Oct 28, 2006

Quote by OS.Hoshi :

Btw, Xophien, that signature of yours.. were those 2 pages of Kerberos ever translated? If so, where? I really liked it! =D

I did a french scanlation for friends at the time, so I can put it in english, but since it's the first translation I ever made it might not be really accurate :amuse I'm gonna work on it^^[br]Posted on: October 28, 2006, 11:47:25 PM_________________________________________________Something like that :amuse

Page 01
Page 02

He's just too cute when he goes Kyun Kyuun :darn

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Posted on Oct 28, 2006

YAH~!!!!! Thanks, dude!!! ^____^

..woah, "nobody knows what happened" is right! 8D

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Posted on Oct 29, 2006

Quote:

Page 14

Monta : Uootto !!

"Uootto" can actually be translated as something like "Oh, my" or something like that.

Quote:

Page 20

Hanada : Iyaa, we really failed in this match !

"Iyaa" = "Iya" = No (etc). But here it means something like "Well, we really failed..."

Just so that it clears some confusion...

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Posted on Oct 29, 2006

Well, Uootto is more like "Wooops"

and well, I wrote that that Iyaa is Well, didn't you change it, Xophien? :P

[Permalink]

Posted on Oct 29, 2006

Quote by Soushio:

"Uootto" can actually be translated as something like "Oh, my" or something like that.

I couldn't find any satisfying way to translate it ("oh, my" just doesn't sound cool :blink), "Wooops" seems great so I'll take that :amuse

Quote by Soushio:

"Iyaa" = "Iya" = No (etc). But here it means something like "Well, we really failed..."

Same here, the best way to translate the "Iyaa" here would probably be by "Well", but the Iyaa also means he's quite ashamed, which "well, we really failed in this match !" just wouldn't show, so I hesitated about it for a while, and decided to keep the "Iyaa", which was probably not the best choice. Japanese just has a lot of weird words like that that are hard to translate without losing something in the process... Maybe when I'll be more used to it I'll have less troubles choosing between translating or not^^"

Quote by The Worm:

and well, I wrote that that Iyaa is Well, didn't you change it, Xophien? :P

Iyaa, I didn't even see that Oo I"m gonna hide myself :paperbag

Anyway, thanks for your remarks, I appreciate all the help I can get :amuse

[Permalink]

Posted on Nov 2, 2006

Quote:

I couldn't find any satisfying way to translate it ("oh, my" just doesn't sound cool )

I agree. It makes him sound like a girl. I never found a better term for it either. I think I used "that was close" or something before, though I forgot where I used it though...It's fun to translate, but sometimes painful...*sigh*. Especially phrasing it into the bubbles...But we'll get used to it somehow...:D

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Eyeshield 21 207

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