Naruto 419

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Naruto
#419: Descent
[side text: "Pain" such as only a god can bring... Pain invades Konoha!!!]
Deva!Pain: We will now split into two teems: the diversion, and the investigation team. // Providing the distraction: the Asura Path, // the Beast Path, // and the Preta Path. // Investigating, the Deva Path, // the Human Path, // and the Naraka Path.
[TN: Each named after one of the Buddhist six paths of suffering, the six different possible rebirths. Naturally, their names are in Japanese, but I'm rendering them in their usual English forms (ie. mostly from the Sanskrit). A "deva" is a superhuman being, usually inhabiting a heaven-like realm. An "asura" is a kind of wrathful demigod. A "preta" is a kind of eternally-suffering ghost. And "Naraka" is the Buddhist equivalent of Hell. I think "Beast" and "Human" are fairly self-explanatory :p]

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Deva!Pain: Konan, you're with the investigation team.
Konan: Understood.
Deva!Pain: Konoha is surrounded by a great round barrier, encompassing both the air above and the earth below.
Konan: So anybody who enters without permission will be immediately detected...

3
Deva!Pain: As planned, we will hurl the Beast Path into the air above Konoha. // This will mislead them about our numbers and thus confuse them. // We will then stand by to be summoned by the Beast Path.
Konoha: Surely Itachi and Kisame entered the village undetected...?
Deva!Pain: Itachi was once a member of Konoha's ANBU. / He was aware of the proper methods of penetrating the barrier undetected. // I, however, will do things my own way.

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SageGuy: ! // An intruder!
Shinobi: !
SageGuy: The intruder is alone. His location is I-B, by the west gate.

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Deva!Pain: Move out!!

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People: What...? // Guahh!

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People: Aaghhhh!! // Wha - ?! // They're everywhere! / What's going on?! Wasn't the intruder supposed to be alone? // I'll use my Byakugan to assess the situation!! // Hurry! The barrier team alone aren't going to be enough! / Send word to the other teams and request immediate backup! // And send word to the Hokage-sama! Now!!

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Human!Pain: No knowledge of the Kyuubi, huh...

9
[Message: To the Hokage-dono]
Samui: ...Understood.
Raikage: I leave it to you!
Omoi: I knew it... I had a bad feeling about this. // ...Shit!
Karui: Oh, don't worry! There's no way Killer Bee-sama could screw up anyway. / This is all probably some kind of bad joke.
Omoi: How can you be so optimistic?! / He may be suffering even now, as we speak...!! Or worse, he may already be...

10
Karui: Shaddup!! I don't have time for your stupid pessimistic ideas! // This is our master we're talking about! This is Killer Bee-sama! / How could he get defeated?!!
Omoi: Are you not worried about Bee-sama, Karui?!
Karui: Bein' worried is no excuse for coming up with morbid delusions!
Raikage: Stop this, both of you...!
Karui/Omoi: !
Raikage: You must save the Bee no matter what it takes!! / Understood?!!
Karui/Omoi: (Raikage-sama...!!)

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Zetsu: This certainly takes a while with our numbers so depleted. // --SHUT UP. JUST CONCENTRATE ON THE TASK--
Kisame: ?!

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Kisame: Looks like... Sasuke made a little mistake...
Tobi: .........
Zetsu: Ahahahah! It's a tentacle! // --STOP LAUGHING!--

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[no text just killerbee]

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KillerBee: (Good... looks like no-one's about. // For an plan I thought up at the last minute, that was pretty good.)
Hachibi: ("Good", my ass! You sacrificed my legs for that plan!)

15
KillerBee: (Hey, hey, don't get so worked up. You've got eight of 'em. Them lil' footsies'll grow back. It was a good plan~!♪)
Hachibi: (Don't you start that terrible rapping in front of me! Talentless fool!!)
KillerBee: (Hey, hey, I know all that. I'm the one keepin' you inside of me, oh yeah~~!♪ // So from now on...)
Hachibi: (What? It had better not be something screwed-up again...)

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KillerBee: I'm gonna sing Enkaaaaaaaaaaa~~ // ~~aaaaaaaaaaaahh!!
[TN: Enka]
Hachibi: (......)
KillerBee: (Still, this turned out well... I'm not stuck under the gaze of that brother of mine any more. I can leave the village - I'm free! // After all, right now everyone thinks Akatsuki are holding me captive!)
Hachibi: (The Raikage will be going absolutely crazy about now... / Don't you mind?)

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KillerBee: (...Hey, I've always been tied down as a village military asset thanks to being a Jinchuuriki, you know... // A guy needs a breather sometime!)
Hachibi: (So... what are you going to do?)
KillerBee: (If I'm doing Enka... it's gotta be Sab-chan-sensei!)
Hachibi: (...Who's that?)
KillerBee: (You should know that, dumbass! I'm talking about the chief of all Enka ninja!)
Hachibi: (You sure are carefree... Akatsuki aren't going to take this lightly, you know? // And after calling me out, you don't even have much strength left in you. / Hell, what was the point even calling me out like that when you were winning anyway?)
KillerBee: (Well, that Sharingan was one of the most powerful things I've ever seen, and that's saying something... // So I kinda got carried away.)
Hachibi: (......The times may be beginning to move...)
KillerBee: (Hm? You talkin' about my Enka?)
[side text: The shocking return of the Killer Bee!! And he escapes the Village of Cloud...]
[bottom text: Pain tramples the village of Konoha!! Next issue, a poster-style colour page!!]