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Translations: One Piece 901 by cnet128 , Gintama 679 by kewl0210

Gintama 500

Is everyone truly seeing the same world reflected in their eyes?

+ posted by Bomber D Rufi as translation on Jul 6, 2014 04:22 | Go to Gintama

-> RTS Page for Gintama 500

And lesson 500. I'd like to thank the people who read the weekly whining sessions that my comments end up being on this series. If Sorachi doesn't kill me, or my own mass of evil thoughts doesn't eventually find it's way to Japan and kill him, lets hope that Gintama will keep on going strong.

Hi wa mata noboru only.

Also, this is relevant to your interests.

(Side text- Congrats!! This is the serial’s 500th lesson!)
(Sign- Kabuki cho athletics meet.)
{And now would the Red team and White team line up please?}
{The first match in the Kabuki cho athletics meet is…}
{The ball toss!!}
{Until I wore these glasses…}
{I had no idea…}

Dude: The enemies on the white team have dwindled down to three because of food poisoning!
It’s an easy win!!
Spirits: Victory for our masters!!
Us Guardian spirits will lead the red team to victory!!
{Behind us humans are…}
{Beings known as guardian spirits exist unseen, guiding the natural state of things.}
Kagura: It is a shame that our partners are out due to food poisoning. But that prize of 500,000 yen will be ours.
Gintoki: It’s what they get for mocking an athletics meet. Now should we put our all into this and show them how it’s done?
{I had no idea…}
Pikachu: 500,000 huh?
If master has a paycheck like that then I’d be able to drink as much shochuu as I want.
(Sign- Before paychecks comes paying the rent.
Pikachu: Man oh man. So we’ve even gotta step in and make sure the masters have a place to stay? Bein’ a guardian spirit is hard work.
{That these guardian sprits are what support our lifestyles all without people knowing a thing.}

Announcer: Well then! Game start!!
(Sfx- Piiii wheeeee)
(Sfx- Kuwaaaah roaaar)
Kid: Ahaahah!
Awwright! We ain’t gonna lose to some white team!
Kid2: Huh? Hey Take-chan, your face is sorta red
Take: Huh? What? Whats that?
{I had no idea…}
{That on the underside of this athletics meet…on the underside of this world..}
{That these guys…the guardian spirits are always locked in constant deathmatches!!}
Lesson 500: Is everyone truly seeing the same world reflected in their eyes?
(Side text- And there you have it, the introduction to the 500th lesson!)

(Sfx- Kuwaaaah roaaaaar)
Otose: Having informal gatherings like this from time to time isn’t a bad thing.
{In what way is this an informal gathering?}
{Beside the smiling faces of children tossing balls at each other…}
{World of the living.}
{World of the guardian spirits.}
{Are the white eyeballs of the guardian spirits as they go flying!!}
(Sfx- Gyaaaaahhhh)
{The people done in by the guardian spirits are dropping to the ground one after another…}
Guy: Hey! What’s the matter?
Announcer: Whoa! The people falling out and retiring on the red team due to poor condition only increases!
This is a game, but everyone shouldn’t push themselves too much!
{I’m seeing a pretty incredible world here…}
{I’ve entered into an incredible world…}
{Who would have known that underneath the athletics meet that something like this existed?}
{Can I watch this hell unfurling in front of me and casually play toss the ball?}
{Please…someone take these cursed glasses off of me!!}
{I just want it to end! Just end this athletics meet from hell quickly!!}
Kagura: Huh.
This is strange, yes? I have been throwing the ball in for some time.
But it will not enter the basket, yes?

Gintoki: Now that you mention it, yeah.
Huh? Dude, my ball clearly went in just now but it was bounced back?
(Sfx- Gahh THok)
(Sfx- Gasuuh thk)
(Sfx- Shuuhh dshh)
Gintoki: Hey….what gives?
Kagura: It is as if someone we cannot see is in there, yes?
{Uh…there’s a spirit from some hell living in that baskeetttt!!}
{Hasegawa-saaaaan!!! Why are you theeeeeere!?}
Hasegawa: R—run…
Kagura: Uraaaah!!
Gintoki: Dude, it’s seriously not going in!
Hasegawa: W—wait…
{Heeeeey!! I know you guys can’t really see him, but Hasegawa-san is there!!}
Hasegawa: There’s an incredible guardian spirit…
On the red team…
A monster even to our enemies…
(Sfx- Dooooon Thooom)

Shinpachi: Wha….
{Gin-san’s guardian spiriiiiiiiittt!!!}
(Sfx- Bfuooohh blooorsh)
Kagura: Gin-chan!
(Sfx- gaku shiver)
Kagura: What is the matter? Shinpachiii!! Gin-chan has suddenly…
(Sfx- Peki bakii Crackle crackle)
Shinpachi: Kagura-chan!!
{No way…}
{No waaaaaaay!!}
Tae: Oh! Shin-chan!
What a coinky-dink!
Seems everyone is participating hmm?
In this athletics meet, I mean.

Tae: It is a shame that the enemy team has ended up this way, but..
But an athletics meet..
Is something everyone should participate in while following the rules and being fair to each other.
(Sfx- Ooooooohhhhhh)
(Sfx- Goaaahh gaaah)
(Sfx- Bun fwif)
(Sfx- Bun fwif)
(Sfx- Dokaaaaah thooook)

{Can anyone even allow the word fair to leave their lips when seeing thiiiiis?!}
People: Whooooaa!! They’re going in all at once!
{Her monster guardian spirit is elevating cheating to a super S class level!!}
{What the hell is thaaaaaat?!}
{Guardian spirit// Ankoku Senju Kanon.}
(TN- Darkness Thousand handed Kanon. Kanon is a Buddhist God of mercy. Or this is just a huge HXH parody. Or both. Your pick.}
{What kind of daily life would one have to live to be possessed by something that immense, sisteeeer?!}
{This is Shimura Tae’s guardian spirit. It is a mass of thousands of fried eggs she has burned and killed.}
(Handwritten- Oh dear, it’s burned again.)
{It’s the malice of fried eeeeggggsss?!}
{But wait, if the eggs were able to become that sorta thing, then the grudge they have must be huge right?!}
{Because of her actions the Ankoku Kanon has possessed her and fries anything she touches. She is ‘Cursed by dark matter.’}
(Handwritten- Even the fish got burned…)
{On top of that her ability to burn everything includes her little brother who she has to be responsible for since he can’t live on his own. This curse is known as the ‘Yamada Yuu’ curse.}
{Why’s the little brother –me, have to be cursed tooooo?!}
(TN- Yamada Yuu is an actress and model. Not sure what the joke here is.)
{BP 3450}
{Battle points?! What are those? What’s the deal with the crappy middle schooler system?!}
{However since her little brother is here, 2000 points are subtracted from the BP.}
{To what extent is the little brother a hindrance?! More than half of her BP is gone isn’t it?!}

{So wait that hand I barely got a glimpse of back then..}
{Was one of that thing’s thousand?!}
{Gin-san’s Asuraman and Kagura-chan’s Alchuu….}
{Have been killed in an instant!!}
{The master and the guardian spirit are of one heart and mind! In just a moment they’re barely able to breathe!}
(Sfx- Buru buru shiver shiver)
Kagura: Guuahh….have we been infected with food poisoning too…!?
{No one can win against that monster!!}
Tae: What’s this? I must have thrown too many and now there aren’t any more balls…Could you get us some more please, attendant?
(Sfx- Gara gara clatter clatter)
???: Hey now. If it’s balls you want, I’ve got plenty.
Tell me which ones you want. Red balls? White balls? Or…
G**d balls?
(TN- Golden balls…testicles.)
(Sfx- Zuboooohhh dooosh)
(Sfx- Paaaah fwaaaash)
{Guardian spirit// Kongou mantama Bosatsu//Guardian spirit of G**d balls.)
(TN- Golden Mantama Bodhissattva.)
{What kind of guardian spirit is thaaaaaat?!}

{Kondo Isao’s G**d ball guardian spirit which is also Shimura Tae’s guardian spirit’s guardian spirit.}
{The guardian spirit of the guardian spirit?! What the hell? So even the guardian spirit has a stalker?!}
{It is a mass of the thousands of egg spirits within the tissues Kondo killed.}
{What eggs!?}
{Because of his actions, his entire body is covered with a sticky substance and he becomes a pervert. This is known as the ‘Curse of stalking.}
{So his stalking the fault of the curse!?}
{Moreover his similarities to a Gorilla have….nothing to do with this curse at all.}
(Sfx- Uho uho.)
{If it isn’t related to the curse then don’t mention it!}
{GP (Gorilla points.) 9800.}
{Hey! What are Gorilla points?! It’s different than the earlier system isn’t it?!}
{However since Shimura Tae is here, the GP doubles.}
{The GP points doubled!? Don’t treat my sister as if she’s a Gorilla!!}
Guardian spirit: So which will it be? White? Red? Or G**d?
Which do you fancy?
Tae: Then I’ll…
(Sfx- Merii Grinnd)
(Sfx- Meriii Griiind)

(Sfx- Buchiiin dsshhh)
Tae: How about all of the balls?
(Sfx- Dogoooohhh thooom)
(Sfx- Bara bara bara clatter clatter)
(Sfx- Piiiii wheeeee)
Announcer: That’s it!
The Red team and white teams no longer have balls so it’s a tie!
{They tiiiiiiied?!}
{Thanks to that idiot, this whole thing was brought to a tiieeeee?!}
{On this side we’re completely wounded too! It’s only one match and things have ended up this way….at this rate the next game is…}
Shinpachi: Gin-san! Kagura-chan! Hang in there!!
There’s no need to push yourselves anymore!! Just drop out of this hellish athletics meet! You’ve done enough right?!

Gintoki: Don’t start spouting dumb crap now. That prize is staring me in the eye…as if some food poison is going to make me back down…
(Sfx- Zeehhh hhyuuu)
Announcer: The next game is a three legged obstacle course race!
Two teams will race down a course with various obsticles, and climb their way to the goals! Aim for the top everyone!
Gintoki: As you can hear, the next one is a cooperative game.
Although we’re feeling kinda like shit, if we help each other out we’ll figure a way through this.
(Sfx- Yoro yoro wobble wobble)
Shinpachi: Gin-san! Kagura-chan!
{The ones you need to help you out the most can’t!! Your guardian spirits have had it!}
{Dammit!! I’m the only one who can see them!! I have to do something or else…!!}
Shinpachi: Azuraman-san! Alchuu-san! Hang in there!!
You guys are guardian spirits right?! You can’t let your masters do this alone!!
Pikachu: Damn…I really screwed up…
Who woulda thought that the althetics meet would had a God guardian spirit at that level? I’m glad I didn’t get too hammered.}
(Sign- It appears we’ve no choice but to get serious.)
Pikachu: Yeah, looks like we’re gonna have to go with ‘that’.
Shinpachi: ‘That’? So you have something in mind?!
Alchuu: If our masters are going to do a three legged race..
Then us guardian spirits..
Will do the same.
(Sfx- Kaaah sheeeen)

Shinpachi: Fusion?
{Guardian fusion is when several guardian spirits combine their spiritual power and take on an even stronger appearance.}
(Sfx- Doooonn fwoooom)
{Asuraman and Alchuu will combine into a being who doesn’t just protect Sakata Gintoki and Kagura….}
(Sfx- GOooohhhh fwoooom)
{But something that protects the Yorozuya…}
{A ‘Guardian God’.}
(Sfx- Paraaah clatter)
(Sfx- Gazaaan sheen)
{Guardian God// Madao.}
(TN- It phonetically reads ‘Madao’ But the kanji are different than the norm.)

{A new being was born due to a single fly being mixed in during the guardian fusion, accidently giving birth to this Guardian God. Which is to say it currently does not have an occupation.}
{Upon uniting the three have also fused their powers. So now he is unemployed, an Alchuu, and can only speak with a white board.}
(Sign- Urrrgh.)
{BP 32000.}
{It’s only their BP that’s obscenely high!! Though if one could figure out how to use them they might become a really strong guardian spirit!}
{However their will to work wanes during the day. Minus 31999 BP.}
{Which means they’re useless essentially 365 days of the year!}
Announcer: Well then! Is everyone ready?
Shinpachi: Oh crap! The next game is going to begin!
Announcer: Start the three legged obstacle course race!
(Sfx- Kuwaaaah roaaar)

{What the heck is up with this sickening game?!}
(Sfx- Uzo uzo shift shift)
(Sfx- Uzo uzo shfft sffft)
{Can it still be called a three legged race with these fundamental moves?! Are the guardian spirits catapillars?!}
{But we might have a chance of winning this!}
{After all the Guardian God Madao has four legs and enough size for a person to ride him!}
(Sfx- Zuri zuri sfft sfft)
Announcer: Every one of the three legged race teams are moving simultaneously!! However the white team hasn’t moved from the starting point at all.
{I thought that was your face but that’s actually the feet?!}
{Moving this way, they’ll never reach the goal in 100 years!!}
{Get off of there!! Get off of there immediately!!}
(Sfx- Zuri sfft)
(Sign- Hey taxi.)

(Sfx- kikii reeeh)
Katsura: What are you doing over there Gintoki? Leader?
If you’d like, how about hopping a ride in my Guardian spirit?
{Guardian spirit// Not a Corolla, but Katsura.}
{Katsura Kotarou’s guardian spirit They actually met in a traffic accident which split his soul into two…one part entered the Corolla, and the other was sent to hell. The Corolla has managed to survive in this body without further problems.}
{Whatddya mean without further problems?! He’s essentially missing half of his soul isn’t he?!}
(Sfx- pekoh droop)
{Since then, the decommissioned vehicle’s spirt has always remained at his side serving as his means for emergency flight. This is where the moniker ‘Runaway Kotarou’ came from.}
{Runaway Kotarou ran away in a Corolla?!}

{In exchange for this power the Corolla is dragged by Katsura’s hair roots ans stretched to a point of overuse, way past their limits. This is known as the ‘Not Zura, but Katsura’ curse.}
(Sfx- Mishi mishi grrinnd)
{He’s always in an extreme situation like that?! Is that why he always does the whole ‘Not Zura but Katsura’ shtick?!}
Katsura: What’s wrong Gintoki? Are you going to get on or not?!
Gintoki: Um…what and where are we riding?
Katsura: I see..right now we are the enemies of the white team since we’re on the red team right?
Well then I’ll wait for you at the goal.
(Sfx- Buunn vrmmmm)
Announcer: Whooa! It seems one pair on the Red team has taken the top of the race at blinding speed!
They’re just blowing past all the obstacles and flying straight ahead!!
(Sfx- Dogaashaaah ddsshhh)
(Sfx- Doka thoook)
(Sfx- Bakii Crackle)
{Is that even possible?! In this obstacle course, those two are the biggest obstacles!!}
(Sfx- Pisshh sddsh)
(Sfx- Dooooon booooom)
Announcer: Aaah! Something exploded!!
They’re in the charm area! To keep bothersome beings from getting involved there was a charm area installed!
(Side text- The spirit battle continues….)

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Jul 7, 2014 500 en kewl0210

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